International bumps to be!

[dusty_sheep]

Nothing new here. I know it's not good, but I'm still telling myself that I might be pregnant despite the 2 BFNs I mean, it's 10 days past ov. - what does a test at this time mean anyway.

Didn't take any more tests. My gyn will take a blood test in about a week and then we know for sure whether I'm preg or not. There was only one follicle that was big enough, so the chances to get preg were not that great to begin with.

What really stresses me out about not being pregnant is, that another cycle of "trying" also means another cycle of possible failing. You know, it's not only that even if everything goes alright with DTD, there still is the chance that you don't get preg. But also: for some reason we've also had problems with getting ... err... DH's little friend to cooperate - and I'm so scared of knowing that this would be "the" day to BD, but things not working out for us. (Or even worse: Hubby saying something like "I'm not in the mood today - let's try another day". Great when another cycle of being stuffed with hormones passes by for reasons like that!)

 

[Madrid98]

Hi dusty!!! My dh already knows he knew from week 5 but he's trying to ignore the fact & doing like nothing just to be in the safe side. I don't think is working for him though. Yesterday we went shopping & I was looking at the sizes if a pair of trousers from Desigual(you may know the brand, they have beautiful, colourful clothes). & as I was telling him I want to buy this trousers he said to me: are you sure? They may not fit you soon when you'll be bigger. Lol. So as you can see he's already coming to terms with it.

He's so funny sometimes!!!!!

I feel you have also the added pressure from your dh little one not cooperating but you can only try to hide every symptom from him & hope for the best. I'm sure the ttc pressure it's getting to him as well & thus he's not even getting there.

Ttc is more complicated than we think.

Xx

 

[Madrid98]

Stuckinoki where are you? We haven't heard from you in days? Are you reading us? Hope you're ok & busy with lovely exciting stuff!!!

Xx

 

[mzswizz]

Dusty-well maybe shorter cycles will be good for us but at the same time im not sure because then OV will be so close to AF so it will be very hard to know. And wouldnt that mean a shorter LP? ugh i just need to relax and let my body handle itself.

Madrid-atleast your dh is finally coming to terms with the pregnancy so thats good. Hopefully you will be able to get that nice big bump you deserve. Where did you find all the negative results for cod liver oil because i want to show dh so i can have proof that i shouldnt take them anymore. All we see is positive i havent read anything bad so thats why dh wants me to keep taking them. He thinks its trying to fix those long AF cycles etc

AFM, i spoke with dh because i was worried about this whole new shorter cycles. He helped me to calm down and relax but i just feel like i should temp and do all sorts of things. He was telling me that maybe my body is just trying to adjust to a cycle and its getting there slowly. Maybe he's right oh well all i can do is go through AF and then DTD until a BFP comes.

 

[dusty_sheep]

Madrid - aren't men just great! They push away every thought on pregnancy - but the moment it's about money, they are back and tell you not to buy things you might not wear for very long

And yes, I feel a lot of pressure myself and it's so hard to not tell hubby about me knowing exactly when it'd be time to BD. We agreed on me not telling him, though - because that would be extra pressure for him and basically a 100 % guarantee that nothing will work when it should. I first thought this would be because secretely, my DH maybe doesn't want another child - but I read many couples deal with the same problems, so yeah... must be the pressure that makes things difficult.

Hopefully we get to BD tonight. Not because it'd be time or something, but just for fun. Yesterday it was one of those days when it wouldn't work for us, but I was not exactly in the mood so that might have had something to do with it.

 

[ChrissiK]

Just a quick hallo to everybody from Germany!

Two choice quotes from my mother:
"You need to relax about conceiving, just stop worrying and paying attention and it will happen"

"You can't expect to be skinny and get pregnant" (I'm about 10lbs lighter then when I had my kids)

Aaaaaargh. Why did I ever tell her that we are TTC - big mistake in a moment of weakness!!!

Hope you are all enjoying your weekend - I will dance & party tonight to get my mind off the BFN!

 

[mzswizz]

Chrissi-my mom tells me the same thing. Its just easier said than done and thats why they havent figured out.

Ok update ladies, Now i have noticed that i am having sharp pains like af cramps which is not normal for me and also i went to change the tampon and its reddish/brown blood but mostly brown i guess you can say onlyW on the tip of the tampon. I havent started a flow yet but i marked today as cd1. It looks like its going to stop though because when i wipe there is completely nothig on the tp. Any clue what this might be? Could it be possible its IB and because we DTD last night, it kinda pushed more blood out? I know when i was pregnan the last time, after sex i would have bleeding. Ugh here i go again giving myself high hopes.

 

[dusty_sheep]

mzswizz - it might be either, actually. I have no experience with IB, so no big help from me here

Chrissi - well, that's what I get to hear as well. Join the club.

 

[mzswizz]

Dusty-I know the finding out part is the scary part. In my heart, Im hoping soooo bad that its IB and a BFP is on the way but you never know. Also Im having quick sharp pains and they feel like the last time when I was pregnant but that can just be me recieving cramps again from AF which means cramps are back as a symptom for AF. All I can do is wait and see what happens. FXed

 

[Madrid98]

I think it could also being from bd'ing or ib but not af as it's too early. You only had a faint opk the other day. Fx'd is ib!!!!

 

[mzswizz]

Im thinking that if i have two lines especially when one line was faint but noticeably there, then it shouldnt be AF correct? I dont know. Im just hoping for the best. I never get ongoing cramps like this during AF. I get cramps like right when I start my flow and it comes like once or twice then gone and doesnt come back. But now I have been having sharp pains in the pubic and ovary area most times the pubic area and its quick sharp pains like AF mized with OV pains but at the same time it feels like someone is popping fireworks inside my pubic area if that makes any sense. The last time I felt this pain was the day I found out I was pregnant and it was on and off kind of similar but less frequent. I have no clue what is going on though. I want to be all anxious and test but Im going to wait it out and see what happens. I have to go change my tampon anyways so lets see what happens then. I know its not heavy yet because if it was, I would've bled onto my underwear seeing that I have on a light tampon. Ugh Im driving myself crazy again. Sorry for the ranting. I thought it was too early for AF too especially when it showed its face on cd23 last month.

 

[mzswizz]

Ok update: Just changed tampon and now.......i put on another light tampon. Its still some up in there because its only on the top part. I wanted to see how much bleeding I would have so I checked my cervix. And when I looked at my finger, I wouldnt have known there was light bleeding. I had to wipe my finger off and thats when I saw the tinted color. Im assuming for now its not AF because I havent started my flow yet and its been 12 hours since the first time i seen pink!! Also it looks like it may be a chance that it is going to end at the end of the day. Its not really nothing close to my cervix which im shocked and also the inside is very soft and thick feeling I dont know if thats good or bad. Well praying that its possible we can still get the anniversary blessing of a child or children.

 

[Madrid98]

Please don't apologise! We are here to support each other above all things!!! Just remember how I was after O; I was complaining about af like pain & being as is it was coming even though it was far too early & then about 4 days later I got my bfp. So fx'd is going to be the same!!!!

 

[mzswizz]

Thanks Madrid From what I noticed that is kind of giving me high hopes is that, ok I saw the pink on the tp at 1am this morning and now it is almost 2pm and no flow yet. Usually i see pink and then in a hour or so BAM heavy or say I saw pink, put a pad on around 1am when I wake up and change the pad it would be either super heavy flow or it would be a flow already there so I know for sure its AF. But when I wipe i get nothing on the tp, my finger looks clean when I check my cervix etc. All these signs are pointing to it not being AF but then again, just so i dont get disappointed, these cramps got me thinking its AF and from last month AF came at cd23 so kind of in between.

 

[dusty_sheep]

Oh well, not going to BD tonight. The LO won't sleep and therefore all the effort to get us in the mood, are wasted.

I really feel like our whole sex life has fallen apart. DH's little friend not "getting up", DH not being in the mood (not knowing that this means that another cycle of 45 days is gone down the drain), the LO... and then me not getting into the mood because I'm mad at DH for not taking TTC seriously at all. There're just too many things that make things not work - and how are you supposed to DTD like that. Sorry people, you got me all sad and mad and disappointed here - and it's not even the time I ovulate, but anyway... it makes me feel kind of hopeless about the whole TTC.

 

[mzswizz]

dusty- I think you need to sit down and talk to your DH about the whole ttc situation. Just let him know how you feel. My DH, at first, didnt know how serious I was and didnt really understand why I was getting stressed. After talking to him and researching together and everything, we now have a mutual understanding and he symptom spots more than me now . Once your DH knows exactly how you feel and understands, I think you will be like me and my DH when it comes to DTD, that is when your LO is asleep.

 

[dusty_sheep]

Well, when I talked about TTC to him, he got so bothered and told me that this was the reason why he'd feel under so much pressure. So now I've stopped talking about TTC for the most part, didn't even tell him when I was ovulating, and we still have the same problem.

The thing is... and I know this is so wrong... I secretely blame him. I know it's not his fault, but still... he tells me that he still finds me sexy and all that - but seriously, that is hard to believe when the only way to get "him" up is to watch porn. I keep asking him

Plus, he does so many things that bring forward this problem physically - he smokes, drinks one beer per day plus the occasional other beer or glass of wine and besides that and coffee, he's not too much into beverages at all. And he's not like 30 but almost 50, so that doesn't make it any easier.

I wish I could be somewhere else right now - really miss living on my own. We don't even talk, but that makes living together even harder.

 

[rjsmam]

mzswiss - finger crossed for you, it's sounding v promising honey!

chrissi - your mum's comments made me chuckle - hope you do loads of dancing and partying tonight!

dusty - aaah i can so relate to your feelings right now. i wish i could be somewhere else at the moment too. we didn't dtd today and am sure my temp rise will start tomorrow so we missed ov. i miss living on my own too! just me & my my boy.

had an apmnt at the bank today which gives us some better options, have been so anxious about the apmnt - didn't help that we had a wopping thunder storm last night that rumbled on very loudly, so v little sleep! now that the apmnt went well i want to feel back to myself and happy again but am still feeling low, partly as i know i'm not even in the game this cycle and mostly as dh is being ridiculously grumpy. i am so low i haven't done any more organising for his party & need to pick myself up & give myself a kick...... am sure a good nights sleep will help!

love to you all
xx

 

[ChrissiK]

Dusty - so sorry to hear and how frustrating! Would he be willing to cut back on drinks and/or take a specific multivit like Fertilaid for men? Or is he secretly not excited about becoming a father?
Have you had a SA? Maybe that would encourage him to a better TTC lifestyle?

I've had agood time and even had 2 glasses of champagne. As luck would have it, my cousins wife was at the party too and she is pregnant "by accident" with her third. She proclaimed that condoms don't seem to be a good way of contraception for then, since they conceived the last two kids while using them. Grrrrrrr

Long trip back today (9h total), but it was nice to not think about TTC for a weekend!
AF coming middle of next week, debating whether I should test again...

 

[mzswizz]

Dusty-i think men dont understand how we feel. Its like if they were in our shoes they would understand how important it is for us. Kids are like a missing piece of a family for us. Hopefully your dh will stop the things that can effect ttc.

RJ-i tekk you i think our DHs go through PMS worst than us i think a day of pampering yourself will give you the kick you need.

Chrissi-Glad you had a wonderful time and enjoyed the wine also. My sister fell pregnant a month after she gave birth to my nephew "accidentally" so i totally understand how you feel.

AFM, Well ladies, dh and i dtd this morning and the end result is its AF. There was more blood (sorry tmi) so cd2 today for me. Hopefully one day my body will decide to cooperate with me and get pregnant.