is/was your LO a really bad sleeper? support and advise thread!

[Gemmamuk]

Very quiet on here ladies!! Hope your all getting lovely long sleeps

 

[kosh]

Very quiet on here ladies!! Hope your all getting lovely long sleeps

yeah sure!
we had a few very good nights but then yesterday he was up alsmot every hour....
how are you gemma?

firefly - are you 'up north'? let me know if you want to meet up!

hows everyone else?

 

[MrsHedgehog]

Very quiet on here ladies!! Hope your all getting lovely long sleeps

yeah sure!
we had a few very good nights but then yesterday he was up alsmot every hour....
how are you gemma?

firefly - are you 'up north'? let me know if you want to meet up!

hows everyone else?

It sucks when you have a few good nights and then just when you are getting used to more sleep you have a crap night again. We're pretty mixed at the moment. Some really good nights and some really terrible nights. We're all out of routine as well since it's the Easter holidays. Not sure how the clocks changing tonight are going to affect things.

Hope you all have a good Easter and that the Easter bunny brings your LOs some sleepy dust or at least plenty of chocolate to keep your energy levels up!!

 

[Claireyb1]

same for us too here- mixed nights. Although I seem to be getting more consistant longer stretches at the beginning of the night
think we have the body clock adjusted with the clock change as we had an early bedtime last night,so fingers crossed it was that easy.
hope everyone else is ok?
xx

 

[Gemmamuk]

Oh it really does suck when you get used to better sleep then it all goes out the window

We are kind of the same with Alex. He is different every single week!
Week before last he was sleeping for half hour at 7 then talking to himself/playing/shouting muuuuuum for anything up till midnight, then waking for a cuddle at 4, and 7 fora bottle the waking for the day at 8.30.

Last week he was sleeping better at the beginning, then waking at 11, 3, 6 and 7 before waking for the day at 8.30.

Saturday night he must have known we were meant to be taking him to church and the clocks changed, as he woke every hour after we put him down at 8, and was awake between 2 and 6.30 crying his heart out. Think it's a combination of his molars coming through and them giving him a bad tummy

Last night we were out, so he didn't get to bed until 9. he was inconsolable again at midnight so I cuddled up in the spare bed with him and it was lovely treat to get nice cuddles!! He slept from 1 until about 5, then woke at 7 and was messing about so I put him in his cot and he slept until 10

 

[kosh]

for the last few days Gael was waking every.single.hour but at least he would settle easily. yesterday he was up from 4-6am
i got so upset i was crying too
what have i done wrong?

 

[firefly15]

everyone! Our nights are fecking awful at the moment, I think a combination of teething and wonder week 75 are to blame at the moment (got to blame something, right?!). We're having wake ups every 2 hours at best and just constantly at the worst. Also having a few 2 hour long parties thrown in for good measure at hideous times

Kosh, we had to change our plans as OH's Dad got shingles and his mum a chest infection just before we were due to go up to see them OH has to be away with work a bit over the next couple of weeks so not sure if we'll be able to get up north until the summer now. Booo.

I haven't had a chance to read the recent posts but will try to catch up soon.

Oh, and Kosh, you haven't done anything wrong there really is no logic at all to the sleep in my opinion! xx

 

[firefly15]

Oh my god, have I killed this thread!??!

Hope everyone isn't having to hit the too hard this weekend.

Our nights have been really mixed the last few days, last night started really badly but then I got a 4 hour stretch from 1-5am No idea why LO is so unsettled at the moment, nothing is different day to day but he's refusing to eat and just wanting boob all day long so something must be up. If only I could read minds!

 

[Gemmamuk]

Lol firefly!

Our nights are mixed too but a lot better generally, with just 3 or 4 wakings a night.
Except tues night/wed morning when he was screaming in pain with his 3rd molar cutting, until 4.30am. When my alarm went off for work at 6.30am I could have cried!

How's everyone else?

 

[ellebelle]

Hi ladies! I haven't posted for quite some time (mostly because I felt I couldn't complain, but was still suffering frequent wake ups and middle of night parties from my twins) BUT I recently had a bit of success? Was following a bit of advice from the No Cry Sleep Solution as well I always had a light on in the night and as soon as I started keeping their room darker.... have had some better sleeps! It's only been 4 nights with a darker room but all those nights have had 2 wake ups or less, so I don't know if that might help anyone in here?

I thought they were having nightmares, but I think they were just waking up and looking for me and crying. Or who knows really, I'm still at a loss.

Now waiting for teething to start up again and be back to bad sleeping...

 

[kosh]

firefly!
sorry I didn't reply earlier! just let me know whenever you are 'up north'

our nights have been really mixed - a few good ones with only 3-4 wakings a night (that is good for us ) but mainly constant wakings and comfort sucking for hours and hours...

I posted a question in the toddler section, some of you may be interested:
https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/t...question-extended-bfing-co-sleeping-mums.html

 

[kosh]

Hi ladies! I haven't posted for quite some time (mostly because I felt I couldn't complain, but was still suffering frequent wake ups and middle of night parties from my twins) BUT I recently had a bit of success? Was following a bit of advice from the No Cry Sleep Solution as well I always had a light on in the night and as soon as I started keeping their room darker.... have had some better sleeps! It's only been 4 nights with a darker room but all those nights have had 2 wake ups or less, so I don't know if that might help anyone in here?

I thought they were having nightmares, but I think they were just waking up and looking for me and crying. Or who knows really, I'm still at a loss.

Now waiting for teething to start up again and be back to bad sleeping...

that's very interesting ellebelle.
We don't have a night light but I usually leave the hall light or other light on. I too wonder if he has nightmares, but also, sometimes he wakes and when he sees the light coming through the door he seems even more dissorientated? in fact we used to have a night light in the room and then stopped using it bacause I thought he was actually scared of that light?
I will try totally dark tonight

are you reading the NCSS for babies or toddlers?

 

[MrsHedgehog]

Kosh - your thread about BF is really interesting. I do think that LOs sleep would improve if we stopped BF but I also believe that BF is still the best thing for her right now. If we get to 2 and she's still sleeping badly and BF a lot then I'll maybe consider weaning then. We're still having mixed nights, some good and others awful. I'm sure there's a kind of pattern to it, LO will have a great night or two then things will get gradually worse until she has a terrible night of waking every hour. Then she'll have another few good nights and it'll start again. On the bad nights, like your LO Kosh, she'll want to nurse and nurse and will sometimes wake again after 5 mins. I wonder if on these bad nights she's trying to maintain my supply or something? I really am at a complete loss. It's reassuring though to hear that your LO behaves in the same way as it makes me think it's more normal and not just something I've done wrong.

 

[kosh]

so we went pitch black last night and....I think we had only 2 wake ups?! it was really strange, because I know he was waking more, as he was tossing and turning, but somehow he managed to go back to sleep! no idea if it was the room being darker or something else, but I'm definetely not switching the light on tonight!

 

[kosh]

Kosh - your thread about BF is really interesting. I do think that LOs sleep would improve if we stopped BF but I also believe that BF is still the best thing for her right now. If we get to 2 and she's still sleeping badly and BF a lot then I'll maybe consider weaning then. We're still having mixed nights, some good and others awful. I'm sure there's a kind of pattern to it, LO will have a great night or two then things will get gradually worse until she has a terrible night of waking every hour. Then she'll have another few good nights and it'll start again. On the bad nights, like your LO Kosh, she'll want to nurse and nurse and will sometimes wake again after 5 mins. I wonder if on these bad nights she's trying to maintain my supply or something? I really am at a complete loss. It's reassuring though to hear that your LO behaves in the same way as it makes me think it's more normal and not just something I've done wrong.

I totally agree with you that stopping BF might help them sleep better (several posts on that thread and ppl IRL mentioned it) but I too think that it is the best for my LO atm and I know he is not ready to stop yet.

interesting what you think re. supply. never thought about it because I always assume it's more like comfort sucking (...does it do anything to supply??)

we had an incredibly good night last night so I feel very positive today but after a bad night I feel awful and very down and tend to blame myself for his 'behaviour'. it is always reassuring to know I am not the only one, although I still wonder if it is somehow a combination of a particular personality type and BF?

 

[MrsHedgehog]

Kosh - your thread about BF is really interesting. I do think that LOs sleep would improve if we stopped BF but I also believe that BF is still the best thing for her right now. If we get to 2 and she's still sleeping badly and BF a lot then I'll maybe consider weaning then. We're still having mixed nights, some good and others awful. I'm sure there's a kind of pattern to it, LO will have a great night or two then things will get gradually worse until she has a terrible night of waking every hour. Then she'll have another few good nights and it'll start again. On the bad nights, like your LO Kosh, she'll want to nurse and nurse and will sometimes wake again after 5 mins. I wonder if on these bad nights she's trying to maintain my supply or something? I really am at a complete loss. It's reassuring though to hear that your LO behaves in the same way as it makes me think it's more normal and not just something I've done wrong.

I totally agree with you that stopping BF might help them sleep better (several posts on that thread and ppl IRL mentioned it) but I too think that it is the best for my LO atm and I know he is not ready to stop yet.

interesting what you think re. supply. never thought about it because I always assume it's more like comfort sucking (...does it do anything to supply??)

we had an incredibly good night last night so I feel very positive today but after a bad night I feel awful and very down and tend to blame myself for his 'behaviour'. it is always reassuring to know I am not the only one, although I still wonder if it is somehow a combination of a particular personality type and BF?

That's great that you had a better night! We keep the room as dark as we can and LO definitely does sleep better that way most of the time.

I'm pretty sure that comfort sucking affects supply, kind of like putting in an order for the next day or something. I hate when LO just wants to comfort suck all night as I find it really uncomfortable and she likes to put her hands under my arms and tickle me! When she is actually feeding it's better and I can go back to sleep.

I also agree that it's a combination of things. There are plenty of women I'm sure who breastfeed and have good sleepers so I don't think BF is entirely to blame. My LO is really sensitive and needs lots of attention. I don't like to say she's 'high needs' as that sounds so negative when really she's such a delight, so gentle-natured, sweet, contented and smiley. She does just seem to need me more than some other babies need their mums. I sometimes blame myself, and I know that other people look at me and think that I've created a super-clingy baby. But then sometimes I see other mums who have done things the same way I have and their kids are completely different so I'm reassured that a lot of it is just down to personality. Is your LO quite 'clingy' (sorry, hate that word but can't think of another) during the day or is it just at night?

 

[ellebelle]

are you reading the NCSS for babies or toddlers?

I don't know actually, I just read a helpful snippet from the book in the thrift store and for some reason didn't bother buying it, HAHA

 

[kosh]

sorry for the late reply mrs hedgehog, I was waiting to have some time to write a proper reply....

I'm pretty sure that comfort sucking affects supply, kind of like putting in an order for the next day or something. I hate when LO just wants to comfort suck all night as I find it really uncomfortable and she likes to put her hands under my arms and tickle me! When she is actually feeding it's better and I can go back to sleep.

yes, comfort suck feels more like pulling and i can't relax completely
i used to think the same re. supply etc but for some reason I thought now after a year supply was mch more established and wouldn't be affected so much? also, I don't think i do have more milk after a particularly bad night?

I also agree that it's a combination of things. There are plenty of women I'm sure who breastfeed and have good sleepers so I don't think BF is entirely to blame. My LO is really sensitive and needs lots of attention. I don't like to say she's 'high needs' as that sounds so negative when really she's such a delight, so gentle-natured, sweet, contented and smiley. She does just seem to need me more than some other babies need their mums. I sometimes blame myself, and I know that other people look at me and think that I've created a super-clingy baby.
But then sometimes I see other mums who have done things the same way I have and their kids are completely different so I'm reassured that a lot of it is just down to personality. Is your LO quite 'clingy' (sorry, hate that word but can't think of another) during the day or is it just at night?

absolutely. mine is also very sensitive - high needs and very clingy (don't like the terms either). I know that some ppl may think that I made him that way because of how I react/reacted to his needs, but I don't think I could have done anything different. I was reading my hospital notes the other day, even the MW commented on how unsettled he was. he would only settle in my arms. i would have him all night skin to skin with me. poor thing he couldn't latch/feed - no wonder he was so distressed.

i started a new thread in the toddler section
https://babyandbump.momtastic.com/toddler-pre-school/1834495-extended-bf-good-ish-sleepers.html

 

[firefly15]

Yup, another one with a sensitive, clingy and high needs baby! Totally agree Kosh that despite 'helpful' suggestions that I've made him this way I disagree completely! I parent him this way because I've responded to the way he is. I don't believe for a second that he'd be any different if I'd made other choices down the line and I certainly don't think that bf has been the cause. I admit that it probably has a role to play in the night wakings now, but I don't think it caused them.

My OH was talking to a friend of his a few weeks ago and discovered that his little boy is exactly the same, only he's 2 now and still waking around 5 times a night His mum weaned him at 18 months hoping that it would help with the nights but no such luck.

I have noticed more recently that when LO wakes in the night now, he's really tense and upset - as soon as he gets near the boob you can feel all the tension go of him and he visibly relaxes and mostly drifts straight back to sleep. Does make me wonder how I'll ever get him to drop the night feeds though...

We've had a mixture of horrendous nights last week which I think was partly due to him being ill and partly because OH was away all week with work and he misses him. This weekend and last night were not so bad - only 2 wake ups unfortunately I think it's more illness related than any miraculous transformation in sleep habits, but I'll take my sleep when I can!

Hope everyone else is surviving out there

 

[ellebelle]

Oh, sorry everyone, false alarm.
The twins slept amazing the first week in their new room.
Now they are back to waking every couple hours, hah! I don't know what the heck it is.
Now we're all sick with a cold and lastnight they kept me up till 3am and then we were up at 6am for the day.... BRUTAL.