June Baby Angels

[Middysquidge]

I've added you in my signature now sweetmomma with a flashing BFP, yaaaayyy! Hope that's okay!

Meli, really really best of luck, I'm wishing you get a BFP so much, come on second one of the grouupppppp!

I'm cd1, horrid nasty af came but I'm glad cos I think it means I won't miss my big 'o' this month, whoop whoop! x x x

 

[angel2010]

Jasmine, hope you get the house!!!
Meli, FX!!
Jenn, thanks for sharing! Talk to you soon!
Jenk, still in the waiting game?
Vegas, April isn't far off, if we don't get it this cycle, I will be there with you.

AFM, still waiting to O. I had some red spotting yesterday when I checked my cm. There was a teeny bit when I wiped, but never any on my pantyliner. I am now on cd 14. I could o anytime between today and cd 22 (previous cycles were 35 days). Hope it happens soon though, I don't want to keep having daily sex thinking it is about to happen!

 

[Meli_H]

JennC,

I like what you shared-thank you!

Jenkb,

What's up??? have you tested again?? FX!!

Jasmine,

Glad to hear that you won’t miss your O next month Now you can really enjoy yourself during your hen’s weekend! Can you believe it’s almost here-your ttc time?

Angel,

GL catching the egg!!! FX!

AFM, I took a FRER this morning (9dpo) and of course, BFN I would like to wait until Thursday before re-testing, but I have a feeling that I won’t be able to wait, and will re-test tomorrow’s FMU….sigh…more money down the drain The only reason that I am madly testing is because of my symptoms on 7dpo…I will feel so STUPID if not pg. I do solemnly swear that if I am not pg this month, I will no longer test early…I mean it!

 

[jennc]

Okay, I had a lot of catching up to do. First, I would like to point out the obvious at this point I think that just about all of us are playing the "what if" game. What makes it worse is that our bodies can't decide what they are doing. GRRRRRR!!!! I am also going to give out a warning about Provera. I started it when I was 20 and stayed on it for 7 years. After that I went on the pill and had a very regular period which I could predict down to the minute. However, one or the other or both apparently made my lining really thin. It wasn't something I had even thought about before this group but when I talked with my ob, she said it was very possible that it caused my mc. I'm not saying not to use it, just be cautious. Oh, I should probably explain why I haven't been on. My husband and I share a computer and he does most of his work on the computer. Not only that, he isn't exactly supportive of my involvement with the site. I was on here the other day and he says to me, "Don't you think it's about time to be done with that?" He didn't really mean it like it came out. He just wants me to try to focus more on trying again. What he doesn't understand is that, this site doesn't make me dwell on the bad, it actually helps me stay positive about trying again and gives me a chance to get things out that I know he wouldn't be happy about me venting. I was actually crying with my mother yesterday over the whole thing. It just seems like right now too much is changing and I have very little control over any of it. I studied psychology, so I know what that lack of control can do to a person. I'm also worried about the fact that not working as much is making me sleep more, a lot more which from my past experiences tells me is never a good sign. Crying is usually how I work through things and I feel like it makes him so uncomfortable. He just wants me to be happy... all the time.

Momma- Really happy for you. It's also great that your doc is so cool. My ob is also that way. I think she fully anticipates me being there every couple of days when I get pregnant again. She also guaranteed that she will do an early detection sono at 6 weeks and a day since 6 weeks was when I miscarried.

Stef- I'm sorry they let you go but maybe this will open you up to something better. You know the saying, "God doesn't shut a door without opening another."

Megan- I am praying that you are pg. My thoughts are with you.

Jasmine- I'm sorry that you were having a bad day but it was really funny to hear about your drunken dancing to disney music. Don't let anyone criticize. there is nothing wrong with that. I hope everything goes well with the house. Be hopeful too!

Vegas- I am sooo jealous of the weather. I used to live in Georgia and sometimes (especially when it is below 0 and we got like a foot of snow last night) I miss it sooo much. Good luck with the new job Tues! I'll be rooting for you. There is nothing wrong with a glass of wine with dinner. In fact, wine is probably the most beneficial health-wise. I have been having a half glass here and there. That is really awesome about the new plants and it gave you an excuse to fix up the front. I'm sorry to hear that your hubby doesn't want to ttc again right away. Mine is almost literally counting down the days. I think he figures I will snap out of my funk that way. The good news for you is that he is okay with adopting. Mine is not and we are poor white folk so if we can't carry to term, there goes my chances of a child. I think it's great. To me, it's easy to love your own kids, it's hard to love and care for someone else's. I work as a behavior specialist for kids and I have this one parent who is raising three kids that aren't hers in addition to three that are. I sometimes forget that she is even not their biological mom, she's so wonderful with them. Try to view is as an opportunity to bring love and joy into a child's life. In a lot of cases, it can be the best thing that child ever had.

Angel- That humping picture does make me giggle. I too am an avid pinterest lover! Is it okay if I follow everyone? Mine is just under Jenn Cornman, I think. Mine's the one with lost of recipes and behavior based info.

Jenk- How do you deal with 3-4 week periods? You must be a saint disguised as a person! I think I would lose my sanity with a period that long. That must be really hard, especially when you are ttc. You have to wait so much longer. I'm sorry for that. For all of that! None of it sounds like fun.

Meli- Here's hoping you are! and just when you thought you were out for the month. B6 is never a bad thing. The good news of that too is that whatever your body doesn't need it just pees out. I give you fair warning that it could turn your pee a greenish color but it's normal. My husband freaked out the first time he saw the green and demanded I discontinue it until he got the okay from my ob. I hear yo about the fertility docs. Like I said, we wouldn't be able to do it because we couldn't afford it. So, here is to sincerely hoping we can do it the natural way, for all of us.

There, I think I am caught up.
Due to the hubby situation, I can't guarantee when I will be on next but I will check in as often as I can. Prayers are with everyone, especially since it is coming around the time everyone will be getting to try again. Happy Humping!

 

[vegasbaby]

Meli: Just give up and buy a bunch of the internet cheapie HPT's. I swear they are just as sensitive as the FRER's. All the testing you want, for a fraction of the price. It will keep you sane.

Jasmine: Your photo on Pinterest is so pretty! For some reason I imagined that you were a brunette. Must be the Aladdin thing. Magazine design sounds like fun. I'm a landscape architect.

Angel: Good luck with all the . Hope you O soon so you can get a break.

Jenn: That poem/quote says it all, doesn't it?

AFM: I am on my lunch break from my orientation day. The people at orientation are nice, but none work in my department so I'll never see them again. We have been going over benefits all day so it is pretty boring. I came home as it was close (and I wanted to let the dogs out), but now I have to go back. Sorry if I've missed anyone.

 

[Meli_H]

Jennc,

I know what you mean about the computer. DH works from home, and he has his computer in the home office. We actually had a second computer in one of our spare bedrooms, that’s where my stepson does his HW and I’ll use that computer if DH is using his. Well, that second computer broke down about a month ago….I don’t want to ‘suggest’ or ‘ask’ when we’re buying a new computer, due to the holidays, and the fact that we are re-doing the front yard, and he just bought plantation shutters for the whole house..I’m afraid if I ask about the computer, he’ll say “well, why don’t you buy it…I’m spending all this money on the yard and shutters” lol! Soooooooo, I’m fine with jumping on his computer when he’s not using it (which is not very often), or using my Nook (although I hate typing on that-not very user friendly at all, but it’s great to read/browse the internet). When I’m at work is when I’m able to post the most!

My DH also used to give me a hard time about being on this site. After numerous discussions with him, and especially after our last blowout, and y’all listened to me rant and rave like a lunatic, and talked some sense into me, he finally recognizes that BnB is helping me, not hurting me. He has seen me focused on ttc for the last couple months, so I know that helped. Now he calls BnB my ‘internet porn” lol! He’ll see me online and say “whatcha doing?” and I respond, “oh, u know, just my internet porn” lol!

MY DH also doesn’t like me crying--and I am such an emotional person and cry at the drop of the hat! I hate it!! I refuse to watch sad movies because I cry! He also wants me to be happy, all the time, like ur DH. They feel uncomfortable and just want to ‘make things all better’. I hope that your DH comes around to understanding and supporting you in doing the things that make you feel better, even if he doesn’t understand or agree with it all. Thank goodness you have your mother to vent to--at least she understands, I’m sure. Big hugs to you!!! I hope your DH comes around soon…

PS-I’m following you on pinterest


Vegas

You crack me up==just give up and buy the IC’s lol! I plan to do just that-give up and buy a bunch of the internet cheapie HPT’s next week, if I’m not pg (look at me, still holding on to a sliver of hope ). I think Stef said she listed some on ebay-I’ll buy them from her if hers are still available.

You made me lol when you mentioned that you imagined Jasmine as a brunette due to the Aladdin thing! Too funny, but it makes sense!

I didn’t know that your new job is close enough to to your house to stop by on your lunch break! That’s awesome!!

 

[angel2010]

I do solemnly swear that if I am not pg this month, I will no longer test early…I mean it!

We will help hold you to this!!!!

 

[angel2010]

Glad you had a good first part of the day Vegas, hope the second part goes well too!!!!

Jenn, have you shown your oh the ttc part of this site!! Where are you located? Your job sounds very interesting. Do you work with a specific age group?
I am not following you on pinterest. Also, when are you ttc?

Megan, how are you?

 

[Meli_H]

I do solemnly swear that if I am not pg this month, I will no longer test early…I mean it!

We will help hold you to this!!!!

I would sooooooooo appreciate it!! Thank you!!

 

[sweetmommaof2]

Jasmine- Yes that is perfectly ok with me!
I have my fingers crossed for everyone in the 2ww and waiting for ovulation! Baby Dust!
UPDATE- So I went in and tested last wedn. and my hcg level was 2159... I went in today and it is now 16,797! I am officially passed the week I was when I miscarried my june angel.
Lots of hugs and loves have a good night ladies

 

[angel2010]

I am very happy for you Sweetmomma!!!


Jasmine, some how I didn't read the last sentence of your post earlier! That is fantastic news!!!

 

[jenkb123]

So it is now cd44. Still no sign of af. I called my doctors office today and talked to the nurse. She said my day 25 blood test showed that I likely didn't ovulate. The longer between cycles the longer af typically sticks around (the last time I had a 50 day cycle af stayed for 4 weeks and the majority of this time it was really heavy). I am going to start Provera today as this seems to be the only thing that helps me to regulate things. Without it my cycles just get further and further apart and last longer and longer which makes ttc so much harder than it already is. I take it for ten days. Once I stop af will come 1-2 days later. The good thing about that is that af will only stay for a week despite the fact that it will be a 54 day cycle. The last time I took Provera (along with the clomid and the trigger shot) I got my one and only bfp. I am hopeful that it will work again. This cycle with just the clomid and no trigger shot (or Provera) resulted in a cycle where I didn't ovulate and af went on a long vacation. I obviously need to shake things up. I hate taking medication....I would so much rather do things naturally. Unfortunately my body won't cooperate with me. The one positive thing about taking the Provera is that my Feb 6-8 trip won't screw up my follicle tracking for this cycle. If I had started af in the next few days the tracking would have fallen right in the middle of when I would be away which would have meant I would have had to wait another full cycle before I could do it. I feel like I need the tracking and the trigger shot to have any chance at getting a bfp.

 

[sweetmommaof2]

Jenk- I really hope it works for you! You deserve a BFP!!!! Keep positive! It will happen again!!!!!

 

[sweetmommaof2]

Ok I hope this doesn't come out cheesy but this is something serious I want to ask all of you... Is it ok for me to still be apart of this thread now that I am preggers again??? Ladies please be honest. I don't want to hurt anyones feelings, You girls are amazing and helped me out alot and the support on this thread is astonishing! The last thing I would ever want is to hurt any of you...

 

[angel2010]

ABSOLUTELY!!!! Your success only gives us all hope.

 

[angel2010]

Good luck Jenk! Don't mean to sound scary, but Jenn posted earlier about Provera possible making uterus linings too thin. I don't have any experience though.

 

[jenkb123]

Meli - Sounds like your yard will be fabulous when you are done. I am so jealous of all of you who are outside and gardening in warm weather. It is still quite cold here although it has warmed up a bit since Sunday (got as cold as -52 Celsius with the windchill). I do think I would miss the snow if I lived somewhere warm year round though.

I don't know if I have patience. I am feeling quite impatient at the moment. I really hate my body for making me wait like this. Sorry about your bfn. It is still early though so you are still in with a chance!! I am still hopeful for you!!
It is so hard to wait to test. Testing early does not usually do anything but cause disappointment. I will join you in your pact not to test early.

Vegas - That worked out great with the plants. It was really nice of your neighbor to pass them on to you!! Gardening can be a workout!! All the digging, lifting, bending and squatting use muscles you don't use in regular day to day life!! I am so glad to hear your husband is on board with ttc right away once you are able to. My husband and I haven't really talked about adoption yet. I would consider it if I could not have a baby of my own. Part of me feels that if I considered it now I would be admitting that I might never have a baby of my own. I am not ready to do that yet. I think if we were a year down the road with no sticky bfp we would have the conversation though. I think it is nice that your husband has brought it up. To me it seems like he is trying to take the pressure off of you a bit. Like he is saying that he would be happy with another child any way possible and he doesn't want you to have to go through the trauma of more m/c's.

First day down!! On to the second day!! Hope you got all the boring training out of the way and can get down to more interesting work soon!!

Jasmine - Glad to hear you finally got your application in!! Fx'ed for you. I think you are right though. If it doesn't work out with this one you will find another (better) one!! Figuring out what you want is half the battle!! I'm glad af came earlier than expected. Especially since you will now be home for o time!!

Angel - Hope o happens soon and you can catch the egg this month!! All of the waiting is tough. It would be nice if there was a clear cut way of knowing exactly what was going on and when things were going to happen. But I guess that would take all the "fun" out of the ttc process.

jennc - Thanks for the warning about Provera. Unfortunately if I don't take it my body gets more and more out of whack. This will be my third time taking it since last May. When I take it it seems to regulate things for a few months and then af starts taking longer to arrive and staying longer when she gets here. The good thing is since I had monitoring the last time I took it I know that my lining was really good that cycle. I also have had to take Clomid. Higher doses of Clomid are associated with thin linings. I am on a low dose so it hasn't affected me. There are so many things to keep in mind. I am grateful for options though. I really do feel that without medical assistance I would likely not be able to get pregnant. Dealing with 3-4 week periods is incredibly frustrating!! It is much harder to ttc when you have half as many chances in a year. It is almost impossible to know when the timing is right.

I am sorry to hear your husband doesn't really understand the emotional impact of m/c. It is tough for men to fully understand as they do not go through the process in the same way. Feeling the changes in your body, having the hormones affecting things, having the go through the pain and the bleeding all make things so much more real. It isn't something that you can get over in a few weeks and move on like nothing ever happened. My husband is very solution focused. He likes to find the way to fix the problem and move on. It is hard for him to understand me being upset and him not being able to offer a solution to fix it and move on. He also didn't have the same attachment to the baby that I did. He was excited about it, he really wants to have kids, but when we lost the baby he was very practical about it and is just looking to the next step and where to go from here. As much as he tries to be supportive, he just doesn't understand how I feel. It is so amazing to have a group of people to talk to that do understand exactly how I feel. It isn't about dwelling on things or being stuck in a negative place. It is about getting those feelings out and finding hope in success stories from other people. You can definitely come here and talk to us when you are not feeling happy or need to vent. It is a normal part of the healing process.

Sweetmomma - So glad to hear your numbers are so good!! I can imagine you must feel so relieved to have gotten past the time of your last loss!!

I completely agree with Angel. Your success give me hope too!! I absolutely think you need to stay part of this thread. I hope we all stay in touch and keep each other updated on our journeys (even after we all get pregnant again!!).

Stef and Megan - Hope you are both doing ok!!

Phew....that was a long one!! I really need to post more often so I don't have so much to catch up on!!

 

[angel2010]

I've added you in my signature now sweetmomma with a flashing BFP, yaaaayyy! Hope that's okay!

Me too.

 

[jennc]

AFM: I am on my lunch break from my orientation day. The people at orientation are nice, but none work in my department so I'll never see them again. We have been going over benefits all day so it is pretty boring. I came home as it was close (and I wanted to let the dogs out), but now I have to go back. Sorry if I've missed anyone.

Aren't orientation days the worst!!

Now he calls BnB my ‘internet porn” lol! He’ll see me online and say “whatcha doing?” and I respond, “oh, u know, just my internet porn” lol!

MY DH also doesn’t like me crying--and I am such an emotional person and cry at the drop of the hat! I hate it!! I refuse to watch sad movies because I cry! He also wants me to be happy, all the time, like ur DH. They feel uncomfortable and just want to ‘make things all better’. I hope that your DH comes around to understanding and supporting you in doing the things that make you feel better, even if he doesn’t understand or agree with it all. Thank goodness you have your mother to vent to--at least she understands, I’m sure. Big hugs to you!!! I hope your DH comes around soon…

PS-I’m following you on pinterest

That's funny he calls it internet porn lol. It is good that I have my mom but she is not in a good way herself. She internalizes a lot of her problems which has actually literally caused a hole in her stomach. She worries so much about her kids, I just can't bring it to her all the time because then she stresses even more and the doctor told her that if she continued that way, she was going to get stomach cancer. I'm almost thinking I need a therapist for a little while. I've always been told that the best mental health workers see mental health workers of their own. Sometimes it gets so hard to deal with other people's problems all the time. Most of my family just assumes that because I work in mental health that I can deal with my problems on my own without talking them out. Common misconception!

Jenn, have you shown your oh the ttc part of this site!! Where are you located? Your job sounds very interesting. Do you work with a specific age group?
I am not following you on pinterest. Also, when are you ttc?

I live in Pennsylvania. My job is interesting and I love it so much, I don't want to leave it. But they aren't giving me much choice. I'm a full time employee and I'm only getting 19 hours a week. Even without a baby, it's not enough to provide for my husband and me. I work with two 5 year olds and a 14 year old right now. I will be so sad to leave them but my 14 year old may not have hours after May and my twins will be done in June. Yep, I work with two red headed twin brothers. They crack me up when they aren't being stubborn pains in the butt. I've pretty much gone from 4-19 throughout my career. That's why I'm considering psychiatric nursing since I already have a pretty good mental health background.

So it is now cd44. Still no sign of af. I called my doctors office today and talked to the nurse. She said my day 25 blood test showed that I likely didn't ovulate. The longer between cycles the longer af typically sticks around (the last time I had a 50 day cycle af stayed for 4 weeks and the majority of this time it was really heavy). Sorry you didn't O. That would be so frustrating with your periods so far apart. I will pray that it gets better for you.

Ok I hope this doesn't come out cheesy but this is something serious I want to ask all of you... Is it ok for me to still be apart of this thread now that I am preggers again??? Ladies please be honest. I don't want to hurt anyones feelings, You girls are amazing and helped me out alot and the support on this thread is astonishing! The last thing I would ever want is to hurt any of you...

I think all of us fully expect you to continue to post. I agree that it gives us all some hope for the future and hopefully most of us will be joining you soon. Congrats on the high numbers!

I don't know if I have patience. I am feeling quite impatient at the moment. I really hate my body for making me wait like this. Sorry about your bfn. It is still early though so you are still in with a chance!! I am still hopeful for you!!
It is so hard to wait to test. Testing early does not usually do anything but cause disappointment. I will join you in your pact not to test early.

I have been feeling like that a lot lately too. I swear yesterday I was like pacing the house and I had no idea why! I think my hubby will come around eventually. He is also one of those solution focused guys. I really think most are. If you consider history, men have traditionally thought women were crazy simply because of their emotions. They called it "hysteria." The cure for it was "the big O" which my husband apparently picked up on somewhere in his life because when I'm upset, he wants to do it. Not exactly the first thing on my mind, but I usually humor him and at least make him think that made me feel better.

 

[Meli_H]

Hey Jenkb!

Yes, they’ve made fantastic progress on our yard, but rain is forecast for tmo and Friday, argh!!!! I’m going to have a huge mud pit for our front yard. So sorry to hear of all your issues with your cycle…I really don’t know how you do it. You must really have some patience for that, so not testing early during the tww should be a piece of cake for you, riiigghhttht? (I’m trying to be positive here) lol.

I liked the words you offered to jennc, about the issues she is having with her DH. I couldn’t have put them better myself!

Vegas,

You know, I thought more about your adoption question, and I don’t think I can adopt. I know there are so many children out there that need a good home, but I’m not sure if DH would want to adopt, nor do I think I would either. Part of the reason is because DH already has a 20 y/o daughter (she’s away at college and is pre-med) and a 14 y/o son. I don’t really know his DD, since she was never part of his life after he got divorced when she was 5 y/o and his ex-wife moved across the state with her, long story it was a horrendous custody battle but needless to say, there wasn’t a great relationship with her. Since she went away to college and has been away from her mother’s influence, she seeked out DH and they have had a great relationship). We have primary (80% custody) of his DS. I’ve been in his life since he was 2 y/o and have watched him grow up, and heck, helped raise him! He is a wonderful little boy/young man. The greatest EVER! He is so loving, and thoughtful, and sweet, and empathetic, and agreeable, and mellow. I cant say enough good things about him, I am so blessed to have him in my life. I am the middle child, and have 2 brothers. My younger brother has a 13 y/o boy, 11 y/o boy, and 7 y/o girl. I LOVE my niece and nephews to death. They love to come over and spend the weekends with us, we do lots of fun things together. Some backstory-my younger brother and I resemble each other very strongly, my friends always said if you put a mop on my brother’s head to resemble long hair, that would be me lol! Anyways, when we found out he was having a girl, I was just a little sad, and told my mom, “I am the only girl in the family! I refuse to be dethroned from my special place! The only one I wouldn’t feel bad in dethroning me would be if I had a little girl” lol! Then a few days later, I told my mom “Wouldn’t it be funny if this baby looks like me? If I never have a DD, at least we’ll know what she would have looked like” I was just being silly. Well, turns out from birth, this little girl looked JUST like me. She is such a doll, beautiful sweet personality, and literally is my mini-me. People always assume she is my DD, and they say she looks nothing like her mother! Too funny--genetics, and how they all work themselves out….
Sorry to ramble, but I guess my point is that I am perfectly content to help raise my 14 y/o SS, and to spoil and baby my niece and nephews, and be the best auntie ever! If I was not meant to have a baby, I don’t think I would chase it. I’m glad you asked that question-it forced me to think about it….

Sweetmomma,

How thoughtful of you to ask, I would love for you to stay on this thread, I, myself, don’t.want.to.ever.ever.leave.this.thread lol!! Please stay!!!!!!

AFM,
currently 10DPO, I am ashamed to say that I broke down and tested this morning..again…of course another bfn… I only tested today because fertility friend said I had a triphasic chart, and it got me all excited, I swear I swear I swear that’s the only reason why I broke down this morning and tested lol! Stupid FF! If not for her, I wouldn’t have caved (yah, right). I know a triphasic chart doesn’t mean you are pg, and I know that you can be pg without a triphasic chart, but FF and I just HAD to go there….Not to mention that I am so NOT having any noticeable cramping or ovarian twinges at all! All is quiet down there and seems like there’s not much going on in my lil old uterus