I know I'm probably being silly, but...

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by lori, Jan 30, 2011.

  1. lori

    lori Mom to Simon & Oliver

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    I can't help but feel that my LO prefers other people over me. He smiles and laughs like crazy when anyone else so much as looks at him (dad, grandparents, complete strangers) but I have to work like crazy to get a single smile out of him :cry: It makes me so sad. What am I doing wrong? Why doesn't he love the person who spends the most time with him? Maybe I'm expecting too much, but I love him more than I could ever love anyone else, so why does he seem to love everyone else more than me?
     
  2. babyfromgod

    babyfromgod Mummy of 2 boys

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    Sometimes my LO does this too, it just depends on his mood. Of course he loves you hun your his mummy. Maybe he is just used to seeing you all the time that when he sees a new face he gets excited? xx
     
  3. minties

    minties Complete

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    Thomas is like that too, just today he gave my aunt about 6 huge smiles in a row (he's only met her once before).

    She hands him back to me and he cries!

    I don't take it personally though, our LO's are too little to be doing it out of love or spite. It could even be a natural reaction to show a stranger that they are something to be loved and not hurt, so by smiling at them they secure their own safety. They know they don't have to do that with their mummies.
     
  4. amygwen

    amygwen Mom to Kenny & Gwendoline

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    Kenneth was like that a lot in the beginning and I had the same sort of feelings about him liking other people more than me, because he would never smile around me - it took a lot and he would just ALWAYS cry! Someone once told me though I should feel happy he's like that around me because he feels comfortable enough to cry, smile, scream when he's around me, so since then I've always felt that way about it. It's hard though, don't feel like your LO loves you less than anyone else, :hugs:
     
  5. AlwaysPraying

    AlwaysPraying Mom of two!

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    I agree with the others. I notice myself being very quiet around my boy. I don't talk to him much. I beat myself up about that for a long time. But he is always so quiet. Like you said, I had to work so hard at laughs or smiles that I just stopped trying so hard. Very quickly I realized that this is who I am as a mom. I love to just BE with my boy. I love being together with him. I feel incredibly connected to him. Of course I talk and play with him a ton, don't get me wrong. But our default is more quiet. I adore that he can be with me and I don't need to entertain him. Like the other said, he's comfortable enough just being himself with me. When others go nutty to get smiles and all that I just know that I don't need to be a goof and that me just being me helps him be him.
     
  6. Lightworker

    Lightworker Well-Known Member

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    Awe sweets I think this is fairly common. My LO seems to smile and laugh more for my DH yet she spends all day with me feeding her, playing with her, holding her while she sleeps etc. If it makes you feel better, just rest assured that ultimately YOU are the one LO loves most.
     
  7. kangaroo

    kangaroo Crossing fingers

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    Yep, I could have written that myself!! My little one would even crawl over to others (like my mum!) before me....but rest assured, as 10 months, that's all changed and she's definitely more of a mummy's girl than ever! Sometimes they're just more interested in 'new' things and 'new' people - but that will soon change to realising that you are there constantly and you're their security- and it's lovely!!!! It will happen xx
     
  8. gaga

    gaga Active Member

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    i agree with others.
     
  9. lori

    lori Mom to Simon & Oliver

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    Thanks everyone :hugs: it's good to know I'm not the only one who's ever felt this way. I was just having a rotten day and I felt like I was getting the cold shoulder from Simon. Normally I can see the situation for what it is, but I started getting down on myself and it was a slippery slope. Your replies were much appreciated.
     
  10. kmac625

    kmac625 Mom to baby Clara

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    Glad you're feeling a bit better hun. :hugs: I just wanted to tell you that although my dd is great with smiling all of the time, it's not just special towards me (she's always smiling for me, my dh, the neighbours, everyone on the subway...you get the picture), she is so independent!!! She's always been perfectly happy to just play on her own on her play area (which is in my livingroom). She'll look at me lots and I talk to her lots, but she doesn't feel the need to be held all of the time and it kills me. Granted I love that I can get stuff done easier that way, but sometimes when I hear about babies who hate to be put down ever I get jealous because Clara loves to just be playing on her own more than cuddling. I know it doesn't mean anything, it's just her nature, but it still bothers me sometimes.
     

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