Love,Patience,& Support-Staying tgther until all preggo! 14BFPs! 2 Twins 4 angels

[Yumenoinu]

Here's what happened today anyway.. I was at work. First day today instead of yesterday. I started feeling really dizzy, back pain kicked in like hell and very strong cramps - I was in tears in about five minutes. I sat down, sat there for 20 minutes, took paracetamol, got up and blood everywhere. I was shattered. I couldn't walk, I was screaming in pain. My boss called the ambulance. Got to the Early Pregnancy Unit at the hospital, on the scan, we could hear two heart beats, very low ones 23 - 40, dropping. An hour later, I passed the first big glob of the 'baby', I had an examination, everything was ok, though they were still waiting to see whether I'd pass the rest as after another scan, there was still something there. Thirty minutes later, I felt agonising pain, worse than ever. The dead fetus was stuck around my cervix, it wasn't passing at all and was causing me pain. The doctor basically pulled it out of me. My cervix absolutely hurts. I lost twins. I lost my babies. When the ambulance arrived I got gas and air which helped a lot, but when I got transferred from A&E to maternity, I couldn't use it anymore. I never felt a pain like that before, never.

I was also told my GP should have referred me to the hospital straight away when I had such strong back pains at 4/5 weeks, because something started happening then and possibly it could have been saved.

The moment I'll never forget is when the doctor actually pulled out the dead fetus out of me and she said with tears in her eyes 'I'm so so sorry'. Until then I was hoping it was just a bleeding, then it hit me. I discharged myself from the hospital at 10pm and decided to come home, but I have a scan and a check up on Monday. I couldn't stay there tonight. I feel so dead.

I'm so sorry that happened I wish I could give you a hug, but I'm going to have to give one over the internet instead...

 

[katrus78]

Omg, Sunnii! I don't know what to say. Unbelievable. I am so sorry, girl. I read your journal, you are amazing. Stay strong. Sending you hugs.

 

[Sunnii]

Thank you girls.

I just want to cry. This hurts so much.

 

[katrus78]

Wow, it was twins. How sad. I can relate about 80% to your story of how it happenned. Not gonna bother you with my experience right now, but I can def understand how you must be feeling. Or maybe somewhat understand. I only hope that your natural positivity and determination will take over and you will be back ttcing in no time. let's see what they will tell you on Monday after the scan about how soon you can expect to ovulate next. Being young and healthy, your body maybe recovering in a week or so. Hang in there. We are here for you. Hugs.

 

[Sunnii]

Thank you Kat. It's a very.. bad experience to have. I wouldn't wish it upon my enemy. We're gonna TTC straight away. I want my baby and I'm not gonna wait forever. I should ovulate normally and count the mc as day 1 of cycle 1, that's what the doctor said today. We can start trying straight away as it was an early miscarriage, so we will, with full force. Going TTC shopping on Tuesday. We'll catch that eggy next cycle.

 

[katrus78]

That's right. Zero patience, maximum strategy! You're gonna get preggo very very soon, you know it. Hope your oh is supporting you. God bless you both.

 

[sallyhansen76]

OMG sunni, im soo soo soo sorry. I really really am. I wish there was something I could say, or do to take away some of your pain. we are all here for you, we all care about you and will help the best we can with encouragement or just a shoulder to lean on/talk to.
My heart goes out to you and your OH. xxxx lots and lots of hugs my dear

 

[Cilnia]

Oh no!!!! Im so sorry.... this is horrible :'(
I cant believe im actually reading this.. wish i could do something.. a very big hug to you and your OH.

 

[Sunnii]

Thanks girls

 

[LouiseSix]

Dear Sunnii,

I am so sorry to hear about your loss. My thoughts are with you and your partner xxx

 

[Sunnii]

Thank you.

I just got back from shopping, im off work until Tuesday, after my check up.

I ordered 50 opks & 50 pregnancy tests along with a tub of preseed. Doing the rest of the baby TTC shopping on Tuesday and getting on with this I'm expected to ovulate in about 2 - 3 weeks. Back on Agnus Castus today too. I still feel so dead I've been crying on and off, I burst into tears in Tesco's when I walked past the baby aisle.

 

[sallyhansen76]

Give yourself time, you are allowed to feel like this. Its perfectly normal to feel as you do. Although i wish you didnt have to live through it. Im sending you lots of hugs hun!!! xxx

 

[Sunnii]

It all just hit me today, I've lost my babies.

I'm waiting until the bleeding is gone & we're gonna start TTC right after. Generally, I should ovulate before my first AF, I'm also more fertile so I'm gonna be super prepared this time, even more than last time. I'll get my sticky BFP soon

I'm sorry for being such a downer in the group since yesterday How is everyone feeling?

Jaa, how's your pregnancy going?

 

[Laura617]

Hi all.

I haven't had much of a chance to come on here the last couple days and have to say as soon as I caught up I was in tears. Sunnii I am so sorry. I know that saying sorry doesn't make anything better but I feel really awful about what you went through. I hope you are able to concieve again soon and wish you and DH lots of love and strength at this time.

I had a MC years ago and I had no idea I was pregnant until it was over. I was crushed, I spontaneously cried for weeks. So I cannot even imagine handling it when you have known and loved them already. Sending you lots of hugs hun. Please don't apologize for being a downer, you haven't been and you have every right to feel how you are, you should feel free to always say how you are feeling here.

AFM, I'm just waiting to O. I have EWCM so think I am fertile now and hubby wasn't in the mood last night. I could have killed him lol I got an apology this morning saying he wasn't thinking about the timing. Really funny to get an apology from him for not putting out but gotta catch up tonight. Hope I have enough time to get some BDing in. I always worry that I was O early and miss it during times like these.

 

[Sunnii]

Thank you Laura

Good luck for this cycle, I hope you catch the eggy I'm sure if you BD tonight, you'll cover all of your bases.

 

[Sunnii]

I've got a plan!

I got my BFP the first month we started trying and that month I used:

Agnus Castus
Omega 3
Prenatal vitamins for three months prior to TTC
Grapefruit juice (I still didn't have any proper EWCM)
Pomegrante juice
Sunflower seeds
I checked CM everyday
I checked CP everyday
My OH took vitamins everyday too
We both took seperate vitamin C everyday too - helps fertility!
I drank raspberry leaf tea everyday with 2 teaspoons of honey, 3 times a day.
I used OPKs
We BD'ed every day during my fertile period.

This cycle, I'm also gonna do everything I did before, but also use Preseed and eat a bit more calories per day, instead of undereating all the time as that I'm sure didn't help (I just didn't have the apetite) I'm gonna have breakfast everyday as I never ate it until now. I'm also gonna try royal jelly! I heard it has good results Also gonna drink Green Tea, a cup a day in the evening before I go to bed.

If I get my BFP I'll keep on drinking Red Raspberry Leaf tea as it has the reputation of helping to relax the uterus. It is also recommended to help the fertilized egg attach to the uterine lining and stay attached. It is a phytoprogesterone, which is a plant that acts like progesterone, therefore it can be used to increase progesterone levels in the body.

I'm gonna catch that sticky eggy!

 

[sallyhansen76]

Sunni, dont apologize for being a downer! every, like laura said, you should feel free to express anything here without fear of being judged or anything. I am very pleased to see you so motivated for next cycle. You are very strong and I admire you. Good luck, we are all rooting for u hun!!

 

[Sunnii]

Thank you Midnight I hope I can stay this positive. I'm having mini outbursts of tears every so often, but I just can't help it I want my baby and I will have it

 

[Sunnii]

Best of luck to everyone this cycle too! I hope you all get your BFPs!

Where is everyone roughly in their cycles?

 

[sallyhansen76]

Yes you will!

On another note, cil, any clear postiive opk yet?? And anyone else??