General chatter while we wait (and commentary on the "pull out method")

[shaescott]

Gigs we’re the first in our friend group to get married. One other couple remains, but the guy is the type to drag his feet, so I doubt he proposes any time soon even though they’ve lived together for a few years now. The other two of DH’s friends are single, one just recently out of a 5 year relationship, and does not want kids at all whatsoever (even though we all agree he’d be a fantastic dad, but his dad left him at a young age and moved to Texas with his new wife and had new kids, so he’s got trauma).

I thought every state had FMLA but I could totally be wrong and do not feel like googling it hahaha

Yeah unless my sister marries a girl who wants to take her last name, my maiden name dies with my dad. He was an only child. It was honestly really hard to give up my name, I mean it’s literally your name, it’s hard to just change it when you’ve been using it for your entire life. It’s like changing a major piece of your identity. But I did it, for multiple reasons, including that I want to have the same last name as my kids, and that it was super important to DH.

Autumnal I’m glad I’m not the only one who got married at what people now consider a young age! Makes no sense to me why it’s controversial to get married in your early to mid 20s, but apparently it is.

AFM, DH got this email this evening!

It sounds really promising so we are hoping their wording isn’t giving us false hope.

 

[gigglebox]

oooh Shae let us know how the call goes!!! That would be insanely cruel to send a message like that only to say, "sorry, you aren't qualified for this position". Eeee!!!

fun little giglebox trivia for ya...I actually changed my name before the wedding, haha. I wasn't attached to my maiden name. I didn't have the greatest relationship with my father or his side of the family growing up, and I thought it was kind of an ugly sounding name anyway. In retrospect it's really not that bad...but I like my married name much better.

Also I'm struggling to think of a name for the kid if it's a boy. I think we'll come to some sort of agreement on the first name, but for the second name I feel like I should be naming the baby something to do with my side of the family if it's a boy....but I don't wanna. I thought I should name him after my father, but as I mentioned, I didn't have the greatest relationship growing up. It got much better as an adult, but then I resented him for being a lackluster grandfather to my kids. I also feel slighted that his dying wish was that I go visit my incarcerated brother, whereas he left his precious sports car to my oldest brother. Yup that seems fair and equal.

So then there's my Mom's side of the family, but the only name that really suits is "David" (her father's name), which is little too traditional for my taste, and also my MIL's husband has that name and while I love him, I don't feel like I want to name my kid after him (seemingly).
We had this same problem with the last boy. In the end, in the recovery room, I decided I wanted his middle name to be of the man I respect more than any other man I've known -- that being my husband

anyway I'm open to suggestions lol. Jez came through with a name suggestion last time so here's hoping y'all help me again haha

 

[shaescott]

HE PASSED! Just barely, the recruiter said that he “managed to sneak in” with his score lmaoooo but he did well enough to qualify for the unpaid training, which is kinda like a coding bootcamp but free. It’ll take 1-2 months. After he gets through that, he’ll move on to the paid training for 1-3 months, and then he’ll get his placement with a company!

 

[shaescott]

DH is just so incredibly excited. He’s felt like he was treading water in a hurricane with no end in sight, and now he feels like there’s light at the end of the tunnel. This training is going to be incredibly hard, but they’re giving him a chance, and that means everything to him. If this works out, we can start TTC in like… 6 months? Maybe less? Whenever he gets a placement and we move and he feels like he knows what he’s doing lol

 

[gigglebox]

Woohooo!!!! Tell him congratulations for us!!! That’s so wonderful!

 

[shaescott]

Gigs thank you!!!

Okay I hear you need names so I’m gonna run through the ones we’ve picked out/like.

Our top boy name right now is Theodore, and we’re not using a family name as the middle name for that one as we don’t think any of them fit well. We decided on Theodore James. Sounds classic, and we can call him Theo or Teddy. Our second boy name choice is Benjamin, which is a family name, with a few options for middle names, two of which are family names (Daniel and Charles), and one of which has a cool meaning (Levi, who was the son of Leah in the Bible, which is my first name). If we’ve got more than 2 boys we’ll probably move to Jacob (DH’s brother’s name) and who knows on the middle name.
Additional boy names on my list, mostly under possible middle names: Isaiah, Oliver, Henry, Max, Emmanuel, Finnegan, Everest

We definitely prefer more traditional names, I think. I saw something that said this generation of parents tends to search for names in their grandparents era, and I definitely find that accurate for me. Our top girl name choice is Ellie, we decided full legal name will be Eleanor. Though I adore Elora or Elodie, DH doesn’t like them. Sad. Second girl name choice we agreed on is Charlotte, unsure of middle name choice there. Third is Daisy. I like Daisy Mae but it sounds SOOOOOO southern. We are not from the south lol. So middle name is very up in the air for that one as well.
Additional girl names on my list, the first few are first name and then the rest are middle name ideas: Aria, Madeleine, Adeline, Grace, Clara, Violet, Rose, Hazel, Claire, June, Juniper

 

[gigglebox]

All beautiful names, just none we would personally use as we typically don't do traditional. I really love Aria though, I worked with an Ari when I was fresh outta high school and I always loved that name! I also really love June but I don't think hubs would ever go for it. Everest is a good one too, but I love Everette (one of my kids' middle name that in retrospect we kind of wish we used as a first time, but alas) and I also like the variation Ever, although I feel like it sounds, as hubs would say, "too hippie" lol.

I recently met an Elora, then had a foot in mouth moment when I asked if it was from the movie Willow, and added "no judgement!" when I asked *insert awkward laughter face*. Mom was like....no. LOL; I do really love that name too though, but too close to my real name, actually my first and middle names oddly enough. Also.......Willow.

Our top runner name for years was Ember for a girl. Now hubs has fallen out of love with it, and I kind of have, too. So if it is a girl, we'll be back to the drawing board on names. We were totally set on Ember for years so kind of funny we're now both like...eh. I still like it a lot but it doesn't feel like "the one" like it used to.