General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[shaescott]

Dobs I had to Google TK, seems like it’s a California thing. So instead of one year of kindergarten like he was doing, he’ll be doing transitional kindergarten, the first year of two years of kindergarten? Am I getting that right?

Winter the monitor is just to make sure there’s nothing crazy out of whack. If there is, I’m going to make an appointment with a doctor to look more into it. Good to know about the RE vs. OB.

I’m sure the twinges are just stretching. I really don’t know why ectopic risk is higher with IVF when they literally place the embryo in the uterus, but apparently it is. Very odd. Praying that your betas will be nice and high and that this pregnancy is successful.

AFM progesterone was still up last night and estrogen was but I woke up kinda sweaty this morning, which is a pretty good indicator for me that AF is coming. Although I believe it’s caused by decreasing estrogen, and I’m 8dpo, so that’s fairly normal at this point regardless, implantation doesn’t always happen until a day or two later. It would be wild if I one day get my BFP despite night sweats lol. For now though, I’m considering it my sign that AF is coming unless proven otherwise.

Yesterday I sent veil tulle shopping with my soon to be MIL! She’s making my veil for me, she insists there’s no way I’m paying hundreds for a piece of tulle attached to a comb. So, I bought a decorative hair comb that will double as my veil comb. The decorative part is attached with some twisted wire, not glue, so she can just remove it to sew on the veil and then sew the decorative part back onto the comb or something. Idk, she sews a lot, she seemed confident so I trust her lol. The tulle I ended up picking wasn’t actually in the tulle section, it was on the other side of the aisle, but it was way softer and flowed better than the stuff labeled tulle, the tulle was more stiff, and it looked the same, maybe a tighter weave, but just as super transparent. The label was wrong so we have no idea what it actually is lol, it was labeled as a halloween spider web fabric, which it definitely is not. The fabric cutting lady couldn’t match it to any of the tulle so just had to use the label, but it’s whatever. I assume it was a more expensive tulle or something.

 

[WinterBub]

I love that your MIL is making your veil! That's so lovely. At the end of the day, a wedding is two families kind of coming together. I take it as a great sign if you get along that well

Here's to hoping all is fine. Odds are that it is, but like you say, the higher risk of ectopic has me a bit concerned. It is pretty mild and intermittent pain, but anything out of the ordinary in early pregnancy brings out all the fears. Also facing the reality that IVF doesn't magically mean a healthy pregnancy.

 

[DobbyForever]

hugs totally normal to be worried! Every sensation is so stressful. I don’t know how this whole process works, but since they implanted the embryo vs the egg floating down the tube and meeting up with the spermie there wouldn’t that reduce, or possibly eliminate, the risk of ectopic? Sorry if that’s such a newb question. It’s hard not to worry. Hopefully the beta and appointment give you some reassurance tomorrow

It’s confusing haha. He’s changed schools to the one that has the mild/mod sped class but he’s enrolled as a general education TK student. He’s on a two month trial. He has to decrease his behavior by 60-80% to justify staying in Gen Ed. I’m happy in some sense because he’s finally in the placement that I advocated for a year ago. I’m not happy because the district is doing petty shady things still that hurt him. So I know it’ll be a headache again in two months.

 

[DobbyForever]

Oh Shae idk how I missed your post lol. Omg Halloween spider fabric that’s such a funny story. That’s so special and can’t wait to see how it turns out!

Yeah TK is big here in Cali. Can’t say I know any other states with it. Basically kids with birthdays September to December end up being a year younger than their peers. So instead they do a two year kinder program that starts while they’re 4 because it was a ridiculous developmental gap. We’d have kids turning 6 while some kids were still 4. Or just barely turned 5.

 

[Flueky88]

Shae, I took Tylenol during all of my pregnancies. Overall, I try not to take any drug if at all possible though so I didn't take a lot of Tylenol. I seem to recall the studies about Tylenol coming our when I was pregnant with S or E. I continued to use Tylenol if I really needed it but tried to manage without meds. Hoping when it does happen you won't have many aches and pains.

Dobby, ditto what winter said. I didn't know what IEP stood for until the other day.

Winter, I would say it's just uterus stretching out. I feel like I noticed it earlier each pregnancy. I guess because it had already been stretched out. Prayers all goes well tomorrow! A girl I used to work with, pretty sure she had IVF, she went for weekly ultrasounds but I can't remember if they started at 7 or 8 weeks and lasted until like 11 or 12 weeks or if the weekly scans started earlier. I remember when she said she got released to a OB and stopped going to specialist at end of 1st tri. It's been almost 6 years so my memory is a little fuzzy on some details.

AFM had parent teacher conference this past week. It went well. We talked about Vs pronunciation some and mentioned we had tried going to speech therapy at start of 2020 but Covid happened and things just got pushed aside from that, moving, and new baby. So she is going to get the SLP eval her at school and we will meet there her about her findings at the end of February.

100 day of school is coming up. They want them to wear a shirt decorated with 100 items so I hot glued some buttons to a shirt with Vs name on it. I think it came out well.

Going to head out to a kids party in a little bit. First time taking all 3 to a party by myself but I'm feeling brave LOL. It's at a gymnastics place. V and S should be fine but I'll have to watch E prettprogress.

I've been working on organizing things this weekend. I could do more but it's a work in progess. I weighed myself yesterday but am thinking I had water weight because I tracked my food and exercised. I did my measurements as I hadn't done that in months. My waist and hips were smaller so going to focus on NSV.

Hope everyone has a great week!

 

[shaescott]

Dobs TK sounds like a good idea for him then, I’m glad he’s in a gen Ed environment that’s a little less stressful with academic demands, at least as a trial.

Growing up in MA, if you were born by mid-august you started kindergarten just after turning 5, if you were born in late august you were turning 6 right at the start of kindergarten. They didn’t want any 4 year olds in kindergarten. But honestly, I didn’t notice an issue as a kid with the barely 5 year olds. I’m an April baby, my sister is a November baby, and we both learned to read (like it finally just clicked and we could read a book) at about the same point in kindergarten, a bit more than halfway through. In middle school I was friends with a few early august babies, youngest in our class, and they were some of the smartest/most academically advanced in the grade. They never mentioned having difficulty in kindergarten, but I know at least one went to this super prestigious preschool in the area, everyone I know who went there is basically a genius. Maybe that caught her up. The other one, I don’t know, but she did fine. However, this is all neurotypical or mild autism spectrum kids, one definitely is on the spectrum (the prestigious preschool one) but I didn’t even realize until my mom told me she definitely is after we were adults, she’s the one you don’t even realize unless you pay super close attention, girls are also harder to diagnose cuz they mask so well. In retrospect she’s 100% on the spectrum, her brother is too, also super smart and high functioning, but as a guy he’s got more classic symptoms, lack of eye contact, poor social skills, etc.

Regarding the veil, we also paid for the fabric solely in gift cards that SO’s Nana had saved at her house, that SO’s mom had found. His Nana passed away in September unexpectedly if you remember the lobster sepsis story. So I told SO that his Nana paid for my veil, it’s her wedding gift to us


Flueks that sounds like a fair way to handle the Tylenol issue. Only if really necessary so it’s very infrequent.

Good luck with that kids gymnastics party! I remember going to one with the big foam pit as a kid, I loved it.

Re: weight loss, non-scale victories are more important in my opinion. My mom had gastric sleeve surgery in November and looks like she’s lost at least 50 lbs, but she’s tracking loss of inches more than weight. She told me in the past 2 weeks she lost another 2 inches off her waist. She’s waiting until closer to the wedding to order her dress because her size is still changing so rapidly.


Winter my future MIL and I didn’t used to get along as well, mostly because I was a teenager when SO and I started dating, so we were treated like the children we were and not like fellow adults, which was of course frustrating. There was a lot of friction caused by her acting like a protective mom of a child and not of an adult, which of course I understand in retrospect, but hated at the time. I was also very immature and kinda psycho when I was a teenager lol, so she didn’t like me terribly much. I mellowed out and matured significantly after becoming an adult, and I think she saw that and changed how she treated me in response. I’ll always kinda be a kid to her, and so will SO, so we’re not immune to a gentle scolding, but the mutual respect has skyrocketed.

We went to lunch together after the veil fabric shopping and talked for 3 hours, I felt bad for the waitress cuz we totally lost track of time. I told her about my faint positive that happened a year ago now, and she told me the same thing happened to her when she was TTC for SO. She had some trouble conceiving, and had two miscarriages before getting pregnant with him, one at 8 weeks and one at 13 weeks or so, I know it was past 12 weeks. But she said she had a faint positive one month and took another test later that day and it was negative, next day she went to the doctor to get tested and it was negative. The doctor told her that either it was a false positive or she had an embryo start to implant super briefly and then let go, and she just happened to catch that little bit of hcg it produced. Impossible to know. Idk, I still get a little emotional over it, mostly because I just don’t know which happened, and knowing I’ll never have an answer is so frustrating. I can’t just make a decision on what I think it was, because I really don’t know. SO thinks it was just a bad test, my mom thinks it was real, so does my sister. When I got the faint positive they both had a bad feeling it was non-viable, rather than not real at all. It makes me lean towards a CP, but then I feel like maybe I’m just fooling myself.

Okay, enough of my pity party.

 

[WinterBub]

For some unknown reason IVF has a higher rate of ectopic than natural conception I agree with your logic- it seems bizarre that an embryo placed in a good spot would move into the tube, but apparently they do! I guess the artificial usually can't compete with mother nature.

I'm quite shocked at how the school district has behaved. It is absolutely awful, and so upsettingly bureaucractic. Like, honestly, this situation has shown just how powerful the little people in power in the admin have So wrong, so stacked for them and against the kids. I hope A does really well and can stay put. Im also disgusted that they refuse him attendance while you sorted this out. I understand there needs to be a process when the parents and school don't agree, but barring him from school while y'all found that solution is absolutely awful. That should be the last resort, not the first choice!

The TK does sound like a great idea, though. We had a girl in our high school who got skipped ahead. I'd never consider doing that because of what a problem it ended up being for her. While she was smart, skipping her ahead kind of dulled that advantage- she would've gotten better results staying put and competing with younger kids! She also suffered socially when we teens because she was immature. Anyway... Taking the edge off the age difference seems very smart. And they probably are ready for some sort of schooling at the younger age vs just staying home. Good compromise!

Re: Tylenol. I think I took it once. I had a similar feeling- try not to take any meds unless necessary. But I ended up using things I was told were safe. All things in moderation, and in the case of Tylenol, it is really the only option as ibuprofen is a big no no.

Good luck with the speech, Flueky! If you want to compare notes, let me know. I think it has helped my LO, though we changed health insurance and due to cost, he only goes once a week now. My husband thinks he's just improved as he's gotten older... I think there is some truth to that, but his therapist has definitely helped push some things along. Right now they're working on the "v" sound. It is quite hard as you need to put your top teeth on your lower lip and then blow/use your voice all at once. What sounds is she struggling with? My LO is due for a reassessment, as it has been a long time since his first one, and he doesn't have any "goals" left now.

 

[WinterBub]

Now you've made me tear up with the Grandma connection to the veil! That's lovely

And I'm glad your relationship has grown and matured with your MIL. She's definitely gonna cry good tears at the wedding!

 

[shaescott]

GUYS I’M LOSING MY MIND

My progesterone level just shot up. I’m 8dpo. It’s been about 14 the past 2 days and today it’s 38. I peaked at like 3dpo (didn’t test 4-5 dpo, could’ve been even higher those days) at 40 and then 6-7dpo was down at 14, so I think my progesterone peaks kinda early. I did take a cheapie HPT and it was negative, but I’m also 8dpo. Now I’m like omg do I get a blood test, do I calm the f*ck down and assume it’s just a weird fluctuation, what do I do??? My estrogen level is close to where it was yesterday, a tiny bit higher. So now I don’t know what made me have night sweats. They weren’t much, but still. Idk. I’m annoying, I’m sorry

 

[shaescott]

Here’s a chart of my levels. Estrogen has a peak at 2-3dpo and then drops down according to Dr Google, so that estrogen jump on 3dpo is normal.

 

[shaescott]

Okay my mom thinks it’s probably nothing so I’m gonna try to calm the heck down I’m such an anxiety filled human. But hey, if it means nothing, I’ll know for the future not to read into it and that it’s normal for me.

 

[Flueky88]

Shae so sweet that you and MIl have grown together and she's making the veil! So nice to get along with the in laws!

As for the progesterone, I'm thinking it spikes around 8 to 10dpo and then will drop if not pregnant. I could be wrong but I feel like I read that awhile back when I'd obsess over my bbt lol (bbt got autocorrect to but LOL)

Winter I know her teacher noticed issues with K and I'm thinking her D isn't full enunciated either. She did improve over time but I just figured it wouldn't hurt to get an eval.

FX it is just your uterus stretching. The 1st tri is my least favorite. Lots of prayers for you the next 9 months.

Dobby that is pretty nice about the TK program. I think it would be beneficial for more kids to have access to that. I considered holding V back a year but the teacher didn't feel like she needed to when we did her K assessment last year.

 

[shaescott]

Well my estrogen also spiked this morning to nearly 500, so now I’m like HOLD UP cuz since when does estrogen spike at 9dpo, but trying to remember my individual hormone pattern could just be different than the average one.

 

[shaescott]

Guys my mom just had an inkling and now thinks I’m pregnant, I’m gonna lose my mind, I’m at work trying to keep it together until I can go pick up some FRERs

 

[DobbyForever]

Winter hoping everything goes smoothly today!

Flueky, I’m glad they’re getting moving on the speech assessment. Hopefully you get some good data from it and, if needed, she gets some speech services through the school. Oh wow! Kudos to you for getting 100 things to stick to a shirt! I’ve heard of posters but never shirts. Sounds like a task haha. Hope the party went well! I love that you’re taking all three girls out more and more lately on your own. You’re a rockstar! Silly me, what is NSV?

Shae this is quite the ride. Re last year’s line, I think there’s no right and wrong so process it as however makes the most sense to you. Only you know how you bonded with that line, so only you should get to define what it is to process that. I agree, the story about MIL warming up and the gift left behind are so sweet. Love that! As for the progesterone, I don’t know anything about anything. I do second Fluek that I remember reading that progesterone rises in the LP regardless of pregnancy in anticipation of potential pregnancy. Like there’s a dip early in LP then a rise. But don’t quote me. Then if a pregnancy does happen then the levels rise/ stay high and if it doesn’t then it drops. But I wouldn’t really be able to say much more than that so I say just go with whatever your pamphlet says about levels hahaha. Def curious to see what the hpts yield.

AFM just tired. So over everything at this point.

 

[WinterBub]

Hmmm, Shae. I really know nothing about the levels of each of the hormones, even after my experiences and supplementing them as we speak all I'll say is good luck!

I got my beta back, and it was 1330 (I believe... Was writing down what was said over the phone). Clinic was very happy with that number. Go back in Wednesday for a second draw. No weird scar cramping today

 

[DobbyForever]

Winter that’s great news! What a lovely number! Can’t wait for wed’s update and yay for no cramping today

 

[shaescott]

Winter that’s fantastic!!

BFN this morning. Estrogen levels, however, are still climbing, and my progesterone is holding steady. My mom thinks I might have implanted yesterday, which would make a BFP unlikely today. Gonna get a beta done cuz I’m an impatient and curious human lol, worst it’ll be is negative. The spike in levels at 2-3 dpo is an expected one according to Google, just to explain that spike.

 

[DobbyForever]

Sorry about the bfn but I do agree if it’s pregnancy related seems too early. I vote save the money and just keep testing but if it were me I’d probably go get a blood test too lol. Does SO know about the progesterone? And I vaguely remember seeing 0-1 so was there some risky business this month?

 

[shaescott]

Dobs I got the beta drawn anyway lol, just waiting on results. SO is fully in the loop with this situation. He pulled out on O-1. He’s very anxious to find out and would rather I not be for financial reasons, but is already asking what kind of diet I should be eating if I am because he wants to help me be the healthiest I can be if I am pregnant for the sake of the baby.