Rant - Feeling so hopeless about sleep!

[Noelle610]

Oh I wanted to add that I posted on another forum that deals specifically with infant sleep regarding Charlotte's schedule, looking for a solution to her long night waking. A bunch of the posters pointed toward her being overtired, since her last nap often ends at 2pm. I know being awake for 4+ hours isn't good, but I'm not sure what I should do since daycare pickup is at 5pm (they were suggested I put her to bed at that time!). The only thing I can think of is asking her daycare provider to stretch the time between her first and second nap, because getting a third nap in is near impossible these days. Not sure what you ladies think.

I guess it's possible they are right, but at the same time I wonder if I'm overcomplicating this. Plenty of babies sleep well without rigid schedules!

Plenty of babies aren't our babies I think trying to space out the naps is probably your best bet. A 5pm bedtime sounds kind of ridiculous, even if you weren't working.

Right?! OK, spacing out naps it is. She usually wake around 6:30am for the day. If she takes her first nap at 9am (until 10am or 10:30am), I'd ask her daycare provider to wait until 1:30pm to put her down instead of 12:30pm. Hopefully if she naps until 3pm or 3:30pm, we'll have less overtired-ness to deal with.

 

[bananaz]

I think this should be called the, "I feel down, please say nice things to me" thread because we have nearly all been feeling low the past few days it seems to me

LOL You are totally right!

And I agree, that doesn't sound like enough naptime. My suggestion was actually going to be the opposite of Noelle's, which was to try keeping her up a little longer between naps. In any case, I think playing around with her awake time would probably be a good idea; if nothing else it will make you feel productive while her sleep sorts itself out on its own

Honestly at least for my own kid I think that most of her sleep habits are determined by factors that I can neither understand nor control. I have spent SO MUCH time reading and researching and experimenting that if it were really just a matter of finding the right set of conditions I'm sure she would be a perfect sleeper by now. Obviously there are some things I can do to encourage good sleep habits but after a certain point I think all of the trial and error is really for my own benefit, just so I can think I'm making some kind of progress. It reminds me of the Voltaire quote "the role of the physician is to entertain his patient while nature takes it course."

Or maybe I'm just feeling extra pessimistic today

 

[Noelle610]

Honestly at least for my own kid I think that most of her sleep habits are determined by factors that I can neither understand nor control. I have spent SO MUCH time reading and researching and experimenting that if it were really just a matter of finding the right set of conditions I'm sure she would be a perfect sleeper by now. Obviously there are some things I can do to encourage good sleep habits but after a certain point I think all of the trial and error is really for my own benefit, just so I can think I'm making some kind of progress. It reminds me of the Voltaire quote "the role of the physician is to entertain his patient while nature takes it course."

Or maybe I'm just feeling extra pessimistic today

Yes, THIS!

 

[MrsPear]

Thanks guys, you do make me feel better! I really don't know if I should space naps out or get them in sooner. A lot of the time though she does have a nap 45mins or 1hr after waking, but the past couple of weeks she has seemed to want to stretch it a bit. Maybe I could try and drag it back a bit sooner.

In the afternoon she does sometimes have 30-45 minutes of 'quiet time' in my arms not sleeping but sort of relaxing and smiling a bit whilst I just rock (got a rocking chair) and ignore her. Then when she starts to get bored and tetchy I just count it as a nap, and it does seem to refresh her. Then other days like today, she just cries and fights and her eyes droop and then she wakes and cries more, so that's when I get stressed. I admit I don't really know how to get her to sleep.

Don't know if she's just quite hard to get to sleep or if I'm not doing it right. I do rock, I turn the lights down, I turn the tv off, I shhh her, I try singing, I try putting her seahorse thing on, I try holding her close and just cuddling her when she cries, I try turning her outwards so she doesn't feel cooped up to get her to stop crying, I try putting her down in case I'm overstimulating her, I try putting her in the sling...obviously not all of them on the same nap but over time I try everything! And then I try to be consistent too haha.

I think Aliss said something ages ago (might be on a different thread) which is, you can spend a long time beating yourself up over 'doing it wrong' and trying to get it right, or you can just accept that it isn't happening right now and not get too worked up even trying to find out why, just patiently wait...so I wonder whether that's the avenue I should be going down! xx

 

[eulmh82]

So sorry... but I remember 6 months was another doozy It did pass.

Agree - 6 mths for us was horrendous - I was ready to leave OH - LO was being weaned and feeding loads! he then got a tummy bug and was feeding massively throughout the night as well. It did pass - which i know you;re sick of hearing. I know toher mums who said 6 mths was bad as well

 

[Noelle610]

So sorry... but I remember 6 months was another doozy It did pass.

Agree - 6 mths for us was horrendous - I was ready to leave OH - LO was being weaned and feeding loads! he then got a tummy bug and was feeding massively throughout the night as well. It did pass - which i know you;re sick of hearing. I know toher mums who said 6 mths was bad as well

I'm not sure it can ever be said enough on this thread! Thanks for reminding us

 

[MiniKiwi]

Mrspear

Noelle - those middle of the night, long wakings are just brutal! We have so far spent three nights in hospital, first night no sleep, second night she went to sleep at 11pm, woke at 12,1,2 and at 4 another kid in the room woke her up... for the day

After seeing me walk her to sleep for 2 hours before 11pm and then back to sleep for 2.5 hours after the 4am waking, the nurses moved me to my own room!

Last night she slept 11-4:30 then 5am til 7:45! I feel AMAZING

I'm so proud of how happy she's been here, smiling for everyone and this morning I noticed she's just cut two teeth! My baby is awesome!

 

[Boo44]

Honestly at least for my own kid I think that most of her sleep habits are determined by factors that I can neither understand nor control. I have spent SO MUCH time reading and researching and experimenting that if it were really just a matter of finding the right set of conditions I'm sure she would be a perfect sleeper by now. Obviously there are some things I can do to encourage good sleep habits but after a certain point I think all of the trial and error is really for my own benefit, just so I can think I'm making some kind of progress. It reminds me of the Voltaire quote "the role of the physician is to entertain his patient while nature takes it course."

Or maybe I'm just feeling extra pessimistic today

Yes, THIS!

Bananaz this is so so true I wish I could save it and keep reading it whenever I feel down! Xxxx

 

[MrsPear]

Awww MiniKiwi that really made me smile saying "My baby is awesome". Joni is too. I'm so glad she is feeling better and coping well with the hospital xx

 

[mrsbeano]

Goodness me girlies, these babies are testing us recently aren't they?! All except Jessica's Lilly who seems to have got a tonne better!

Shadowy - I really hope that this isn't a regression and if it is that it passes soon enough. Just be consistent!

Noelle - I ended up being pretty cold with Quinn when he woke up in the night for ages. After I had checked that he was okay (food, nappy etc) I left him to it. It took 2 nights of him crying for 10 minutes before he seemed to get the message that 3am wasn't the time to be up. I can live with him needing a feed STILL but being up for hours is stressful and torturous at that time. Really glad your MW gave you something to help with your insomnia

Mrs Pear - sorry you're having a tough time. No naps just sucks. When Quinn takes rubbish naps something else is usually a culprit, namely teething. Try a dose of calpol half an hour before a nap and see if it makes a difference.

xxx

 

[mrsbeano]

Bananaz - thats the attitude I have on a good day. On a bad day, I'm the obsessed with sleep, feeling like a failure Mummy, doh!

MiniKiwi - glad you're LO is getting better

 

[stephj25]

hi guys, I keep popping in and out of here because my little Livvy is still not sleeping good. She was up for 5 hours in the night. I am absolutely dreading tonight The waking hourly wasn't nearly as bad as this

I hope everyone else is ok x

 

[MrsPear]

hi guys, I keep popping in and out of here because my little Livvy is still not sleeping good. She was up for 5 hours in the night. I am absolutely dreading tonight The waking hourly wasn't nearly as bad as this

I hope everyone else is ok x

Oh gosh that's really hard. We all understand the dread of night time! I hope that you get a better sleep soon

Noelle- I can't give you any advice about your nap/sleep situation- as you see from my posts today, I am not exactly an authority on that sort of thing! I really thought you had completely cracked it before Charlotte got ill, why do these babies keep throwing curveballs? I hope once you sort the insomnia out at least you might feel better equipped to cope with it all. x

 

[MrsPear]

bananaz you get it SO right, I don't think we will ever understand this mad sleep puzzle. But it will pass, we will get there, we just need patience not books and research xx

 

[Noelle610]

MiniKiwi, our babies are AWESOME! How nice to remember that Finally you got some rest. Hopefully Mia will be back to her old self sleep-wise (or better) soon enough.

MrsBeano, UGH, I know! It's kind of ironic because night weaning was going so well for us and now I wish for the days I could just feed her back to sleep! Unfortunately, I have read/heard that the length of night wakings do increase as babies age, since they're more "alert" and develop separation anxiety. I think being "all business" at night is good advice. I kind of got off track with that as a result of the illness and teething, when cuddles are needed.

MrsPear, thanks... I'm hoping if I can sleep when she sleeps I'll feel better.

Steph, 5 hours? That is torture! I'm so sorry.

 

[stephj25]

Noelle, I found Olivia was fighting naps until I realised that I was putting her down too early. I changed her naps so that her wake times are every 2 1/2 hours. After waking at 8:30, 1st nap at 11pm (waking at 12ish) 2nd nap at 2- 3ish (waking between 4-4:30). Betime is at 7:30pm. She naps brilliantly getting 3 hours in total. Just thought I'd share just in case you can get anything from this...

 

[MiniKiwi]

Steph, is she crying while she's awake for 5 hours? I'm probably just paranoid now because my LO was sick when she started waking frequently and for long periods each night. But that's why my advice would be to have her checked by a doctor if you haven't already. Hope she quits those long wakings quick smart! They really are torture!

 

[stephj25]

I've put her amber teething necklace on tonight and given her calpol. Hoping that will make a difference..

No Minikiwi - she just kind of whinges and talks to herself x

 

[Noelle610]

that's helpful Steph, thank you! I'm going to try it.

 

[stephj25]

MiniKiwi, just read up on what's up with your LO. Just wanted to send hugs