I feel awful

Discussion in 'TTC After A Loss' started by ReadynWaiting, Nov 18, 2011.

  1. ReadynWaiting

    ReadynWaiting Mom to DS & DD, ttc #3

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    My husband just told me that a second set of our friends are pregnant. My stomach dropped and then I went to the bathroom to have a little cry. I'm so happy for them but I have this cloud of sadness and jealousy looming over me that I can't kick. What is killing me is that they got pregnant the first month trying. We've been pregnant twice this year both ending badly. Looks like I'm throwing my own pity party! What's wrong with me?
     
  2. twinkle2

    twinkle2 Cautiously preg w #2

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    OMG don't feel awful, every time I hear someone around me is pregnant I feel like someone has physically kicked me in the stomach, i often go off and have a little cry too. Don't feel bad just pick yourself up and stay positive, it will be your turn soon. xxx
     
  3. korink26

    korink26 Well-Known Member

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    Our 3 good friends are all due in May, 1 of them not trying, so i totally understand!! I'm excited for them and to have some babies in our little circle, but yet I feel so sad for us that it hasn't happened, even though we started trying wwwwaaayyyy before they even thought about babies.
    It has to happen sooner or later though for us, right?? XOXO hun
     
  4. ReadynWaiting

    ReadynWaiting Mom to DS & DD, ttc #3

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    My husband has been great and positive but I'm having a hard time with it. I don't usually suffer from jealousy so this is making my mood worse. I want to be unconditionally happy for them not a big crybaby. You go from the high of getting your bfp, to the devastating pain of losing a pregnancy, to trying to claw your way back to a positive, upbeat attitude back down to the devastation. I don't like rollercoasters and want to get off this ride! Sorry for the rant just need to get rid of the negativity. Thanks for listening ladies.
     
  5. cloud9

    cloud9 Guest

    i know exactly what you mean, it seems like there's nothing i can do to get rid of the gut wrenching feeling i get! and it makes me feel so guilty, especially when its a close friend/relative even though you are happy for them you're not entirely feeling it inside its soooo hard to pick yourself up and keep going. many of my friends and family are now pregnant with their 2nd child in the time we've been trying. i used to over-analyse and get so upset that it hasnt happened for us yet, it just seems to be heartache and one thing after the other at the moment with everything not just pregnancy! (or lack of it!) i just hope theres a light at the end of this very long [email protected] tunnel! ! sorry for the rant! i just wanted to say you are not alone with feelings like this! sorry for your losses :hugs:
     
  6. Annie77

    Annie77 Cautiously expecting

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    I remember feeling just like this after my 1st miscarriage when my cousin announced her pregnancy (due date was one week after mine). Also when I had the ectopic I felt a bit horrible about our friends who also had a wee accident but can't be bothered with the kids they already have.

    Hang in there - have a pity party, you are entitled to it. Then when you are finished, paint on a smile and move on. Why shouldn't you have a good cry and feel sorry for yourself. Losing a baby is an emotional issue and there is no-one who hasn't had a loss that will understand.

    Just remember 3rd time lucky!
    Annie
    x
     
  7. ReadynWaiting

    ReadynWaiting Mom to DS & DD, ttc #3

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    I'm sorry for your losses and your long road to a healthy baby. I have family telling me to project positivity and that's what I will get in return but I really am struggling right now. I know our time will come but I truly didn't think it would be this difficult. Good luck on your journey.
     
  8. ReadynWaiting

    ReadynWaiting Mom to DS & DD, ttc #3

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    Great attitude Annie! 3rd times a charm, guaranteed.
     

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