MAY we all be blessed with baby! May 2013 and beyond (BFFs Seeking BFPs)

[melann13]

Nikkilucky, idk, but I was told once a few years ago that my uterus was tilted. Then i asked my next OB about it, and they said, well, it can go back and forth depending on how tight the ligaments are. I didn't lay on my belly-just put a pillow under my butt like a permanent pelvic tilt. If you think about the anatomy (as we all do I think it wouldn't matter honestly, if you elevate your hips a bit, either tilt of your innards will be downstream.

 

[Hopeful2014]

@RaeChay Let me know when I can update your BFP on the front of the TTC thread and on the BFP thread. I hope everything is going well!

@Lazydaisys I'm glad you're enjoying everything this month. I'm sure it helps. Spinach sounds lovely. I hope this is your month!

@nikkilucky77 I have heard that lying different ways is better depending on uterus and if it's tilted or not, but I don't remember the best way if it is tilted. I googled it and found different answers. I'd recommend trying both ways just in case. I would have the pillow under and legs up straight in the air sometimes and I would lay on my side with legs tightly pressed together at times. I figured it was best to try all options.

@ProfWife I hope this is the month!

@pathos I remember you had trouble with the diva cup. I'm also glad you did it. It might have been just what you needed.

 

[ProfWife]

A friend of a friend posted this video a number of years ago about the journey of infertility she was on with her husband. It's a bit of a tear-jerker, but beautiful. They ended up adopting a beautiful girl.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fkW-4mXJX6A

Praying for you ladies as we pass the year mark of this thread. Some of us are still waiting...some of us are waiting for a second time for various reasons. All of us, one way or another, will make wonderful Moms.

 

[lesh07]

Sorry I have been gone for a while on this thread. I did fall pregnant at the end of november after 8 months ttc but lost it a week later so I have been in the ttc after a loss. Just about to end my 5th cycle with no bfp in sight again....Good luck ladies. xxx

 

[lesh07]

So sorry for your lost hopeful. xxx

 

[melann13]

profwife, the video is beautiful and sadly so true. I have a friend that really needs this right now. Thank you.

 

[Lazydaisys]

I can't even bare to watch that video! Ill just keep ttc. A year since we started this thread, although i know people have been ttcing much longer, lets hold on in there and see what the next year brings xxx

 

[lesh07]

13 months ttc and with 1 loss nearly 6 months ago I am still waiting. x

 

[curvysunshine]

this is my 1st cycle ttc im very hopeful and these forums have been more than helpful with my journey and what can be expected I have learned this is not at all easy but the support offered here is tremendous so yes keep it up and hang in there to all

 

[Lazydaisys]

Sorry Lesh hope you get your bfp soon. I had an early lost and I would have been due this week. As upset as I was at the time I felt sure that I'd get pregnant again and would be pregnant by my the time my previous due date came around. ' May ' we get our bfps. Xx

 

[newbie2013]

Hi ladies,

Sorry I've been absent for a while. I have been on a downward curve in ttc matters and trying to keep things low key. I'm reading and will update my journal soon. I'm CD20-something and had a touch of spotting today. Looks like I'm out again. Never mind... Next time, hopefully.

Thinking of you all. Hope things are going well.

 

[mummy2o]

13 months ttc and with 1 loss nearly 6 months ago I am still waiting. x

I was 2 years roughly ttc Erika, with 1 loss at the 1 year mark. You will get there. It is a long process and a lot of heart ache, especially all the announcements and births between my miscarriage and getting pregnant again. I also had irregular period since then so every day I went over I was get excited over nothing. Just hang in there

 

[nikkilucky77]

Lesh: I am so sorry to hear that .

I know we will be getting our bfp's and we need to keep positive.

 

[Hopeful2014]

this is my 1st cycle ttc im very hopeful and these forums have been more than helpful with my journey and what can be expected I have learned this is not at all easy but the support offered here is tremendous so yes keep it up and hang in there to all

@curvysunshine Welcome. We have a great group of ladies in this thread. I know you'll find support and friendship. Would you like me to add you to the front page of testers?

I look forward to getting to know you. Good luck.

 

[Hopeful2014]

@ProfWife Nice video. It's so sad that so many people have to battle infertility and loss. I'm glad they ended up adopting. I think that's such a wonderful thing. We've always considered adoption. I read a list of celebrities who were adopted either by strangers or other family members earlier today. Click here if you want to read it. You're exactly right. All of us will be wonderful moms. I hope the wait is almost over.

@lesh07 Thanks. I'm sorry about your loss. I hope you get your BFP very soon.

@Lazydaisys I'm sorry that this week is here and that you didn't get your BFP yet. I really think it will happen. I hope the next year brings BFPs and babies for everyone. We will do it!

@newbie2013 I'm sorry about the spotting. I hope you're not out yet. I'm off to read your journal next.

@nikkilucky77 You're right! It's so hard to stay positive, but I know that we will be adding more BFPs soon.

AFM I'm on CD 4 of af (Tuesday). I had some bleeding and then light flow to spotting since delivery right up until af started. It's fairly normal so far. I'm hoping that I get back to a normal cycle. It sucks not knowing what to expect. I started tracking temps again on CD 2 mainly to see if/when I ovulate, luteal phase length, and when to expect the next cycle. My husband continues to be amazing and supportive. We've been talking a lot about our options and plans. We won't know if/when we can try again until we talk to the specialist (after the next blood tests in a few weeks), but we have plans for if/when we can and have been discussing the idea of a gestational carrier or adoption if we can't. It feels better to know there are options and that we will work hard to get what we want. My goal right now is to get in better shape. I've lost all of the pregnancy and preeclampsia-induced fluid weight. I want to get to the peak of my health. I'm also going to be encouraging my husband to get in better shape. Thinking about health is definitely scary after you've been through something like this.

I want to make a few declarations for myself:
This time next year...
I will be in the best shape for my height/age.
I will be able to name ten things we did over the past year that made us happy and that will be big memories for us.
I will be closer to my goal of having a family whether that be by being pregnant, working with a gestational carrier, going through the adoption process, or having a baby through one of these ways already.

I encourage you all to make declarations for yourself too! We only have one life and we have to take charge of it! TTC can be so difficult and heartbreaking. I know we will all be great mothers and that we will get it. I hope the wait is short as it's already been too long and hard for many of us. I know that I'll be lucky to have you ladies in my life over the next year and can't wait to see all the success (TTC and other) we achieve throughout the year.

 

[melann13]

Love the declarations Hopeful!

 

[RaeChay]

Hopeful- I made a list similar to this not long after my loss. It helped me so much to have positive goals to focus on! I still look at my list. This is a great thing to do, whatever stage of TTC (or life in general) that you are in

I hope your doctor will allow you to try again. If not, I would hope that your insurance will cover surrogacy due to your history. I looked up subsequent pregnancies in women with a history of HELLP and here is a study I found:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/12824985/

So it's a relatively smaller study group, but it sounds as if chances of recurrent HELLP is small, percentage-wise. You would likely be placed on anti hypertensives. And getting into the best shape of your life pre-conception is a very good plan! Develop a love for jogging get some cute workout clothes, join a gym.
We are all rooting for you

 

[Hopeful2014]

@RaeChay Thanks for looking that up! One fear is developing HELLP again. They told my family that I was maybe 1-2 hours away from not making it. We had to delay delivery until the next day just so they could do the blood transfusion. I am so confused how I could have got that bad and we didn't know until right then. I hope we would discover things were going wrong before it progressed that far next time.

My doctor was fairly positive about our chances of being able to try again, but she said we'll know more after the blood work and after talking to the specialist. She was already talking about things we would do differently such as taking aspirin and calcium supplements. I think everyone is nervous about it since it came on so suddenly and severely. I really didn't have any of the risks of getting preeclampsia besides it being my first pregnancy. I know I'll be doing daily monitoring of heartbeat, blood pressure, proteinuria, etc. so I hope that would alert me to anything out of the ordinary. I'll have more appointments/scans as well. I'll make a nuisance out of myself, I'm sure.

Do insurance companies cover surrogacy in cases like this? That would be helpful if that's the road we have to go. If the percentage of risk to a future baby or me is too high we might choose a gestational carrier. I don't know how I would handle something like this again.

 

[RaeChay]

@RaeChay Thanks for looking that up! One fear is developing HELLP again. They told my family that I was maybe 1-2 hours away from not making it. We had to delay delivery until the next day just so they could do the blood transfusion. I am so confused how I could have got that bad and we didn't know until right then. I hope we would discover things were going wrong before it progressed that far next time.

My doctor was fairly positive about our chances of being able to try again, but she said we'll know more after the blood work and after talking to the specialist. She was already talking about things we would do differently such as taking aspirin and calcium supplements. I think everyone is nervous about it since it came on so suddenly and severely. I really didn't have any of the risks of getting preeclampsia besides it being my first pregnancy. I know I'll be doing daily monitoring of heartbeat, blood pressure, proteinuria, etc. so I hope that would alert me to anything out of the ordinary. I'll have more appointments/scans as well. I'll make a nuisance out of myself, I'm sure.

Do insurance companies cover surrogacy in cases like this? That would be helpful if that's the road we have to go. If the percentage of risk to a future baby or me is too high we might choose a gestational carrier. I don't know how I would handle something like this again.

1-2 hours away! omg how scary. You know, I was talking to a friend about this the other day - how so many women (ie ones that haven't been pregnant yet, or women who have had easy pregnancies and births) think that because we have so MUCH technology now, and we have hospitals and blood banks and medications etc etc - many women (society really) think that childbirth is just this thing that everyone does and you'll be taken care of, and everyone will come out of the experience happy and healthy. Not so, obviously (I wish we weren't so familiar with this fact btw).

While we are a long way from the days (for example) where you would just die in childbirth if you couldn't get the baby to turn while out living on a prairie somewhere, pregnancy/childbirth etc is this very scary thing! Wrought with dangers at every turn! I mean I don't want to be alarmist, but I feel like people downplay this very serious reality. Like "hey, there is this beautiful and exciting thing you are wanting to do, but also - you could die." Sorry again to be so dark. I can't believe still that you went through this.

Do make a nuisance of yourself if the specialist gives you the go ahead to get pregnant again! I can not stress that enough. That is really great that they will give you those proteinuria sticks to pee on. I wish I knew if your BP began to creep up near the end, or if it just shot like a rocket one day. Eclampsia is such a tricky thing. And it is so crazy that that happened without you having risk factors. But I guess it happens, and if it happens, it has to happen to someone. I'm just sorry that the someone had to be you (you'll remember my "why me" rants on my journal. I hope you haven't been affected by the same question! It is truly a useless thing).

As far as insurance covering surrogacy - I have a friend that had a uterine rupture, hemorrhage, and subsequent hysterectomy after the birth of her first child (geez, speaking of childbirth dangers). I know that her insurance did cover surrogacy, and she had twins via that route. So I think it depends on the insurance, and your OB's advocacy - but I know that kind of thing exists. Hopefully it's not just the super rare premium type insurance that does it. But worth checking into...it's not really "infertility" at that point I think.

I know what you mean by not being sure how to handle something like this if it were to happen again. My hope is that you will never need to figure that out.

 

[Hopeful2014]

@RaeChay I was one of those people who initially thought getting pregnant would be so easy and also one of those people who thought that that would be the most hard part about it. The truth is that that's all true for some, but sadly it's not for others. I'm definitely thankful for the technology, the blood bank, medications, and all of those people who worked so hard to help me. Some of those nurses were so kind and I really feel like they saved me. They had trouble finding my veins because of the swelling. Once the blood started going in one of the people started pumping the bag with his hand to get it to go in faster. I am so grateful.

I'm not sure if they will give me the proteinuria sticks yet, but I plan to ask or find them another way. I plan to check everything, every day, and probably multiple times a day. I'll be the first to notice anything that seems out of the ordinary and make sure they do a better job as well.

I wish I knew if my blood pressure was creeping up or if it was all in that one day too. That's one thing that scares me. I'm worried that "what if it happens all of a sudden and I don't know or it's worse?" My last appointment was five days before it happened. There was a time when she had to take my blood pressure twice because the first time the monitor didn't work. She said some of the monitor's batteries were going down or something like that! That scares me too because I wonder if it was reading it correctly at that point.

I didn't know enough about preeclampsia before this happened. Of course I researched all things that could happen and thought I knew enough about preeclampsia, but it was just the basic information you can find. Once I really started researching it I thought back to things that stuck out to me that might have been signs over the last few weeks or so. Enter the "why me" and "what if" rants.