is/was your LO a really bad sleeper? support and advise thread!

[Lara310809]

Hello all

I thought my eldest was a bad sleeper, but she was nothing compared to my youngest In short, she's BF (almost exclusively, even now at 13m old), she's clingy and inflexible with change. She will ONLY sleep on her tummy, she will ONLY fall asleep on the breast or rocked to sleep with her head on the keft shoulder.

She will not take a dummy, and uses the breast as one. She will not take a bottle (even of EBM). She co-sleeps and feeds all night long. If I put her back in her cot after each feed I'd have to spend upwards of an hour feeding and rocking her; and basically I'd be awake more than I'd be sleeping.

I can't sleep train her as there is no space away from either my eldest or OH, and we have no internal doors to block the sound, so the cries would wake them up. We're moving house in the next couple of months, so we will have a bigger place, and doors, so I hope to sleep train her then.

We're also TTC#3 so sleep training is pretty high on my list of priorities

 

[veganmama]

hello everyone!

my LO is 12 months and wakes every hour at night and every 15 minutes whilst taking a nap.

always have to feed back to sleep he will not self settle ever. and he always wakes up screaming and pissed off haha like kicking his legs really hard every single time

we co sleep since birth and he is breastfed 90% of the time still. he barley eats any solids.

 

[Claireyb1]

Hi Lara and Veganmama good to have you both on board - although it's a shame you have to be here as I'm sure we would all much prefer a good nights sleep!! lol
Wow Lara, you're brave ttc #3,I'm nervous to try for #2.How did you find it with 2 under 2?
Obviously I have no advice to either of you,otherwise I wouldn't be here,but sending hugs and understanding!!

xx

 

[Lara310809]

Hi Lara and Veganmama good to have you both on board - although it's a shame you have to be here as I'm sure we would all much prefer a good nights sleep!! lol
Wow Lara, you're brave ttc #3,I'm nervous to try for #2.How did you find it with 2 under 2?
Obviously I have no advice to either of you,otherwise I wouldn't be here,but sending hugs and understanding!!

xx

it was hard in the beginning but it worked out okay - you can't meet your own expectations sometimes so it's frustrating until you realise you have to take each moment as it comes right now though, they get on really well and love playing together

 

[Claireyb1]

How have everyones nights been lately??
Ours have been very mixed,some nights with 3-4 hour stretches and then others waking every hour!!! there is just no pattern or consistency?? I think that is sometimes harder than the constant wakings. If you knew what kind of night you were going to get then you could at least plan for it etc! lol
I'm still blaming teething as her top 2 teeth are coming in,but only one has cut through the gum A whole load more teeth to come though,so I can't see any sttn anytime soon
DF went out last night so no lay in for me this morning,despite him saying he would get up with her this morning...I knew this wouldn't happen

 

[Noelle610]

How have everyones nights been lately??
Ours have been very mixed,some nights with 3-4 hour stretches and then others waking every hour!!! there is just no pattern or consistency?? I think that is sometimes harder than the constant wakings. If you knew what kind of night you were going to get then you could at least plan for it etc! lol
I'm still blaming teething as her top 2 teeth are coming in,but only one has cut through the gum A whole load more teeth to come though,so I can't see any sttn anytime soon
DF went out last night so no lay in for me this morning,despite him saying he would get up with her this morning...I knew this wouldn't happen

I totally relate to this. It's the inconsistency of a bad sleeper that's ridiculously insane. Charlotte was up for two hours in the middle of the night a few nights ago and I just panicked that this would become her new normal. The next night she only woke twice for five minutes each time and it was great. But of course I am still stressed and worried we're going through the 9 month regression.

When they're so unpredictable, it's tough to sleep yourself. The worst thing ever is laying awake in bed thinking, "I should just stay up because she'll be up soon" and then they give you a nice long stretch. OR drifting off to sleep thinking you've got a few hours to spare and having baby wake up as soon as your head hits the pillow. UGH.

 

[Claireyb1]

Oh Noelle,you are so spot on! I almost dread going to bed sometimes as the fear of just drifting off to sleep only to be woken almost makes me feel ill
On the subject of sleep I'm going to go and try and have a nap as DF has taken her to the park(I think he is feeling guilty!)

 

[Gemmamuk]

Noelle you hit the nail on the head of how we are feeling!!!

Phil's been doing week nights as im working and hes not, and I'm doing weekends.
He's been tearing his hair out that Alex has been waking so often. Kind of makes me pleased that he finally understands what I've had to put up with for the last year!!
He's been staying in the spare room with him and convinced him to start sleeping in our room, as I know only too well how bad he snores and it's probably that disturbing Alex.
Over the last 4/5 nights he's gradually improved and last night (my night!) was the best in months!!!

-He went off to sleep at 7.
-I woke him at 9 to change his nappy as he'd poo'd and stank and has bad nappy rash. He was laughing and giggling and I thought he'd be a nightmare to get back to sleep, but I put him back in his cot, nipped to the loo, and he was asleep when I got back!
-He woke at 4, but I laid him back down, gave him his dummy, and he went straight off to sleep!
-he woke at 6, I gave him a bottle andhewent back off by 6.10!
-he didn't wake for the day until 9.30am!!

Amazing! Hope he keeps it up, although I doubt he will!

Claire I hope you managed to get a nap!!!!

I'm off now to make a large dent in a bottle of wine and eat my Chinese to cheer me up after I got robbed in asda today. Only £10 but I'm so mad

 

[kosh]

oh no, sorry to hear you go robbed gemma. but your night sounds brilliant!

welcome lara and veganmama!
vegamama - i read your reply in my thread re. BFing a 1 year old and thought, she should join us!

noelle - yep. inconsistency. that's the only thing that is consistent! i was saying to claire the other day - will we ever crack the code? because i'm sure there must be one! lol
my LO also stayed awake for 1-2hr a couple of nights this week and I panicked too.

luckily i don't lay in bed awake anymore. i go to sleep knowing he'll be awake anytime, but i manage to go to sleep almost immediately.
and i have zero expectations...

 

[MrsHedgehog]

Welcome Lara and Veganmama! This is a great place to rant about our terrible sleepers to people who understand what you're going through. Most people in real life I'm sure think I exaggerate or they think it's just because I'm doing things wrong!

We've had on the whole pretty good nights recently. LO is still waking a lot but the great thing is that she is going down pretty consistently in her cot for the first few hours of the night. This is wonderful as I finally have my evenings back. I used to have to go to bed when she did. I still nurse her to sleep but manage to get her into her cot without her waking up. I've been kind of trying to night wean and have had a bit of success getting LO back off to sleep without boob. However, she just wakes up 15 minutes later. This goes on for a few hours until I finally give up and feed her at which point she'll go back to sleep for a couple of hours. I pretty sure she must be hungry or thirsty.

 

[Gemmamuk]

Have you tried giving her a bottle or sippy cup of water mrs hedgehog?

I think that was partly Alex's problem too and now i leave a bottle of milk or water in his cot with him and I hear him every now and again sitting up and having a drink, then going back to sleep. Xx

 

[kosh]

funny you mention that about the drink - my LO has been asking for water during the night? like I BF him and he'd have some but then put his hand out pointing at his bottle of water.

 

[Claireyb1]

Gemma yay for the great night........Boo for being robbed in Asda!!! what on earth happened and were the police called? are you ok?

As for us,sleep is hit and miss with a few 3 hour stretches,but she has started to wake for the day early?? she starts stiring at approx 5-5.30 and is ready to get up at about 6ish
Also we have had a bit of biting while BF'ing! not sure why??

xx

 

[kosh]

sorry to her about the biting claire!
is she still doing it?

 

[Lulu1982]

Hey guys!

Glad to see some improvements and sending some energy and hugs to those of you with the naughty ones!

Sorry I don't get on much these days. Unfortunately, its not because we are busy sleeping!

Ava is so on and off, I'm constantly hedging bets on how our nights will be. She can be known to go 3 nights in a row sleeping 7-7 and only minor wake ups where I hear her out herself back to sleep. After these little spells we normally have at least a week where she will either be a nightmare to put down (in and out for up to 2 hours trying to settle her), up for at least 2 hours somewhere during the night, or waning t get up a 5am.

It's so frustrating because on her good nights, she goes into her cot after her milk and a cuddle, has her musical sheep on and goes off quietly. On her bad nights, there are no tears, just constant yelling and screaming until she makes herself choke (if I don't get in there fast enough).

She has tonsillitis a fortnight ago so all beta were off and she spent a lot of time napping on me during the day, and ironically slept through every night!!

I'm really starting to struggle with getting her in and out of her cot numerous times during the night and I'm dreading what's going t kick off once the little one arrives!!

Nap wise, she won't sleep longer than half an hour before lunch and unless we're in the car, she refuses to nap in the afternoon which means she's shattered by bed time.

I'll try and check in a bit more often but realised I haven't bought a single thing for this baby other than a double pram, so extreme panic has set in!

Sending loads of sleepy dust for tonight!xx

 

[Claireyb1]

Hi LuLu! nice to see you not so nice Ava is still being unpredictable
still pretty much the same here for me though,with no end in sight I day dream about sleep
Gosh,you're 30 weeks already! I bet it goes even quicker 2nd time around as you have so much more to be thinking about!? how old will Ava be when LO is born?
Sleepy dust to you and all the ladies!

 

[Lulu1982]

14 months if he's on time, so a little either way!

It's gone so fast, all I have a is a pram. I really need to pull my finger out and wish I'd done it before I started getting so uncomfortable!

My OH has taken Ava out for the day so I've had sme sleep and prepped the roast, its the first time I've slept for longer than 4 hours for weeks what with Ava, and typically, when she has a good night the baby wakes up and gives me a boot in the bladder!

I'm still praying daily, to the sleep god, for a sleepy one this time! These babies really are a force to be reckoned with!xx

 

[Claireyb1]

14 months if he's on time, so a little either way!

It's gone so fast, all I have a is a pram. I really need to pull my finger out and wish I'd done it before I started getting so uncomfortable!

My OH has taken Ava out for the day so I've had sme sleep and prepped the roast, its the first time I've slept for longer than 4 hours for weeks what with Ava, and typically, when she has a good night the baby wakes up and gives me a boot in the bladder!

I'm still praying daily, to the sleep god, for a sleepy one this time! These babies really are a force to be reckoned with!xx

I will pray for you too for a "sleepy one" God knows if/when I have No 2 I will be praying and praying I get a real sleeper as I don't think I could cope with another Lucy! 13 months of sleep no longer than 4 hours at a time is killing me?
Do you know what you are having?
x

 

[kosh]

nice to see you lulu! sorry ava is still a random sleeper, but glad the pregnancy is going ok. i don't know how I will cope with two!

we had an amazing night lastnight: bed at 8:30, waking at 0:30, 2:30, 5, 6:30 and up at 8am
i'm sure tonight will be cr@p

sleepy

 

[Claireyb1]

It's very quiet on here??? all sttn now? lol