Lack of intimacy & dtd

[Zeri]

Briss- yes, totally! It's great that you're feeling more positive. Just think- just the other day there was a little embryo dividing inside of you! Hopefully the next time it will be a sticky one!

Nobump- it was Briss who had gotten Af... Its no due for me for a week and a half. With no Bd I guess she'll arrive on schedule though. That's good your managers were supportive about your appts. Did Your Oh do the sample after all?

Jax- ugh! Missing Bd on Clomid cycles is the worst. It sucks to have taken meds and get no action at all. Maybe Ivf would also do the trick for you. In emailing the Iui clinic to get info I mentioned I was concerned about my age (37) and she agreed I needed to be active about conceiving before time ticks away. She was wonderfully supportive and I feel more hopeful now that I've made contact.

Viccat, how're you feeling?

 

[nobump]

Zeri sorry for getting confused with events and names.
On route to appointbent now, nervous. Management don,t know only HR, read the forms through a bit more. AMF test could take up to 4 weeks to come back so will thinking I,ll try to wait until after my end of year review before saying anything about needing time off.

 

[nobump]

Appointment was good. Treatment scheduled for February, but scan showed a small cyst on one ovary and a pollup un the lining of my womb so need a hsg, so just need to get that scheduled. OH SA was odd everything bar the quantity looked good. Only 3 mill, test in March this year had it up at 37 mill, don't understand. Depending on numbers, may need to look at ICSI which scares me more.

It was me that turned hubby down on Saturday, was a bit tender from the scan.

How is everyone else?

 

[nobump]

Appointment was good. Treatment scheduled for February, but scan showed a small cyst on one ovary and a pollup un the lining of my womb so need a hsg, so just need to get that scheduled. OH SA was odd everything bar the quantity looked good. Only 3 mill, test in March this year had it up at 37 mill, don't understand. Depending on numbers, may need to look at ICSI which scares me more.

It was me that turned hubby down on Saturday, was a bit tender from the scan.

How is everyone else?

 

[Briss]

nobump, 37 mil is fantastic! maybe the previous SA was just a one off? I do not think they need to do ICSI with such a high count. what was his morphology?

afm, have been arguing with DH a lot, he continues with his beer and it just feels hopeless. my cycle is not quite normal after the chemical. the temp is way too high. Am approaching O but we have not BD since EC! he wanted to BD on Saturday when we had a guy doing repairs in our flat! me feeling uneasy about that turned him on but I just could not do it, realistically the guy could walk in at any moment. now he is saying that I rejected him so he is not feeling like BD anymore.

 

[viccat]

Jax - I would definitely say it is worth starting to at least explore the IVF path, even if you don't eventually follow it. I found that my OH responded much better once we started our appointments to find out about IVF - I think it made him realise that I was serious. Unlike some other OH's he actually preferred the idea of DTD than having to provide samples at hospital. Or perhaps I should say DTD was the lesser of the two evils

Nobump - glad to hear HR were good about it, and things are progressing.

Briss - sorry to hear about your bloody minded DH. Mine has said similar stuff at times - if I mentioned lack of BD he would be sure to point out the (rare!) times I had turned him down. Gah, men! Am I right in thinking you have a review appointment in November, at which you decide next steps?

Zeri - I've had those months and it sucks

AFM - thanks to everyone who has asked after me. I really don't want to upset anyone by keep coming on and talking about what's happening with me though, that's why I've dropped off the thread a bit. I used to be on a thread where everyone got pregnant, and the conversation turned from TTC to pregnancy chat, and I stopped wanting to read it ...... so I'm trying not to do the same here. Suffice to say, all is going fine so far, and I am happy to chat more to folks if you want to PM me

[I will say though pregnancy has killed my sex drive, and at this point in the process, having an OH who is happy without sex is a blessing ]

 

[Zeri]

Viccat- glad to hear all is well!

Nobump - 37 to 3 million is a big drop. What would be the reason do that? Are you going to repeat the SA?

Briss- ugh! Bad DH!!! Does he think that he's off the hook so he can drink as much as he wants? His sperm still needs to be healthy. When are you going to try Ivf again? Would you or your Dh ever consider donor sperm?

Afm- 13 dpo and Af seems to be on the way. No surprise as there was no Bd. looking fwd to moving fwd in a fresh cycle!

 

[Briss]

Hi ladies,

i managed to get 2 BD sessions out of DH this cycle but the one closer to O had to be with me on top cos he was just not into it at all so not sure how much use it was. Anyway with his SA I am not holding my breathe for natural TTC. I booked an app with a gyno next week to discuss things that are not going right after the IVF and then the following week I am going for my follow up app with the IVF clinic to discuss our next step.

This time last year I was so hopeful that 2013 will be the year I have my child and the year before that i still remember being optimistic. This year I do not even know I am not thinking that far ahead anymore and trying to take it day by day

 

[Zeri]

Are u doing Ivf for your current cycle, Briss?

How's everyone else doing? It's been a while...

 

[Briss]

Zeri, yes we started our second IVf and this time the clinic suggested stims but unfortunately with my high FSH my ovaries are not responding well to stims so far only two out of 10 follicles have grown, yesterday they increased my dose twice and am due for another scan tomorrow. DH was trying to stay away from the beer but cant say he was very successful, it's also been a nightmare trying to force him to take any supps, I had to resort to crushing vits and mixing it in his food… at the moment just hanging in there hoping for the best

how's everyone doing?

 

[Zeri]

Best wishes for your scan, Briss! Let us know how it goes. Hope you show a tietter response this time. I'm sorry your DH is still drinking so much.. Hopefully he still has a good enough sperm count. They don't need a particular sperm count for ivf, right?

Hope everyone else is doing well! AFM - really confused with this cycle. I got my opks late (CD18 - same day that I usually O) but they've been negative so far. I'm not sure if I O'd yet or am still to O. Still testing, so will see how it goes.

 

[nobump]

Briss, good luck with you IVF cycle.

Zeri, is your cycle making any more sense?

AFM, feeling a lot more positive and relaxed, finally have some progress, have started down the private option the Hysteroscopy, seen someone at Bupa, for initial consult, booked in for Tuesday. Consultant said this could be the reason why I had seen some spotting in my urine earlier, hopefully once the polyp is removed, my cycles will be better, bleeding and pain are draining. Who knows the polyp may have been preventing implantation, who knows, but this gives us the best shot for IVF in January. Spending my time looking in on assisted conception, trying to see what will happen once it all starts.

How is everyone else?

 

[Briss]

nobump, that sounds very positive. a friend of mine got pregnant a couple of months after she had her polyp removed. good luck.

Zeri, how's your cycle going?

My IVF is not going that well, stims did not work for me and I only developed 3 follicles. Today at EC it turned out that one egg ovulated early so we missed it, one more egg was immature and could not be used for ICSI. we only have one egg and hoping and praying it will fertilise tomorrow.

 

[nobump]

Bride sending you good luck wishes.

 

[Briss]

my only egg did not fertilise. they told me it was not good quality. I was very suspicious when they did not give me meds for the entire 2 weeks just for a few days. I guess they already knew that the chances of fertilisation were slim but did not tell me. strange after all this talk on how great my blood flow was and that I am to expect good quality eggs. The embryologist mentioned that the meds might have affected egg quality because my egg was of good quality on the previous natural cycle. maybe the one they missed was the only good one this cycle. My husband blames the clinic, 6K down the drain + me having to go through the stims and the result is worse than in a natural cycle. It's the end of the road for this cycle. this is going to be the hardest TWW ever with no hope whatsoever. I am in pieces and cant even think clearly where we go from here. totally devastating...

after 2 failed cycles, DH does not want any more IVF until next summer. he said it's his turn to take the drags (he struggled to see me going through stims) so finally agreed to see a urologist. I just cannot stop crying

 

[Zeri]

Oh Briss!!! How disappointing!!! I can't imagine what you're going through right now. I always feel horrible when my Clomid cycles are messed up....but going through stims and spending $6000 + only to have no chances whatsoever must be a million times worse! I'm so sorry to hear! Agree that it's probably going to be a rough two week wait. The one thing that makes the tww tolerable is at least having hope of getting pregnant.... I hope you find the strength to get through it. Major HUGS! On a somewhat positive side...it's good that your DH agrees to see a urologist. I wonder if he would also agree to taking something like Clomid? I hear that can be prescribed for men to boost sperm count. What do you think? Do you think he would be willing to try some other intervention before next summer? That's a horribly long time to wait! Of course there's always natural - and it's good that your eggs are of better quality natural than stimmed - maybe the issue is really your DH...and if he gets treated sooner rather than later you'll have a better chance on your natural cycles?

HUGS!!

 

[Zeri]

nobump - that's good that you at least know what's going on now, and some hope that your cycles and bleeding/other symptoms will improve in thething near future. It sounds like you'll be on a good footing for IVF once that's sorted out. Good to hear you've been feeling more relaxed about things too.

 

[Briss]

Zeri, thank you! DH said it's his turn to take drugs now so here is hoping. I booked him to see a very good urologist next week. maybe he can find what's wrong and can fix his issue so we could get pregnant naturally, I doubt it but must have hope.

I am still in shock, constantly crying and in disbelief. At the moment I do not even know what to think and what to hope for. years of very intensive TTC and 2 failed IVF which cost us about 11K. I think I am going to take a break for a while I never thought I'd say it but I am reaching my limits on how much misfortune I can take before I break and want to give up and end it all. I am sure it will pass and I will carry on fighting but not the next few weeks. I might stay away from B&B for a bit because it's getting hard for me and I am literally exhausted and my TTC efforts are not bringing me any closer to a baby.

 

[Zeri]

AFM - still not absolutely sure what's going on, but I *think* I'm in the tww, since my breasts have been somewhat sore for the last week or so, and I haven't had a positive opk since I started testing on CD18. On CD25 today.

 

[Zeri]

Zeri, thank you! DH said it's his turn to take drugs now so here is hoping. I booked him to see a very good urologist next week. maybe he can find what's wrong and can fix his issue so we could get pregnant naturally, I doubt it but must have hope.

I am still in shock, constantly crying and in disbelief. At the moment I do not even know what to think and what to hope for. years of very intensive TTC and 2 failed IVF which cost us about 11K. I think I am going to take a break for a while I never thought I'd say it but I am reaching my limits on how much misfortune I can take before I break and want to give up and end it all. I am sure it will pass and I will carry on fighting but not the next few weeks. I might stay away from B&B for a bit because it's getting hard for me and I am literally exhausted and my TTC efforts are not bringing me any closer to a baby.

Totally understand you needing a break. I don't think most non-TTC people understand how all-consuming and emotionally/physically stressful ttc can be- especially long term ttc. It's like you live your life in two week increments...waiting, trying,hoping, being disappointed...recycle. It's hard...especially when you put so much $ and time into it (like IVF) and still get the same result. . It's good you got a quick appointment for your DH...you're moving quickly on things, and hopefully that initiative will bear some fruit soon - at least hopefully the uro would be able to recommend something for your DH. Keep hope alive. Hope you get soon over the next few weeks, and also a chance to pamper yourself! You deserve it!