Moving on in the journey from ttc

[brunettebimbo]

MM your look beautiful. Lovely picture

 

[Starry Night]

eyemom - the eye thing is something I'll have to consider. I have 20/20 vision but my DH is essentially blind. I think he has 20/400 or something like that. Basically, if you steal his glasses he can't chase you to get them back. DS loves to sit right up close to the TV and we've been assuming it's because he's excited about his show but you never know. My niece on that side of the family needed glasses at a very young age.

unexpected - congrats on 30 weeks. The 10 week countdown is on! I found the last 10 weeks slow to live through but once I got to 40 I wondered where they had gone. I hope they don't drag for you and you aren't pestered with the "where's the baby" comments.

Mariahsmom - I didn't put two and two together in my last post: Happy 3rd Trimester!!

afm - it's 4am and I think DD is settling from her nighttime feed. Bedtime usually takes about an hour so I was expecting a fight again but she seems to have gone right back to sleep. I think it's odd how much she needs to eat in a single sitting. I guess whatever hormonal issues that give me my weird cycles and be prone to miscarry are the same that give me bad milk. I know I have milk as she guzzles it really well and seems to choke on it at times but she's never satisfied afterwards and didn't start to gain weight until I added formula top-offs to each feed. Oh well. I don't mind. It's just odd.

 

[Left wonderin]

Starry your doing a super job I saw the pic of Hannah on the other thread what can I say adorable !! You would just eat her up !!!! So so cute . And I love her outfit !

Mariah yahoooo and welcome to the second tri !!! The countdown to d day begins Lol...... Enjoy every second of every day as you will miss being pregnant and re live them all in your head ..... Yes even the not so nice ones !!

AFM cannot believe how quickly time has gone since Sean's arrival ! He has changed so so much . Blink and you miss it ! He is now trying to pull himself up to sit up as he does not like lying down . He is going to be a messer as takes every oppertunity for a hearty laugh !

 

[eyemom]

Left seems like your little guy has such a fun personality.

AFM, last night I woke up in the middle of the night feeling really crampy. Maybe it was needing to pee that woke me up, but I didn't think I needed to go that bad. I feel like it was the cramps. It was hard to get back to sleep and get comfortable. I had kinda gotten to where I wondered if it was something I should worry about. Then this morning ummm maybe it could have been gas? (Sorry TMI) But still IDK. Before I got up, I felt a kick much higher than I've ever felt it before, but I didn't think much of it at the time. But then when I got dressed...HOLY growth spurt, Batman! Wow! I think that much growth overnight could have been enough to make me sore? It was just so weird. I've had one similar incident feeling THAT crampy (maybe less since my uterus was smaller then). And I had one big overnight growth spurt before. I'm trying to remember if those could have been at the same time.

When I first got up, I thought maybe I should sit and put my feet up and drink a glass of water or something. But just having to get up and move around a bit, I was feeling completely normal. Still feel fine. So still not sure if it was gas or growth spurt or some combination of the two, but anyway. I need to take a new belly pic.

 

[Mariahs Mom]

Awwwww thanks ladies, I really do appreciate the compliments.

Eyemom- two girls sounds like so much fun. DH thinks it will be a nightmare but I'm hoping I have two girls. And I can't believe tags you'll be 29wks in 3days that's so frickin amazing! After that it will fly by, as you know. I'm so glad that you didn't have a bad experience with the glucose, it gives me hope haha. I have my appt at 11:45am so I'm very anxious.

Now as far as your crampy feeling. I've pretty much felt that the entire 2nd trimester! Some mornings I wake up crampy and I was worried but turned out to be gas. I'm sure that's all it is.

Left- thanks and I totally forgot I was in my 3rd trimester. Crazy to think it's nearing D-Day. Seems like tester I felt V-Day was so far away

Starry- you and Eyemom give me so much hope. I hope it's not that bad. I will know soon enough haha. I guess I will try the orange! And THANKS for the compliment. Hannah seems to love the nursing. Pure happiness for her lol. How is it being a mother of two?

 

[Sweetz33]

Boo I see you!!! Lol

 

[eyemom]

Yay, hiya Sweetz!

 

[eyemom]

Okay so a bit of a guilty confession. I thought finally being pg with my rainbow I would calm down a little. And I guess I have. A lot actually. But I still see pregnancy announcements and feel that pang of jealousy when it's a smaller age gap like what we were aiming for. Or especially I find out they're having their second kid in the time it's taking us to get one.

 

[brunettebimbo]

I guess it's only normal.

 

[Mariahs Mom]

Eyemom- Aww I can only imagine. I conceived my two kids
right away and I feel blessed about that but I didn't really have the best outcome with the first It is so hard to see ppl fly thru their pregnancies with no complications but we all have to go thru HELL just to get one. Not fair!

OMG hey Sweetz! How have u been?

 

[Starry Night]

Sweetz - hi! I see you're getting closer to your due date! Not much longer now and there will be another rainbow. Hope all is going well.

eyemom - sounds completely natural. I bawled when I found out my SiL was having a girl and I was already pregnant with Hannah at the time. Also, I have a friend who was pregnant with me when I had DS and now we're pregnant together again (she's due a month after I was) except she's having her third and I've just had my second. My other friend who was pregnant with me and DS also had her second awhile ago (her second is about to turn 2). And yeah, a little jealous. It's getting less now that Hannah is finally here as I have happier things to focus on but I have to distract myself from the fact that it's not what I had planned. I really wanted to be in that 2 under 2 club and now I barely qualified for 2 under 3. I have to remind myself that "it is what it is". And I wouldn't have had Hannah if it had been any other way. She's the rainbow I was meant to have.

Mariahsmom - have you had your glucose test yet? How did it go?

afm - just switching to formula now. Tried it yesterday and my mood was so much better and even DD was totally different. She was only moderately fussy and gripe water really helped with that. She also was more alert and awake during the day and slept beautifully at night (for a newborn). Any ideas on drying up milk? Right now I have a scarf tied around me with damp papertowels I froze in the freezer as compresses. Also taking painkillers. It's giving some relief but don't know if it's actually drying things up as I still leak whenever she cries just before feeds.

 

[Left wonderin]

Hi everyone ! Well I had a major BOLT out of the blue today . For the past few weeks maybe months OH has been saying he didn't feel himself , no interest in anything , constantly tired and lacking energy . So off we went to the docs today LO got 16 weeks needles and hubby saw doc . He has been diagnosed with depression ! You could have knocked me down with a feather as I wasn't expecting that !! I knew he was a little distant but I think I was so absorbed with LO I didn't really pay any heed to it . So here is the hard part ...... I feel so guilty as all I could think of was " crap will this effect me/us ttc ?? As I said before oh wasn't really on board but we hadn't really had the " conversation "

Anyway the doc sent us away to think about her reccomendations of anti depressants for 6-9 months . Oh in shock as symptoms really were fatiuge . Well this afternoon we went for a walk in the forest and had a big chat . We spoke about how things have been and looking back I must have been blind I think I was just too caught up with baby to notice how bad things had gotten . We had a great talk and I also was brave enough to tell him about my feelings re ttc and the fact I felt so guilty even mentioning it . I only mentioned it as I know anit depressants can effect ejaculation in a few who take them. Oh was brilliant about it and said we will talk to the doctor about it when we go back to her on Wednesday . Am I a cow to be even thinking about it when he is obviously suffering ?? But I hear that clock ticking loudly !! I am afraid if we didn't ttc due to this I would resent it forever and take it out on oh ....

Anyone any advice or opinions ?

 

[Left wonderin]

Oh starry apparently cabbage leaves out of the fridge help .

 

[Starry Night]

I'm sorry to hear your OH has depression. Don't be too hard on yourself. Babies really do take a lot of our time and attention and add the fact that men tend to stifle their troubles even from partners so it would have been easy to miss his symptoms or not recognize them for what they are.

And sometimes there are non-medical ways to treat depression. I have yet to take anything for mine and am only now even thinking about it. I find it helps to recognize what triggers the depression and what works as coping mechanisms and distractions. Going for walks and talks together could even be one such way.

And I don't think you're bad for being worried about TTC either. The biological clock is a concern and it's fair to be realistic about it. It's important to go easy on him, of course. Maybe keep in the dark about your cycles, for example.

 

[Left wonderin]

Thanks Starry you made me feel a whole heap better . I guess for now the priority will be getting oh back to feeling like himself after all little Sean needs a well daddy and one bundled with energy

After that I guess we take it one step at a time , of course ill put on no pressure around ttc but felt I had to say it as I was thinking it and its time for us to start communicating again

I will continue to temp , Opk and try figure out what's going on with my cycle pp ( for heavens sake I've not even had a full cycle since LO was born ) guess I'm panicking and need to slow down a bit xxxxx

Thanks so much for taking the time to respond . It gets better from here on in my 60 Opk arrived in the post today now all I need is AF to arrive and get poas

 

[Mariahs Mom]

Starry- Yes I did take the glucose test and it wasn't that bad at all. I enjoyed it (for the most part). I'm glad to say I had a good experience

When I lost my first, the only thing I could do to stop the milk was wrap my breast and cold compresses. It seemed to really work.

Left- OMG I'm sorry to hear that you guys are going thru this. On the other hand your husband is so brave for seeking help and dealing with the problem. Men tend to not seek help. It's definitely great that you guys can talk abt it and express how each other is feeling.

I can 100% relate as my DH, Sean, suffers from depression as well. He was in counseling for 8months and I attended some with him as well. It helped tremendously and our relationship could not be any stronger. The best advice that I can give is "check in"! Not ask him verbatim "how are you feeling" but schedule sometime each day for one-on-one time. Maybe pillow talk or just cuddling. Remind him why you love him and reassure him that things are ok! It's been a struggle for us but things are getting better. It just takes time.

Unexpected- how are you? I feel like you've been M.I.A lately lol.

 

[Left wonderin]

Thanks mariah yeah it was a shock that I missed the signs ! I too think oh is really brave and strong for being able to ask for help . Today was hard on him but have faith it will get slowly better from here on in. I appreciate the advice re the check in and think its a great idea . I'm delighted and comforted to hear that you guys are in a great place now oh is willing to go to therapy - he some stuff to sort out re his dad and his " expectations " nothing was every good enough ! Oh as a result is very hard on himself all the time ! I on the other hand am the total opposite . You failed great effort lol......

Good to hear you had an ok experience of the test . Did you get the results yet ??

 

[eyemom]

Thanks Starry It is fleeting, but can't help the thoughts that pop into my head sometimes, even though I don't want them! I will just barely be in the "2 under 4 club." Even if I'd carried the one I lost to term, I would have had time to wait a year and then get pregnant with this one anyway. But yeah, it is what it is. And when DD2 is here, I don't have any notions that all the difficult emotions will disappear completely, BUT I will have something to see and hold and love that will make it a whole heck of a lot better. It's just interesting to feel like, "It'll be better when _____." (Up til now I might have filled in the blank with "I'm pregnant.") Which is way oversimplifying. Even though I know that logically, really getting my brain around it in real life is another matter.

Sorry I wish I had some advice on the weaning issue. I have heard the cabbage leaf thing too. I've heard it's okay to maybe hand express the minimum amount to get some relief, and keep up with the painkillers. It was a more drawn-out process for us so I didn't really have to put any effort into it. I'm glad you and Hannah are both feeling better.

Left, I agree not to be so hard on yourself. It's a lot easier to put together the puzzle pieces when you already have the big picture. Sounds like you have a wonderful, understanding hubby. I'm so glad he was able to get a diagnosis so hopefully now he can get on a path to feeling better. Now that you know, love him and support him of course, but it seems clear that he wants to love you and support you in your needs and desires also. Glad you had a good talk. I agree may be best to go easy on him right now, but hopefully as you both learn more about this, you'll begin to figure out what will work best for you as far as how to proceed. Sorry you're going through this though.

Mariahs Mom, glad your glucose test was fine! Did you have orange or something else?

AFM, I had my 20 week ob appt today (omg, halfway!!!) and everything was spot on. Everything was normal at my anatomy scan which I a week ago, and I measured 19 weeks to the day. And SCH was GONE!

 

[Left wonderin]

Eye wow what alot of good news ) 20 weeks where did that time go !!!!! Its so exciting ! Thanks for your advice and good wishes , I'd be lost without ye girls xxx Will take it a day at a time climbing this mountain and will get there x

 

[brunettebimbo]

Sorry to hear about Hubby Left. What a brave man for seeking help.

Starry I read cabbage leaves too.

EM can't believe your 20 weeks already. How exciting!

MM glad the test wasn't too bad. When do you get the results?