Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[Rachiebaby24]

Can someone explain to me what is "psychological third stage" etc is?? I keep seeng it on here and dont know what that is

 

[Mervs Mum]

Rach - It just means you dont have the injection to expel the placenta...you let it come away naturally

 

[Rachiebaby24]

oh ok....ta

 

[nightkd]

I don't know if anyone else might find these helpful, but I was just having a read and found this website quite informative.

https://www.givingbirthnaturally.com/birth-positions.html

There are links a little further down the page which contain descriptions of the different kinds of positions (hands and knees, standing, squatting and so on) and the benefits of each one.

xx

 

[Blob]

Manda congratulations You sounded like you did amazing well done you...

 

[mrsraggle]

Well my midwife finally responded today and said her supervisor has refused based on my raised BMI. I'm more upset about it than I thought I would be - my midwife was so supportive of it but just had to get permission I thought I might get away without a fight. The supervisor has offered to come out and see me so I guess I need to start my super research - ER, where did you start?

It's a real shame that women's birth choices are "decided" by people that haven't even met them.

 

[EternalRose]

Well my midwife finally responded today and said her supervisor has refused based on my raised BMI. I'm more upset about it than I thought I would be - my midwife was so supportive of it but just had to get permission I thought I might get away without a fight. The supervisor has offered to come out and see me so I guess I need to start my super research - ER, where did you start?

It's a real shame that women's birth choices are "decided" by people that haven't even met them.

Hi ya hun first of all big hugs I know that sinking feeling well but if you fight for it you will get your homebirth ( It shouldnt have to be this way and I nearly didnt but Im glad I did ) I let out a huge sigh when I read this..Im sitting here with my cup of tea angered to be honest. No one is allowed to refuse your choice of birth or tell you what your "allowed " and " not allowed" to have. I had to say this to the consultant, who nearly went there! He quickly backtracked as soon as he knew I wasnt going to take his rubbish.

I would definately contact AIMS..or check this site and explain your situation and see if they can offer you advice on where to go from here but just so you can speak to someone as they are very experienced in hearing these type of stories. But, you will always have our support here as well as we are the BNB homebirth mafiosa! ( Isnt that right Lisa? )..https://www.aims.org.uk/
There is a section on there called having problems getting a homebirth.

I would then read over the homebirth website it is preety extensive but it will surely get you clued up...https://www.homebirth.org.uk/ There is a section on there called You cant have a homebirth, because your too big/heavy e.t.c

I would then read this site...Is Weight a Contraindication for Homebirth?

https://www.gentlebirth.org/archives/lrgmoms.html

I also had a look at this site..https://www.plus-size-pregnancy.org/

I am glad the supervisor has offered to come over, but I would strongly suggest going above the supervisor and asking for a meeting with the Head of Community Midwives. You do not want this woman coming to your house and giving you a scaremongering talk! They always like to cover themselves by stating they have to inform you of the risks but if this is the case, why do they not inform us of the risks of a hospital birth? And there are many.

There are some examples on that homebirth website of how to compile a letter to the midwives explaining that you WILL be going ahead with your homebirth and you need to book it in but I would definately see about maybe getting a meeting with the Head, as the constant scaremongering can wear you down and this supervisor has supposedly already refused you.

Let me know what else I can do to help hun

Edit: Bournefree on this thread is a lawyer on this thread ( I hope she doesnt mind me saying that ) who had GD and came up against the same sort of resistance but went onto have a successful homebirth. Her birth story is in the birth announcements section. She gave me some helpful advice here, https://www.babyandbump.com/bnb-groups/255340-home-birthers-hopefuls-81.html#post4405374 x

 

[EternalRose]

Ive added a bit on the end Mrsraggle. x

 

[mrsraggle]

Thanks Eternal Rose, will get reading up!

Have you found that your community midwives are just as supportive now as before? I'm worried that by fighting it, I may then get some horrible midwives at the birth!

 

[EternalRose]

Thanks Eternal Rose, will get reading up!

Have you found that your community midwives are just as supportive now as before? I'm worried that by fighting it, I may then get some horrible midwives at the birth!

Up untill my 33 week midwife appointment, I had never seen a midwife more than once anyway but I was worried about this too hun. They are going to start visiting me at home now, and I expect them all to be professional and supportive. In return, I will be nice and offer them tea and biscuits If they are not supportive, I will be making a complaint But I very much doubt if they know you "know" your stuff and you have had meetings with the Head of community midwives or supervisors they will start messing around as they know you will be looking out for it and they wont want to get in trouble. Thats how I see it hun, definately stand your ground. x x

 

[Mervs Mum]

ER - can you believe YOU are now the one doing the advising on this?!?!!! I LOVE IT!! Look at how informed and empowered we are all becoming every day. Perfect for International Women's week!

 

[EternalRose]

I just had a midwife call to confirm our appointment next week to book in this homebirth, its the one I saw last week. She was very nice on the phone, it seems she was going to be on nightduty next friday so instead of sending someone random she has got them to change her offduty for the previous day so that she will be the one coming to see me Getting them on your side can be done, and a good bit of flannel can always go a long way ... x

 

[EternalRose]

ER - can you believe YOU are now the one doing the advising on this?!?!!! I LOVE IT!! Look at how informed and empowered we are all becoming every day. Perfect for International Women's week!

I know, I feel all grown up now.. x x

 

[Mervs Mum]

 

[gina8177]

Congrats again Manda! You were amazing and he is beautiful!!!

And congrats and welcome to team pink pops!

 

[cupcake23]

Well done Manda, your little boy is gorgeous!!!

Glad everything went well but it's a shame they didn't have any common sense.

.x.x.x.

 

[Caz-x]

Congratulations hunni, he's just gorgeous xx

 

[nightkd]

I've been watching some births with women using hypnobabies and it sounds like a good CD set to have.... I'm still having issues with the lady I bought the Mongan Method book off of, so I think I'm just going to cancel the transaction, leave her negative feedback and go to a shop and buy the book at full price!!

Does anyone have the hypnobabies CDs that they could send to me via an audio file? I have to wait until the end of the week before I can even consider getting the actual CDs/course because DH gets paid on Thursday and the money from his last check has gone towards rent and into our medical bank account...

xx

 

[Mervs Mum]

I dont have hypnobabies but I can try send you the 4 files from the Mongan Method CDs? I'm not sure how like....

 

[Bournefree]

Thanks Eternal Rose, will get reading up!

Have you found that your community midwives are just as supportive now as before? I'm worried that by fighting it, I may then get some horrible midwives at the birth!

Don't you worry about this at all! I kicked up a right old stink (as ER has said) and my MWs before the birth, and the MWs that came to our birth, were brilliant and very supportive. It is afterall their chance to shine. They are not the Obst, or the hospital MWs (no offence to them, but they rarely get to see a "normal" delivery). The community MWs are the professionals who are trained in HB, and I found them very willing to be part of your experiance.

Once my HB was taken seriously enough, one of the side effects was, I was seen by more than a few student MWs who tagged along to get HB experiance.. which was great. I had students at my anti-natal appointments, a trainee senior MW who came along for our meeting at our flat to asses the suitability for HB (don't worry about this either, they just need to know you have running hot water, heating and don't live in squallor). The students also came out to me whilst in labour - I felt quite honored to be part of the education and experiance of the next generation of MWs, who hopefully will also see HB as a wonderful option for women, which they can help support.

Stick to your guns - if a HB is want you want and you have weighed up any potential risks/benifits - no one can stop you.
xxx