Mid June and July Firecrackers Group Due June/July 2017!

[Girly922]

We have a 'confinement week' here that you're not allowed to work past. Although those who are self employed tend to. It starts the Sunday before your EDD, so for me having an EDD on a Saturday, I legally would not be allowed to work past 39 weeks, however my friend is due this coming Monday and could've worked almost to her due date.

 

[Girly922]

Mumma, dinner in the bath made me lol a little bit! I hope the pains and niggles are at least helping you to progress somewhat.

I've had no more pains or BHs since the other night. Just a bit of an upset tummy, and the most awful wind

 

[PrettyInInk42]

Gagrl - That's so ridiculous. I couldn't even imagine leaving my baby before it can even sit up properly.

Weebles - Going on leave early would cut into my mat leave. And I make more money being at work, so I might as well work.

 

[DobbyForever]

Awww mumma I'm sorry love but how sweet of hubs

Yeah here it's you work up to your due dad or you need a doctor's note, and being off more than a week before EDD is frowned upon. But I lucked out with summer vacation. The ideal would have been the previous cycle but oh well. Can't complain

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Pretty exactly. At my company you work up until your due date and then you get 12 weeks of FMLA of which 6/8 weeks are paid for depending on vaginal or C section. I also have a short term disability plan I took out on my own to help with the costs.

 

[DobbyForever]

Yeah. Mine is work until due. Union gives you six weeks, FMLA lets you extend it to 12. The only paid portion is taken from your sick days (for me that's 20) then you go on differential pay (daily rate I don't even know mine but it's not much lol- sub $221) plus $50/ day of disability. So he'll start daycare at 10 weeks and I'll go back to work at 11. Assuming he arrives on EDD. Even if I had more time, the mortgage payment is $3200, the car $315, the utilities are another $300, and we want to sell the condo and buy a house within five years and there is nothing under 900k where we want to love.. So not having two incomes for an extended period isn't feasible =\

 

[lesondemavie]

Pretty - Just to offer a different perspective. Dads can also take time off (up to 12 weeks under fmla), so you could technically have a parent with the baby up to 6 months of age. That being said, the law only applies if your company is big enough and you've been working long enough, and in most states it is unpaid (here in CA 6 weeks are partially paid). What is legal and what is culturally acceptable at your work place may be two different things (like for Dobby who also lives in CA), and your job is only protected for 12 weeks even though women can legally take more here in CA. I personally can't imagine being away from work for more than 3-4 months (including the time before baby). Maybe when I get there it'll be a bit tough, but I've worked far too hard to build a fulfilling career to get rusty at it now (plus I've only been off for a week at the moment and I already miss it more than I can describe). I know I'll be busy once the baby is here, but I in no way believe that I am the only one who can care for my baby. I will still be there in the mornings and evenings/nights and on the weekends, so I don't really see it as "leaving" my baby. I see it as fulfilling an important part of me so that I can actually be a better mom. I'm fortunate to have a nurturing partner willing to split the responsibility with me, so I'm expecting to go back in October guilt-free knowing my husband will be with baby.

I'm fairly happy with the laws here in CA, but I would definitely advocate for laws that permitted parental/family leave up to 6 months for new babies (split however works best for that particular family). This is essentially what DH and I are doing (only bc DH has that flexibility and his company will pay 100% of his salary). By 6 months, babies have had several doses of most of the important vaccines, and thus have a bit more protection while at daycare. Seems like a good overall societal policy for better health and the greater good.

Actually Dobby I recently realized that some schools don't pay into SDI, so maybe that's why it's different for you? My boss and I worked at a school district when she had her son. She said she barely got any pay, and well the district eliminated her position while she was on leave so she had no job to return to 👎.

 

[DobbyForever]

Oooo yeah I forgot that you can do that with FMLA. SO needs to work. He's the bigger earner and it's a start up so he can't really be gone. They'd fall apart lol

Yeah we don't pay into SDI unfortunately . And wtf that sucks! I hope they had a different job waiting for her.

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

So...cervix is still 2cm dilated, very soft, 70-80% effaced, and she's at a -1 station...and so uncomfortable... She needs to hurry up....

 

[DobbyForever]

Awww I'm sorry. My dog bolted out of the truck at the petsmart parking lot and chasing her down was not fun with low hanging baby so I feel you

 

[lesondemavie]

Oooo yeah I forgot that you can do that with FMLA. SO needs to work. He's the bigger earner and it's a start up so he can't really be gone. They'd fall apart lol

Yeah we don't pay into SDI unfortunately . And wtf that sucks! I hope they had a different job waiting for her.

Um nope. There was no alternative job offer as far as I know. She thankfully had some idea that they were trying to get rid of her, so she had applied to start her own company earlier that year. I left that district and went private the very next month when I found out. We were all working for the Autism Program. They used us and our experience to transition families over to our district program from private companies (bc in-house is cheaper for them), and then once we had a strong vibrant program, they started to dismantle it putting pressure on us to cut hours and say that kids didn't need services when clinically we disagreed. It was awful. I was stress-starving, and constantly felt like my job was on the line bc I wouldn't just roll over. When I left, I took a 20k pay cut and my commute went from 15 minutes to 1.5 hours, but it was worth it just to get away. A few years later, her company was thriving and she could afford to give me a salary and benefits so I hopped on over to her for better pay and a shorter commute. Best decision I ever made. Absolutely love working for her, and I know she'll always put the kids first.

 

[PrettyInInk42]

If you're someone who's super passionate about your career and have someone you trust looking after your kid, then more power to you for wanting to get back to work. I, however, currently have a job, not a career and my #1 goal in life is to be a mom (of more than one child). So, I'll be in no rush to get back to work when the time comes, but I'll do what I have to to provide.

In my province, women get 17 weeks of "maternity leave". Once those weeks are done, there's 35 weeks of "paternal leave", that can be split between the man and woman, or one can just take all the time. Apparently, if BD was to take some pat leave time, his work would pay him (in addition to the government money he'd be getting) so it'd be like he's getting his full biweekly pay, but if he gets money from the gov, I don't. So, he's cool to let me have the whole year and I'll gladly take it. lol

We got together tonight and when I got into his car, the first thing he said was "I just realized you're 9 days away from your due date and I know nothing". I assume he's talking about diaper changing and swaddling and stuff, but that's all stuff I can teach him. We parked at his place and walked a few blocks down to where our local RibFest is happening this weekend and then, on the walk back, he held my hand. I can literally only think of one, maybe 2, times he's held my hand as we walked anywhere in the last 9+ years, so it was nice. ^_^

Anywho, Baby is still sitting low and making my crotch feel pretty sore. I've also started mentally planning our potential FL vacation in Nov. As luck would have it, the Leafs will be playing the Panthers in that time frame, so I guess Baby's going to his first hockey game at 4 months old. lol

 

[Girly922]

Looks like I'm in for another evening of regular braxton hicks, all in my back tonight which isn't fun. But TMI, any of you getting BHs that cause urine leakage? I know baby's head is right down and pushing on my bladder but I feel like my pelvic floor is completely fucked.

 

[Mummafrog]

Hehe always happy to entertain

Aww pretty sounds like you're quite connected at the moment, that's lovely and will help a lot.

Girly - yeah I'm having some problems. They make me feel like I'm desperare for a wee quite often but when I go not much comes and then when I stand up more leaks out. Also if I have a really strong one I think I need a poo and then I try and I don't! Lol.. awkward. I didn't have any leaking with my first and only very minor leaking with this one which is good. Afterwards it can take a bit of time for it to return to normal but with pelvic floor exercises and orgasms (when you're ready!) It should stop completely, if it doesn't you can talk to your doctor, try not to worry too much *hugs* x

 

[lesondemavie]

Totally get and support that as well Pretty . Being a mom is a wonderful goal. Just wanted to offer a perspective where going back to work after three months might be welcomed.

Oh and gag I'm thrilled for you that you can be a sahm like you want to. My mother was a sahm to four and my best friend is a sahm to one, and they are both people I love and admire. I want nothing more than for us all to have the freedom to choose what works best for us and our families whatever that may be.

Girly - I am peeing more often from the pressure, but no leaking issues here yet. Might be because this is my first. My bowels however are super angry with baby being low. The C is gone without this fiber yay, but I'm getting so much gas and if I sit in the wrong way it feels like a painful contraction. Driving is the worst. I'm hoping the change means labor will come soon, but probably not.

I'm a bit down in the dumps today. I was really hoping that baby would come by today - for silly reasons. Happy Bastille Day to those who celebrate!

 

[Gagrlinpitt]

Totally get and support that as well Pretty . Being a mom is a wonderful goal. Just wanted to offer a perspective where going back to work after three months might be welcomed.

Oh and gag I'm thrilled for you that you can be a sahm like you want to. My mother was a sahm to four and my best friend is a sahm to one, and they are both people I love and admire. I want nothing more than for us all to have the freedom to choose what works best for us and our families whatever that may be.

Girly - I am peeing more often from the pressure, but no leaking issues here yet. Might be because this is my first. My bowels however are super angry with baby being low. The C is gone without this fiber yay, but I'm getting so much gas and if I sit in the wrong way it feels like a painful contraction. Driving is the worst. I'm hoping the change means labor will come soon, but probably not.

LesonI can relate to the gas.. it's annoying. I'm for sure pooping more then I have been but I seem to get contractions when I get up from peeing.. it's weird.

 

[Mummafrog]

Yeah definitely getting pains that are stimulated by sitting in the wrong way etc, tummy goes hard and I get quite bad period pain with it.
I've had lots of pains again tonight but they always fizzle. It makes me feel down too Leson, the end of pregnancy and the waiting without knowing when it will happen is really tough.

Can't wait to see our babies

 

[second.time]

I had a lot of that near the end. It seemed like the urge to pee got more intense the closer I got to active labor, and the less and less came out when I went. By the time I was in labor I needed to pee constantly and nothing was happening! Crazy sensation. I think it's a good sign of getting closer ...

 

[DobbyForever]

SO is going to kill me I totally ruined the wall trying to hang photos

 

[Maries_s]

Hey girls! Is been a while since I post something here. Last time I was on bed rest but soon as I hit the 35w I wasn't. However, baby decided to get comfy in my belly and last Friday I was going to be induced (40w1d) well, getting ready for my appointment, contractions started (6:30am), immediately had my bloody show and I went to the office to ask at the front desk what to do since my doctor wasn't there and they send me to the hospital (I went to the office because hospital and office are close together, about 3min apart). Went to the hospital and I was at 7cm (9:00am), they put the IV on, waters broke in one of the cervical check (10am?!), around 11ish or 12? they made me do a practice push and waters completely broke, 12pm I was ready to push and doctor barely made it. Baby boy was born at 12:37pm, 7lb2oz, 19.5in
He is 1 week old today, nursing perfect and gaining weight like a champ. Totally in love with him and very glad that I made it to term.
Oh I did it drug free and everything went perfect, he came out very alert and I enjoyed it.