Sounds like an awful situation, I feel so sorry for kids living like that. I think about what I punish myself for with my kids and the reality is they are loved, they are warm, they are secure and mostly happy.
MW just thinks it will be as fast as my last or quicker. It was 3 hours from first contraction till Livi was in my arms.
Its hard to describe the dilation feeling but it happened with E & O too. I was 3cm dilated with both of them before labour even started. I feel a pain right inside the top of my vagina that is different from pressure of the baby. I might be wrong but I assume its what is happening.