Looking for TTC buddies

[Mom15]

I'm trying to speed up time for everyone, so some of you make it through the first tri fast and I get to try soon. I may have already mentioned it, but I'm setting my target date to try for around sept. 8 (given my cycles are regular).

 

[ladyapril777]

11 dpo today, symptoms are boobs are huge/sore , I'm extremely tired and emotional.. don't think this is my month, but we will see I guess

 

[karoolia]

Mom15 that's great! That really isn't only a little over 2 months away! Exciting!

lady april I'm still hoping for you!

 

[Mom15]

Yes! It feels good to have a date in mind. I looked back at my charts and can't help but wonder if the cp I had had an influence on my mc. The cp cycle (as a reminder I had positive tests for 6 days while also having my period) my period was 7 days long with 4 days of spotting. My typical period is 5days with two days of spotting. So there was definitely sth going on and in addition to that my sonogram showed I had something retained, but since my hCG was negative my doc wasn't worried about it. I just can't shake that feeling that it is linked especially as baby had implanted where the retained stuff was. Anyway nothing I can change now, but it does make me feel ok with waiting a couple of cycles to make sure everything is back to normal in my uterus. I'll be starting my Mayan abdominal massage tonight as it can help clear out the uterus and help with good blood flow. I am happy that my period although very chunky had a normal length as I only spotted today. Expecting that to continue for a day or two but hoping for some cm to return as I have seen some sort of blood every day for the last 34 days.

 

[Sweetkat]

The problem with wanting a rainbow and testing early is that the wait is soooooo long. I first tested positive on 9 June (15 days ago at 3&1!!!). And now here I am at just 5&2 and it's ages to wait until anything - I normally go for a scan at 6&3. In fact with my last loss I went at 6&3, 7, 8 (all great although for 6&3 and 7 baby did measure two days behind), perfect scan at 8 weeks and then at 10&2 no HB . The lady could even tell from the scan that it was most likely Down's which is what it did turn out to be.

So now I won't be able to relax ever, not even if I have a good 12 week scan...

Fx for all of us.

 

[MrsD140810]

Sorry to hear that Sweetkat, how awful. I know the feeling. After my first miscarriage I found extra scans so reassuring. Last time I had a scan at 8 weeks and everything looked great. The baby died a few days later. In the UK you are normally only first scanned at 12 weeks unless you book a private scan or go to the early pregnancy unit. I'm currently deciding what to do for the best. I think I might ask for a scan at 8 and 10 weeks but just not get my hopes up. Will you still have the scans? It's horrible isn't it,
feeling like you've been robbed from enjoying your pregnancy.

The problem with wanting a rainbow and testing early is that the wait is soooooo long. I first tested positive on 9 June (15 days ago at 3&1!!!). And now here I am at just 5&2 and it's ages to wait until anything - I normally go for a scan at 6&3. In fact with my last loss I went at 6&3, 7, 8 (all great although for 6&3 and 7 baby did measure two days behind), perfect scan at 8 weeks and then at 10&2 no HB . The lady could even tell from the scan that it was most likely Down's which is what it did turn out to be.

So now I won't be able to relax ever, not even if I have a good 12 week scan...

Fx for all of us.

 

[Sweetkat]

MrsD I am in London, so the scans were all private. I don't know what to do any more.

I suppose if the scan is bad at 6.5 weeks then at least I will know. I had that with my second miscarriage and then had to go back another 3 times because even though the pregnancy wasn't viable, they wouldn't give me the pills so I had to wait for the HB to stop.

That was just awful because I was pregnant for a further 2 weeks knowing there was no chance of a baby . I ended up miscarrying naturally and actually it wasn't bad physically. But just the thought of going through it all again is awful. So I am sort of pretending that I am pregnant but not really pregnant until after 12 weeks. Because it could easily be a loss

Will you have early scans?

 

[loves_cookies]

MrsD and Sweetkat, I can completely relate. I had a scan at 9 weeks where everything looked great and was discharged from EPU. GP referred me back a week later because the spotting hadn't stopped and no HB. It caught me so off guard as I thought everything was okay having already had a scan. I remember I had spotting during my first pregnancy and I was so reassured with a scan at 6 weeks which showed a HB, I don't think it even occurred to me that something could still go wrong.

When I get pregnant again I will go for scans if I get spotting/bleeding. I don't think I'll pay for a private scan if I don't because it won't provide the reassurance I'll need.

I have another question probably mostly for UK ladies who had hospital treatment, but open to all opinions. Have any of you been tempted to put in a complaint about your miscarriage treatment? My GP says I should, but I'm not sure I want to write it all down. But at the same time I can't stop thinking about it.

Lastly I'm 7dpo I think now, only symptoms are that i've become really bloated these last 48 hours and I keep getting poking prodding pains low down, mostly on my right side, sometimes on my left.

 

[karoolia]

I think I was 3 weeks + 3 when I got my first faint positive this week at 8dpo, but I know I ovulated on CD17 so probably more like 3w +1. It's so crazy early. In my area none of the OBs will even speak with you before 10 weeks unless there is a very good reason to (like you have a really weird complication or have had 3+ miscarriages). I asked my OB if I should come in earlier next time since I had a mmc and he said no.

I didn't think I was treated well with my miscarriage. My OB was good, but the nurse in his office was terrible. Then for my follow-up after my D&C I felt completely ignored and like my time was wasted. Nom scan to check for retained product, no blood work to check HCG. He just said if I don't have a period for 3 months it probably means something went wrong and to come back then.

My husband is a GP finishing his training here and he says all the OBs are like that and the one we chose is the one he likes the best. So as much as I wasn't happy I don't feel like there is much point to complaining.

My aunt told me that she always felt like they didn't care when she miscarried. She said it wasn't until she started going to fertility clinics that she felt anyone cared about her feelings and concerns. She was in a completely different town in Canada. So I'm thinking that's just the way it is often.

 

[karoolia]

Could you ladies lend me your eyes. I have been testing everyday and I think my line is progressing nicely, but this morning I really couldn't tell if it was any darker than yesterday. I think it is, but it is hard to tell.

I have attached today's test, a comparison between yesterday and today (both pictures taken within 3 minutes) and just for fun my progression this whole week (Monday - Friday).

Do you think it's looking good?

I think maybe the color difference is throwing me off. I have no idea why everything looks brighter in yesterday's picture. It was taken in the same lighting and neither have been altered.

 

[Sweetkat]

Karoolia, your lines are definitely getting darker. Have you tried testing with a digital?

It's definitely not a chemical or anything like that, because you got a positive early and the line is getting darker.

Actually with my last MC it was really strange. I got a BFP very early (a week before my period) but then a negative on FRER the next day and also on digital (and for a whole 6 days after). Then I got a faint positive on a normal test the day before my AF was due.

For those 6 days I was 100% sure I was out and I even had wine as was on holiday. I wonder if there is any link between the hormones not rising as fast and the fact the embryo was chromosomally abnormal??

I didn't have the D&C until 11 weeks though, baby measured 10 at 10&2 scan and no HB.

Also, if there is a chromosomal issue with my current pregnancy, would it have shown on the test progression???

I have several FRERs from the first few days since the positive but now am 5&2 and have stopped testing. I feel slightly hungover (like dizzy and a bit nauseous) but with my DD MS hit me like a train at 6 weeks. So not MS as such now, only a bit queasy.

 

[karoolia]

I don't think test progression can tell you if there is a chromosomal abnormality unless it is a chemical (that is what I was fearing).

It is interestesting though. I went back and looked at my old pictures. With my miscarriage I got my first faint positive at 11DPO and didn't have a really good strong as the control line positive until 17DPO. Miscarriage was discovered at 10 weeks, but baby died at 8. I have no idea if there is any connection there.

I am glad that you see a good progression though! Thank you! I know I sound crazy for worrying about a perfectly good line, but having a miscarriage has really made me question everything.

 

[Sweetkat]

It is very interesting that we both didn't get strong lines until later on with the miscarriages.

I am sure yours isn't a chemical, with mine I didn't get a BFP until the day of my period (and I tested before) and then started bleeding at 4&3. The line was there but it was never very dark.

I wish nature could figure out if sth is wrong with the embryo at 4 weeks, so we would just get our periods. I mean what a rubbish evolution mechanism to have to miscarry? Mind you, giving birth isn't well designed either ������

 

[ladyapril777]

Your progression looks great! That's a nice dark line for only 12 dpo!!

 

[karoolia]

Thanks ladyapril! I know I sound nuts for wondering. I just had so much fear of a chemical. I'm sure I'll just move on to worrying about a mc now, but I'm going to try hard to enjoy this.

sweetkat - that made me laugh out loud at work (oops). I would definitely tweak a few things I think nature got wrong!

 

[Sweetkat]

Not mad at all, for the first two days I was convinced I was having a chemical, as my last pregnancy ended up being that and I have never had one before (at least not to my knowledge) although once I swear I saw a faint line even though I didn't have unprotected sex! Well only withdrawal method once, but my period was a week late. Anyway, to this day I don't know whether that was a chemical too or me going mad

 

[Mom15]

I think it's a nice progression. I too with my chemical didn't get a faint line until day of AF at 12dpo so I wouldn't worry about a chemical at this point.

 

[ricschick]

Karoolia that's a lovely progression!!! I think it's safe to stop testing but it's funny you guys should say that about your previous pregnancy tests I too felt mine weren't getting as dark as they should do I mean eventually they were dark but it felt like it took ages!!! So I think there is something to it maybe!!

I wish I could sleep through the 1st tri! Lol 😂 if and when I do get pregnant again I'm going to be nervous but I don't think I will get any early scan as for me it made me worse and made me worry more so unless I have bleeding fx I don't I won't have one I don't think. Just need to get pregnant now!

Fx ladyapril that you get a bfp!!
Sweetkat I'm from London too! Why do you feel like making a complaint? Sorry if I've missed that. Xx

 

[Sweetkat]

Rischick, I actually didn't want to make a complaint although maybe I should have done.

I am Rhesus negative and with my second miscarriage I literally begged for anti D, which they promised they would give me but then they said NICE guidelines said it's not necessary so after a zillion phone calls they didn't give it to me.

Also, needless to say, the NHS does zero checks post D&C. No follow up scans or anything. I didn't have any complications, but if I had no idea what I would have done.

 

[ricschick]

I find with the NHS their very reluctant to offer anything else and do the minimum! I remember when I was in labour with my 4th baby I'm meant to have antibiotics once my waters go as I have group b strep and I kept telling them and I ended up waiting in the waiting room for 5 hours when they finally took me to a side room and gave me it! Thank god nothing was passed on.

I had no follow up either after my dnc. X