In-laws not bought anything for baby!

Discussion in 'Pregnancy - Second Trimester' started by alilou151, Jan 30, 2011.

  1. alilou151

    alilou151 Well-Known Member

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    Just wondered if your in-laws are helping towards the baby, not that I expect anything. My parents have bought quite alot because they are very excited & I am very grateful although I have bought most things myself. My in-laws seem excited about their 1st grandchild & are not superstitious about buying things but they havent even asked if we would like a moses basket, cot etc just thought it would be nice of them if they did.

    Thanks for some of the nice comments & support but I am entitled to my opinion & to be slated for that I am disgusted with! I won't be condemned for having thoughts of my own.
     
  2. miss cakes

    miss cakes Well-Known Member

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    same here the fob family have not even said congrats to me let alone offered to help with anything whatsoever the tight feckers i asked fob to help with pushchair costs the other week and all i got from him and his family is its my problem i better sort it out myself i have to say the C word comes to mind whenever i think of them grrrr! x
     
  3. Jess812

    Jess812 Jacob & Connor <3

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    im feeling a bit the same!! My in laws havent bought us anything or even offered!! I dont expect anything but i thought they would of atleast offered or wanted to get their first grand child something! My mum has bought loads!! did a huge xmas bag full of baby clothes, accessories an she is also buying us a baby bouncer :)
     
  4. Lizzeh

    Lizzeh Aurora <3

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    My in-laws already support my husbands upkeep and studies every month so they didn't get us a whole lot either, but I'd rather have it this way!
    My mum's also bought everything for the baby, pram and maxi cosi, crib etc.
    My mum in law did make one of those cute bells you hang on a necklace in silver for me, which is a great gift!
     
  5. Peril

    Peril Imogen Louise, my miracle

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    You still have a long way to go and if they are anything like some of my relatives they are a bit paranoid about buying things early. Just bide your time. I hope that they might surprise you
     
  6. Eleanor ace

    Eleanor ace Well-Known Member

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    Your inlaws may be superstitious- I know a lot of people who think we're crazy for having bought a travel system already and having it in the house. My parents haven't bought anything for the baby, but my brother died at 4 days old and they absolutely won't buy anything until there is a baby here. I hope that your Inlaws will surprise you, maybe when you are further on in your pregnancy or when baby is here.
     
  7. Mya209

    Mya209 Well-Known Member

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    Neither set of parents have really bought us anything, I don't really expect them to to be honest! Ive had some knitted things which i love and lots of hand me downs. my OH parents offered to give us 200 for a cot but we turned them down, hopefully they'll save it so we can put it into an account for baby's future. I'd hate to spend 200 on a cot, when it could be given to baby later on!
    But then again I wouldn't take any handout for the wedding either. That's just me.
     
  8. mumoffive

    mumoffive Well-Known Member

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    Well do what i do, dont expect anything from anyone and regard getting something as a bonus. Its lovely your family have bought you things. If you dont like your inlaws then regard them not buying you anything as a bonus! Then you will feel you dont owe them anything iykwim!
     
  9. AP

    AP Well-Known Member
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    I don't think anyones obliged to buy anything tbh but the parents. But that's just me :shrug: it's your choice to have children.

    Ours didn't offer until she was born, out of sheer guilt perhaps in our circumstances, but we had bought everything and we prided ourselves on the fact we supplied everything for our daughter. And we weren't made of money either :shrug:
     
  10. Chocciebutton

    Chocciebutton Well-Known Member

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    Ive never had anything bought for my 2 in the past, so I dont suppose it will be any different this time......I havent got anything as I got rid of it all as I wasnt supposed to be having anymore! My mum bought some clothes when they were born but thats it. My inlaws dont even mention my pregnancy, ask how I am or anything........I dont see them that often though so its not too bad, my mum lives abroad and my mother in law wont even look after our other 2 children when I give birth as she says Ive done it twice before, I dont need my husband !!!!!.........this is the only time she has said anything connected to me being pregnant
     
  11. bobblebot

    bobblebot Well-Known Member

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    better just forget about it, some people are just this way! I've always had buy everything for my kids...my parents are tightwads as have been my ex's parents and my now ex husband....rather be a single parent doing it alone rather than being continously dissapointed by selfish people.

    i also have to move house 2 month before baby due as landlord gave notice and i'm in a panic as finding somewhere is so hard and was thinking of movng near parents. They have a 3 bed housing association property for just 2 of them and they own a flat...was hoping they would offer let us stay in flat if nothing came up as a safety net.....at first said yes then decided no as would be too hard for them!!!! and somehow could mess with their council tax!!!!!!!! So decided not bother moving to be near family, what is the point still be all on my own at end of day! FAMILY!!!!!!!
     
  12. CharlieP

    CharlieP Mum to Charlie

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    To be honest I don't think anyone should be obliged to buy gifts for babies, whether they're relatives or not...if they buy something, thats great, if they don't then hey ho.
     
  13. miss cakes

    miss cakes Well-Known Member

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    true i never had anyone buy anything for my first 2 children i got it all myself my comments directed more towards FOB but i wouldnt expect anything from anyone else although it would be nice.........lol x
     
  14. CLH_X3

    CLH_X3 Love my two babies!

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    I totally agree, I don't expect anyone to buy me a gift if they do great! Helps me out tons! Everyone asks me what I want aswell so hopefully il get loads of stuff I need instead just clothes! (I swear my mums dressing my baby for the first 9 months lol) ..

    Tbh I am surprised at how many parents are not buying stuff, MIL has already said she will give us about £650 pounds and my parents have already bought about 100 on clothes/Blankets and they have offered to get us a maxi cosi car seat and all my bottles/sterilliser kit! Which I am really greatful for!! Spesh as my father is out of work atm due to a operation he has just had and another 1 he has to Have in a few months time, so there living on one wage atm!

    I must be really fortunate !
     
  15. special_kala

    special_kala love my bugs

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    i dont expect people to buy our baby stuff for us :shrug:

    and your only 23 weeks pregnant so a long way yet for people to buy stuff. if your parents have spent £1000 what else could there be to buy :dohh:
     
  16. CharlieP

    CharlieP Mum to Charlie

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    For sure! Thats not buying gifts - thats doing the right thing by your child - you should definitely expect the FOB to pay towards things you need for your baby! x
     
  17. miss cakes

    miss cakes Well-Known Member

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    yeah i know hes a shit! lol x
     
  18. harocat

    harocat Well-Known Member

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    Like most people said, you've still got a long way to go. Maybe they want to surprise you and are just waiting till you have a baby shower to give you your stuff? Some people wait till the last minute to give gifts anyways.

    I think it's unfair to expect a certain amount of gifts from someone, even a relative. Just because they make more than your parents doesn't mean they have the extra money to blow on gifts. (And £1000 worth of stuff won't leave too much for others to buy)
     
  19. Noodles

    Noodles Mummy to two boys!

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    I think I may have missed your point. Are you annoyed at your inlaws for not buying stuff for their first grandchild when you are only 23 weeks pregnant?

    If so, not only do you have ages to go, they may do what my inlaws did when I had my son which was not buy anything but gave us a nice cash sum when he was born (out of the blue). They may also be superstious and not want to jinx you (in a similar way to why most people keep their pregnancy a secret for 1st tri) or they may even see this as a right of passage, their son is not only a man but going to be a father and they want him to experience all aspects of becoming a parent which includes buying their child everything it needs.

    They have paid to raise their children and regardless of how much they earn or how many grandhildren they have you shouldn't expect them to pay anything towards yours. I'm not saying that it wouldn't be nice if they bourght something for your baby, but you shouldn't expect them to and get annoyed when they don't.
     
  20. alienbabe4321

    alienbabe4321 Mummy to gorgeous Louis

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    OMG! I would have replied with "So I got myself pregnant did I?" or "Fine. If it's my problem don't even bother trying to see MY child when it's born."

    This seems wrong to me and I hate men that have this kind of view. Grrr.
     

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