Mother of all conception months Graduates

[gilz82]

Yup you are totally right. We've had many of the same talks. My OH is 36 and he's been married before and never wanted kids then.

Soon after we got together he said he'd changed his mind and it took me a very long time to be sure he really does want kids and it wasn't just for me.

He'll be a fabulous dad I've no doubt there though.

 

[madcatwoman]

it was the opposite for me, DH was more for having kids and didnt think i did but he never pressurised me at all. Friends started having them and although im not a cooing in the pram person it really did start me thinking, i started to shock myself with my thoughts.

It will be good to tell people, but im also going to have to swallow my pride with a few people too, some of them used to annoy me by saying "Oh you'll change your mind'., either that or they'll think the announcement is a hoax!


IM SO BLOATED right now

 

[gilz82]

Stuff what other people think. You're happy and your DH is happy that's all that matters.

The bloat is so annoying I've got a proper wee pot belly that along with my super full boobs is making me feel thoroughly uncomfortable.

 

[PeanutBean]

I've just completed my form to get my maternity exemption card. Going to take some random book I got from the MW upstairs to read out to DH while he baths Byron.

We had tacos for tea but I wasn't feeling the love. I feel quite indigestiony tonight for some reason. Thought I'd been doing ok with food but I guess not.

I found out that aquanatal is still on and I can go from 14 weeks she thinks. Also there is now free yoga one evening from 16 weeks at our local sure start just down the road (for now no doubt). Just hoping it's not a Monday or I'll never be able to go.

Got an early start tomorrow. Need to be out the house before 9 which is going to be some sort of major challenge! There is lunch provided at the training venue I'm attending and I've been before, there is a restaurant so hopefully I'll do OK for lunch but DH is making me veggie sos-mix sausages to take with me for emergency food and I'll pack loads of crisps and sweets of course! Can't believe I have to leave the house! lol

 

[PeanutBean]

Oh Gilz I keep meaning to say. I can't recommend enough getting a nursing vest from mothercare or somewhere. They have internal support and are so excellent for sleeping in. I bought a size up to accommodate my ginormous boobs but that'll probably depend how big your are normally. I got some vests with support from m&s when I was pregnant last time but they were just too snug for the hugeness of pregnant boobs. If you plan to bf they are indispensable too, I always slept in them, made feeding and sleeping just so much more comfy and they are tight enough to keep breast pads in place so I didn't leak all through the night.

 

[gilz82]

Oh Peanut at least you've got the food planned for tomorrow so at least that's one less thing for you to deal with.

I'm not going to work tomorrow and maybe Wednesday depending on how I feel. I got a major lecture from the dr about taking it easy for the next couple of days.

 

[gilz82]

Thanks for the vest advice definitely will need to get something soon.

I don't know what to do about breastfeeding. I wanted to try but I've been reading a lot about how important feeding is for bonding for dads. If I breastfeed my OH can't feed the baby and since he'll only get 2 days a fortnight with the baby that's not really great.

 

[PeanutBean]

In my honest opinion I say balls to dads and feeding. DH and Byron are probably more bonded than with me and that comes from the Dad being a loving father and taking an interest. I would much rather try and give my baby the best nutritional start I could. I had a really difficult time bf at the start as he wouldn't feed and then his latch was always abominable. But he was born a bit small and gained weight so well and has always been so healthy and I put a lot of it down to how well I managed to feed him in the end. If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out. And it's not long before you will be able to express and give a bottle so if you really wanted your OH to feed he could do so with expressed milk. It's just my opinion. People need to do what suits them.

On a possibly related note, there is an interesting discussion in the debate room about formula companies and the methods they use to undermine breastfeeding whilst appearing to promote it. I wonder if some of the things you've read could be related to that? I truly believe that Dad's can bond perfectly without feeding, without cutting the cord, without having some kind of mythical involvement in the pregnancy. They've a whole lifetime to bond with their kiddies, a few months of bottle feeding is not going to make the difference.

Sorry if I come across too strong, it's all just my opinion of course.

 

[gilz82]

No you don't come across strongly. It was actually the midwife who told my closest friend about the father feeding thing.

She was considering bf after not succeeding with her first and the midwife raised the whole dad thing.

From my point of view bf would have dual purpose. Obviously the baby getting the best nutrition and the fact I won't have to get up during the night and disturbing the baby and the dog etc

 

[loopylollipop]

Totally with Peanut on this. Fathers get to change them, cuddle and bathe and other the things that can help bond. If you cant bf, then you cant but I would never bring the OH into the equation.

BF was a godsend. If DS cried, I plugged him in. Ace. Instant soother. At 7 months he just spat out my nipple and decided no more . That wasnt in my mother and baby mags. There were tons of article on weaning baby off, but none on how not to feel rejected when the decides no longer!

Aw Gilz, sorry kidney playing up already. Urine infections are much more common in pregnancy, lets just hope its a one off and nowt to do with your history - oh and congrats on your sweet pea!

 

[gilz82]

Thanks Loopy only 3 more days til you get yours too

 

[MADLYSBOYS]

:wave: Ladies,

We have had lap top probs so I havent been around a bug infected us but we got sorted now

Thanks for thinking about me madcat and peanutbean!

EDIT: I just spent an hour catching up on this thread

 

[PeanutBean]

If you can bf is just so much easier than all that getting up and faffing about. Easier again if you cosleep!

Well I've just discovered that tacos are extremely unpleasant to throw up especially when they've long left the stomach. See my journal if you want to see all the graphic details! Lol. Like madcat being sick is a huge ordeal for me so every time I do it you ladies are gonna hear about it! I hope you can forgive me! My stomach's doing I don't know what right now and I can't tell if I should eat or just sleep. The only silver lining can be that I might feel a little improved tomorrow for it. Maybe...

 

[loopylollipop]

oh ladies have done something stupid.

Looked up my swabs results on computer today, and noticed they had done my beta HGC levels after all.

They were 8600 (roughly only got quick glance as someone walked in). Thought oh they seem good.

Then of course looked up levels and found they are above the upper limit. And now I am crapping my pants worrying about molar pregnancies etc.

Have looked up tons of stuff and have scared myself to death.

Peanut, you are a scientist tell me I am stupid and over reacting. The molar pregnancies I have read about were MASSIVELY raised, not just over by 1000. Argghh wished I had never looked. Still barely any symptoms.

Was looking forward to my scan and now I feel sick with worry.

Stupid stupid me.

 

[PeanutBean]

Silly! The ranges are so massive you know full well there will be tail ends in either direction that still lead to normal pregnancies. Think positive. It might be twins!

 

[PeanutBean]

Or you might be further on than you think you are. Or the test might have a standard margin of error.

 

[loopylollipop]

Silly! The ranges are so massive you know full well there will be tail ends in either direction that still lead to normal pregnancies. Think positive. It might be twins!

at this moment I would be very happy with that rather than a dreaded molar. The molar thing freaked me out not only due to slight cancer risk but not being able to try for another YEAR!!! Thats like a million years at my age and would rule me outta the running.

Never did see my bloody swab results which is what I was looking for in the first place!

Keep trying to tell myself that these are only derived from the standard deviations of 'normal' and am just lying on the outer edge but the hormonal stressed pregnant woman desperately clinging to hope after a scare and hospital admission is freaking out.

Edit - only one gestational scan seen, with yolk sac and no fetal pole as yet

 

[gilz82]

Oh Loopy honey why do we do these things to ourselves.

I'm with Peanut, I think that after the cycle before you just conceived earlier than a normal cycle. Plus the variation for what can be classed as "normal" in hcg levels at any given point are ridiculously big. You really need to try to keep calm and not get yourself worked up about it as you will make yourself ill.

Hideously hard to do as a hormonal pregnant woman but we'll all be here to help you

Also found this since you'd fall in the 1-2 months category your hcg levels are way within normal.

0-1 week: 0-50 IU/L
1-2 weeks: 40 – 300
3-4: 500 – 6,000
1-2 months: 5,000 – 200,000
2-3 months: 10,000 – 100,000
2nd trimester: 3,000 – 50,000
3rd trimester: 1,000 – 50,000
Non-pregnant females: < 5.0
Postmenopausal: < 9.5

 

[loopylollipop]

Morning

thanks Gilz that really helped

woke to some more spotting this morning. very slight but there, brownish thankfully not bright red.

we dtd two nights ago, which we did prior to my last spotting.

gonna have to keep my hands off him now!

 

[gilz82]

The doc told me last week not to have anymore cos of the spotting until after the 1st trimester.

As he explained it, it was more of a precaution then anything else as most spotting after sex is just caused because the cervix is extra sensitive at this point. Hopefully that's all that's happening with you.