@MrsKatie oh bless you, that does sound frightfully traumatic. Hormones certainly don't help with that. I know what you mean about the not pushing, I was told to stop and to breathe her head out but I couldn't stop it. Her head came out like a rocket. It's horrible thinking you shouldn't be doing it but you are completely powerless to stop it. Just get yourself well and big hugs. I'm feeling ok now, almost like I haven't given birth. I've been amazed at how quickly I've recovered. I have stopped breastfeeding though. I'm just pumping for her now. I've had a mare with her weight, having to BF every 3 hours and then pump to do a top up. I don't know how much she was getting from my breast so it was so hard to gauge. Also my nipples are in pieces from pumping and her being lazy with the latch after having a top up bottle. I made the decision to buy an electric double pump and do it that way. I really didn't want to put her on formula so this was the best option.