Sensitive kids group

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Tacey- glad things are going well hun, good luck with camping, sounds exciting.

We didn't do much during Eid, we didn't take Omar with us for house visits, we only took him with us when we went to my aunt's place to play with her kids, 1st day my brother visited with his son, the kids had a very good time. Friday my brother took the kids out & again they had fun. Saturday I left him with my brother & his wife while we went to visit some house visits, Sunday we were planning to go to Thomas & the lost treasure show but we couldn't reach there due to traffic, so we went ot he mall. Yesterday we went to the Eid party at Kidville (nephew & my cousins were with us) & it was fun.

We're back to classes today :)
 
Well I've taken Riley to OT 3 times now and can say its slow but definite progress. The evaluation told me that he has sensory integration specially with noises and textures. His therapist is wonderful! She works with him on all sorts of things. Some of which he doesn't like- he Hates putting his hands in shaving cream or finger paints. But he s tolerating it better than before. He will go twice a week for 6 months. I can say I feel more relaxed about it now since I know we have a plan and he's responding to it well
 
Happy thought - hearing that makes me want to find ot for Megan. Her sensitivity to noise is concerning to us and we are worried how she is going to handle some things in school. But I do think she is slowly improving with it so then I think maybe she will eventually grow out of some of it. But this has been the one thing with her she has had since infancy. Other things come and go.

Polaris - I hate when others can't see what they are doing to our kids. How insensitive! Everyone likes to wind Megan up but she gets to a certain point and then it's out of control and melting down. And they can't understand why it was from something they did to her.

Cutie - congrats on the new job! How exciting - yes will be a change but sounds like a good one. And 2 years old already! Wow! We were looking at a pic on dh's phone the other night and Jordan was 6 monthsish and we realized it was last summer. This is already her 2nd summer and yet I keep forgetting she isn't a baby anymore, I can't imagine when she turns 2. I was used to having a child and a baby so feeling like I have 2 kids instead seems odd. Does that make any sense?

Polaris - why do you think claras sleep is so bad? Are you cosleeping? I know you tried sleep training but doesn't sound like it worked.

Omarsmum - can't believe how big Omar is getting! Glad he is doing better once schedule is back to normal. Megan is the same.

Jc - sorry about the kidney infection! No fun! Hope the pregnancy is going well. When does school start back up? It's interesting that daisy is so used to that routine and shift for summer is hard. I've heard the same from others. Hoping school will become that routine for Megan!

Tacey - Megan wanted to go camping in our backyard. So we set up the tent, we had a campfire and smores and then she decided she wanted to sleep in her bed instead :)
 
Fluff - Megan can find anything to be wrong or not how she wants it if she is tired and overstimulated. She could decide she only wants the sky to be green and until that happens she is going to melt down about it. And it's all about just her melting down. And honestly I don't believe it's a discipline issue or even a dr issue. I think its just her learning how to cope and sometimes it's harder for her to cope. I've personally found once she is in that zone that nothing but calming down time will help her so we have to leave or go from outside to in and go into her room and she gets calmed down. Eating also helps if hunger is part of the cause. She is very sensitive to sugar ups and downs so lack of eating or eating sugar tends to be big issue for her. I've stopped doing timeouts with her as I'm finding them not very helpful. It just raises her intensity more and she really then doesn't want to listen to me. I'm doing time in in her room and I'm going to put together a basket full of sensory toys that she can fidget with and hold while trying to calm down.

I'm finding that I understand Megan and how she ticks so much better. A year ago I was struggling to understand her and kept thinking something was wrong with her but I don't feel that way anymore. I think she is super smart and notices everything and very feisty and likes to be busy learning and playing as she has lots of energy and yet she needs more down time than most. I now feel like the more understanding I am the better response I get from her about everything, so I don't think of it as her being manipulative. She is telling me what she wants and when she asks for an extra book before bed I know now its because she isn't wound down enough and needs more wind down time. I know if we are busy all morning that I can't go out shopping with her all afternoon.

I can tick every box but 2 for Megan. She doesn't prefer quiet play... And yet in a way her style is different than other kids. She talks all day long. But she is so sweet and so empathetic. She isn't agressive at all. I've been around other kids more lately with things and it's been very obvious how different they are. The way they talk to each other and interact. More agressive, different way of even talking. Megan also isn't considering as much if it's safe before climbing high. She has way more daredevil side lately. She still isn't quite the way the other kids all are though. She is now doing one twisty slide at the school which had scared her for a long time. But she still won't do the really tall one. She walked up the steps and then walked back down. So maybe she does still consider it.

Otherwise I can tick all the boxes.

Tacey - we still have been too busy. Megan still isn't at baseline - but she somehow seems to be coping better. This weekend I'm going to my parents and girls are staying home with dad. Dhs mom is coming to help him. Lol my dad is fatigued and getting worse. Things have really hit me this past month how sick he really is and I've been even more emotional - if that's possible. One weekend we were there a few weeks ago - dad was so tired he could barely have a conversation. It really hit me then.
 
And raising your spirited child book... Between that book and this group has helped me realize that Megan isnt odd or something wrong with her. Every single child is different and just because mine has some unique qualities.. Doesn't make her less normal than "your" average child who can go to the ball drop with 200 kids or handle chuck e cheese arcade pizza place, or watch the fireworks right where they were doing them, etc, etc. My child noticed the baby ant limping on the sidewalk yesterday, and cried because the frog dh caught in the grass for her wasn't with his family, and cried horribly over the marshmallow dh threw in the fire as it "burned up" even though she was ok eating one 2 minutes before that. My sensitive child has some amazing qualities. Her empathy and understanding of feelings is amazing. She truly cares about everyone. She takes everything in and has an opinion about everything we do. She cries the loudest but she also laughs the loudest. Her curiosity and vocabulary are incredible. So what that she has a hard time sleeping or hates toilets flushing in public so much that she screams at me and everyone stares. In the grand scheme of things it's not worth me getting upset about. I've truly accepted Megan for who she is and I'm finding things much easier now that im in that place. So if my friend would dare say anything about my parenting or her needing a dr, I would give that person a piece of my mind.
 
Bekkie - Megan is an amazing sibling. I'm sure there will be an adjustment for all - but he may surprise you! Welcome to the group!
 
My OH and his mother are having a disagreement at the moment and she sent some very hurtful text messages today, some of them were about Thomas and how we are parenting him, e.g. "Thomas thinks he has to learn how to play, what damage have you already done to him?" and various others in a similar vein. I feel so hurt and upset. This is not the first time that this has happened. She is very depressed at the moment and is alienating herself from everyone, so I am doing my best not to take it personally. But it breaks my heart that she is being so judgmental about my child and implying that he is the way he is because of how we are with him. Sometimes I worry so much about Thomas and about whether he will be OK. And other people's comments do bring up all my own worries, no matter how much I try to brush them off.

Daisybee, thanks for asking about Clara's sleep. I don't know why she doesn't sleep well. We tried CC and did it religiously for 10 days and her sleep did improve a lot while we were doing it although she still never slept through the night, but it didn't stick, she was back to waking up constantly within a couple of weeks. If I had known that she would still be sleeping so badly I never would have done CC. I was so sure that it would work if we stuck to it. We are cosleeping now which is the only way that I am able to function. I think part of it is that she is very badly affected by teething and illness and she has had a lot of illnesses over the past year, luckily all minor. I do worry about a possible food intolerance or medical reason why she can't sleep. On a bad night she doesn't even always get through a full sleep cycle and can wake every 20 minutes for some of the night.

Flaffpuffin :hugs: That is a really upsetting story, I would be very hurt and upset by your friend's comments too. It's so difficult not to take these things to heart but it sounds like you have a good handle on your daughter's personality and how to help her to cope, so as best you can I would try to let it wash over you.

Tacey - it sounds like Alice is really growing up and maturing, it's lovely to hear about her making friends in the park. We are not quite there yet but Thomas is definitely more interested in other children now, but he doesn't quite know how to interact with them which I find very tough to watch sometimes. Hope the camping trip goes well. Is Alice still going to bed very early generally? Any chance she would take a nap during the day if you are up very late in the evenings? Happy 4th birthday for next week too!

Daisybee - it's good to hear that you are feeling more confident in your approach with Megan and that it is working well. It must be so tough at the moment though with your dad's illness. :hugs:

Omarsmum- I love that photo, Omar looks so grown up! Good to hear that Omar is in better form now that Ramadan is over. It is really a tough time for you all every year isn't it, with being out of the routine and not being able to get out in the heat when you are fasting. Is Omar looking forward to preschool in September? Thomas is quite excited about it. I am sort of excited and sort of dreading it!!
 
Polaris :hugs:

We had (and still have) sleep issues. Omar used to sleep well when he was a baby, but when he started to have his teeth after his 1st birthday it went out of the window. He suffered from several infections from 13 months till 2.9 yrs due to ongoing teething, he used to have a cold every 4-6 weeks, it was exhausting.

We thought that weaning him off the dummy would help as he used to wake up for his dummy at night, so we did when he was almost 3. He started to sleep though for few weeks then he started to wake up again. Night terrors started after his 3rd birthday.

Then he had a rash in May & the itchiness used to wake him up several times at night. It didn't get better until mid July.

Now he wakes up whining each & every night last night he slept through but tonight he's very restless. He fell asleep in the car at 10. He was in bed at 10.30. From 12 am until now (almost 2 am) he woke up 4 times crying. I still co-sleep I don't get any sleep, two days back I fell on the floor from exhaustion & lack of sleep, my blood pressure is really low.

We took him to the dr, he gave us antihestamine to help him sleep but he reacted badly to it, it didn't help him to sleep & he ended up in a crappy mood in the mornings.

I feel your pain, I wish I have something positive, we're in the same boat. I still co-sleep as I don't have energy to go to his room every time he wakes up :(
 
Omarsmum, I totally feel your pain. Chronic sleep deprivation is just so tough. Sometimes I feel OK and that I have sort of got used to constantly broken sleep. Then other times her sleep is worse and I just am barely functioning. I also think it gets harder the older they get, I can't imagine how tired I will be feeling if Clara is still having sleep difficulties at Omar's age. :hugs: :hugs:
 
Hello ladies

I could do with some advise. I have a litte girl nearly three who is not good at interaction, she can't interact with anyone she doesn't know. With family she's fine, very chatty but take her out of er comfort and she just wants to sit on my lap and doesn't want to play. Same with nursery she just follows, she's so shy it breaks my heart to see it. If we are in a shop I have to remind her to say bye, she will smile ad o it but she is cuddling me so tight. At home she's just a different child, chatty, loves her nan to bits and loves helping me do jobs ect... It's very important that she's a big girl

She's very cuddly, good eye contact, loves playing with dolls. She likes us joining in her games. She gets excited for her one fiend coming over but her friend seems more mature and they're the same age.

She shows lots of emotion, facial expressions

Nursery have mentioned getting her assessed and I'm so so worried for her :(

Any advise ? Xx
 
Hi Sparkle, I think she's still very young, I wouldn't be too worried at this age personally, especially seeing that she is fine at home. She might well come out of her shell a bit more as she gets older. There's a couple of kids on here that this has happened for. She sounds like she has a bit of social anxiety but honestly I think that is quite normal in a two year old. Some kids just don't enjoy a group child care setting until they are a bit older. I know Thomas wouldn't have coped well last year when he was almost three. He was actually quite similar in that he wouldn't join in at all with other children, in fact he would actively avoid them at that age.

It sounds like you wouldn't see a huge problem other than the nursery raising concerns because her behaviour at home sounds perfect. If you get her assessed the person doing the assessment will ask about/observe her behaviour in a variety of settings, e.g. nursery, home, unfamiliar setting. At that age I think it's totally normal to still be clingy to family and not to be confident in an unfamiliar setting or when family are not there.
 
I am pulling my hair out with Daisy :(.

From near perfect behaviour and no meltdowns or tantrums in about 8 months her behaviour has been really difficult and extreme again this past month. It has to be to do with her routine being different with me being off work on summer holiday and her being off pre-school. She has gone back to square one it seems. Public tantrums on a HUGE scale almost every time we go out, tantrums at home triggered by nothing at all (she just had an almighty one over nothing which had me in tears and saying things that I wish I didn't say), not sleeping in her own in bed, not eating properly, being sensitive to things like using public toilets, having her hair washed, being jealous of Tommy to name a few. She's been biting and hitting me and punched me in the stomach yesterday and she was never agressive even at her very worst so this is unheard of behaviour.

I am struggling with feeling ill at the moment anyway and the doctor said I will be admitted to hospital for IV antibiotics if my kidney infection still hasn't cleared up in a week's time. I am also very, very anaemic and am struggling with lack of energy and wanting to burst into tears all the time which means I can't cope with Daisy in the way I would like to be able to. My husband is away for a few days so I'm on my own with them too. I keep losing my temper with her which I hate doing but I just find it so frustrating that she's being like this when I know she can be so lovely and well behaved.

I just needed to get that off my chest!
 
:hugs:

I think it's an age thing? Maybe there is a growth spurt around this time?

Omar was horrible last month, change of routine during Ramadan really affected his behaviour. He was aggressive, whiney & crying for nothing all day. His sleep was very restless he used to fight bedtime & he went through a pickiness phase with food.

Now we're back to our routine he's much better. He's sleeping at a reasonable time, his sleep is better, & he's cheerful in general. He has his moments but they're easy to control by talking or just ignoring it.

When is she going back to pre-school? I think once she's back to her routine things will get better.

Try to relax Hun :hugs: I really hope your infection clears soon. Big hugs, I can't imagine what you're going through, sounds so stressful with two toddlers & pregnancy. :hugs:
 
Thanks hun. I wonder if there is some sort of developmental spurt around this age. I'm glad Omar has settled again into his routine.

I think I expect too much of her really. I know she is sensitive and can't cope with being over whelmed or change of routine and she has had 5 weeks away from her usual routine and we have done loads of really nice fun stuff (been on Thomas the tank engine, away for a week's holiday, to the In the Night Garden live show, Peppa Pig World, my brother's wedding, to her grandparents house for a few nights to name but a few) and I guess it has probably got too much for her. Its just because her behaviour had seemed so 'normal' in every way for such a long time that this has come as a shock. I need to be more understanding but it is hard mid tantrum when I just don't have the energy to deal with it. She goes back to pre-school in a week and a half's time and I go back to work then too so things will get back to normal then. It is making me very scared about how she'll react when I go on maternity leave and we have the new baby though as her entire routine will change permanently.

Thank goodness Tommy is no bother!! I hope those are not famous last words :lol:!!!
 
JC :hugs: I was going to say the same thing as Omarsmum, I think it is an age thing too. We went through similar with Thomas a couple of months ago and he has come out the other side of it now. Also, as you say, she is bound to be affected by the lack of routine over the summer and all the excitement of the different activities. I wouldn't worry about when you go on maternity leave and the new baby comes, because even though it will change her routine, it will still be a routine, just different. I think the tough thing over the summer for our kids is the lack of routine rather than just the change in routine. Our routine changed a lot over the summer because all the classes we were going to finished, but we developed a different loose routine for the summer because Thomas is just so much better when he knows what is happening each day. (So am I!) Anyway, by the time the new baby comes, she should be out of this phase and she will probably take it all in her stride. Thomas was absolutely brilliant for the first six months after Clara was born and then we had a couple of rough months and now things are good again.
 
A small update:

Omar will start pre-school on Sept 10th. We received the welcome letter yesterday. We have an orientation on Sept 8th for parents only. School for kg1 starts on 9th. 1/2 of the kids will come on the 9th, & the other 1/2 on the 10th. Parents should stay with the kids until they settle. From 9th till 12th kids will stay until 11 am only. The next week it will be until 1.40 pm but we can pick him up from 1 pm.

The letter clearly says kids should be able to use the toilet & feed themselves. Omar can use the toilet but our toilets are high at home so he can't climb up alone, I will see how it goes at school, I think their toilets are lower than the ones we have.

He's showing some progress in self feeding, today he ate his fruit pot & rice on his own with little mess but it's a progress, we have two weeks to hopefully master the spoon feeding. But when he's not in the mood he says he's not hungry & he refuses to eat. He's just being difficult.

I have an awful migraine, I have severe eye allergy & vit D deficiency, I don't have balance.

Omar is back to throwing tantrums, he has a cold & he's resisting self care. He will get dressed on his own when he's in a good mood, but when he's cranky he throws a tantrum & refuses to get dressed, I'm not giving in & dressing him. I wait until he's done screaming & jumping up & down, then I ask him nicely to sit on the floor to get dressed. I help him but I want him to know that throwing a tantrum will not force me to dress him.

I spent the past two days in bed, I feel exhausted, I have a follow up apt tomorrow, I just got my blood tests results.

We've been talking a out school a lot he seems excited but he doesn't want me to leave him alone, I'm not worried regarding it, he did well at kidville for months alone, I really hope he likes it there & settle quickly.

Wish us good luck xx
 
& I'm off the pill, we're NTNP but without DTD :rofl:

I'm on loads of meds, I don't want to risk getting pregnant while taking all those meds.
 
Haven't posted here for a while but so glad to see I'm not the only one with a 3.8 yr old from hell. Please let this be a short developmental phase because Tom has driven us both to loosing our tempers and smacking him over the last 5 days.

He is just horrible to be with most days tbh. He wakes up in a strop, demands attention constantly, whines and moans about everything and is having 3 mega meltdowns a day again.

On Friday he threw a metal train at a door at my friend's rented house when I sat him out of the room because he was throwing a fit about sharing a toy he had chosen to bring for his friend to play with. I shut him in the hall because he was running in and out of the room screaming so he threw the toy. I was horrified and totally lost it and smacked his leg. Really didn't help at all and the tantrum lasted another 45 mins. I should have just brought him home but my friend is always keen for us to stay as her son is hard work on his own too.

Today we took him to a historic house with a play park, horses and lots of child friendly things to do. He wined the entire 55 min drive to the point we both shouted at him to shut up. He whinged walking from the car and this eventually turned into the meltdown from hell that went on for nearly 2 hrs. Again we could have left but I'd paid to go in, we wanted to see the things there and tbh I've had enough of not doing things because of his tantrums. He's also no better if we stay at home - after a max of 3-4 hours he's moaning and whinging to 'see someone else'!

I think the biggest trigger for Tom at the mo is being hungry - he's having a massive growth spurt and is hungry every 2 hrs. And it's amazing the difference 5 mins after eating - he goes from screaming fit to smiling and behaving like a normal child again. So I do feel really bad getting so annoyed with him but he will not have that he needs to eat or do a wee, which is another big tantrum trigger.

I love my son to pieces but for once I would just like a day with a happy smiley child instead of one who answers everything with 'I don't want to do ....' in a whingy voice followed by screaming.

Sorry for the rant, it was a very bad day.
 

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