***Lion Cub Mommies-Back In Action!***

[cleckner04]

Yeah I'm 5'8" so I hold my weight pretty well. When I tell people IRL how much I weigh they completely flip out because they can't believe I weigh so much. Even at my skinniest with hardly any fat on my body, I'm 165-170 lbs.

 

[Shiv]

Cleck - you can so see a difference, you look great! And you do carry the weight well, another 20lbs and you'll be a skinny minx (as opposed to just a minx )

What did your stick tell you this morning Cleck? Has it changed yet?

And Spidey did AF get you properly or have you tested?

As fo rme, well I went to bed last night feeling so unbelievably sick and thought ot-oh maybe this is what real morning sickness feels like. Then I woke up at 1am and chucked my guts up, then again at 3am then at 5am I started weeing out of my bum (tmi sorry ) so I have eaten something dodgy I reckon. I feel awful but i must admit when I started pooing my main thought was "thank goodness this isn't morning sickness, I couldn't have coped with that for another month or so!). SO I haven't eaten anything today but am going to attempt a slice of toast in a bit!

I forgot to tell you that I told my parents that I am pregnant yesterday after the scan, they were far from enthusiastic which I kind of expected, as at the moment I am not exactly feeling too enthusiastic about it myself either. i just need to know where i will give birth and then I can settle a bit. I am considering a home birth if we have moved by the time LO comes as Sophia came quite quickly and I need for my parents to come watch her whilst I pop out her brother/sister. It will be cutting it a bit fine if we live 2 hours away! we'll see!

well I've managed to ramble on.............off to try that slice of toast

 

[Pippin]

Cleck WOW you can see a huge difference and around your neck in you Avatar. So cool and very jealous, well done. I'm a couple of inches taller and a similar weight. I hope to lose after birth, I'm going to use Bfding to help. Last time I'd eat a whole pack of biscuits whilst feeding as I was so hungry but I'm going to do it the right way this time.

Shiv sorry about your parents hon. Surely they can see this happened before the horrible news???? Mine weren't happy about the one I lost as they thought it was too soon even though they knew it was a happy accident. Really hurt me at the time but they have been great this time. Boo for runny tummy, hope you feel better this evening. Good luck with the toast.

 

[cleckner04]

Thanks girls!! I'll probably delete the photo now.

Shiv- So far I'm still at "low" fertility. I figure it'll start going to high next week and no clue when it'll peak.

 

[spidey]

Shiv- I'm sorry to hear your parents didn't react well. It may not be the best way to think, but I believe that things always work themselves out in the end. So right now your situation may seem bad, but your DH will eventually find a great job and you'll have a nice place to live. A home birth sounds great If they weren't so unpopular here I would have one too- but luckily I have a birthing center near me so I can almost have home births How fast did Sophia come out? Kira took 10 hours start to finish and since I'm planning to grow the next one to less than 10 pounds, I think it will shoot out, LOL. Secretly I want a car birth, LOL

Oh, and I hope you feel better soon. What a relief it's a tummy bug and not morning sickness. I never peed out my butt with morning sickness, LOL.

AF started up heavy last night, so my cycle length was officially 43 days. I'm going to BJ's and buying pads in bulk tomorrow and hope that it jinxes me into getting pregnant next month It would be typical that I buy a huge case of pads just to not have my period for 2 years.

 

[Shiv]

Sorry AF got you Spidey, but you get to have an amazing time with your bro without morning sickness and plenty of . Then next month you will be super chilled out and will catch that eggy!

Cleck - hm hurry and get to medium fertility already

i know my parents are just worried about our situation and once we are a bit settled they will be thrilled - but well gurumph anyway!

Tummy is a lot better today, am keeping toast down now so will be back to normal in no time.

Poor Sophia had a bad night last night with her teeth, didn't get her settled properly until about 2am. Then today she has gunky eyes so need to take her the doctors tomorrow to get some conjunctivitis drops. Last night i could have cried, David had gone out for the evening, and i had no energy (as hadn't eaten in over 24 hrs) and Sophia just wouldn't settle! I hope she is feeling a bit better tonight as i could do with some sleep!

 

[jelr]

Knock Knock I hope you all dont mind me coming in but I dont know where to go at the moment and have probably come at the worst time as it seems to be quiet but I could do with some friends.

I dont know if any of you remember but I had posted on FB that DH and I had a bit of an accident a few weeks ago - Well I had thought that I was going to be on the coming onto FB page with my scan picture today to give you all a shock announcement as I'm 8+4 weeks pregnant from my last period but my nurse had given me an EDD as the 3rd of October as my cycle has been 30-32 days for the last few months.

We were referred for early scans again because of the MMC before Natasha but the scan didn't go to plan today. They found it really hard to find a heartbeat so did an internal scan and still no HB and the baby is only measuring 6 weeks - The doc said that maybe my dates were wrong but i am certain as my period arrived on Christmas day and I can remember it clearly. They wanted us back in 2 weeks but I got upset and asked could we be seen in a week, he said that they would probably have to see me again the week after as they wouldn't be able to do anything next week and that the heartbeat is hard to detect at 6 weeks. I said I didn't care as surely at least by next week the baby would be at least measuring a week more and he agreed to see me then.

First of all I dont know whether he meant that they wouldn't be able to do a d&c next week or whether they just probalby wouldn't be able to find the heartbeat next week. I did think they could pick up the HB on an internal earlier than 7-8 weeks.

Anybody know if this happens often and all ends up okay or should I be preparing myself for the worst as I want to think positive but dont want to set myself up for a fall either.

I feel like I'm right back to 3 years ago and am really finding it hard to think positive and I feel so guilty because at first I was upset that I was pregnant as we weren't trying but that shock only lasted a week and I gave myself a kick up the bum and realised that 3 years ago I thought I would never have a baby and am so blessed to have Natasha and now another little one and I have been over the moon and have planned it all in my head.

I have been sick this pregnancy and particularly this week so is that a good sign or have I been sick as my body has known something was wrong - my arthritis did stop kickin up about 2 weeks ago where as on Natasha it kicked up for all of 1st tri and then again in 3rd tri.

I'm sorry for imposing as I know I haven't been part of the threat - but I didn't know where else to go. I have told friends but am so not in the humour for actually talking tonight but needed to sound off also but can't get the words out to any of them where as it is easier to type. I didnt post my news on the FB group as I felt there was too many in there at the moment and didn't feel it right to post in here as I hadn't been part of the group - even through I am terrible nosey and have been having a read in here every now and again - So I did tell Shiv on a PM as I had actually PM'd her to congratulate her on her news that I read here and then I found out a 2 days after that so told her as she is due the same time as me.

I'm totally lost today and thought I was so excited to come onto FB with my scan picture and announce this evening but now I have that scan pic and dont know if my little bean is even alive.

Sorry for the ramble - am all over the shop - its so quiet in here now you probably wont all see this for days lol

 

[spidey]

jelr I'm here, just being quiet since AF is draining the life out of me!

When you and DH had your 'accident'- was it just the one day? If that was the only time a spermy could have gotten past, then you should be pretty certain about your dates, right? I don't think you should give up hope until you get another scan next week to check for growth. I'll be sending lots of positive vibes your way. SO many things could be going on such as delayed implantation, wrong dates, crappy sonographer, etc... so it's good you pushed for another scan in a week.

 

[Shiv]

Hiya - I'm here and I'm sure the other girls will get on at some point soon.
Hon I think it is a good sign that you have morning sickness, try to stay positive. Did the doc say anything about a fetal pole? i have no idea what one is but people seem to bound the term around as what might be there before a heartbeat?!?!?!

As you know I am hoping and "praying" for you and Jim and your little bean. Massive hugs hon, I am thinking of you

 

[cleckner04]

I'm here too hun. I really don't know what to say. Please don't give up hope. So you have another scan scheduled in a week? They should be able to see a heartbeat at 7 weeks easily. With Emma I had an ultrasound at 8 weeks and it was a full blown formed little baby in there. I'll start praying for you hun.

 

[Pippin]

Awww hon I am here too My heart has done a few thousand leaps while reading your post. I'm sorry you aren't buzzing with better news right now. First of all I'll say this is sadly what happened to me just before this one. I went in at 7+4 and baby only measured 5+ weeks no HB, two weeks later and two epu scans later I had the D&C HOWEVER.....BUT...... I've done a few quick sums bare with me......... My cycle is 26 days and I ma always put forward three or four days. Your cycle is roughly a week longer which means you could be only 7+ weeks, plus late implantation (with this one my positive didn't come until days later than it did with Sam) that cold knock a few more days off you gestation meaning 61/2 weeks or so. It's normal for a HB to start between 6-7 weeks so really you could just be too early. Also I know of a girl who posted in second tri last week asking whether it could be possible that she was but back THREE WEEKS and is a healthy 17ish weeks pregnant. It can happen, if numbers take a little longer to rise and egg implants later it's totally possible that baby is just still growing. I don't want to get your hopes up as I know how this can end but I want you to see there is hope. As for symptoms mine disappeared when the baby stopped developing so the fact you have had some is good news and hold onto that. Every pregnancy is different so maybe your arthritis isn't a good sign. x

I know you've been through the D&C if comes to that but I have too so always here if you need to talk about it or ask questions to refresh your memory.

Big hugs honey we are all here for you and I am keeping every part of my body crossed we have a good outcome in a weeks time.

edit: AND DON'T FEEL GUILTY! But I went through the same emotions as ours was an accident (the one I lost) but it doesn't make it any easier I know. I can now see that I wouldn't have my little girl growing in me now if it wasn't for that little bean

 

[Pippin]

Out of curiosity hon did they tell you how big the baby is?

 

[jelr]

Thanks a million girls.

Spidey: Yep it was the only time we weren't careful so I am pretty sure of the date in that sense but am hoping that maybe I could have had a long cycle - usually my cycles can be anywhere between 4 weeks and 7 weeks but they seem to clock back into place when I do low carb which I had being doing before christmas but they are still 30 to 32 days but I did test on the saturday when it was 4 weeks since my LMP and the test was negative and I thought maybe I was doting as I was convinced since the day after we weren't careful that I was pregnant but then during that week I started getting the same pains that worried me on Natasha so I tested again the wed after and it was positive and this time I used digis and I did seem to be behind you on the 1-2 / 2-3 / 3+ even though my LMP is only a day after yours so maybe I did have a longer cycle and the sonographer did seem to be trainee as she had to get the other doc to check with both the US and internal.

Shiv: That link you sent me about the post in 1st tri does seem to say a lot about the fetal pole and the trainee did actually say to the doc today "thats the fetal pole isn't it" and that was only on the first US - I must actually do some research about that as my friend was saying today that if the baby is still in the sac it should be okay because on her last pregnancy I ended up bring her to A&E with loads of pain when she was 5 weeks and they though it was an ectopic pregnancy but later found out she was carrying twins and she had lost one and on her first scan there was no heartbeat but on the second one the baby that survived was still in the sac but the one that was lost has shrunk to the end so maybe that is what she meant - that it wasn't attached to the fetal pole or something - I dont really know as I dont know anything about it and am just guessing so will research that now.

Cleck: that is part of why I pushed for next week as I know with Natasha they told me it was 7 weeks that the HB could be picked up on so hopefully the baby should have developed more or fingers crossed we will have a heart beat.

Thanks so much girls - I am feeling more positive after reading a post in 1st tri that Shiv sent me of this happening to others and that a week later - there was a hb and later the dates caught back up - so fingers crossed. The wait is the killer I even said to DH tonight that if this is the end I wish I would just bleed and get it over - even though I really really dont want this to be the end and am hoping with everything that I have that all is okay I really dont know how I will face maybe another 2 weeks of a wait and then maybe another week for a d&c before this is all over.

The last time we had to wait over the weekend and then it was a few days before the d&c and I honestly thought it was the longest and most cruel week of my life - everyone was so good but there was family and friends in the house the whole time and it was like a wake really and it was horrible so I can't believe we have to wait even longer this time to know.

but then on the other side fingers crossed all is good so it is good to wait and make sure rather than them making a rash decision and all is good anyway.

Sorry rambling again. xx

 

[jelr]

Sorry pippin I didn't see your post until after I posted - I know the guilt is the worst part. I do know what you mean about knowing you wouldn't have your little girls as that is the way I feel about Natasha now after the first MMC - I still am heart broken to have lost that little bean but wouldn't give your up for the worst for a baby I never met if that makes sense.

Funny thing is though I have been convinced that this was a boy so am terrified that maybe I can't carry boys or something - Anyway we are not going to go there - because I need to keep posative for the moment.

Do you mean the size cm or weeks - they said 6 weeks and didn't say anything about size but on the scan pic it says 6.5cm if that is what you mean.

 

[jelr]

I actually think it says 6.6 cm / 16 hrz (have no idea what that part means)

 

[Pippin]

Oh my goodness I know what you mean about the carrying thing. I was sure the one I lost was a girl, was convinced, sickness started earlier, very pink feeling so when I lost it that was it.... I couldn't carry girls. Thankfully I am proving that theory wrong. I got the same pink feeling this time but not the early sickness, as time grew on I convinced myself she was a boy as I desperately wanted a little girl if I'm honest. SO firstly you can forget that theory

With the one I lost they told me the length which was 3mm, I'll never forget that as it's so tiny then, hence why it's hard to date that early. The 6.5cm will be the scan image width or radius not the baby. The fact they saw a baby and presumably a yoke too means it's a good thing. I paid for the private one where I saw no HB and she seemed totally fine with putting me back over a week which gave me hope but I kinda knew with the no symptoms. I still think you have a chance so don't count yourself out yet. I know how agonising the wait is, still very raw and the worst bit. I've put losing the baby behind me now I can think back and not feel anything but goodness it was hard at the time. I cried buckets and for weeks so feel free to do the same at us. xxx

Off to bed now, try and do the same. If bean is in there thriving away he needs his Mum to be rested.

 

[jelr]

Just looked up fetal pole and wikipedia gives this:

The fetal pole is a thickening on the margin of the yolk sac of a fetus during pregnancy. It is usually identified at 6.5 weeks with abdominal ultrasound imaging, and 6 weeks with vaginal ultrasound imaging. However it is quite normal for the fetal pole to not be visible until about 9 weeks. The fetal pole may be seen at 2–4 mm crown-rump length (CRL), and heart motion is often detected when it is seen. In the embryo, the heartbeat is seen as a regular flutter, which should be first evident at 5 mm CRL. If the embryo is less than 5 mm CRL, it is possible for it to be healthy without showing a heartbeat, though a follow up study in 5–7 days will almost always demonstrate the heartbeat.

So maybe I'm actually 6.5 weeks and he just said 6 weeks to round it off as they definitely said they saw the fetal pole on the normal us.

Was panicking then because I came across something else that said "Sometimes, with normal pregnancies, the fetal heartbeat is not visible until a fetal pole of up to 4 mm in length is seen. Failure to identify fetal cardiac activity in a fetus whose overall length is greater than 4 mm is an ominous sign" because I was thinking my measurements were 6.5 but then realised the measurements on picture are in cm not mm so maybe they are totally different measurements - but then I'm thinking is it just magnified x 10 and that would be 6.5mm - think I will stay away from google because for every good point I will see something that will panic me.

Pipp: do you know more on the measurements and I honestly need the truth.

Worst of it is I'm off for the rest of this week for midterm - fingers crossed the weather pics up and I can get out with Natasha and keep busy.

 

[jelr]

Thanks pip - Well I hope that theory is the same for me.

Yeah funny thing is DH was a bit sceptical about trying again as he was afraid of another MC and didn't want Natasha to feel the pain in the house that was in it the last time and I said I didn't think it would be as bad a second time because we had her - but I think part of it was because we have her I had forgotten how bad the pain was and today just brought me right back - and DH too. He nearly fainted - well turned grey and felt sick (although he will tell you it is the heat of the hospital) but the same thing happened when they took my blood on the 1st MMC so I think it is just the way the upset affects him and today when I was convinced it was over I thought I just need to see Natasha and will feel better but felt worse because every time I looked at her I felt such a pang of pain because it felt like I knew what I was losing if that makes sense - where as before I didn't know how strong the love for a child.

Anyway I'm not going to think that way and just focus on the positives because I have to stay strong for Natasha and for little bean if he / she is okay.

Bed sounds like a good idea pippin as it has been an extremely long day. Thanks girls and hopefully a good night sleep will help too. xx

 

[cleckner04]

I know how hard it is too. I will never have a worry free pregnancy after what happened before Emma. I still grieve to this day for my lost baby. Nothing will ever take that away. I have a strong suspicion that it was a boy too. We even named him Cameron so he's a real person to us. Not just a ball of cells like the doctor said.

I truly hope everything will turn out positive for you. You have all of us here rooting for you.

 

[Pippin]

How are you feeling this morning Jelr?