Home Birthers & Hopefuls!

[mrsraggle]

Thanks Eternal Rose, will get reading up!

Have you found that your community midwives are just as supportive now as before? I'm worried that by fighting it, I may then get some horrible midwives at the birth!

Don't you worry about this at all! I kicked up a right old stink (as ER has said) and my MWs before the birth, and the MWs that came to our birth, were brilliant and very supportive. It is afterall their chance to shine. They are not the Obst, or the hospital MWs (no offence to them, but they rarely get to see a "normal" delivery). The community MWs are the professionals who are trained in HB, and I found them very willing to be part of your experiance.

Once my HB was taken seriously enough, one of the side effects was, I was seen by more than a few student MWs who tagged along to get HB experiance.. which was great. I had students at my anti-natal appointments, a trainee senior MW who came along for our meeting at our flat to asses the suitability for HB (don't worry about this either, they just need to know you have running hot water, heating and don't live in squallor). The students also came out to me whilst in labour - I felt quite honored to be part of the education and experiance of the next generation of MWs, who hopefully will also see HB as a wonderful option for women, which they can help support.

Stick to your guns - if a HB is want you want and you have weighed up any potential risks/benifits - no one can stop you.
xxx

Thank you, that's really encouraging to hear x

 

[gina8177]

I've been watching some births with women using hypnobabies and it sounds like a good CD set to have.... I'm still having issues with the lady I bought the Mongan Method book off of, so I think I'm just going to cancel the transaction, leave her negative feedback and go to a shop and buy the book at full price!!

Does anyone have the hypnobabies CDs that they could send to me via an audio file? I have to wait until the end of the week before I can even consider getting the actual CDs/course because DH gets paid on Thursday and the money from his last check has gone towards rent and into our medical bank account...

xx

I started my hypnobabies classes last week, so I have all the CDs. I can send them to you. I have class tonight so I won't have time today, but send me a PM to remind me so I don't forget! (You know how our memories can be, lol).

So far I'm really enjoying the class and can keep you posted. The reason I ended up choosing hypnobabies over hypnobirthing is that you can still choose to walk, talk, etc with hypnobabies, which is important to me, especially the mobility.

 

[mrsraggle]

I emailed AIMS yesterday as per ER's advice and got a really positive and motivating email back today with lots of advice. I have Friday off work so I'm going to spend the day really looking at all the links and preparing my argument!

 

[Mervs Mum]

Excellent MrsR!

 

[Mervs Mum]

Home birth discussed on Womens Hour last week

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00qzkk8

It's right at the start Well worth a listen.....

 

[Bournefree]

Fingers crossed for you Celesse. Get bouncing on that ball, and cleaning the skirting boards on all fours. Have you tried sex?
When I was examined during my sweep, (trying to avoid being induced, as you are) my cervix was posterior too. The sweep worked for me - it was almost exactly 48hrs later and my baby was born. Are you getting any tightenings since your sweep, any gunky stuff?
xxx

I was getting gunk and tightenings before the sweep and still getting a bit now. I was surprised when she said the cervix was only loosely on baby's head due to the symptoms i have been having. Feeling very deflated.

Going to try and spend the evening on the ball. As for sex, OH has a bit of a gunk problem..ie he won't go near it.

Hahaha - well the gunk is a great sign!! I don't think you need his help.

By the sounds of it, your baby is on the way! Don't feel deflated.. honestly!!! My cervix was still long, and not tight over babies head.. but it soon (even though it didn't feel like it at the time) changes. About 28hrs after the sweep I was examined at home to see where I was and, I was the same diallation as the sweep, but having irregular contractions all over the place, and more, and more gunk kept coming... which was a really good sign, (also don't panic if it is slightly bloody: as long as it's not dripping blood, it's all normal). So even though at 28hrs - things were mostly the same for me physically with my cervix, but my tightenings had increased; Some long, some short, It's all part of the "readying" process of your body - it will build, and you will feel more comfortable mentally with the sensations. After all the intermittant stage, it didn't take too long (about 12hrs), for them to form some kind of pattern, and for me mentally to feel totally different and ready for the baby.

In my opinon your not going to be longer than a few days!! Keep busy, try to distract yourself; it all helps to pass the time, and that is what you and your baby needs, is time - don't make any hasty decisions, and get the MWs to come to you (if you are unsure), they can help you asses what is going on. (I think I found that the worse bit in the begining; the whole not knowing where you're at!) Say focused, and relaxed (that might seem like a oximoron, but it is something that being pregnant enables you to do)
You are doing great!!!! xxxxx

 

[EternalRose]

I emailed AIMS yesterday as per ER's advice and got a really positive and motivating email back today with lots of advice. I have Friday off work so I'm going to spend the day really looking at all the links and preparing my argument!

Well done hun x x

 

[EternalRose]

Home birth discussed on Womens Hour last week

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00qzkk8

It's right at the start Well worth a listen.....

Listening to this now.. x

 

[MandaAnda]

Celesse, I know it seems like not much is happening; but it went quickly for me in the end.

Last Monday, I had a sweep. Cervix was posterior, 1cm long, soft and 1cm dilated. Nothing happened afterwards that I remember.
The next day, I had another sweep. Cervix was still posterior, although slightly. Everything was the same otherwise. Nothing else that day except for the increased period type pains, which I'd been having anyway.
On the Wednesday, I started losing plug bit by bit every time I wiped. I was still having the same old period type pains. I went and layed down on the bed to ring my mum just for a chat and update, and while I was talking to her, I felt a *pop* that felt like the baby had shoved his hand through somewhere. It then dawned on me that it was probably waters, which was confirmed by standing up and *woosh*!

So, from my first sweep with not much seeming to happen (the midwife was planning on coming Thursday morning for another - she really didn't think much would happen by then), I'd had him by Wednesday night. Fingers crossed for you!

 

[Bournefree]

Celesse, I know it seems like not much is happening; but it went quickly for me in the end.

Last Monday, I had a sweep. Cervix was posterior, 1cm long, soft and 1cm dilated. Nothing happened afterwards that I remember.
The next day, I had another sweep. Cervix was still posterior, although slightly. Everything was the same otherwise. Nothing else that day except for the increased period type pains, which I'd been having anyway.
On the Wednesday, I started losing plug bit by bit every time I wiped. I was still having the same old period type pains. I went and layed down on the bed to ring my mum just for a chat and update, and while I was talking to her, I felt a *pop* that felt like the baby had shoved his hand through somewhere. It then dawned on me that it was probably waters, which was confirmed by standing up and *woosh*!

So, from my first sweep with not much seeming to happen (the midwife was planning on coming Thursday morning for another - she really didn't think much would happen by then), I'd had him by Wednesday night. Fingers crossed for you!

I couldn't agree more MandaAnda!
Enjoy these early moments, you will never experiance it again (even if you have more children) it won't be exactly the same. Your little baby will be cradled up with you soon. You might think it sounds all soo silly, but I would be in labour everyday if I could, it is such a rush, and each moment getting to hold your baby is unique and special!
xxxx

 

[Rachiebaby24]

When did everyone have a proper talk with their mw's about a homebirth??

My original mw was all for it and was great! But she left last month and so i have a new mw. Only, i met her once, she was very rushed and didnt talk to me at all really. Just measured my belly and thats pretty much it. I havent heard from her since. I tried calling her as i have no appointment with her and no answer! So i texted her and still no reply. Who do i call next?? I have 6 and a half weeks to go to my due date! Given that Maley was early and my labour was quick, im worried about her reliability. What do i need to get ready? Should i do a birth plan now? Im feeling really unprepared with regards to the mw. Im not worried about giving birth or even giving birth with just me and Oh if she doesnt get there in time, but i dont want to be left for hours and hours and not hearing from her.

The last decent mw appointment i had was well over a month ago!

My anxiety levels have really gone up the last few days and i dont know why.

 

[Bournefree]

Home birth discussed on Womens Hour last week

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00qzkk8

It's right at the start Well worth a listen.....

Listening to this now.. x

Thank you for posting
I really enjoyed this, even though I have found myself so fuming with the guy from the Royal College of Obst - Just listen to how he tackles the subject of a lack of midwives. (which he brings up - as they always do!)

He states, that in a busy maternity department, some midwives have to leave to attend home births - and he said it in a way, that should some how send a message; that having a homebirth is selfish!!
He is implying that we are taking skilled, qualified midwifes away from other women - because we are lucky enough to get one to one care, and in most HB one to two care..... arhhhhh I'm fuming!!!! I'm just staggered he is suggesting any women having a homebirth should feel guilty for using too much of the service!!! 10min 20sec in!!!

I don't mean to turn this into a sexist argument, but why are there so many bloody men Obst??? and why are they telling us what we can, and can not do with our bodies?? They haven't ever, and will never experience it.

As a side note, I sought the advice of a different Obst from my male mid late 40's Obst.. to a woman Obst who had children, who supported my HB plans; even though, with Gestational diabetes and it was against hospital policy (I did remind her, the hospital policy had nothing to do with me, as I wasn't planning to be in hospital), she admitted I would prob labour and birth at home fine! - where as the gent Obst just wouldn't budge from policy and couldn't see the stupidity if his argument)

Arhhhhh - it really shouldn't have too be this hard. Yes, be informed of facts, yes don't intended to risk your baby beyond what you think is correct for you. Shoulder dystocia and prolapsed can happen to anyone; I personally feel less likely, if you are relaxed and comfortable.. and there is nothing like being at home for that, for me.

I don't need doctors there every time I have a poo - and that’s a physical function, that carries risks; I could strain too hard and prolapse, bust a vessel, haemorrhage and die - but, come on, very rare!! There are risks with everything - you have to weigh it out for your own situations and beliefs in your own body and all aspects of the medical profession, and there competance.

 

[Rachiebaby24]

Home birth discussed on Womens Hour last week

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00qzkk8

It's right at the start Well worth a listen.....

Listening to this now.. x

Thank you for posting
I really enjoyed this, even though I have found myself so fuming with the guy from the Royal College of Obst - Just listen to how he tackles the subject of a lack of midwives. (which he brings up - as they always do!)

He states, that in a busy maternity department, some midwives have to leave to attend home births - and he said it in a way, that should some how send a message; that having a homebirth is selfish!!
He is implying that we are taking skilled, qualified midwifes away from other women - because we are lucky enough to get one to one care, and in most HB one to two care..... arhhhhh I'm fuming!!!! I'm just staggered he is suggesting any women having a homebirth should feel guilty for using too much of the service!!! 10min 20sec in!!!

I don't mean to turn this into a sexist argument, but why are there so many bloody men Obst??? and why are they telling us what we can, and can not do with our bodies?? They haven't ever, and will never experience it.

As a side note, I sought the advice of a different Obst from my male mid late 40's Obst.. to a woman Obst who had children, who supported my HB plans; even though, with Gestational diabetes and it was against hospital policy (I did remind her, the hospital policy had nothing to do with me, as I wasn't planning to be in hospital), she admitted I would prob labour and birth at home fine! - where as the gent Obst just wouldn't budge from policy and could see the stupidity if his argument)

Arhhhhh - it really shouldn't have too be this hard. Yes, be informed of facts, yes don't intended to risk your baby beyond what you think is correct for you. Shoulder dystocia and prolapsed can happen to anyone; I personally feel less likely, if you are relaxed and comfortable.. and there is nothing like being at home for that, for me.

I don't need doctors there every time I have a poo - and that’s a physical function, that carries risks; I could strain too hard and prolapse, bust a vessel, haemorrhage and die - but, come on, very rare!! There are risks with everything - you have to weigh it out for your own situations and beliefs in your own body and all aspects of the medical profession, and there competance.

i agree with everything you say!!

And as for the risks, women die from childbirth complications in hospital....i believe that if its going to happen it will.....not always being in hospital is the be all and end all. Some hospitals are so understaffed that the staff miss certain things. It has been known to happen and just because your in a hospital doesnt mean you wont die!

I dont see why we are made to feel bad, selfish or mad to want to have our babies where we want. I happen to think its mad to want to go to a place for the sick, to have a baby with a mw you have never met and who might go off and attend to someone else. I would rather one on one in the comfort of my own home and if that makes me selfish then so be it.

If women feel better in a hospital then great for them. But not everyone does.

 

[Bournefree]

When did everyone have a proper talk with their mw's about a homebirth??

My original mw was all for it and was great! But she left last month and so i have a new mw. Only, i met her once, she was very rushed and didnt talk to me at all really. Just measured my belly and thats pretty much it. I havent heard from her since. I tried calling her as i have no appointment with her and no answer! So i texted her and still no reply. Who do i call next?? I have 6 and a half weeks to go to my due date! Given that Maley was early and my labour was quick, im worried about her reliability. What do i need to get ready? Should i do a birth plan now? Im feeling really unprepared with regards to the mw. Im not worried about giving birth or even giving birth with just me and Oh if she doesnt get there in time, but i dont want to be left for hours and hours and not hearing from her.

The last decent mw appointment i had was well over a month ago!

My anxiety levels have really gone up the last few days and i dont know why.

Don't panic!

In realty all your need is the right number to call when you are in labour - if you got that, then your fine. Not the hospital, (or I'm sorry to say, they could direct you into hospital). I got given the community MWs bleep number. I left a message, got a call back within mins, from the oncall MW co-ordinator (course, it might be different in your area)

Your MW can only really give you facts, and do all the test that they need to do within your appointment time.. so ask to have a special meeting. Most arrange a home visit for HB with a senour MW, so they can make time for you to ask and answer any questions you have. Mine was at 38 wks, but if you feel you have concerns about being early, tell them; make the appointment with your gp receptionist -and ask for a double app next time with your MW. (Remember you can see your MW, at anytime she is there; like a dr, all you have to do is phone and make the appointment, if you want to see them sooner than the allotted 2 or 1 weekly appointment in late pregnancy) You then have the time for them to take through everything and all the questions you might have... about there setup for HB. Press the issue, to find out these answers, even if you meet the receptionist from hell, and can't get that double appointment! They will, they have to make time for you.
Let us know how you get on
xxxx

 

[Rachiebaby24]

When did everyone have a proper talk with their mw's about a homebirth??

My original mw was all for it and was great! But she left last month and so i have a new mw. Only, i met her once, she was very rushed and didnt talk to me at all really. Just measured my belly and thats pretty much it. I havent heard from her since. I tried calling her as i have no appointment with her and no answer! So i texted her and still no reply. Who do i call next?? I have 6 and a half weeks to go to my due date! Given that Maley was early and my labour was quick, im worried about her reliability. What do i need to get ready? Should i do a birth plan now? Im feeling really unprepared with regards to the mw. Im not worried about giving birth or even giving birth with just me and Oh if she doesnt get there in time, but i dont want to be left for hours and hours and not hearing from her.

The last decent mw appointment i had was well over a month ago!

My anxiety levels have really gone up the last few days and i dont know why.

Don't panic!

In realty all your need is the right number to call when you are in labour - if you got that, then your fine. Not the hospital, (or I'm sorry to say, they could direct you into hospital). I got given the community MWs bleep number. I left a message, got a call back within mins, from the oncall MW co-ordinator (course, it might be different in your area)

Your MW can only really give you facts, and do all the test that they need to do within your appointment time.. so ask to have a special meeting. Most arrange a home visit for HB with a senour MW, so they can make time for you to ask and answer any questions you have. Mine was at 38 wks, but if you feel you have concerns about being early, tell them; make the appointment with your gp receptionist -and ask for a double app next time with your MW. (Remember you can see your MW, at anytime she is there; like a dr, all you have to do is phone and make the appointment, if you want to see them sooner than the allotted 2 or 1 weekly appointment in late pregnancy) You then have the time for them to take through everything and all the questions you might have... about there setup for HB. Press the issue, to find out these answers, even if you meet the receptionist from hell, and can't get that double appointment! They will, they have to make time for you.
Let us know how you get on
xxxx

Thank you!!! I will try again tomorrow. I am concerned about going early! My BH are painful already and she is engaged and i been having period pains. My mum had me and my brothers and sisters at 36 weeks and Maley was 10 days early! I know thats not mega early but given that the baby isnt a whopper, i just want to feel prepared in case she does come a bit early.

I am concerned that if i go into labour, i will end up having to call the hospital who will want me to come in and i dont want that!

I will let you know how i get on. Thanks!!!!!

 

[Bournefree]

Home birth discussed on Womens Hour last week

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00qzkk8

It's right at the start Well worth a listen.....

Listening to this now.. x

Thank you for posting
I really enjoyed this, even though I have found myself so fuming with the guy from the Royal College of Obst - Just listen to how he tackles the subject of a lack of midwives. (which he brings up - as they always do!)

He states, that in a busy maternity department, some midwives have to leave to attend home births - and he said it in a way, that should some how send a message; that having a homebirth is selfish!!
He is implying that we are taking skilled, qualified midwifes away from other women - because we are lucky enough to get one to one care, and in most HB one to two care..... arhhhhh I'm fuming!!!! I'm just staggered he is suggesting any women having a homebirth should feel guilty for using too much of the service!!! 10min 20sec in!!!

I don't mean to turn this into a sexist argument, but why are there so many bloody men Obst??? and why are they telling us what we can, and can not do with our bodies?? They haven't ever, and will never experience it.

As a side note, I sought the advice of a different Obst from my male mid late 40's Obst.. to a woman Obst who had children, who supported my HB plans; even though, with Gestational diabetes and it was against hospital policy (I did remind her, the hospital policy had nothing to do with me, as I wasn't planning to be in hospital), she admitted I would prob labour and birth at home fine! - where as the gent Obst just wouldn't budge from policy and could see the stupidity if his argument)

Arhhhhh - it really shouldn't have too be this hard. Yes, be informed of facts, yes don't intended to risk your baby beyond what you think is correct for you. Shoulder dystocia and prolapsed can happen to anyone; I personally feel less likely, if you are relaxed and comfortable.. and there is nothing like being at home for that, for me.

I don't need doctors there every time I have a poo - and that’s a physical function, that carries risks; I could strain too hard and prolapse, bust a vessel, haemorrhage and die - but, come on, very rare!! There are risks with everything - you have to weigh it out for your own situations and beliefs in your own body and all aspects of the medical profession, and there competance.

i agree with everything you say!!

And as for the risks, women die from childbirth complications in hospital....i believe that if its going to happen it will.....not always being in hospital is the be all and end all. Some hospitals are so understaffed that the staff miss certain things. It has been known to happen and just because your in a hospital doesnt mean you wont die!

I dont see why we are made to feel bad, selfish or mad to want to have our babies where we want. I happen to think its mad to want to go to a place for the sick, to have a baby with a mw you have never met and who might go off and attend to someone else. I would rather one on one in the comfort of my own home and if that makes me selfish then so be it.

If women feel better in a hospital then great for them. But not everyone does.

Absolutley!! The care I got from my MWs during labour, birth and postnatal, were topnotch..... I couldn't rate them higher. I'm not going to feel like I'm selfish for having the number of MWs in attendance as I did, I feel proud, and VERY fortunate. my now close friends from anti-natal classes all had the experiance of a hospital birth, and there MWs where hardly with them. "Bleep and they shall come" was one of my friends comments.

I had at least one midwife in attendace from the 3 and half hours before she was born. Plus even way before that, when I was in latent labour, the oncall MW was happy to stay with me for 6 hours till her shift finished - amazing care. It's deffiantly better.

Selfish? No, it'S our right!!! I would have been at home without that care (but very surprised it was there, and made full use of it) It's our right to choice. That was the one of the major benifits of HB!!! Don't get me wrong, I delivered her and deff, did all the hard work, (they wern't medically needed, but they were there for support, and that made me feel brilliant.
xxx

 

[nightkd]

Talk to him and let me know. It think we struggled to zip last time. They are all roughly 20 min tracks. I have MSN but I dont really use it so you'll have to bear with me if we try that route

I spoke to DH and he's just asking how many Mbs they are... He said zipping audio files doesn't generally do much, so not much point trying that. He reckons MSN would be easiest; we've only had trouble with one file on MSN and that was because it really was HUGE (video/audio file)

Obviously depends on the internet connection too - I'll use DH's computer because he's plugged in whereas I'm on the WiFi, which should make it a bit quicker...!

I'll PM you my MSN and we'll see how it goes

xx

 

[nightkd]

I've been watching some births with women using hypnobabies and it sounds like a good CD set to have.... I'm still having issues with the lady I bought the Mongan Method book off of, so I think I'm just going to cancel the transaction, leave her negative feedback and go to a shop and buy the book at full price!!

Does anyone have the hypnobabies CDs that they could send to me via an audio file? I have to wait until the end of the week before I can even consider getting the actual CDs/course because DH gets paid on Thursday and the money from his last check has gone towards rent and into our medical bank account...

xx

I started my hypnobabies classes last week, so I have all the CDs. I can send them to you. I have class tonight so I won't have time today, but send me a PM to remind me so I don't forget! (You know how our memories can be, lol).

So far I'm really enjoying the class and can keep you posted. The reason I ended up choosing hypnobabies over hypnobirthing is that you can still choose to walk, talk, etc with hypnobabies, which is important to me, especially the mobility.

Hey, I'd love to know what you learn/discuss in those classes We haven't got any classes available around here...Not much round here really!!

I'll PM you my MSN, if you'd like to try and send the CDs like that too?

xx

 

[nightkd]

Had my first MW appointment today, I'm still really pleased with our choice (not that we had much of a choice as there are only a couple of independent midwives in the area!)...the lady is really friendly and it felt a lot more relaxed and chatty rather than waiting for ages in a waiting room then being 'filed' almost, like I felt at the OBGYNs! Didn't feel so judged for my decisions etc either! It's just a nice change

She did say I should be eating more (and I thought I was eating too much... ) and getting more protein. That was about it! She measured me, listened to Bean's heartbeat (and got a nice hard kick!! ) and said my BP is good. Got my next appointment in 3 weeks.

She did say there was a trace of protein in my urine, any idea what that could mean? She said she wasn't worried as my pee was quite concentrated...I'm just curious!

Anyway, got 3 books from her 'library' to read...just some natural birthing books - including a Lamaze book..

xx

 

[Celesse]

Morning ladies.
Been having owies since 12ish, and definitely contractions since 1am. At first I wasn't 100% sure was real thing as I thought maybe was cos I needed the loo or something. I have been unable to sleep between them since 4am and they are currently 7 minutes apart lasting approx 1min.

Trying to stay up and mobile. Hopefully I won't need to call for the midwife until the morning lot come on duty at which point I won't have to do much fighting with the MAU staff as I can just tell them to send my own midwife out to "negotiate", being that I am now 42 weeks without having had a well being scan. The plan would be same now whether hospital or home, for me to labour naturally and respond to any problems.

And my cat, who had kittens last year is being very sweet. I think she understands what is going on and is being sympathetic to me.