Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[Mervs Mum]

On my plan I have put that I do not want internals and I also do not want to know dilation or time.

It's funny you just reminded me of something! I put the same on my plan and at one point I was hanging over the side of the pool in the kitchen and I must ave been looking at the wall clock. I mentioned something about time and the MW said 'If you look at that clock once more I'm taking it down!!' Thinking back I really stuck lucky with the MW who came to me. We have an 'on call' system and she live and works on the other side of the valley to here. It's quite suburban here but where she's from and works is very bohemian and 'alternative'. Almost everyone home births/hypnobirths etc so she was on EXACTLY the right wave length for a HB

 

[Blob]

You did have a good MW Lisa i really hope mine is even half as good eeek!!

They are seeing me next week about baby being breech so atleast they are being good

Also do you have my name down for one of the book?

 

[Mervs Mum]

I do - I'm gonna need more before they arrive at this rate. It's well worth the read though. Inspirational stuff

 

[wannabubba#4]

Its funny my MWs wont even discuss birth plans or what i want or anything other than putting my name on a list They arent horrible about it just not really wanting to do anything either

Mine were the same - wrote in my notes -for home confinement, will be contacted by team leader and that was it lol, until 36 weeks -since 36 weeks I have spoken to the team leader twice, she is visiting this week to dro pof stuff and then I have an antenatal appt at home with her next week too so try not to worry too much about it -I was flapping at 36 w because I hadn't heard anything,but had by 36w+3. Lol

Prior to this whenever I asked anything, I was given the same answer -'you'll discuss it with the team leader at approx 36w' haha

xx

 

[lozzy21]

Blob thats shocking. My midwife will be filling out the forms at my next apointment and then aranging to come out to do the home assessment.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Just to let anyone know who's interested, I have got 20 copies of Birthing The Easy Way by Sheila Stubbs being shipped to me today by Sheila herself. This is essential reading (not available in the UK) for all birthing women and in particular home birth hopefuls - very empowering stuff. A few girls on here have read it and can tell you what an amazing book it is. PM me if you are interested in a copy as I am taking small deposits for pre orders and they are going fast!

https://www.birthingtheeasyway.com/

 

[MadamRose]

Only 2 weeks today until i see my midwife, im trying to prepare myself for the bad reaction i may get when i tell her i want a homebirth. As she has already said she doesnt think one is advisable

 

[wannabubba#4]

Oh exciting yay!!


My mw has just dropped off my birthing kit - so much stuff lol -As a nurse I should have had some insight I s'pose lol - the ' just incase' stuff like cannulas, oxygen masks, emergency airways, needles, insulin, etc haha OMG emergency room under my stairs!! It's s oreal now -I am having a baby this month!!!!!

C'mon lil baby we are truly ready to meet you now please please please


Due#1 - hope your appt with mw goes well

xx

 

[MadamRose]

Hope your little boy comes and meets you soon and hope the homebirth goes well

 

[madasa]

On my plan I have put that I do not want internals and I also do not want to know dilation or time.

I don't think this is necessary... I cut it out of my plan. I just thought "They aren't gonna get their fingers in there without my permission and I won't give them my permission!"

I felt just like you re internals, but when my MW arrived I was really curious so I consented to just one.... I wouldn't have any more though, because if I'd been going "too slowly" I might have been pressured to transfer.

On hindsight, I should have really insisted that she use external signs to estimate my dilation, because my waters had gone, so I was at increased risk of infection. If my waters HADN'T gone I wouldn't have let anyone in there, in case they broke them! Labour is much more comfortable when they are intact IME.... slower, but more comfortable.

 

[trumpetbum]

Exciting wanna bubba

 

[Janidog]

I had to go and see a consultant today to check everything is ok with my gall bladder, which is it is, but then she noticed that i am down for a home birth and started tutting saying i should be having my baby in hospital and then listed all the things that could go wrong, basically asking if i could live with myself if something went wrong and i started wondering if she is right and maybe i shouldnt have my home birth after all I also had to make an appointment for 4 weeks time to discuss an induction

 

[lozzy21]

I had to go and see a consultant today to check everything is ok with my gall bladder, which is it is, but then she noticed that i am down for a home birth and started tutting saying i should be having my baby in hospital and then listed all the things that could go wrong, basically asking if i could live with myself if something went wrong and i started wondering if she is right and maybe i shouldnt have my home birth after all I also had to make an appointment for 4 weeks time to discuss an induction

What they dont tell you Jani is the things that can go happen at a hospital birth. She is just trying to scare you. Yes things can go wrong with a home birth but they can go wrong with a hospital birth and would be dealt with in excatly the same way.

You midwife has everything at a home birth that she would have in hospital, The only thing you dont have is an epi or a section. An emergancy section takes 15-20 mins to set up even if you are in hospital so most people have plenty of time to get to the hospital if baby need getting out quick. They suusaly have an ambulance on standby for you.

But should someting go wrong in hospital there is a good chance you would be sharing a midwife with 3/4 other women. She only pops in and out untill you are ready to push. At home she would be with you from earlier on and you have her sole attention. So should something bad happen your midwife would notice a lot earler and be able to get you into hospital before they would have notced had you had a hospital birth.

 

[Ju_bubbs]

Hmm.. my blood pressure is getting lower and lower by the day! It's gone down to 80/50 today, I'm a bit worried that this will effect my home birth.. any ideas?

Lozzy, some great points you've made there, I never thought of it that way!! I'm gunna write it down incase i get any arguments about my homebirth

 

[Janidog]

I had to go and see a consultant today to check everything is ok with my gall bladder, which is it is, but then she noticed that i am down for a home birth and started tutting saying i should be having my baby in hospital and then listed all the things that could go wrong, basically asking if i could live with myself if something went wrong and i started wondering if she is right and maybe i shouldnt have my home birth after all I also had to make an appointment for 4 weeks time to discuss an induction

What they dont tell you Jani is the things that can go happen at a hospital birth. She is just trying to scare you. Yes things can go wrong with a home birth but they can go wrong with a hospital birth and would be dealt with in excatly the same way.

You midwife has everything at a home birth that she would have in hospital, The only thing you dont have is an epi or a section. An emergancy section takes 15-20 mins to set up even if you are in hospital so most people have plenty of time to get to the hospital if baby need getting out quick. They suusaly have an ambulance on standby for you.

But should someting go wrong in hospital there is a good chance you would be sharing a midwife with 3/4 other women. She only pops in and out untill you are ready to push. At home she would be with you from earlier on and you have her sole attention. So should something bad happen your midwife would notice a lot earler and be able to get you into hospital before they would have notced had you had a hospital birth.

Its the reason i want a home birth because staff shortages worry me and my own midwife is being so supportive, its just a shame when you have to deal with negative people all the time when its meant to be such a special moment

 

[lozzy21]

I had to go and see a consultant today to check everything is ok with my gall bladder, which is it is, but then she noticed that i am down for a home birth and started tutting saying i should be having my baby in hospital and then listed all the things that could go wrong, basically asking if i could live with myself if something went wrong and i started wondering if she is right and maybe i shouldnt have my home birth after all I also had to make an appointment for 4 weeks time to discuss an induction

What they dont tell you Jani is the things that can go happen at a hospital birth. She is just trying to scare you. Yes things can go wrong with a home birth but they can go wrong with a hospital birth and would be dealt with in excatly the same way.

You midwife has everything at a home birth that she would have in hospital, The only thing you dont have is an epi or a section. An emergancy section takes 15-20 mins to set up even if you are in hospital so most people have plenty of time to get to the hospital if baby need getting out quick. They suusaly have an ambulance on standby for you.

But should someting go wrong in hospital there is a good chance you would be sharing a midwife with 3/4 other women. She only pops in and out untill you are ready to push. At home she would be with you from earlier on and you have her sole attention. So should something bad happen your midwife would notice a lot earler and be able to get you into hospital before they would have notced had you had a hospital birth.

Its the reason i want a home birth because staff shortages worry me and my own midwife is being so supportive, its just a shame when you have to deal with negative people all the time when its meant to be such a special moment

I know how you feel hun, im having a faf on with my consultant even though my midwife has given the go ahead. It makes you doubt your decision and your abilitys

 

[Mervs Mum]

wise words from Lozzy

Ju - mine is always about the /50 mark and it's just not a problem at all

 

[Blob]

Wannabubba i think i'm going to pass out when the MW brings all the stuff around..then have TONS of doubts It will feel so real

 

[LolaAnn]

just a note re internals, I did not want any at all... unfortunately for me my mw was a complete b*tch.. she actually said she wasnt going to call for the second MW until she knew how far along I was, and that meant no G&A until then! I kept saying no no no but in the end it was like I couldn't win... sigh.. I'm so jealous of everyone with supportive MWs because tbh the internals really ruined my whole experience.

 

[madasa]

just a note re internals, I did not want any at all... unfortunately for me my mw was a complete b*tch.. she actually said she wasnt going to call for the second MW until she knew how far along I was, and that meant no G&A until then! I kept saying no no no but in the end it was like I couldn't win... sigh.. I'm so jealous of everyone with supportive MWs because tbh the internals really ruined my whole experience.

In the UK they have a legal obligation to attend you. She would not have been able to carry through with that threat and stay on the right side of the law. Sorry you had such a crap mw!! That is YOUR vagina and NO ONE has the right to stick their fingers in there if you do not want them to. The rules are the same for the medical profession as they are for your husband, or a chance met man in a night club: NO MEANS NO - and they CANNOT threaten to withhold care unless you "consent". Forced consent is no consent at all. I would go so far as to say this is assault. So sorry you went through that