January Blizzards - 2016 Rainbows

[bunyhuny]

Felt like crud all weekend. Didn't even get out of bed Sunday. Managed to get up and dressed today so I could go for a drive with DH to look at potential future neighborhoods. Felt awful the whole time, but it was nice getting to spend the day with him. I'm so exhausted. I don't know how it's even possible to feel this awful for this long.


minimoocow- Awwww, hunny. I think everything is going to be just fine. Husbands just say really dumb things sometimes when they're trying to be supportive. Most of them really have no idea what they're saying. I think your scan is going to be absolutely wonderful.

 

[Spudtastic]

I've also felt like shite all day too. Morning sickness with dd was 24/7 until 31 weeks. I keep telling myself my dd needs a sibling so she's not alone in the world when dh and I are old. That keeps me going.

I can't wait until we're all out of the first tri.

When do you all plan on telling everyone?
We want to wait until 14 weeks for everyone including parents this time. With dd I told everyone at 6 weeks, with my 8 week mc we hadn't told anybody. With my mmc we'd told parents at 7 weeks and everyone at 11 weeks.

 

[EverythingXd]

Good luck Minimoo and Heather for your scans. I know how nervous you both must be, and I have my fingers crossed for you guys.

It's great to hear so many of you are feeling rotten! I have thankfully joined you in the last few days, I'm feeling hungry between meals and that hunger is gradually feeling more like nausea (woop!).

I may have to wait 7 weeks until my next scan... I'll be over 13 weeks but I'm on holiday for a week before that. I'm considering getting a private early scan for reassurance at 9/10 weeks before we go on holiday. The problem is, if it's bad news it will ruin our holiday

 

[Heather.1987]

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[minimoocow]

Thanks everyone but not feeling too hopeful for tomorrow. Just picked up my progesterone levels that were tested last Thursday and they have fallen from 90+ to 43

I know they can fluctuate a little but that seems like too much to me. I am on cyclocest anyway so I think they should be higher than that . . . feeling pretty miserable right now

 

[kdmalk]

minimoo- 43 is still good. Mine were in the 40's after I had already started progesterone, so I think you are still alright. I have no idea what cyclocest is, but assuming some sort of progesterone??? Everything could still be fine. Try to stay calm.

Hope everything goes well tomorrow.

AFM, I feel like a walking ball of vomit.... except that I still have not puked. I just walk around gagging and dry heaving all day. Even DH is starting to feel sorry for me, which is impressive. I have been trying not to be too needy, and I think he can tell that I am feeling worse than I let on, so he has been super sweet. I guess that is a plus. I imagine my face looks very strange all day at work while I walk around trying to convince my food to stay down. lol

 

[minimoocow]

Oh and to top it off just been to the bathroom and I've got some brown/yellow spotting. Could today get any better?

 

[Heather.1987]

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[Heather.1987]

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[Topanga053]

Congrats, Heather!!! So exciting!!!

Mini- I am so sorry that your progesterone levels have fallen and that you had some spotting. Has that stopped? Is your scan today? I'm thinking of you and hoping that it goes well.

As far as telling people, we've done it a little differently for all three of our pregnancies. For the first, we started telling work and close friends around 8 weeks when things SEEMED to be going fine. of course, that was when we had a MMC. After I had the D&C, we ended up just posting about it on FB because so many people were asking and it was impossible to keep track of who we still had to tell privately about the loss. So we didn't announce that pregnancy on FB, but did announce the miscarriage.

With LO, we waited until 12 weeks. This time, we've already announced. Since we saw a healthy heartbeat at the scan, we figured we would announce. We know there's still a cognizable risk, but we figured that even if there's a loss, we will probably end up telling quite a few people anyway (and I might need some time off from work), so we thought there was no point in hiding it, if we were going to tell people even if we lose it. Also, ALL of my co-workers and friends and family were INCREDIBLY supportive after my miscarriage, so I knew I would need to depend on that support again.

 

[Fit_Mama2Be]

That's great Heather congratulations!!

Hope all goes well for you today Mini, thinking of you.

 

[Heather.1987]

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[minimoocow]

Congrats Heather - lovely first scan result!

The hospital phoned and have put my scan back by an hour so not until 8.15 tonight (2 and a half hours to go!)

I'm not expecting good news but will post later when I get back. Spotting stopped after 30 mins or so last night and no more today so that's a bonus. Was told to double up the cyclogest though so lots of leakage today which had me running to the loo to check every hour!!!

 

[Spudtastic]

Mini moo - good luck at your scan. I'm thinking of you. I hope it goes well.

Heather - amazing scan. Congratulations.

 

[bunyhuny]

Congratulations, Heather! Awesome news! And congrats on gaining 3 days all at once.

Mini- I hope the scan went well. Thinking good thoughts for you! I'm glad the spotting went away, it sounds like it never got heavy, so that's great news. From my understanding, progesterone can rise and fall during pregnancy (and is higher or lower at different times of day even!), so hopefully that is all that is happening.


Afm- DH and I are probably going to hold off on telling family about the pregnancy until 20-ish weeks when we go down to visit my mom this summer. It's not that we would hide a miscarriage, it's just that since we've been trying for so long, everyone is so emotionally invested in the outcome and they say incredibly stupid and insensitive things whenever I'm pregnant or when they're talking about one of my losses. I can't take care of everyone else's emotional needs and fears while trying to function within my own stress and worry. I just know my mom would call after every scan and every appt to analyze every little detail and result and number to the point of having me terrified and on edge more than I already am. She would read article after article and recite them all back to me until I can no longer function. She has done that every single pregnancy and she makes it so much about her, and how hard this is for her, and what she feels and thinks and needs. I really, really, really cannot deal with that again right now.

Morning sickness doesn't hit hard if I stay laying down, but rears it's ugly head within a few minutes of standing up. Of course, now I'm afraid of standing up because it feels so horrible. I'm getting really down on myself about staying in bed, I feel like I'm being lazy and unhealthy and a crappy future mom, but I'm so wiped out from the constant nausea that it's just really nice not to have to deal with it for a little while.

Tomorrow morning is my 8 week scan. Hopefully it goes well.

 

[Spudtastic]

I think if i have a loss this time (though I hope not) I would tell my parents and friends. By nottelling everyone I'm avoiding those comments from people who think they're trying to help but get it totally wrong. one person in particular said lot's of inappropriate things like
'miscarriage is really common. You shouldn't be upset'
And when I needed an erpc the same person said 'oh I wouldn't do that you can still die from general anesthetic'. They were just two of many From this one person.
Then there was the friend who went on about how lucky I was the baby died because it was deformed (she was speculating) and how lucky I was that it didn't happen at 30 weeks and I should feel happy. And she just went on and on and on.

I guess those two particular people just rubbed me up the wrong way but one was really well meaning.

 

[Spudtastic]

Buny - I understand. Your mum sounds emotionally draining on you. And it's hard to talk to parents abput these things. I know mine wouldn't take me talking to them about their behavior the right way.

I'd love to keep everything a secret until 20 weeks but I think I'll crack at 14.

 

[bunyhuny]

Spud- People say really ridiculous things, don't they? Drives me crazy. My sister recently got married and decided to use the song that DH and I played when we were preparing our first lost baby for cremation as her wedding song for walking down the isle. Given, she didn't know that it was his song when she picked it, but I told her two months before the wedding (as soon as I found out she had picked it) that I wouldn't be able to deal with her playing it. So she says she'll change it, then we get to the rehearsal and when she start walking in, they cue up his song. Of course, I totally lose it in front of everyone and walk out of the rehearsal bawling my eyes out. After the rehearsal her fiance's mom walks up to me and asks what's going on. I start to tell her about my miscarriage and it being the song we picked out for saying goodbye to our baby, and she said she already knew all that (since apparently my sister discussed mt miscarriage with this woman that I don't even know and they decided together that my sister shouldn't have to give up her wedding song). So yeah, she KNEW what was wrong, she just wanted to make it clear she thought I was being a whiny baby. After that, I went up to my sister and said that it was really hurtful that she didn't at least give me warning that she didn't change it, and she literally told me that I need to realize that my miscarriage hurt other people besides just me and I need to stop acting like it's all about my feelings. Then she said she wouldn't be changing the song and I should think of it as her way of including my son in the ceremony. I held my tongue since it was her wedding, and as matron of honor I figured I had to support her even if she was being an obnoxious bridezilla, but my god it hurt.

Oh, and once my entire family found out what she did, they all agreed that it was her wedding and if she wanted to play that song I needed to keep my mouth shut and deal with it.

 

[Heather.1987]

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[EverythingXd]

Minimoo I hope your scan is going / has gone ok. It's good that the spotting didn't last long although I'm sure it was scary as hell. Really hoping for a positive outcome for you.

Heather that's so good to hear! I am now predicting a BOY for you!! Both of my boys due dates were put earlier after scans - that's all I'm basing my prediction on! I haven't even had any girls to compare! Lol.

I have now told 3 close friends. The first one I told, was bizarre - I went round to see her a few days after getting my BFP and she said "did you tell me you were pregnant? I had a dream that you did, but it was so real now I'm confused. Was it a dream?" Weird! Well, I had to tell her!!