General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[PrettyInInk42]

Dobby - Well, that's unfortunate. I remember saying maybe he'll be good in bed and you'll be more attracted to him after, but I guess not. Not trying to put him on blast here, but what you described reminded me of SO. His junk is acceptable, but he can finish pretty quickly. He's also a heavy guy, so it's been only me on top for several years. He makes up for it by making sure I'm "taken care of" at least a few times before it's his turn though. I agree with Winter. Maybe give him a few more sessions to see if it gets better and be direct with your instructions.

Winter - My city and the surrounding area have been dealing with a lot of car jackings and thefts in the last year or so. I read that 95 cars were stolen in just the first seven days of this year. There've been some arrests made here and there, but it can be hard to track these people or even catch them in the act.

So, I have a bunch of stuff to report. Literally 2 hours after I last posted on here, SO got a call from the cops saying they found his car parked at the airport. About a 20+ minute drive from us. It's at an impound lot presently, so SO's gonna start the process of getting it back/fixing the broken window. It was a long weekend here, so most things were closed on Monday.
Then, another several hours later, SO gets a call from his stepmom (who has been separated from his dad for years, but that we still like and keep in touch with) offering her condolences about his paternal grandma. She had apparently passed away early that morning. SO's aunt and uncle knew right away, so I guess they told their daughter (who is currently living with them) and she told the stepmom/her ex-aunt. SO's aunt didn't call us until later in the afternoon and didn't seem too happy about how the info got to us, but that's her bad for not calling earlier. I wasn't there when she called, but she apparently said something to the effect of if we don't think the kids can keep quiet during the service, it's probably best if they stay home. If that's the cause, I'm iffy on even attending, but we'll see.
Also on Sunday, long story short, I found out my 2021 taxes were reassessed and I apparently owe $6800 to the government. For whatever reason, they decided to change what I claimed in daycare expenses to $0. And they took my entire tax return for 2022 and put it towards that debt and I still apparently owe like $2700. So, I need to get that rectified ASAP.
And lastly, it would appear some wildlife (I'm guessing squirrels) took shelter in our large patio storage box and completely shredded 7 cushions that go with our patio set. As well as contaminated all the toys in the box, so we're gonna have to toss and re-buy everything. FML so hard. -.-

 

[shaescott]

Pretty I’m so glad they found the SUV!

Dobs oof. He sounds like someone who would be very willing to learn though, so I’d give him some time.

AFM I’m incredibly pissed at my MIL and she didn’t even try to do anything wrong, but she got overly involved in the seating chart after I’d already made it, I tried to set a boundary and tell her it was stressing me out and the next day she was on it again. I said in the moment to SO “this is gonna delay my ovulation I’m so stressed”. Well, I had an estrogen rise and a small LH rise, didn’t get a positive OPK, and LH dropped again, which is what happens when I have a failed ovulation. So her fucking need to be involved has ruined my chance of a honeymoon baby. I’m unbelievably pissed off.

 

[shaescott]

Lol MIL is forgiven cuz my progesterone level today shot up to 12 and my fertility monitor confirmed ovulation. It was under 10 until today so I thought I had failed to ovulate, especially since I never got a full positive OPK, but maybe I just had a weak ovulation. I’m now on track to ovulate during the honeymoon again.

Only 13 days until the wedding. Things are getting super crazy around here.

 

[gigglebox]

Winter I know the heart issue is scary, as is common with newand unknowns situations, but sounds like you have a little fighter in there, and kids are weird. In a few years, when she’s old enough to understand, she may think that’s the coolest fact about her! Glad you have a game plan now. Do you have a nursery for her? if so did you decorate it with a theme? Sorry if I’ve asked this before.

dobs, listen: you can’t change a person’s personality, but you CAN change their performance in bed!! Your situation reminds me an awful lot about my hubby. Out first time left me feeling so uncomfortable. He was really nervous and things didn’t last long and it was awkward. I was talking to my bf at the time and telling her about it…she encouraged me to stick with things because I liked him so much. I am VERY glad I did!!! Things just got better and better. So in conclusion, I agree with the internet lol

pretty oh nooooooo!!! I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with all of that! And wth, “prove” your items were in the car?? How are you supposed to do that? Well plus side is maybe you can “upgrade” to a van. I will say, I fell in love with my van. I wanted an SUV but the van is fantastic for 3 kids, plusI can fit so much in it! I’ve transported 5 pieces of furniture in it this week, including one time when I had a tv stand plus all 3 kids in it, no problem.

shae I echo Winter, maybe just obsess about babies here but don’t let SO in on those thoughts for now. If he’s anything like my SO, the more you talk about something he isn’t entirely on board with, the less he wants to do it. Yay for the wedding countdown!!

afm…just keeping super busy. I’m so hyper focused on getting my house in order that I’ve pushed babies off the brain. Honestly I think I am content with 3. I was getting really anxious when a fourth was on the table (kind of). My mind has been much calmer since putting it off. I am looking forward to doing more things with the boys (like traveling) and I feel like we’re finally in a spot where we can do things like that. All that said, I still think about it…but honestly I feel like my body isn’t in the best shape for making another life. And we have a tonnnnnn to do around here as it is.

I don’t know what started it but suddenly I became extremely motivated to “refresh” things around the house. It started with our bedroom where we had a day to finish painting it. It’s literally been half painted for over a year. Actually I think what started it was I got the motivation to clean it first. It was a wreck. Looking pretty good now! Also, ds1 wants his own room…we are going to surprise him with it next week. I ordered a bunch of minecraft decor (his current obsession), found a desk for free and a dresser for $40. The decor was the most expensive…I dropped $200 on some things for his room and the other room (because I don’t want the other boys to feel left out). He’s going to take my office which is a bummer, but I can fit my desk in my bedroom. For now he’ll just have to share the closet with my jewelry stuff and art supplies. We are going to have to paint it though as my walls are pink.

we’re also going to update the kitchen a little. It needs some crown molding fixed and I am going to wallpaper over part of the wall that has a mural on it I did when we first moved in.

lastly, for now, I have to organize this little space in the corner of the kitchen/dining area that is a disaster. I got a large freestanding pantry and am situating all that today. Everything is in chaos right now but it’s going to be awesome when it’s clean and organized!

 

[gigglebox]

Sorry Pretty!! Just saw the update! Ignore what I posted lol

but wtf with the taxes??? You are definitely owed an explanation on that one. Our taxes are on hold as they “review them” -_- I am unamused. If it turns into an audit I’m going to be livid. Anyway I hope it gets sorted so you have some extra for new outdoor items

Yay for ovulation back on track Shae!! Sorry about all the stress though.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Flueky - Happy 6th Birthday to V!

Gigs - Thanks. I still think SO is gonna look into getting a van. The lease for his current car started in summer of 2021, so we still have a few years on it, but he's gonna ask what his options are for trading in sooner.
I feel you on wanting to organize and refresh. Our kitchen needs a remodel badly, but it's all talk from SO and not getting the process started yet. And I'm equal parts wanting to purge baby clothes and toys for the space and wanting to keep some stuff in case we have an oops. lol

AFM, Zoey turned 1 on Monday and her wellness check was today. She's 23lbs 13oz and 30in long. Her party is this coming Saturday, so I'm trying to clean things here and there to avoid being up til 2am the night before. But that's easier said than done when no one picks up after themselves. Le sigh.
So, last we heard, it's gonna be about 3 weeks, give or take, til SO gets his car back. He had a rental for several days, but there wasn't a guarantee that the car would be back before insurance stopped covering the cost of the rental. So, we're back to a single car family for now, which is fun. :/
In other news, AF decide to show up on Monday. 23 days after my last one started. No idea why so early. Just kinda random.

Here's Zoey on her BDay and after her appt today.

 

[DobbyForever]

Hey all, sorry it’s been unreal over here.

Shae I’m glad that things are back on track with ovulation! I will say though, I think you were fair to be upset. It’s crunch time and, if rom coms have taught me anything, it’s that the seating chart is sacred and stressful. Also one week!!! How exciting!

Pretty that’s so insane about the car! My tenant’s mom just posted that her car was also stolen out of their carport at 1am right in front of the door and they totaled it. I’m glad that they found the car and hopefully insurance covers all the repairs. I’m sorry for the family loss. It’s hard when you have little ones and people expect your presence, you’d like to pay your respects, but end of day the kids are young and have a hard time making it through a service. Do you know where it will be held? I know when my great-gam passed, it was at the family church. So when A got all fuzzy and loud, they had a downstairs child room and we just went to play in there until the service was done. Also wtf re taxes?! It’s crazy how they do that. It always concerns me how quickly those refunds come and how late any “oops ACTUALLY” comes. Frustrating. And ugh about the shed. Hope the party is tons of fun today! Happy Belated Birthday Zoey!

Gigs are you going to chronicle any of the renos/upgrades online? I love me some good home makeover videos hehe. Great finds! Also hopefully the tax review is quick and painless.

Not gonna lie it’s a little sad for me to see all of the K graduation posts. I know I want ed A in TK and it wasn’t my choice to start him in K, but it’s a weird feeling like having this whole trimester of kinder memories that don’t line up with how his end of the year is. Also, my attorney like lost her s* because I refuses to sign A up for home ABA, not that it’s any of her business. She went full b* mode and dropped us as clients right in the middle of signing an IEP.

Re RS, we’re still talking. We had a really weird situation the other day where our communication just failed on both sides but we haven’t been able to address it since he’s had his son all week. We’re supposed to sit down on Monday night to discuss it, and it’s been stressing me out.

Lots of stress in my life right now but all temporary. In good news, I’m excited that A might possibly get some horse therapy. She won’t be able to do it during the school year because of the distance and scheduling around school, but hey it’s something. 2 months is better than no months.

 

[Ellybean]

I have a question for those of you that track cervical mucus and use LH strips. On May 28th I had egg white like cervical mucus all day - like excessive amounts to the point it was on the toilet paper when I wiped. My question is, does the egg white like mucus happen a couple days before ovulation like when you would get a positive LH strip or does the mucus happen when you ovulate?

 

[cheerios]

I have a question for those of you that track cervical mucus and use LH strips. On May 28th I had egg white like cervical mucus all day - like excessive amounts to the point it was on the toilet paper when I wiped. My question is, does the egg white like mucus happen a couple days before ovulation like when you would get a positive LH strip or does the mucus happen when you ovulate?

From my own experience, egg white cervical mucus happens before and during ovulation. It's one of the first signs of ovulation and can last 2 days even?

 

[shaescott]

@Ellybean it depends on the person. For me it often lasts 3-4 days, generally 2-3 days before ovulation and the day of ovulation. Occasionally longer or shorter. My cervix is often high for a solid 5-6 days.

Gigs it’s nice that you’re able to do all those home projects you wanted to do, definitely a perk of the boys getting older and not needing quite as intense 24/7 care. As much as I’d love to see another pregnancy on this thread (other than my own), I understand that it would delay your ability to do quite a few things, like travel and renovations.

Pretty omg she’s so big! I can’t believe she’s one already!

AFM 5 days! Just applied for the marriage license today, will pick it up Thursday. I decided to go for lash extensions, so I’m getting those done Thursday afternoon. Hopefully I like them.

 

[DobbyForever]

Happy Wedding Eve! Hoping all goes smoothly and well today and tomorrow.

 

[shaescott]

Thanks Dobs! It’s hard to believe that it’s tomorrow. Everything is coming together. I’m at the hotel room right now that we’re staying in for our wedding night, I’m about to hop in the shower and shave everything lol. Just copied my vows into a fancy little vows book I got off Etsy, SO has one too. Took me frickin forever, I never have to handwrite anything anymore and I didn’t even realize that until it took me 30 minutes to copy 2 paragraphs. I could type that in 5-10 minutes. The decor is loaded into MIL’s car. Our friend was able to snag the really good sound equipment for the reception (he works for a sound equipment rental company and they let him borrow what’s left over for free since we’re not paying him) and it’s all loaded up. So far it says it shouldn’t rain but today we had a sudden short burst of rain in the evening and the forecast said nothing about it and even when it was happening the weather app said it wasn’t raining. So that stresses me out, especially with all the super expensive equipment. We have a rain plan but if it comes out of nowhere it’ll be an issue. AHHHHH STRESSSSSS. So many little details that need to come together. Other people are dealing with pretty much everything but I coordinated it all until the actual doing everything, so I worry people are going to come to me with a million questions tomorrow. I meant to send out a cute little schedule thing I got off Etsy that said “Confused? Lost your pants? Call anyone but the bride and groom (unless they stole your pants)” but I didn’t have time really to finish it cuz Microsoft word sucks on my phone. Okay, I gotta hop in the shower, hair and makeup starts at 9:30 am tomorrow because we have one stylist for all 4 of us.

 

[DobbyForever]

You're going to the chapel and you're gonna get married!

Breathe! My other friend is getting married tomorrow as well, and let me tell you... s* be hitting the fan. So it sounds like you are in a fantastic place! Enjoy tonight! Are you staying with SO or doing the whole see you when we're married bit? Eeeeep I cannot believe it's here!

 

[DobbyForever]

PS love that lol don't bring yo drama to the bride and groom unless they caused your drama

 

[Flueky88]

Hope the wedding is wonderful and no rain! Enjoy your honeymoon Shae!


Sorry I will try to do a full reply Sunday

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Dobby - The funeral is gonna be at a funeral home, surrounded by a cemetery. No parks or anything near by. It's this coming Monday and I wasn't gonna pull the kids out of school/daycare for it. But it turns out Alex has a PA day and doesn't have school. My mom pointed out though that he'd probably get pretty bored. So, I'm gonna give him the option to come with us or stay home with my mom. We'll keep Matthew in daycare, but I'm like 80% sure I'll go and bring Zoey. I'll just leave the room if she gets antsy.
Sorry for all the stress you're dealing with. But, like you said, it's all temporary. And FX everything works out with the horse therapy. Has he ever done anything like that before?

shae - All I can say is I wish you the best for tomorrow. You only get one wedding (generally, lol), so just soak it in and try to enjoy it.

AFM, Zoey's party went well. Not crazy hot, but warm enough for the kiddie pool. A good turn out, but not an overcrowded house. Just a perfect day for a perfect girl.
Still haven't gotten SO's car back and no idea how far along they are in the repairs. He sent an email asking about it, but hasn't heard back.
Bought the boys summer passes for a local trampoline park, so I'm sure they'll be burning a lot of energy there over the summer. lol

 

[PrettyInInk42]

A few more party pics.

 

[gigglebox]

SHAE CONGRATULATIONS!!! I can’t wait to hear about how the wedding went!! Hopefully no drama and it went smoothly and you got some care free BD in we were so exhausted that we didn’t seal the deal until the next morning lol.

pretty, she’s adorable in that dress! And the cake, so cute!!!

Dobs what happened with RS? I’ll post some before and after pics of some things I’ve been doing around here but I didn’t really document it in action. Here’s the first thing I did (other than change my seat covers): ok just kidding it’s not working, I’ll upload later

 

[DobbyForever]

Ditto! Congratulations Shae! I hope your wedding was as stress free as possible and you got to enjoy all of your hard work and planning and waiting. Can't wait to hear your update when you have a chance.

Pretty she is so cute! I agree with Gigs, such an adorable dress! Also love all of the butterfly theme! The trampoline park is a good call. I'm about to do the same lol. And sorry his car isn't back yet. Hopefully you'll get an ETA soon.

Gigs looking forward to seeing your handiwork!

Re RS things are not good. So I felt like his communication is super passive and that he's been holding back from me, so I told him I'm worried that if we continue communicating like that it will build resentment because he's not advocating for his needs and therefore they're not getting met. And now he's on this whole "I need space to think about this" thing that I interpret as giving up. His whole thing is it's too early in a relationship to be having such a serious conversation about working on our communication. So we're just at this weird stand still.

But school is out. Have the contractor FINALLY coming out next weekend to fix my patio, so hopefully I can get the backyard set up to spend more time out there with A and the dogs.

Oh also my friend, the one I had to cut out, found a workaround to me blocking her on everything. Her son was just diagnosed with a a lymph node cancer. So I'm trying to figure out how to respect boundaries but also be a support to her and her family. Thankfully, the internet says most people with treatment have a 80-90% survival rate. So hopefully he'll pull through this.

 

[gigglebox]

Oh no that’s quite upsetting Dobby. I hope he’ll be ok. What do you mean she found a work around? Did she contact you to tell you the news? Also her situation is very sad but I don’t think you are required to be her support system if you were trying to cut her out of your life. Just my opinion..

sorry to hear about RS! There was such potential there! I can understand his thoughts but also I feel like being up front about expectations is respectable. Maybe he feels it’s too soon to open up? Regardless, are you just waiting for him to contact you now?

what’s wrong with the patio? This weather has me craving more outdoor time, too. I think I’m going to get some kiddie pools tomorrow for the boys. I need to find out some outdoor ideas for DS1…he’s getting too old for some of these activities. Fortunately he still enjoys the trampoline for now but it’s getting too hot to do except for mornings…

ok got one of the pics to upload. This was our “catch all” corner. Now it’s got home school items, some art supplies, and stationary. Oh also cook books.