Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[Rebecca_B]

I wonder how Rebecca_B is getting on..........

Hi ladies,

Well i had my baby last night will fill you in with pics more later just wanted to let you know the details.

5pm round a friends 2nd birthday party and waters popped!!

5.05pm Hubby picked me and george up leaving big puddle in dining room ha ha!

5.15 Phoned labour ward gave details and had first contraction, was told they would ring midwife on call to inform and would ring back.

5.30 tens machine on and set up contraction master on line, rocked on birth ball.

5.45pm Labour ward rang to say midwifes attending another homebirth but labour seemed well progressed so would relieve one to come to me asap. depending on how quickly i would progress it maybe that i have to transfer as there would be no one to attend my labour. so all about a question of timing.

6.00pm contractions are showing 3 mins apart lasting around 1 min

6.45 Mum arrives and we are chatting between contractions, some of which are quite intense but tens machine really helping.

7.20 Mum rang labour ward to ask if midwifes at other home birth anywhere near finished as my contractions are 2 mins apart and lasting 1.30 mins. Labour ward rand within minutes to say other baby not yet born so for that reason i had no choice but to transfer.

Arrived at hospital at 7.45 after getting stuff together and timing all my movements between contractions which were strong and intense.

Was examined at 8pm and was 9 cms.

Moved to labour ward and was relieved to get back on my ball and finding my rhythm. Found the last centimetre really intense and was soon feeling the urge to push.

Started pushing at 8.15 and gave birth at 8.29pm

Charlie James Bloor

8lb 6oz

covered in vernix and he was so perfect and not too squished looking.

Im feeling absolutely fine baby feeding well already and i was able to leave after paperwork was done.

Home by midnight.

Will post pics very soon when transfered to laptop. still in nightie about to have breakfast.

Not totally gutted about not birthing at home as it just couldnt be helped.

Would have been a perfect homebirth though!!


Love to all. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[wannabubba#4]

Well done Rebecca - sounds perfect!!

You done all the hard work at home anyway, shame there wasn't a mw to support you through the full journey though. xx

This has given me so much hope though, so thanks -my situation is likely to be very much the same -have been warned already that the mw's are very busy around the time my LO is due and there's every possibility I'll need to transfer in last minute too.

Hope you and Charlie are both doing well, and love to all the family xx

CONGRATULATIONS !!!! Lookin forward to a pic of your lil guy xxx

 

[Mervs Mum]

Well done Rebecca! Circumstances beyond our control cant be helped but it sounds like you had the next best thing!

xxx

 

[Celesse]

Congrats Rebecca!

 

[cupcake23]

Congratulations Rebeccca.x.

 

[madasa]

congrats rebecca! if i have another hospital birth, i hope it goes half so well as yours did! it sounds like it was wonderful, even if it wasn't at home. well done you! i can't wait to see pics

 

[Janidog]

Congratulations Rebecca

 

[Janidog]

My midwife did a home visit today to discuss my home birth, she hopes to be back from holiday before I go in to labour cause she wants to be there.

The only down side is that if i go over 10 days then i don't get my home birth, so i need to do everything i can to get him out before then

 

[roc]

wow, a lot going on now, haven't been on here in a few days, and 2 babies born, and another on the way!
Congrats Carrie and Rebecca!
Good luck nightkd!


Well as for me, i'm not sure i'll be getting my HB after all, had my MW appoinment day after i'd been to see comunity Matron, who had given me the go ahead..
Well basically MW had me in tears, said she wouldn't want to be the one to have to deliver my baby, and when i mentioned the manouvers for shoulder dystocia being the same in the hospital, she said, she'd never done them, and loads of other MWs wouldn't have either, so wouldn't be comfortable, she kept going on saying did i not know the risks of shoulder dystocia etc..
and what it meant, then made me go meet her in the hospital later to see the birth suite..
I'm so gutted, and after my appoinment with her, it was all i could do to just keep it together to make it home, then called my hubby, had a big panic attack, which really freaked him out, he then ran out of work to come home, as i was not in a good state.. have been crying all weekend, she really scared me, i'm ok now, but feel really nervous about what's going to happen?

I haven't written all she said to me, can't deal with it, but you get the gist..
Sorry to go on, just really sad about the not just lack of support, but really blatant scare mongering, i thought midwifery was supposed to be a caring profession?

 

[wannabubba#4]

Roc -what a bitch of a mw IMO -I'd be phoning up the community matron and telling her how the conversation went -sounds to me like she was peeved cos you went over her head, more than anything else.

Yes you want sound safe advice, but to leave you in a state like that is not on at all.

Hope you are okay xx hugs to you xx

 

[roc]

Roc -what a bitch of a mw IMO -I'd be phoning up the community matron and telling her how the conversation went -sounds to me like she was peeved cos you went over her head, more than anything else.

Yes you want sound safe advice, but to leave you in a state like that is not on at all.

Hope you are okay xx hugs to you xx

yeah, i'm still a bit shocked to be honest, can't quite take it all in, i will be contacting the matron again, just trying to figure out, what exactly i want to do now, i'm feeling very confused and overwhelmed at the moment.

Also though, she didn't even know i spoke to matron until i told her, i don't really have a regular MW, think i may have seen her once before?

 

[cupcake23]

Roc....my blood is boiling for you!!!!

I'm a midwife and if that's what she said then she shouldnt be a registered midwife, I would actually report her to the NMC, how dare she says she doesn't know how to deliver a baby 'if' it's shoulder dystocia WTF?!?

It's one of our competencies, and if she's a community midwife it's even more important that she is confident in this. I would speak to the community manager, refuse to see this midwife again (she doesn't even deserve to be called a midwife!).

Please don't let her stupidity stop you having your homebirth.

Please pm if you need any help.x.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Any news on NKD?

 

[roc]

Roc....my blood is boiling for you!!!!

I'm a midwife and if that's what she said then she shouldnt be a registered midwife, I would actually report her to the NMC, how dare she says she doesn't know how to deliver a baby 'if' it's shoulder dystocia WTF?!?

It's one of our competencies, and if she's a community midwife it's even more important that she is confident in this. I would speak to the community manager, refuse to see this midwife again (she doesn't even deserve to be called a midwife!).

Please don't let her stupidity stop you having your homebirth.

Please pm if you need any help.x.

Thanks so much cupcake, i'm only just starting to get angry now, as i've been so upset, my hubby and i have decided we definitely want to make a complaint, i'm just so confused about what i want to do, that we want to figure that out first, the thought of any of the community MWs arriving at my house come the time, makes me feel a little sick i have to say, i don't know if i would want any of the ones i've met near me, and in contrast the MWs at the hospital have been so kind and caring towards me...
I feel like possibly the damage may have been done iykwim?
and even though my logical mind is telling me there's no reason why anything should go wrong, i have this awful niggling feeling i can't get rid of...

 

[roc]

Any news on NKD?

i was wondering this too.. i guess no news means things are on there way?

 

[cupcake23]

Definitely complain, there's giving you information so that you may make an informed choice but at the end of the day its your choice! The fact she is trying to scare you and put doubt really shows lack of care, understanding and consideration of your specific needs.

I can completely understand your feelings on doubt, I was always scared that if something went wrong I would always have hanging over me 'she should have known better!' but when I really thought about it all I ever wanted was to birth my daughter at home, there are risks to everything in life and you cant nitpick at everything. If the matron was happy for you to have a hb then why is she trying to scare you? there's just no need for it.

I would talk to the matron, complain and discuss your concerns and ask why the community midwives are treating you like this. I'm sure not all of them are like this but just make it clear you do not want further care from this particular midwife, I would also contact PALS just so you are going through the proper channels and that the hospital are aware of the difficulties pregnant mothers are coming up against when wishing a hb.

It just seems to me that's there's a particular culture in this team/ certain midwives to scare and cause doubt.

I really do wish you have a good outcome in all of this.x.

 

[roc]

Just got a call from MW, asking what had i decided, i said all i've decided so far is to go and have a look around the mw unit, i half told how upset i was etc.. but didn't have it in me to let rip like i'm sure i'll wish i had, just so drained and worn out with it now?

In the end she told me i was down for a homebirth, but i needed to know risks etc..they're starting to sound like broken records! and her supervisor might call to just make sure i fully understand the risks etc.. i have said that i do about a million times now, but oh well..

Still not sure about what i want to do to be honest now, i will plan for my homebirth, but i do feel i've been robbed of a lot of the positivity i had for it, just gonna try and get my head around things..sorry for going on about my little issues ladies!

 

[roc]

Definitely complain, there's giving you information so that you may make an informed choice but at the end of the day its your choice! The fact she is trying to scare you and put doubt really shows lack of care, understanding and consideration of your specific needs.

I can completely understand your feelings on doubt, I was always scared that if something went wrong I would always have hanging over me 'she should have known better!' but when I really thought about it all I ever wanted was to birth my daughter at home, there are risks to everything in life and you cant nitpick at everything. If the matron was happy for you to have a hb then why is she trying to scare you? there's just no need for it.

I would talk to the matron, complain and discuss your concerns and ask why the community midwives are treating you like this. I'm sure not all of them are like this but just make it clear you do not want further care from this particular midwife, I would also contact PALS just so you are going through the proper channels and that the hospital are aware of the difficulties pregnant mothers are coming up against when wishing a hb.

It just seems to me that's there's a particular culture in this team/ certain midwives to scare and cause doubt.

I really do wish you have a good outcome in all of this.x.

Thanks sooo much for all the advice cupcake, i will complain, and get in contact with PALS, not right this minute, but i'm writing down and logging everything, so i don't forget, and i can deal with it when i'm in the right frame of mind iykwim?
There does seem to be something about this particular team alright, and i found out the name of this last MW, so now can say i don't want her etc..

I'm sure i'll be fine, i'm already starting to sift through the fog if you get me, and will just suck it up, and get going on my plans.

 

[cupcake23]

They are not little issues!

Talking to a supervisor is normal in cases were they believe you should be in hospital, this is really just to go through the concerns and the plan they will make if you still decided on a hb, but am I correct in saying that both the matron (who probably is also a supervisor) and consultant are happy for you to have a hb? Is she really clutching at straws?

When you speak to her supervisor listen to what she has to say....explain your understanding of the situation and then inform her of the poor care recieved and that you really believe this midwife needs to go on a communications skills course, I would be so bloody cheeky and give her some websites with info

I'm just being silly now...but this has really p'eed me off!

keep us updated.x.

 

[marley2580]

Just got a call from MW, asking what had i decided, i said all i've decided so far is to go and have a look around the mw unit, i half told how upset i was etc.. but didn't have it in me to let rip like i'm sure i'll wish i had, just so drained and worn out with it now?

In the end she told me i was down for a homebirth, but i needed to know risks etc..they're starting to sound like broken records! and her supervisor might call to just make sure i fully understand the risks etc.. i have said that i do about a million times now, but oh well..

Still not sure about what i want to do to be honest now, i will plan for my homebirth, but i do feel i've been robbed of a lot of the positivity i had for it, just gonna try and get my head around things..sorry for going on about my little issues ladies!

Get in touch with AIMS hun, they'll be able to help you sort out what to do - https://www.aims.org.uk/