General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[WinterBub]

Thank you, shae!

 

[DobbyForever]

Fluek sorry about all the illnesses hitting your family. Hoping everyone feels much better now. Party sounds great! I agree, you throw great ones. Always sounds super fun.

Shae that’s super frustrating. I will agree there’s never a good time or right amount of money. You just adjust your life to work with what you got. My cousins have a billion kids and make less than I do with multiple incomes. Meanwhile I have one kid and constantly feel broke. hopefully you two can get on the same page. I know you’ve been waiting such a long time to get to this final stretch. Nothing is going to hit the fan lol. Global warming aside, we’re fine. I do agree with Winter. I love A deeply but I couldn’t have been the mom I am today seven years ago. Would I have been a good mom? Yes. But it’d just be different. Once you have a kid, that’s it. Enjoy some time as just husband and wife and yourselves. It’s a lot of change in a year. I am super excited though.

Winter I’m so sorry. Sending hugs. Hopefully the meds work and you can do the transfer next month. Did you already have it removed? If not, I hope it’s a smooth procedure.

A is still home. I was hopeful we’d get a settlement signed. I have to give up fees and withdraw my complaints with CDE for them to agree to a neutral behaviorist, but they are withholding recordings. Once thing I really need, so I can’t let that go. We’re dangerously close to litigation. Sigh.

Seeing is a stretch we still text but we’re still not dating. He’s still traveling an insane amount, given up vacation days to go close deals. I was supposed to see him today, but he got pulled away. He said hopefully the weekend after next, the weekend after that, and during my winter break we can probably get something on the books. I doubt the first will happen. It’s another in between flights situation. In a way it’s nice because my life is a shit show and my mom is exhausted from full time caring for A during the week. I’m trying not to ask for additional favors. So hopefully by the time he’s back in town again A will be back in school.

 

[Flueky88]

Winter thank you. Yes I hate stomach bugs, thankfully the girls usually only get colds. Stomach bugs have been pretty rare and only 1 ear infection so I count my blessings.

I'm so sorry for this setback in going through IVF . Maybe try and think that the wait will make sure your body is in best shape and chance to have a successful IVF? I hope it only sets you back a month and you get to do a transfer around Christmas/New Years.

Shae definitely agree that fretting over money or other circumstances is common among men. My DH was like that a bit. We started ttc a little over 6 months after being married but we had lived together for 4 years prior to ttc. While it took awhile to conceive while trying rather than him telling me not yet, I do feel like we conceived at the perfect time. I was able to go prn shortly after returning to work and when I was ready to go full time I was able to get into a better position with better pay. None the less, it is hard when you aren't on the same page as far as time lines. I do hope he might agree to ntnp sometime after marriage.

Dobby goodness this is getting dragged out for quite a bit. I'm sorry he isn't back in school. I'm glad your mom is able to watch A for you during this time.

AFM, just bust at work as usual. Catching up from being off for 3 days and the lady that helps with records requests has been out sick for 2 weeks. Been pulled in lots of directions at work. I had to work some today to catch up. Hoping next week is better.

We had pictures taken this week. I haven't seen them yet but hope they turn well. So hard with little kids and even more so a group picture with small kids.

I bought myself a fitbit. I've been wanting one for around a year. I saw the versa 4 was on sale and decided to go ahead and purchase it. I like it so far. I was looking at starting a new program on beachbody. I tried PiYO but I just didn't enjoy so decided why should I suffer for 8 weeks doing a program I don't look forward to. I liked the trainer but the transitions were too fast for me as I'm very uncoordinated. So I started 4 weeks for every body. I really like it so far. My weight has been fluctuating but again not really been tracking my food well. Going to try to start it up again so I can start seeing some lbs drop again. However, I do feel like my clothes are fitting different so I think I've made some changes.

Hope everyone has a great weekend and Thanksgiving!

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I’m so sorry this is still going on with A’s school. I’m no lawyer, but personally I would not agree to withdraw that complaint. They have shown they have no desire to act in good faith here, and them still withholding recordings is extra proof of that. Why do they get to decide whether or not a neutral behavioralist can evaluate him? I don’t quite understand how that’s their decision to make. Either way, I think litigation is necessary at this point. Grown adults physically blocked a child from going to school. Heads need to roll. Licenses and jobs need to be lost. The CDE needs to be involved here, 100%. It’s a level of unacceptable that’s hard to even comprehend. At my old job, an ICU nurse blocked the entrance to the ICU so they couldn’t bring a critical patient in because they said they didn’t have enough staff. Another (male) nurse threw a chair at the nursing supervisor and tried to corner her in a room. You can refuse to personally take an additional patient for safety, but you can’t refuse a patient physical entry into the ICU when they are critical and need urgent treatment, they could die! The nurse who blocked the patient from entry was suspended for 2 weeks, and the one who threw the chair/cornered the supervisor was fired and reported to the board of nursing. Point being, this kind of thing should and often does result in loss of job and license.

Flueks I hope the pictures come out well! I tend to think pictures with one kid crying or something are funny rather than bad, and hey, they’re realistic. If no kids are crying, that’s a major win! Good luck with the new Fitbit and workout program!

SO and I have not been working out at all and he keeps talking about starting but then never does it. I didn’t feel like I needed to start very bad, and then yesterday night while saying we should both start working out he said I was “getting a little pudgy” and yes I am still pissed and no he will never live that down. He apologized profusely, but my god, how do you ever think that’s okay to say to a woman? I literally was complimented on my figure the day before at my new job (by a female nurse). When I got mad he was like “I still think you’re beautiful” and I was like “STILL?! As if there’s a reason not to think that I’m beautiful???” This man does not know when to shut up, I swear. Every time he said something stupid I could see in his face the immediate realization that he had f*cked up (or he would have that face when I responded like “tf?!” and he realized how bad it sounded). So yeah, not thrilled with him about that, but he’s been an absolute love otherwise, both before and after the incident. I got home last night from my 3 days away for work and he was so excited to see me.

 

[WinterBub]

Dobby- the school stuff is just ridiculous. I totally understand that they need to resolve these kinds of disagreements with parents somehow. But right out of the gate, it is absurd that he is out of school during that whole time. Obviously that gives them such strong leverage to try and strong arm you I'm glad your Mom can help you out. And again re: the power imbalance- how many parents don't have that support/can't afford to have their kids home, so they can't protest at all Wishing you best of luck with it, and good on you for sticking to your convictions. sorry you're not seeing more of OA, but glad that is kinda working for you!

Sorry that you're so swamped at work, flueky. And congrats on getting the Fitbit! I've had one for years, and love it! I've gotten 4 million+ steps the past couple of years. It is just kind of fun and interesting to look back over your stats etc. And the goal part does really help. Some days it's like "geez, I really need to go do something because I've clearly not moved much yet ". Though there are moments when you are charging your Fitbit, and forget it- "wasting" steps is infuriating once you get into it Glad the photoshoot happened! I'm sure it was like herding cats hopefully there are a few nice shots!

Oh dear, shae. Your OH does really manage to put his foot right in it sometimes. I would not have a been a happy camper, either!!! And I'd go with the unsolicited work colleague compliment as the more accurate feedback Love that he was so happy to see you come home, though I've put on weight through the IVF stuff but OH is kinda into it

AFM- yes, already had the cyst removed. It was very quick and straightforward, though a weird experience I have
some stop gap meds for now/should get the new medication on Tuesday Then I just take that for 2-3 weeks and will go back in to try again. You're right, flueky- it is all about having everything as perfect as possible for the transfer. I had just gotten way ahead of myself, so the whole setback was unexpected. Just need to take all this one step at a time. Thank you all for the support

 

[DobbyForever]

Fluek I’m glad that you got the photos done! It is hard to coordinate. Hope there were some cute, candid mishap shots in there along with some like more formal ones. Oh did you get it on Black Friday sale or just regular sale? I saw some on Amazon. I always crack up how much earlier and earlier the sales start haha. The clothes fitting better is always nice. i think more valuable than the lbs especially if you’re working out and toning/building muscle.

Shae oh Shae. Lol. SO sure does love to put his foot in his mouth from time to time. He has at least one sister, right? Or no. Iy does sound like trying is on the horizon. Speaking of work, how are you liking the new job? I know it’s still new, but hopefully good vibes. Especially if your coworkers are out here telling you you’re pretty

Winter totally naturally yo get discouraged at the setback. I’m glad things are getting back on track though.

Re the school: it definitely makes me sick. They really did try to take advantage of me being a single mom (broke, can’t take time off of work). My grandmother says God gave A to me because he knew A was going to need a teacher mom to advocate for him. But it seriously pisses me off that other people don’t have the same knowledge and resources or language proficiency.

So the hard thing is neither the district nor I actually want litigation. There’s enough gray area in the situation that I would not win in a Cali OAH hearing or I’d spend 50k+ just to get a neutral evaluation. They also have broken enough laws that they don’t want to go in front of judge either. CA has some of the lowest inclusion rates and heavily favors school districts/segregating kids with special needs. Federal law is much more inclusive, so we’d have to make a case that it’s a violation of his constitutional rights and take it to federal court. I have a right to a neutral evaluation, but that only works if he’s currently in school. The IEE needs to evaluate him in a school setting. It’s a giant pain the a**. They really have backed me into a corner, and if I didn’t have the knowledge base and resources then I’d have to just cave. But they picked the wrong mom to f* with lol.

The complaints I will pull if I get a resolution. The first complaint has like 10 citations, 8 of which were petty and 2 are related to him being out of school. The second complaints had 4 citations, 2 were petty and 2 relating to not releasing records to me. And by petty I mean they definitely broke ed code but I don't actually care about those things. They were minor annoyances. But it does gives me leverage because the complaints have to be resolved within 60 days, so if they don't sign the mediation agreement soon then they're going to get hit with who knows what consequences from the CDE.

 

[benni.ali]

In case anyone wants to know how ridiculous California is. *facepalm*

i just got an email from the PTA to do back to school night reg stuff. Money, volunteering.

they suggest:
PTA: join as a member (membership ranging from $15-300 for bragging rights) and donate an additional $250-500 per child. They also suggest 40 hours annually of volunteering per child.
District education fund: $1500 per child
Should your child want to join the elementary choir that 2 parent volunteer days plus $200. Should your child want to join drama I didn’t read the volunteer requirements but it’s $350.

Not to mention we will be asked to donate to the specific class/grade level to fund crafts and field trips and teacher appreciation.

granted all “suggested” but yeah this is why I’m likely only having one kid

Woah, definitely an intense school year start, it sounds intense don't get me wrong but I prefer that situation compared to this here in Canada, the Ontario government once again didn't meet teachers' demands and a second strike is going on as we speak within 2 months. *sighs* good thing after the pandemic, the schools got many virtual education tools out there so kids don't lag behind. Teachers are asking for 30 minute paid prep time which I think sounds reasonable.

 

[Flueky88]

Shae oh man! I'm sorry SO said that. I would be upset too if that happened to me. That was nice that your coworker said that. Are you enjoying your new job?

Dobby, lol yes about the black Friday sales starting so early now! It was a black Friday deal I'm pretty sure.

Well that sounds like a hard situation to be in. I do hope that A gets justice and what is best for him. You are so right that many other parents wouldn't be able to do this because they don't have someone to care for their kid in the meantime nor have the knowledge of navigating the process.


I hope everyone has a happy Thanksgiving!

 

[DobbyForever]

Woah, definitely an intense school year start, it sounds intense don't get me wrong but I prefer that situation compared to this here in Canada, the Ontario government once again didn't meet teachers' demands and a second strike is going on as we speak within 2 months. *sighs* good thing after the pandemic, the schools got many virtual education tools out there so kids don't lag behind. Teachers are asking for 30 minute paid prep time which I think sounds reasonable.

Oh man, a day or a week? Or just additional? Prep makes such a huge difference. I used to have 45m of prep a day and then a 50m lunch at my last school. I'm really struggling to keep up at my new site with 35m lunches and 50m preps 3x a week. Sorry about the strikes! I've never been on strike, it's a whole process to be legally allowed to do it here and we never end up doing it because you need like some high percentage of union members to agree to it after like a crazy amount of time negotiating. Several neighboring districts did go on the strike though, and frankly I voted in my district to strike. I'm glad you've got the online tools and it feels like the kids are still learning. It's never fun.

Fluek thanks. It'll all work out. Yay black friday! I got a few nice deals that I'm super pleased with. My favorite was a pair of really good quality nightstands that perfectly match my bed for $65 for both! I have a few things sitting in my amazon cart that are great deals but I don't know if I actually need them.

 

[DobbyForever]

Black Friday Shopping update lol. Cashing checks future Dobby is going to have to pay.
- Some learning resource toys: particularly counting/sorting bears and cubes to help with A's number decomposition (15% off)
- Cocktail dress for the next time I see OA (10% off)
- Outdoor steel garden bench, supposedly treated for weather (50% off, got it for $41)
- Wooden digital clock/radio/phone charger (22% off)
- 10 x 10 gazebo (53% off, only $140!)
- 7 piece rattan wicker modular patio set (35% off, $340)
And since it's all Prime eligible, no delivery fees!
- And then I got a KidKraft Overlook Challenge Swing Set from Target for my mom's backyard. She has a huge lot with a tiny house, and the backyard is segmented into thirds. One is meant for my dogs, but I haven't raked up the spikey leaves yet. There's a middle one that's huge and barren, which she wants to make a play space for A. Then the one right off the kitchen is a smaller like more hang out area with her grill and patio set. She's been on me about getting something for him for my yard, but he's not bored at my house because we have the dogs and a thousand toys and are rarely home LOL. It says it's not a Black Friday deal, but for whatever reason it's 36% off ($450 instead of $700). Has everything A likes too: hanging and monkey bars, a small rock wall, swings, and a slide.

Only things I need now are to hit Carter's for some next size up clothes for A. I need clothes but I'm starting to have spent too much money lol.

In other news, just got set up with a telehealth child psychiatry service through Kaiser so hoping to get some good resources there.

 

[shaescott]

Winter I’m glad you were able to get the cyst removed quickly. Re: the weight gain, I gained weight in college and SO definitely liked it because it all went to my butt and boobs I still have that weight, now it’s starting to go to my belly a little which I’m not a fan of. But like, he’s not allowed to comment on it, obviously.

Dobs I’m sorry this situation is so crazy. Definitely a good thing you’re familiar with all the laws and stuff. I’d be totally lost in that situation.

Flueks yeah I wasn’t happy

AFM I am enjoying the new job. It’s the same number of patients with less critical patients, so it’s, dare I say, easier. The staff are all very nice so far, and happy I’m there because they need the staff, which is good because sometimes staff hate travelers because we get paid more. I never hated travelers, I was however annoyed at the hospital for being so willing to pay them so much when they could focus on retention and pay staff more as incentive to stay. Regardless, they would rather pay travelers since they don’t have to train them much (I got 3 days orientation, one of which was all admin stuff and no on the floor training, and honestly I was fine with that, it was plenty). I got my first paycheck yesterday, it was $200 less than it will be normally because it was for orientation week and I only worked 31 hours instead of 36, but it was still $2,500 for one week after taxes, and I normally get $1,000 a week after taxes. So yeah, I’m excited.

I hope you all had a lovely Thanksgiving!

 

[Flueky88]

Shae that pay is awesome and even more so that the staff are appreciative. You are very right that there are definitely some negative feelings about travelers sometimes. I think you are right though that the resentment is misguided.

Dobby nice scores from Black Friday!! I hope you were able to buy yourself some clothes for yourself. I've been asking for gift cards for clothes place I like so I don't have to spend as much as my money for myself. Bahaha, I feel like most of mine is bills, food, and whatever the kids need/want. Hope the telehealth appt is helpful!


AFM Thanksgiving was good. I was the admin on call but only had a few calls all day. I fixed turkey in the oven for the first time (I usually do in crockpot). OMG it was soooo good, better than in the crockpot for me. I fixed some green beans with sliced almonds, rolls, gravy, and easy box stuffing mix. DH fixed dessert, MIL brought deviled eggs, and my mom brought broccoli casserole. We went to FIL and stepMILs later in the day. It went pretty well there too.

I was so exhausted Thanksgiving from lack of sleep and trying to coordinate everything. I accidently ruined my food processor (and can't buy a replacement part for what I ruined). Also, instead of moving the switch to lift the stand mixer head, I turned it on with the other attachments in the bowl. I could have bought new attachment(s) but I had been eyeing a stand mixer in the color I wanted for Black Friday. So DH got me to mixer I wanted for Christmas. Now to find someone that might want the mixer and willing to but a replacement whisk attachment.

Put the tree up Friday. This is the first year in awhile that we set the big tree up. It was pretty much just the girls decorating the tree. We are going to look at Christmas lights tomorrow and think we will 1x week until Christmas. I pre ordered to view the one place twice and my work is giving a ticket to view lights at another place. Excited to see their reactions this year

 

[DobbyForever]

Shae haha I feel that. It’s nice when the weight adds to the right places hehe. That’s really awesome that the workload is, in a sense, easier. And yay for great coworkers! I can definitely see both sides to it, but I’m glad you’re in a place that appreciates your presence. That makes such a huge difference. Plus that difference in pay! Hopefully that will help SO see you two are that much closer to baby making time. Just don’t let him watch “Down to Earth” on Netflix haha. I was thinking of his, for lack of better phrasing, doomsday perspective when Zac and his co-host were talking about s* ecologically hitting the fan in like 20-30 years.

Fluek gift cards is a great idea! I ask for cash, so then I end up using the cash to pay bills Even when I get gift cards for like Target or Amazon, I end up spending it on A or stuff for the house or dogs or grocery pickup. But if I got a Macy’s gift card I’d def buy something for me. Oh turkey in a crockpot?! Do you chop it up first? I’m trying to imagine how it fits haha. Have you ever done it in the bbq? My stepdad always cooks the turkey in the bbq because my mom and I won’t give up the oven I don’t really eat much turkey, but the dark meat is juicy haha. Idk about the white meat. Sounds like a great meal with great company! Sorry about the food processor mishap, but yay new things! Love that your tree is up and you’re all getting in the spirit.

Re Black Friday I kept shopping through Cyber Monday. The deals were really disappointing. Black Friday used to mean like 60-90% off. Most deals were just like 10-25%. I got a few blouses and shoes for myself for work, but nothing much. The best deals were for stuff around the house or A. I did get a cherry wood 6 drawer dresser that was about 50% off, snagged it for $180 when it’s normally like $330. I’ve been struggling to put my clothes away because I don’t have a dresser and I went from a spacious walk in closet to just a closet.

AFM mediation today, my sub cancelled last night and 45m before school nobody has taken the job, and my coworker had her c-section yesterday (baby was breech and they didn’t want to try to flip her). Her first long term sub quit after one day. This second one is on the verge of quitting. The telehealth was more intake than anything, so next is a 90m psych eval ugh. Thanksgiving was good. Both brothers were home, so that was nice to see them. I let my class watch the last ten minutes of the US match yesterday OA called me on Monday night because I wanted to beat a dead horse lol. He’s the top candidate for a job in our town that wouldn’t require traveling. There’s some potential political stuff that may keep it from happening, but if it does I’m curious to see if that changes things with our dynamic. He just doubled down that he doesn’t have time to make me a priority (my words but he agreed). He called me between flights at the lounge at the airport. But we’re not sleeping with anyone else and he’s not seeing anyone else. So whatever. He confirmed our plans for this weekend and evidently I am getting a Christmas present. I don’t know what he’s going to get me because I don’t think he really knows anything about me. I know a lot about him because I’ve been to his place and asked a thousand questions . I got him this dumb beard butter gift set thing but it’s the brand he uses, a dive log (he goes diving at least once a year), and a star wars book that supposedly nerdy, bookish star wars people like according to the internet . If I was his girlfriend, I’d have gotten him an underwater go pro because he mentioned that he doesn’t have an underwater camera for his dives. But we ain’t there so I ain’t dropping that kind of cash

 

[benni.ali]

Oh man, a day or a week? Or just additional? Prep makes such a huge difference. I used to have 45m of prep a day and then a 50m lunch at my last school. I'm really struggling to keep up at my new site with 35m lunches and 50m preps 3x a week. Sorry about the strikes! I've never been on strike, it's a whole process to be legally allowed to do it here and we never end up doing it because you need like some high percentage of union members to agree to it after like a crazy amount of time negotiating. Several neighboring districts did go on the strike though, and frankly I voted in my district to strike. I'm glad you've got the online tools and it feels like the kids are still learning. It's never fun.

Fluek thanks. It'll all work out. Yay black friday! I got a few nice deals that I'm super pleased with. My favorite was a pair of really good quality nightstands that perfectly match my bed for $65 for both! I have a few things sitting in my amazon cart that are great deals but I don't know if I actually need them.

They are asking 30 min prep time a day. Woah you had 45min prep a day, that is awesome! Good for you for never being on a strike, I'd imagine that above everything it's a constant atmosphere of uncertainty.... do you have a job? are you getting paid? will all be resolved in a peaceful manner? who knows.... hope everything can be resolved in a win-win situation.

Yeah, good for technology and all of those educational resources out there for kids

 

[DobbyForever]

30m a day is totally reasonable. As long as it's not slated as before school, after school, or added to a lunch aka times teachers already work for free anyway really only helps if your prep is during instructional time.

We should have went on strike. People are leaving that district in droves. They have a ton of vacancies and major issues with substitute shortages. I used to make twice as much as my mom (we got our credentials together but teach in different districts), and we got a total of maybe 3% raise in the 6 years I was there. Meanwhile, my mom's district got COLA and raises every year so the last couple of years she made more than me even though I have a higher degree (impacts your pay). We also had 0% of our benefits paid for, which is actually illegal. They're being sued for it. I changed districts this year. I have my benefits paid for 100% (so I only have to pay for my dependent) AND I'm making nearly 15k more per year. So I think it's better to strike and disrupt things for a month than live in a world where your contract is so awful there's a mass exodus of teachers.

But yeah striking is hard on the staff and the community. We never went on strike, but we did something called Work the Rule for multiple years. Basically meant you didn't work a minute beyond your contract. We'd stand in the front of the school technically off campus until our contract started (which was bell to bell for us). We didn't work during recess. We set our emails to respond during non-work hours with an auto reply that the email was received outside of business hours so we'd respond the following business day. We didn't do report card comments just grades. Like basically, we stopped doing work that we aren't paid to do but do because it's good for the kids. Which is hard. On top of my 45m prep and long lunch, I put in an hour before school and 20m after every day just to keep up on my lesson prep and grading. WTR suckssssssss.

 

[DobbyForever]

Quick update. I think my storm may be coming to an end. If all goes smoothly, we should have a signed mediation agreement within the next couple of days. No major upsets aside, A should be back in school within a week with my preferred BCBA-D running the diagnostic trial.

A had a great night with grandma compared with staying at grandpa's, as expected. Had a lovely sleepover with OA. He officially got the job offer for the company walking distance from his apartment. It's a pay increase and minimal to no travel. I asked him what it means for us, and he said he'll be seeing me more and maybe I'll like him less once we really get to spend time together It was nice. We sat around, talked, drank wine, and went to bed. It was really nice. He was too sick to be frisky, so he made an attempt to make me a happy camper. Walked me to my car in the rain even though he was already dressed for the plane/ work. It's such a foreign feeling to me. Being so respected and taken care of for once. I can't see him next weekend, and then he's off to SF for a conference. I not so subtly reminded him that I am on Winter Break at that same time, so if he wanted me to drive to SF again then I happily would hehe.

 

[Flueky88]

Dobby sounds great on both ends. Prayers it all works out for you and A for both situations!!

Yes I think gift cards are good because I'm more likely to spend on me than bills or something for the girls.

Not much to report here. Once my new billing cycle for my Amazon card starts up, I'll buy DH a gift card and that'll complete Christmas shopping for me. Took the girls to see Santa yesterday. Our local coffee stand had Santa with Rudolf, free cookie and hot cocoa, free face painting, free pony rides, and free "train" rides. We did all but the face painting and pony rides. It was just me with all 3 girls so I was afraid of one of them getting fussy or wondering away. They did really well though with what we did do. It was nice to see them enjoy themselves.

 

[DobbyForever]

Thanks. I spoke too soon. They'll finding reasons to stall signing. It's obnoxious ugh.

That sounds amazing! The girls are so lucky! So glad it worked out with the girls alone. I always wonder how moms with more than one kid make it work, esp with A's tendency to just book it hahah. Sounds like a ton of holiday fun!

 

[WinterBub]

I hope that the school issues are sorted before Christmas, Dobby. And good luck with OA- you never know, the forced distance may have ended up giving you time to get to know each other on a deeper level.

Your Christmas outing sound lovely, Flukey! So glad all the girls had a great time, and it was manageable. My hats off to you taking them all out I took my LO to meet Santa, and it was hilarious. He was awestruck and too overcome to answer anything/function.

Congrats on the new job, Shae! That sounds incredible. I hope youre really proud of how your career has come together. I know some of you have been on here for years longer than I have. But even in my year and a half or whatever it is- you've achieved so much! How are the wedding plans progressing?

Afm- not much going on. Been taking suppressing meds and hoping to start the transfer drugs in the next week or two for a transfer in January. Not counting on anything though, as I was taken aback by the delays last time! Other than that- LO has really.progressed with this speech recently, which has been so lovely. And probably related, he finally is enjoying school. Really enjoying him getting into Christmas at his age The magic is all totally real for him.

 

[shaescott]

POLL TOWARDS END OF POST

Dobs have things been signed are they still stalling? I’m sorry you’re dealing with this mess.

Flueks that sounds like a lovely family day, I can’t wait to take my future kids to do fun things.

Winter that’s hilarious that your LO was awestruck by Santa. I’m so glad his speech is improving! Fingers crossed for that January transfer!
Thank you for the love, I’ve been so blessed the last year and a half in my career. Honestly, I wish SO was having this much luck in his career, because I want to be a stay at home mom

Wedding plans are going well. I just booked the hair and makeup artist. Everyone seems to have a minimum number of people to book, the only one that didn’t called me and left a message instead of emailing or texting me… I will spend a lot more money not to have to talk on the phone with someone I absolutely HATE phone conversations with businesses, it gives me no time to think about my answers and puts me at risk of saying yes to things prematurely because I’m put on the spot. So I booked with one that requires 4 people, which means my maid of honor, bridesmaid, and mother will get hair and makeup done.

I also got an email back from the seamstress I inquired with saying how the process works and that I’d get an email for scheduling my first appointment closer to the wedding date. I’m really hoping that means im guaranteed an appointment, because her website says she’s now full for June brides. I would imagine she wouldn’t send that email if she couldn’t take me, it wasn’t an auto reply or anything. I should probably follow up on that anyway, I’ve decided I do want to put a liner in the bodice of the dress, because the sheerness creates such a visual separation between the top and bottom, in my opinion. I love the visibility of the lace details with the sheer version, but the visual contrast is bugging me too much, it looks like two pieces instead of one dress if that makes sense. I talked to SO about it without showing him what it looks like and only referring to the sheerness showing details vs liner preventing visual separation since he’s an artist, and he agreed that the prevention of such a visual separation is more important. All he knows otherwise is that it’s a ballgown, because I told him from day one that I’d be marrying him in a big poofy dress. I might also ask the seamstress to make the dress a little more poofy, maybe a hoop structure going out from the waist, I want a bit more volume at the waist, not sure if I want more volume for the lower part of the skirt so maybe a more subtle version of a pannier petticoat would work? Idk, I just learned that term today in my googling. I have a hoop skirt somewhere at my parents house, I bet I can try it on with the dress and see how it looks (the dress is in my parents’ bedroom for safe keeping, it’s a cat free zone). If that fixes the issue, I won’t have to get extensive boning work done, which would be nice and save money.

SO realized last week that he forgot to invite a family member couple so he told them their save the date must’ve gotten lost in the mail so now I need to buy a white pan from michaels or something to address one of the extra blank envelopes we thankfully got. That makes 154 people invited

Some time next month we’ll be doing the entree tasting so we can pick our two entrees and open up RSVPs. We already know one we want because one of their wedding offerings is also on their regular menu, and we had it when we tried their food prior to booking, it was fantastic. It has sundried tomatoes in it and SO hates tomatoes but he loved it anyway, the description is: “sautéed chicken breast topped with Monterey jack cheese, chopped bacon, and a maple scallion sundried tomato sauce”. We can’t afford to offer any kind of steak, we’re thinking we’ll try the fish options, but I want you ladies’ opinion. Here are the non-chicken affordable options for the second entree offering, tell me which two you would want as a menu option as a guest!
-Pot roast with pan gravy
-Oven roasted pork with seasonal chutney and pan gravy
-Baked honey Dijon salmon with dill crumb crust
-Baked haddock with white wine, lemon, and bread crumbs

Similarly, we have to pick out hors d’oeuvres. We figured we’d pick 2-3 options plus a cheese platter and/or crudités and dip. Which 3 would you want as a guest?
Hors D’oeuvres options:
-Pesto Meatballs
-Deviled Eggs
-Pigs in a Blanket with Remillard Sauce
-Assorted Mini Vegetable Quiche
-Kielbasa with homemade horseradish, mustard sauce
-Crostini hot with artichoke pâté or cold with herbed fruit or veggie salsa
-Fried Boneless Chicken Tenders with dipping sauce
-Sautéed Boneless Chicken Tenders with honey mustard sauce
-Stuffed Mushroom Caps with seafood or sausage stuffing
-Fried Mozzarella Pieces with marinara sauce
-Stuffed Artichokes - hot with Gorgonzola cheese
-Stuffed Fila Pinwheels - with choice of chicken, sausage or spinach & feta