Multiple IVF failures...what now?

[oneof14]

lucie, I'm sorry to see you here! Yes, this is a tough pill to swallow. Maybe by chance, your beta will be positive and this is just implantation bleeding. I'm hope you get some answers at your WTF appt. keep your head up! I'm thinking about you!

 

[septbride]

Happy New Year, ladies! How is everyone doing? I hope you're all feeling a bit more rested after the break and that we can look at January as a fresh start.

 

[Lucie73821]

Well, miracle of miracles, my beta was positive! I had another three days later and it had tripled! I go for another Monday.

I wish you all BFPs in 2013!

 

[oneof14]

Yay Lucie! I knew it! Congrats and happy and healthy 9 months.

 

[whattheiveff]

Lucie - Thats so exciting! Good luck on Monday!

 

[whattheiveff]

Ladies - Just got an email from one of my best friends sharing her pregnancy news. She was visiting me when I was miscarrying in September and had told me they were going to start trying in October. Looks like they got lucky that first month. Lucky them. I'm supposed to meet up with her and our other best friend in NYC in early February, but I'll probably be in the midst of IVF #3 at that point, and don't know if I'm going to go now. I think it will be too much to handle.

 

[septbride]

Lucie, wonderful news!

Whatthe, it really feels like some sort of sick joke that all these preggo announcements keep rolling in. I also got another announcement from a good friend last week. I agree that a weekend with your friend might be a lot to handle right now. Does she know that you're doing IVF?

 

[L4hope]

Congrats Lucie, what a wonderful surprise!

Whattheivf, totally understand not being able to go and hopefully your friend will too. I also found out another friend was preggo when I went home last week. So frustrating to keep hearing of more preg news.

 

[septbride]

Hi ladies,

I spent some time looking at a DE database yesterday. Are any of you thinking about going down that road?

 

[whattheiveff]

Sept - I was definitely thinking DE before my WTF, but neither my current doctor nor the second opinion doctor even brought it up. When I asked them about it, they both said it wasn't something to consider yet. That said, I know that if and when the time comes, its something that I'm open to. Its always good to know what roads you and your spouse are comfortable going down, be it adoption, DE, or surrogacy! That said, starting to get into the details of all those options is EXTREMELY overwhelming without some sort of guidance. I know that Resolve New England has a 1 day seminar for DE and adoption in February that I'm going to sign up for. I figured that would be a good way to gather information and then decide how to proceed.

 

[oneof14]

Ladies - Just got an email from one of my best friends sharing her pregnancy news. She was visiting me when I was miscarrying in September and had told me they were going to start trying in October. Looks like they got lucky that first month. Lucky them. I'm supposed to meet up with her and our other best friend in NYC in early February, but I'll probably be in the midst of IVF #3 at that point, and don't know if I'm going to go now. I think it will be too much to handle.

I am so sorry Whatthe, I've had something similar happen to me. One of my friends from HS wanted to meet w/me for quite some time and when I finally met w/her she told me she is 5 months pg. But the kicker is, she is single and only dating the babys daddy since May. I felt like someone stabbed me in the heart. Not to mention my other friend from HS got pg on her 3rd IVF, so my 2friends are pg together and I feel like the 3rd wheel. I am so happy for the 2 of them, but its so sentistive an issues. Especially when they complain about their pregnancies.

I understand you wanting to avoid events that involve pregnancies and kids. I pick and choose where I want to go and who I want to be with. I may avoid one of the baby showers coming up as I too will most likely be in the middle of my third IVF.

 

[L4hope]

We have to protect ourselves. I know I said this somewhere to you whattheivf. I am definitely avoiding baby showers and preggo friends right now. Unless I feel like I'm in a good place to handle it which we all know varies from day to day and where arcade in our cycles.

 

[oneof14]

L4, same here!

 

[septbride]

I completely agree that when it comes to pregnant friends, our priority has to be on self-protection. There's only so much we're capable of, and I'm finding that it takes a lot of energy to handle these relationships when I'm already feeling sapped from all my stress and sadness. I'm trying to work through my best friend's new pregnancy and it's been very hard on both of us.

Whatthe, you are so right that I probably don't need to consider DE yet. I need to try to keep my crazy in check!

 

[L4hope]

Checking in ladies! I know I see many of you in journals but not all so thought I'd wake us up! How is everyone doing?

I'm doing pretty good. Actually getting ready to walk into the docs office for my endo biopsy! Yuck!! Not looking forward to it, but hoping it wakes up my uterus to let my embies stick next month.

Hope everones doing well and hanging in there.

 

[whattheiveff]

L4 - Good luck today! To answer your question from Sept's journal, I had surgery on Monday to put a catheter in my cervix. Apparently I have a very tight cervix which made my transfers difficult. I'll have the catheter in for a week to stretch it out so my next transfer should be easy...how sexy am I?? Haha. While they were doing that, they also did a hysteroscopy and endo biopsy. The catheter isn't horrible, but its not comfortable either. Once I ovulate this month, I wait 7 days and then start my estrogen patches, then start stimming with my period. Last cycle was 38 days so who knows when I'm going to get this show on the road, but I really don't care. It will happen when it happens. I'm CD 5 today.

 

[oneof14]

L4, good luck, mine hurt as he was performing the biopsy, but once completed I was fine.

Whatthe, that does sound uncomfortable, wow you start soon, yay!

AFM, I have new consult tomorrow, not sure what to expect. I am nervous and excited at the same time. Not sure when I will start again. I feel like Im not completely recovered from my last IVF.

 

[whattheiveff]

Oneof - Good luck at your consult tomorrow. Its always good to hear a fresh perspective. Forgive me, but what did your current RE recommend for going forward? Also, I noticed you're in NYC....have you tried Cornell? I've read they're one of the best clinics in the country.

 

[septbride]

L4, I hope that endo biopsy was over quickly! Looking forward to your report.

Whatthe, it's good that you got the biopsy and hysteroscopy over with when you did the surgery. Kick all those obstacles out of the way.

Oneof14, I'm with you on not being fully recovered. Good luck at your consult tomorrow. I had my second opinion appt and am mulling my options. For this month, I'm waiting on AF and getting some testing redone (for insurance) and will try for the endo biopsy. We're going on vacation on Jan. 20 and I might ovulate when I'm away, so I may need to skip the biopsy after all. We'll see. Regardless of all this and whether I switch clinics or not, I'll be doing an EPP protocol in Feb/March.

L4, thanks for waking up the thread!

xo

 

[oneof14]

Whatthe, My RE didnt really recommend anything since he knew we were going for another consult. He did said if he were to proceed he would recommend PGD with the mirco-flare lupron. He thinks it may be the embryo chromsones. He did do Kayrotyping blood tests on both my DH and myself, all of which came back normal. My current RE really doesnt know what the issue is, which is even more frustrating.

My consult tomorrow is with Dr. Davis at Cornell. I have read good things, but dont know anyone who had any fertility treatments there. We are completely out of pocket so I am praying this work, I dont know if we can afford another. I've heard Cornell is really pricey around $20,000

Sept, have tons of fun on your trip, relax and enjoy. We went to Napa, CA after my 1st failed IVF and we just had the most fabulous time!! I would say have the biopsy prior to your trip and see what happend naturally! I am trying so hard to adopt a different outlook on 2013. I am trying to be more positive, relaxed. Im also trying a gluten free diet. I will let you know next week how all of that is going.