Inconceivable and beyond :-)

[2have4kids]

Hi everyone, Crystal congrats with team pink! Pass those stones & be done with it, how horrible is that, twins are enough to contend with. Those are lucky girls to have such a resilient mom!!!
Pussycat, if you're not going through a reproductive immunologist things can get difficult. I got my GP to prescribe prednisone, she'd only give me 5 & 10 at the time and then when I got to Brno got the fs to prescribe more. I don't think this is the right way to go about things but as you know I've felt pretty desperate these last few years.
The only other thing I'd recommend is staying off the high inflammation foods. If you're unsure what these are you can check with nutrition data.com. Wheat products ie bread, pasta, crackers, coffee, cereals and sugary things. Eat like a caveman, loads of veggies and clean proteins. Some people don't think eating habits effect your body but when you have arthritis like me or if you work out regularly, you will feel bloated and sore eating high inflammatory foods. Each time I go through a cycle I load up on Anti-inflammatory foods like salmon, turmeric (1-2 tspn in some milk is just as good as an Advil), ginger, hot peppers, etc. it was really easy to eat clean in Greece, Greek salad & fish were staple menu items. Only thing that was hard to say no to was the bread & tatziki (I die for this snack but I got sweet peas/carrots + tatziki instead). You have to decide what's right for you.

 

[dmama]

Hi ladies !
I am back from underground - had to get through the process and tww independent of the internet for my nerves' sake - so thank for understanding

Cali - congratulations! I bet you have twinkies!!!! I too had thought of California Conceptions, but alas, did not go there. Very nice betas!

Minxx- sorry for the outcome- this journey is not for the weak at all...and none of us here are weak...somehow, you and dh will find out what is the best way forward. it takes time to grieve the loss of your own dna - or partner's, however once you can take that time and complete the grieving process, the idea of being able to carry a child that IS your own, begins to become very much a better idea than not having a child at all, and then soon, you will put aside that the dna belonged once to someone else...it took me about 3 months to go through that process and a bit of wasted money on IUIs and an IVF as well....HUGS....

Leilani - Gosh...I do hope that all is well with the little one...I know that after a while, the betas do slow down, I hope that all will reveal itself to be fine in future scans...

Good luck to the ladies about to embark on a cycle---much baby dust to all of us!

AFM - I completed my frozen DE transfer. I did an eSET of a 5 day blast and the amazing thing is that I have 2 more blasts frozen! I never had a blast before, let alone anything to freeze. I am 7dpt5dt and got a bfp on a hpt, but remain very worried at this time, as I know anything can happen. Just trying to stay calm and pray for the best. Stepping away from the internet was for my sanity. Although I know that the worry never goes away....

Happy Thanksgiving to those of us who celebrate it!

 

[Pussycat1]

Crystal, 2 little pink ones, how lovely!
Thanks for all the feedback ladies, I've asked the question about the dose of steroids and asked for my prescription so let's wait and see. Lots of clinics seem to prescribe 5mg, so surely that must have some effect?
2have thanks for the tips on food, I have actually changed my diet recently and eat very little processed food, sugars or caffeine. I eat loads of veg and pulses so hopefully that will make a difference.
Also been trying to find info on NKC and CD56 as no one can tell me how bad my level (16.7%) is.
Happy thanksgiving to all those celebrating! x

 

[2have4kids]

dmama, congrats on your bfp! That`s the first ste^p, I know when you`ve had losses that its hard to get excited but you`ve jumped through the first hoop, for that we
Pussycat, maybe Crystal can help with that, I have 3 other immune issues, no nkc`s. Hopefully you can get answers.
Typeing with mittens, just back from the Christmas party at work and going home. Have a great weekend all!

 

[Pussycat1]

Dmama, welcome back and congrats on the test! It's natural to worry when you've been through so much but hopefully this is your time! xx

 

[Leilani]

Brilliant news dmama!

From what I understand Pussycat, is that a low dose of steroids are sometimes given for about 5 days, just to aid implantation, rather than for immune issues. Obviously with the whole ethics of trialling things on pregnant ladies, it is often hard to find actual evidence of what may or may not work. My Ob is calling my 20mg "not a high" dose. I've also inadvertently been following an immune friendly diet, so who knows if that is helping me, but it certainly isn't doing any harm!

An update from me - we had our first proper scan with the Ob on Tuesday, and after battling with my gassy bowel, she was able to get a good look at bubba, who had a great heart-rate (too many numbers on the screen for me to pick which it was), and was measuring spot on 9w5d, so that was a relief, also the yolk sac is now a much more normal size, and the Ob wasn't even slightly worried about it, nor was she bothered about the ultra-slowing down of the hcg rise. Next scan is our 12 week chromosomal screening (doing the bloods on Monday for the combined screening), I think once we get through that hurdle, I might start to believe this could be really happening!

 

[2have4kids]

Leilani congrats on hearing the heaetbeat
I agree with you, I think 20 mg is a low dose, my friend has inflammatory issues not related to infertility and she's on 40mg. My gut reaction when my doc put me on 10/15 was that she was protecting her arse. When they aren't in the know with immuno reproductive issues they don't want to risk anything.

 

[crystal443]

Leilani explained it perfectly, 5mgs is to aid implantation and is NOT an immune related dosage my dosage of 20mgs was a low dose but I was also doing Neupogen, IVIG and 500 mls of intralipids. I see two reproductive immunigists, one in Sydney and the other here in Melbourne that did the infusions etc. just be wary of Reprofit and immune treatments because they do prefer you see a doctor seperately for immune issues if your able to take a higher dose then try that, if you have known NKC in your blood then they will be even higher in your uterus My only issues were NKC and the MTHFR gene which is just a problem absorbing folate. Best of luck

 

[Pussycat1]

Hi ladies, thanks for all the feedback. They won't give me higher than 5mg so I have to go with what they say. It's the first time Ive had anything other than stims or oestrogen so figure it's got to be better than nothing. It's seems to he a really common dose so we'll see. How's everyone doing? x

 

[Minno]

Hey ladies. Congrats Crystal on team pink! Lovely news
Congrats Dmama too. Natural to be cautious but try to enjoy it if you can, you've waites a long time for this.
Hope everyone else is doing well. Party season - yay!
Afm, about to go to notary to get DH consent form for FET signed as I have to take it with me to prague. Will book scan on Friday for jan, and then it's wait for af. If she arrives this week I'm waiting until next af until I start the meds but if she doesn't show for a couple of weeks I'll be in a quandary. I think I want all the hols out the way because I need to go for scans etx and want to make sure clinic is open!
Pussycat, I was told by the consultant that he was giving me 5-10mg prednisolone to aid implantation xxx

 

[MinxyChick]

Hi Ladies,

Pussycat - The second time I bought my drugs from Asda, yes Asda. They need an original prescription. Initially I just phoned them up for a quote to compare prices, they are alot cheaper than fertility2u but fertility2u will accept an e-mail script from Serum. Asda don't charge mark up on fertility drugs.

Crystal - congratulations.
Dnama - congratulations on the BFP.
Leilani - Scan sounds excellent, onto 12w!

Hi to everyone.

Cali, Sienna - Have you told any friends / family you're doing double donation? Do you intend to tell your child? I'm pro telling but I guess my greatest fear is my future child will not forgive me for using an anonymous donor and feel they have no roots. I need to look into but I think in the UK all double donation is donor embryos from families. I'm not sure if that's a bit odd plus I don't like the UK clinics much.

Thank you everyone for the messages.

Been having a bit of a time out from everything, DH has really been struggling. 3 weeks ago his Nan died, the pressure of work & everything else has really got to him. He's been signed off work, given a low dose of anti-depressants and starts counselling today.
It's been such a tough few weeks, the realisation of not having a half bio child has been so hard. I think when we had hope we moved on more easily and now everything has built up. I feel a bit better today and am going to sort out some councelling with my old UK clinic as I'm still covered by them. Tough times. I'm very much in mourning for everything I've lost and what could have / should have been.

 

[dmama]

So sorry you are going through this. It is natural to mourn the loss of bio child. However, I know once you are pregnant, you and dh will be so incredibly happy that it will not seem as dismal as it seems now.

Hi Ladies,

Pussycat - The second time I bought my drugs from Asda, yes Asda. They need an original prescription. Initially I just phoned them up for a quote to compare prices, they are alot cheaper than fertility2u but fertility2u will accept an e-mail script from Serum. Asda don't charge mark up on fertility drugs.

Crystal - congratulations.
Dnama - congratulations on the BFP.
Leilani - Scan sounds excellent, onto 12w!

Hi to everyone.

Cali, Sienna - Have you told any friends / family you're doing double donation? Do you intend to tell your child? I'm pro telling but I guess my greatest fear is my future child will not forgive me for using an anonymous donor and feel they have no roots. I need to look into but I think in the UK all double donation is donor embryos from families. I'm not sure if that's a bit odd plus I don't like the UK clinics much.

Thank you everyone for the messages.

Been having a bit of a time out from everything, DH has really been struggling. 3 weeks ago his Nan died, the pressure of work & everything else has really got to him. He's been signed off work, given a low dose of anti-depressants and starts counselling today.
It's been such a tough few weeks, the realisation of not having a half bio child has been so hard. I think when we had hope we moved on more easily and now everything has built up. I feel a bit better today and am going to sort out some councelling with my old UK clinic as I'm still covered by them. Tough times. I'm very much in mourning for everything I've lost and what could have / should have been.

 

[2have4kids]

Minxy, it doesn't help with all that you've been through and moving into winter and having the loss of his nan, work is unrelenting - you guys are in my thoughts.

I'm with you, I think it's wise to tell the child about their roots. We have so much more hurt to contend with when we keep secrets. Counselling with 2 different professionals as well as the adoption seminar with the two host social workers has helped us understand that children do best knowing all there is to know about their roots. The truth always comes out anyway and if you've lied to them about who they are/where they've come from it'll etch into a deep seated wound on them and on your integrity will be greatly compromised. It'll def cause fractures in your relationship with a child. Whereas if you can explain in age appropriate ways what their conception was all about, they'll appreciate the efforts you've made to have them. They may act out when frustrated ie the social workers said that at the age of 7 & 8 when a child is from a divorce, when they're from donor egg, when they're from adoptive roots they'll use whatever they can to hurt you ie 'you're not my real mom' or in the case of a divorce 'I hate you, I want to go live with dad', it's your job as that child's rock to reinforce over and over that you're glad they are your child and you love them no matter what. They call adoptive children 'special needs' because they'll always deal with this and ignorant statements from their classmates and other adults so you need to do your homework in how to take care of their concerns and reassure them constantly that they're loved.
-I loved that speech from the social worker. I know we can do that for our kids. We have so much love to give. I believe the truth is the best way forward.

 

[MinxyChick]

I couldn't agree more 2have. Looking forward to happier times.

I did look into epigenetics, thanks for the info ladies. Very interesting stuff, I really do believe us as the mothers (carrying), influence the baby. I mentioned it to DH and he was already aware but hadn't considered it against our situation.

 

[dmama]

Hi ladies...beta more than doubled! I don't think I will get a scan until 8 weeks. They ordered another beta for next week and then my OB won't do scans until 8 weeks. I am actually okay waiting.

Hugs all!!!!

 

[Pussycat1]

Hey ladies, thanks for all your thoughts on Prednisone. Yes the 5mg is to aid implantation and to be honest that does seem to be my problem. I feel a little less concerned about it as I finally found some decent info on what the % CD57 might mean. Dr Beers seemed to say anything over 18% could cause issues, mine is 16.7. Anyway I could stress over this and worry but that's only going to make things worse so I'm just going to get on with it. Got then sending hard copies of prescriptions so all fine. Minxy, I'll try Asda, thanks! I've actually had fertility drugs from them before. I found a good website that was cheaper than fertility2u so will compare.
Minxy sorry you've been having such a tough time. When we moved to using DE we had implication councelling which was useful and we talked a lot about what we'd tell any child. They pointed us in the direction of https://www.dcnetwork.org who have a whole range of age appropriate story books and ways of telling a child. It's all so new the options that are open to us. Epigenetics is so interesting and so reassuring for us. Good luck with your next steps. xx

 

[dmama]

ladies = anyone using PIO shots? the actual shots do not hurt much, but what is bothering me now is that at random times throughout the day, the areas where I give the shots start to get sore and itch a bit. I have been using the heat pad and it helps for the period of time. Anyway, just looking for suggestions.
Have a good weekend all....good luck to us! Baby Dust!!!

 

[Pussycat1]

Dmama, meant to say, great doubling numbers! Never done POI but I have heard other ladies say similar. x

 

[Leilani]

ladies = anyone using PIO shots? the actual shots do not hurt much, but what is bothering me now is that at random times throughout the day, the areas where I give the shots start to get sore and itch a bit. I have been using the heat pad and it helps for the period of time. Anyway, just looking for suggestions.
Have a good weekend all....good luck to us! Baby Dust!!!

Hahaha, I shouldn't laugh, but I got caught rubbing my bum yesterday when my right buttock started to itch!

Be careful that you are injecting in your upper outer quadrants, as on one of my unsuccessful cycles I think I injected into, or close to a nerve, as a couple of months later I had terrible calf pain, and the physio couldn't really work out how I'd injured myself, but after I told him about the butt jabs, he gave me some different exercises to do, and whilst it's still not perfect, it's a lot better.

I did try massage oil and a little hand held wooden massage thing for a while, but that just made the area more bruised, I then read that the solid lumps we get are supposed to be there as they are used as slow release pockets of progesterone!

I did my last PIO shot this morning, so now I'm going to have the delightful Crinone clumps to contend with, rather than the lumpy/itchy butt!

 

[sienna]

Cali, Sienna - Have you told any friends / family you're doing double donation? Do you intend to tell your child? I'm pro telling but I guess my greatest fear is my future child will not forgive me for using an anonymous donor and feel they have no roots. I need to look into but I think in the UK all double donation is donor embryos from families. I'm not sure if that's a bit odd plus I don't like the UK clinics much.

Thank you everyone for the messages.

Been having a bit of a time out from everything, DH has really been struggling. 3 weeks ago his Nan died, the pressure of work & everything else has really got to him. He's been signed off work, given a low dose of anti-depressants and starts counselling today.
It's been such a tough few weeks, the realisation of not having a half bio child has been so hard. I think when we had hope we moved on more easily and now everything has built up. I feel a bit better today and am going to sort out some councelling with my old UK clinic as I'm still covered by them. Tough times. I'm very much in mourning for everything I've lost and what could have / should have been.

hi minxy we haven't told family and friends yet and not sure what we will tell them yet. We do plan to tell the child though in an age appropriate way, so that it's something they have always known. From the reading I've done children/adults struggle when they have been lied to and it turns their world upside down. Whereas if they know from a very young age they accept it. It took us time to come to terms with, the counseling sessions should help.