How many of you had a completely natural birth?

[xxClaire_24xx]

As for opting for a section I think it should be thought about a little more as when we were talking to a woman in neonatal she had lost a baby previously as she couldnt get in for an emergency section as all the theatre were in use and 2 out of the 5 getting done at the time had opted for a section just because, (she looked into and filed complaints and thats why she knew) but then again some people might be afraid to give birth naturally, its all very complicated lol x

That isnt just because then, it is due to medical history and also most likely psychological reasons, the woman in neonatal I mean. And people being scared is again psychological reasons.

sorry it might have came out wrong she lost a baby the 1st time cause she couldnt get into theatre to have a section as there was no space left xx

 

[Tasha]

sorry it might have came out wrong she lost a baby the 1st time cause she couldnt get into theatre to have a section as there was no space left xx

Yes, and losing a baby the 1st time would deffo count as a medical reason hun.

 

[xxClaire_24xx]

sorry it might have came out wrong she lost a baby the 1st time cause she couldnt get into theatre to have a section as there was no space left xx

Yes, and losing a baby the 1st time would deffo count as a medical reason hun.

lol def have missed things this time her baby was born natural and went to NICU and she was just telling me about her 1st time, but I def think that it still doesnt matter how a baby gets her as long as its safely xx

 

[Tasha]

lol def have missed things this time her baby was born natural and went to NICU and she was just telling me about her 1st time, but I def think that it still doesnt matter how a baby gets her as long as its safely xx

Ahhh, I miss read. I thought she had picked to section just because Okay well, the thing is they would not of disclosed the reasons someone else was having a section to her, it is against confidentialty rules so I would take the 2 out of 5 thing with a pinch of salt hun. Even with a complaint, they can not legally tell you why other people were having a section.

 

[toddlerandpip]

It is true that people can choose to have saections though, with no real medical need.

 

[wigglywoo]

For me, having a birth free of medical intervention is very important. I have read and researched to make sure I know my rights so I can ensure that this happens.

Last time I felt I had no choice over where or how to give birth. I now know that I did have a choice and that I was perfectly within my rights to exercise that choice. I wish that I had known then what I know now, as my birth experience would have been so different. I would not have had two midwives holding my legs in the stirrups because I refused to keep them there, I would not have had pethadine or gas and air which I felt was forced on me, I would not have had vaginal examinations, I would not have been on my back on a continuous monitor because I would know that continuous monitoring has not been proven to improve outcomes over occasional doppler usage and because I would know that laying on your back is the worst position to try to birth in.

My unnecessary episiotomy scar still causes me pain at times over 7 years on (she wasn't big or stuck and I didn't have an instrumental delivery, the episiotomy and resulting stitches were totally unnecessary). I feel that I was robbed of the birth I should have had by interventions which were not necessary. It was a scary, threatening experience and not at all empowering as it should be.

So no, I do not believe that a healthy baby at the end of it is all that matters and I hate that in our society it has almost become a mantra spoken so that women will accept what has happened to them. I think that saying 'well, at least you got a healthy baby' is insulting and is belittling women's feelings about their experiences. I for one would never utter those words as you don't know whether that woman is suffering or has suffered PND due to her birth experience.

 

[cowboys angel]

^^ I agree

I of course would have agreed to anything to get a healthy baby...IF something went wrong.

But I am very glad I got my all natural birth....though I would've liked the DOCTORS to be there....lol

 

[bigbetty]

For me, having a birth free of medical intervention is very important. I have read and researched to make sure I know my rights so I can ensure that this happens.

Last time I felt I had no choice over where or how to give birth. I now know that I did have a choice and that I was perfectly within my rights to exercise that choice. I wish that I had known then what I know now, as my birth experience would have been so different. I would not have had two midwives holding my legs in the stirrups because I refused to keep them there, I would not have had pethadine or gas and air which I felt was forced on me, I would not have had vaginal examinations, I would not have been on my back on a continuous monitor because I would know that continuous monitoring has not been proven to improve outcomes over occasional doppler usage and because I would know that laying on your back is the worst position to try to birth in.

My unnecessary episiotomy scar still causes me pain at times over 7 years on (she wasn't big or stuck and I didn't have an instrumental delivery, the episiotomy and resulting stitches were totally unnecessary). I feel that I was robbed of the birth I should have had by interventions which were not necessary. It was a scary, threatening experience and not at all empowering as it should be.

So no, I do not believe that a healthy baby at the end of it is all that matters and I hate that in our society it has almost become a mantra spoken so that women will accept what has happened to them. I think that saying 'well, at least you got a healthy baby' is insulting and is belittling women's feelings about their experiences. I for one would never utter those words as you don't know whether that woman is suffering or has suffered PND due to her birth experience.

When I ask does it matter as long as your baby is healthy, what I mean is if, despite planning a drug and intervention free birth, you feel the need to have some sort of pain relief - be it gas and air or an epidural - would you still feel you had lost out? I mean by choosing yourself during labour, not being forced to as you were in your experience.

I believe a woman's birth experience should be what she wants it to be - unless intervention is needed because of risk to baby, mother or both.

A woman shouldn't be forced into anything. I was constantly monitored throughout my labour because I was induced and hooked up to the drip - but I was allowed to move around as much as I wanted (and as far as the wires allowed). I chose to have pethedine and gas and air, but I don't think I would have them again because in all honestly I could have coped without them.

I'm sorry that you, and so many other women, aren't given the information to make your own choices during labour. I think I would be extremely upset if I felt pressured into doing things i didn't feel comfortable with.

 

[KatieB]

Of course if you feel that you had totally unnecessary intervention during labour and you didn't feel able to voice your concerns then that is terrible, I've heard of a lot of women who felt like this on B and B. However for those of us who had no choice re intervention and who say that we didn't care about what means we had go by to ensure a healthy baby, I personally don't feel like I had to "accept" anything, I just feel so lucky to have been in a position where me and my baby were ok. No, it wasn't as I envisioned but then as we all know, anything can happen. I didn't feel robbed of an experience because I didn't have a "natural" birth but I can understand that other women could and would feel this way. Of course I hope if I'm lucky enough to ever have another baby there won't be complications like baby being back to back and not budging and hopefully I won't have to go through such a gruelling time but I went in with an open mind last time and will again. I do agree that people shouldn't always utter such platitudes to women though - as you say, you don't know the situation.

 

[wigglywoo]

I think IF something were to go wrong and intervention could be proved to be needed and that you were given all of the information that was required to make an informed choice then that is different to being coerced into having certain things/being in certain positions because it made the lives of the people 'caring' for you easier.

This time I am prepared and at home will not feel scared and threatened. I am in my environment and the people who come to attend me are there as invited guests or they would not be there at all. In my own environment and being well informed, I will be able to remain in control of my own birth and avoid the interventions which made my previous experience so awful.

If a woman chooses to have pain relief, that is different to having it forced on her by 'well meaning' hospital staff. The important thing in my opinion is choice and that the choice is well informed. My informed choice is to not have any pain relief this time (except water!).

 

[KatieB]

I think IF something were to go wrong and intervention could be proved to be needed and that you were given all of the information that was required to make an informed choice then that is different to being coerced into having certain things/being in certain positions because it made the lives of the people 'caring' for you easier.

This time I am prepared and at home will not feel scared and threatened. I am in my environment and the people who come to attend me are there as invited guests or they would not be there at all. In my own environment and being well informed, I will be able to remain in control of my own birth and avoid the interventions which made my previous experience so awful.

If a woman chooses to have pain relief, that is different to having it forced on her by 'well meaning' hospital staff. The important thing in my opinion is choice and that the choice is well informed. My informed choice is to not have any pain relief this time (except water!).

Sorry you had such an awful experience the first time, I hope you have a wonderful home birth x

 

[Linzi]

I did depends on if you count 3rd stage though as i had the injection. I loved it 10 x more than my first labour xx

 

[Linzi]

It is funny how we all see things differently, birthing and our thoughts on it are as individual as we are. For instance some of you have said that all that matters is that you have a healthy baby at the end of it, and whilst of course I agree, it is because at the end of two labours I have not not had a healthy live screaming baby that for me it matters a lot what my birth experience is like. Sometimes all you are left with is memories, and well to me it is important those memories are as close to perfect as they can be given the circumstances. Like my labour with Honey was great, my labour with Riley Rae was perfect and for me it makes looking back that little easier, it made my time with them better. Any future babies the labour experience would be important too because you just never know what might happen, I know that is morbid but thought it might give some of you a little insight in to why it can be important.

Must agree... ofc a healthy baby at the end is the most important thing, but its not the ONLY important thing.

I was severely let down I feel, still recovering emotionally from the birth and will be for some time id imagine... but it makes it so much easier that she is here and ok. xx

 

[cowboys angel]

^^I agree. I may have got the natural birth I wanted, but it was very dramatic and was insane. My LO was in the hospital for a bit after I was released. But knowing baby is home with me, and okay makes it much easier cuz, well, she is here and okay.

I really want another natural birth if I get pregnant again, but I am worried about a similar pregnancy/labor/birth....I am actually scared for a repeat.

 

[Tasha]

I really want another natural birth if I get pregnant again, but I am worried about a similar pregnancy/labor/birth....I am actually scared for a repeat.

One birth to the next can be soooooooooo different. I hope you get the calm, uncomplicated, natural birth you want

 

[cowboys angel]

Aww thanks, me too.

 

[xxClaire_24xx]

lol def have missed things this time her baby was born natural and went to NICU and she was just telling me about her 1st time, but I def think that it still doesnt matter how a baby gets her as long as its safely xx

Ahhh, I miss read. I thought she had picked to section just because Okay well, the thing is they would not of disclosed the reasons someone else was having a section to her, it is against confidentialty rules so I would take the 2 out of 5 thing with a pinch of salt hun. Even with a complaint, they can not legally tell you why other people were having a section.

ive put in a complaint on 2 occasions and was told that on the 1st occasion too long to explain 2nd occasion had to wait til the Sat instead of that day (a fri when I had a scan) that there was already 6 people booked in for sections and that I even although I was an emergency had to wait to 1st place in the morning and that was in a letter from the NHS as I had asked if the lack of blood flow and not having the section that day was anything to do with some of Ellie health conditions hmmm thats annoyed me now as you are correct that is against rules eh

 

[xxClaire_24xx]

For me, having a birth free of medical intervention is very important. I have read and researched to make sure I know my rights so I can ensure that this happens.

Last time I felt I had no choice over where or how to give birth. I now know that I did have a choice and that I was perfectly within my rights to exercise that choice. I wish that I had known then what I know now, as my birth experience would have been so different. I would not have had two midwives holding my legs in the stirrups because I refused to keep them there, I would not have had pethadine or gas and air which I felt was forced on me, I would not have had vaginal examinations, I would not have been on my back on a continuous monitor because I would know that continuous monitoring has not been proven to improve outcomes over occasional doppler usage and because I would know that laying on your back is the worst position to try to birth in.

My unnecessary episiotomy scar still causes me pain at times over 7 years on (she wasn't big or stuck and I didn't have an instrumental delivery, the episiotomy and resulting stitches were totally unnecessary). I feel that I was robbed of the birth I should have had by interventions which were not necessary. It was a scary, threatening experience and not at all empowering as it should be.

So no, I do not believe that a healthy baby at the end of it is all that matters and I hate that in our society it has almost become a mantra spoken so that women will accept what has happened to them. I think that saying 'well, at least you got a healthy baby' is insulting and is belittling women's feelings about their experiences. I for one would never utter those words as you don't know whether that woman is suffering or has suffered PND due to her birth experience.

this makes sense I too ended up losing 5 pints of blood needed 5 blood transfusions and my bladder is ruined and I may need to get some cut away cause of the section I had but and my spinal wore ogg half way through and I felt EVERYTHING, I am now petrified from any DRs and any other medical treatment I need and I also attend counselling for this too in my mind thats nothing compared to the fact that we have Ellie here and she got here safely but I do respect what you are saying we all have different opinions

 

[xxClaire_24xx]

I think IF something were to go wrong and intervention could be proved to be needed and that you were given all of the information that was required to make an informed choice then that is different to being coerced into having certain things/being in certain positions because it made the lives of the people 'caring' for you easier.

This time I am prepared and at home will not feel scared and threatened. I am in my environment and the people who come to attend me are there as invited guests or they would not be there at all. In my own environment and being well informed, I will be able to remain in control of my own birth and avoid the interventions which made my previous experience so awful.

If a woman chooses to have pain relief, that is different to having it forced on her by 'well meaning' hospital staff. The important thing in my opinion is choice and that the choice is well informed. My informed choice is to not have any pain relief this time (except water!).

aw I hope you get that this time!!! I really do next time I want to try for sure a natural del but I already have drs saying oh you can opt for a section take it!! im like eh no thanks after having both kinds of births I will choose my own unless necessary again for a section!!!

 

[chuck]

I don't understand why it matters so much though
Why does it matter?
I think to most mums all that MATTERS is that they have their baby in their arms!

So, imo, no it doesn't matter how the yell our babies arrive into our arms as long as the baby is ok and not if we are ok in how they arrived!

...okay clearly you have never suffered birth trauma.

Wait until the most precious moments of your life are taken from you by people who are supposed to help you.

Wait until you spend months waiting to feel anything other than a vague sense of resentment towards the baby you were given and could be anyones.

I ma not trying to compare having a healthy baby but a shitty birth to the trauma suffered my mothers who do not have healthy babies or who birth angels BUT it is not enough to end up with a healthy baby no matter what.

Pregnancy ad parenthood is the most selfless thing you can ever do you you are entitled to be selfish about the birth because it matters.