smoking?

[kimbotrav]

i quit as soon as i found out i was pregnant with my son 5 years ago started again shortly after his birth then i quit for my own health 2 years ago and have never looked back best thing i ever did 2 it is hard tough i can understand but personally i cant smoke or touch a drop of drink whilst pregnant it just feels wrong to me but each to their own....the midwives are really good at helping u stop very gradually my best friend was finding it real tough and founf her mw great support good luck xxxx

 

[v31984]

i still smoke with this pregnancy and i smoked with my son who was born 10 months ago and he was born 7lb 8.5oz and is very happy and very healthy... i know smoking is bad in pregnancy but i find it very hard.
And as for the placentas quoted by the above poster mine was huge and red and bulgy lol.
it is hard to stop and i have tried so many times, nothing seems to work!!!

but i understand where you are coming from!!!

I;m not saying it to be shocking or untrue. The fact is your son's placenta will have been compromised by the smoking - it absolutely would have been bigger in diameter and in thickness had you not smoked and it WILL have been gritty and calcified - areas of dead placenta that can't carry oxygen and nutrients basically. He probably would have been a bigger baby too, because inadequate placentas don't help grow the baby to it's full potential. I've seen a LOT of the things and whilst it might have looked healthy to the untrained eye, it most certainly won't have been.

I'm not meaning to upset you, it's important people know the real situation so they can make that informed decision isn't it?

And as ex smokers we all understand how hard it is too.

I am a midwife at my local delivery suite... newly trained yeah but i have some idea of what to look for even though i felt more sick looking at mine then i do with eveyone elses lol.

i have my next mw appt on the 25th feb and have a appt with the stop smoking mw too

So you should know that smoking has a negative impact on a placenta. And also know that telling people your son's placenta was fine is dishonest, to justify your own guilt.

As a MW it's your professional duty not to endorse or even suggest what is bad for your women is not anything other than damaging, esp you are giving out smoking cessation advice daily (i hope). You have an ethical responsibility to offer clear advice and not doing so is going against the NMC guidelines so you need to be very careful what you say. You've worked hard for your profession, you owe it to other women and to yourself to promote health better than that. Don't risk your registration.

Of course i know how negative it is to smoke during pregnancy but all i can do is advise people not force them to stop smoking!
If ladies come to me and say they are still smoking and don't want to stop all i can do is advise them and not start saying loads of things to scare them as i think that is wrong. And i am not saying my sons placenta was fine i was just simply putting across what it looked like. whereas you put all smokers placentas are dull and gritty which mine did not look like, so it was not dishonest at all!
i have a heart problem and doctors suggest to me to cut down on smoking and not quit all together as it can be dangerous for me due to the stress. i only smoke 3-4 a day whereas before i smoked 20. I will not be risking my registration at all, i am just giving my opinion.

Are you REALLY a Midwife? I struggle to believe it I really do. A Midwife simply wouldn't speak like that and use that terminology.

i personally think your missing the point here.. now now play nice

 

[charli19891]

i still smoke with this pregnancy and i smoked with my son who was born 10 months ago and he was born 7lb 8.5oz and is very happy and very healthy... i know smoking is bad in pregnancy but i find it very hard.
And as for the placentas quoted by the above poster mine was huge and red and bulgy lol.
it is hard to stop and i have tried so many times, nothing seems to work!!!

but i understand where you are coming from!!!

I;m not saying it to be shocking or untrue. The fact is your son's placenta will have been compromised by the smoking - it absolutely would have been bigger in diameter and in thickness had you not smoked and it WILL have been gritty and calcified - areas of dead placenta that can't carry oxygen and nutrients basically. He probably would have been a bigger baby too, because inadequate placentas don't help grow the baby to it's full potential. I've seen a LOT of the things and whilst it might have looked healthy to the untrained eye, it most certainly won't have been.

I'm not meaning to upset you, it's important people know the real situation so they can make that informed decision isn't it?

And as ex smokers we all understand how hard it is too.

I am a midwife at my local delivery suite... newly trained yeah but i have some idea of what to look for even though i felt more sick looking at mine then i do with eveyone elses lol.

i have my next mw appt on the 25th feb and have a appt with the stop smoking mw too

So you should know that smoking has a negative impact on a placenta. And also know that telling people your son's placenta was fine is dishonest, to justify your own guilt.

As a MW it's your professional duty not to endorse or even suggest what is bad for your women is not anything other than damaging, esp you are giving out smoking cessation advice daily (i hope). You have an ethical responsibility to offer clear advice and not doing so is going against the NMC guidelines so you need to be very careful what you say. You've worked hard for your profession, you owe it to other women and to yourself to promote health better than that. Don't risk your registration.

Of course i know how negative it is to smoke during pregnancy but all i can do is advise people not force them to stop smoking!
If ladies come to me and say they are still smoking and don't want to stop all i can do is advise them and not start saying loads of things to scare them as i think that is wrong. And i am not saying my sons placenta was fine i was just simply putting across what it looked like. whereas you put all smokers placentas are dull and gritty which mine did not look like, so it was not dishonest at all!
i have a heart problem and doctors suggest to me to cut down on smoking and not quit all together as it can be dangerous for me due to the stress. i only smoke 3-4 a day whereas before i smoked 20. I will not be risking my registration at all, i am just giving my opinion.

Are you REALLY a Midwife? I struggle to believe it I really do. A Midwife simply wouldn't speak like that and use that terminology.

i personally think your missing the point here.. now now play nice

At least someone is being nice lol

 

[Braven05]

I quit the second I had that pregnancy test in hand...and that had been my plan all along. I knew I didn't want to smoke during pregnancy...I am overweight and there will be enough struggles for me and baby to put one more thing against him/her. I wanted to put health before anything else. That being said...I'm not judging you. Smoking is an ADDICTION. And it is HARD to quit. Anyone who says its easy has never been a smoker. I didn't have trouble quitting this time around because all the while I was TTC I was preparing myself for the day I got my BFP and I knew I'd have to quit...so mentally I was prepared. I still think about it sometimes...but only in terms of after baby is born...and I doubt even then I'll go back to it.

My only advice is - try to cut down. Even if you can't stop right now...cutting down will do loads for your baby. There are lots of tricks for cutting down...smoke half cigarettes...send your cigarettes with your OH and only keep a few for the day...things like that. It'll only work if you really want to quit. Good luck hun!

 

[rhi]

Firstly can I add its not a mw's job to stop the mother from smoking it is the mothers it is her choice at the end of the day yes we all know the effects of smoking while pregnant all the mw can do is make the mother aware of this they cant put you in a straight jacket for the rest of your pregnancy I know plently of people who smoked while pregnant and with my son I was actually advised not to quit till the 2nd trimester due to stress.

I know of someone who actually took hard drugs while pregnant she knew what she was doing but like smoking it is a habit and depending on how long you have been doing it and how many you smoked depends on how addicted you are I personally had no worries quiting but others may be different.

 

[wilkie23]

My friend has smoked through all of her pregnancies and all of her children have been premature ..the most recent one 10 weeks early and suffering with a bleed on the brain which apparently can be common in prem babies, she won't know the damage until the baby is about 6 months +...maybe have a think about how difficult that would be to cope with, surely its easier to give up smoking ...as an ex smoker I know its hard but I also know you can do it

 

[loveylove]

i will admit i could still murder a fag now and then...

Um... could someone explain to me what this means in the UK? I'm hoping it has a much different meaning than in the US... lol (or not? hmmm)

Haha it means dying for a cigarette. Not kill a homosexual lol.

 

[amyw044]

Ive quit everytime as soon as ive seen the but then have gone to start 2 weeks after the births. Im hoping this time i will not start again. I could not smoke whilst pregnant just incase anything ever happened to my unborn child i would never stop thinking what if??? x

 

[abc123x]

Firstly can I add its not a mw's job to stop the mother from smoking it is the mothers it is her choice at the end of the day yes we all know the effects of smoking while pregnant all the mw can do is make the mother aware of this they cant put you in a straight jacket for the rest of your pregnancy I know plently of people who smoked while pregnant and with my son I was actually advised not to quit till the 2nd trimester due to stress.

I know of someone who actually took hard drugs while pregnant she knew what she was doing but like smoking it is a habit and depending on how long you have been doing it and how many you smoked depends on how addicted you are I personally had no worries quiting but others may be different.

Nobody said that it's the mw's job to force a woman to quit smoking. It is, however, the mw's job to make a woman aware of the risks that she is taking. As the woman claiming to be a midwife said, she cannot scare them out of it. If the thought of having a stillborn or SIDS baby does not scare you, then you should most definitely not be pregnant. And these women need to be aware of this.

Not talking about you personally, but in general.

I realize it can be hard, but I had a premature brother after my mom smoked through her pregnancy, he was a very lucky baby. I also had a stillborn brother because my mom said that it was okay. She had smoked when pregnant with my older brother and he was overdue and healthy.

Risks are risks.

All I can tell the OP is to do her research and speak with her doctor when she gets in. Then, think about the pros and cons, because the cons clearly outweigh the idea that stress is bad.

People keep saying that they were told not to quit until the 2nd trimester. I don't believe it. If it's true, I would stay as far away from that doctor as possible. The stress of quitting is not great enough to cause a MC and the baby is at its most crucial time of development in the 1st trimester. Any doctor who would say "definitely keep smoking during your 1st trimester, don't want you to get stressed out!" is clearly off their rocker.

 

[allaboard]

It's great to hear so many people have successfully stopped smoking (including myself).

People who smoke are not bad parents and bad people, they just need and have the right to some honest and straight talking facts and advice, that's what a good midwife will do without judging - help them make an informed choice, support them to work towards quitting if the woman wants to, and definitely not force anyone or belittle them. Walk a mile in someone else's shoes and all that. No one needs it sugar coated however.

I hope it's encouraging to the OP and others out there that you can do it.

 

[charli19891]

Midwives never judge!!!

 

[NatashaZ]

People are very passionate about their opinions when it comes to this, and I hope that no one here feels like less of a good person because they lack the resolve to quit. It is one thing to not have the willpower or strength (like I lack) to do the right thing. It is another thing completely to be malicious in your decision to keep smoking throughout your pregnancy. It is a matter of perspective, choice, and risk assessment, and I truly do believe that moms who smoke are not any less dedicated to their families. 20 years ago, no one knew the risk. Our generation is caught inbetween mothers who smoked with us in their bellies, and new scientific proof that it probably wasn't the smartest thing to do. It is hard to seperate what we know from experience (the "my mom smoked and I am healthy" or the "My sister/friend/etc smoked and everything was fine" arguments) and what we are being told in reports and new research. In the end, the best choice is to do what you believe is healthiest for the baby after consulting with your doctor or midwife, reading the research, and coming to your own conclusions about the risks involved with every choice you make. It is easy to be judged by people who feel this is a less than perfect route, but you will never be able to commit to a lifestyle change such as quitting smoking unless YOU believe you are doing the right thing. So take your time, that is what I am doing.

 

[Lesli45]

Sorry to hear you are having trouble quitting I'm a non-smoker, never have in my life, so I can't relate to the angst and difficulty you are having to deal with. But I do know a number of friends who have had trouble quitting (again and again) and so I empathize with your situation. Anyways, the facts have already been stated prior about the health implications that this could have on your baby. Anyone who denies that or the risks involved would truly be ignorant (or in denial). I hope that you find the strength within that you need to quit or at the very least cut back considerably. Have you considered consulting someone regarding how to handle stress or perhaps pick up meditation or yoga to at least take your mind off the addiction? Don't mean to sound flakey, but the mind is truly a powerful thing. You can get beat this, you just need to find what works for you. Good luck with the battle!

 

[charli19891]

I agree with the above, as long as you're willing to accept that others have their point of view and beliefs, and that all we can do us put our own across.


In midwifery I believe you have to have an open mind and an open heart, with real compassion and understanding for the way people think and the way they view the world. If you're always trying to get people to think the way you do, you're trying to remove the joy of diversity.

I'm not saying it's easy; it's incredibly frustrating when you hear or see people expressing points of view or beliefs that contradict your own belief system so completely.


When i'm struggling, especially at work, I try and remember that we're here to facilitate decisions, not preach opinions or judgements.

I think we do have a duty to educate women about things like smoking during pregnancy, health promotion is a big part of the midwifes role but I think we have to be very careful how we go about it since if we do it in a telling off kind of a way it will automatically get the womans back up and not be very successful.
you do have a duty to inform about the health risks of practices such as smoking and formula feeding, but you have to be incredibly careful about the way in which you go about this. Women are incredibly sensitive during the childbearing period and have the ability to remember what you say and your attitude towards them for the rest of their lives. I would even go as far as to say that if the experience is negative enough it could effect the way they feel about their bodies, their births and their babies.

I always start with something like, 'I'm not going to lecture you about such and such, but I do have a duty, as your midwife, to inform you about the following so if you ever did decide to change your mind you have the information to hand....' and then go in. That way they know you're just fulfilling your duty. Whether they choose to listen or not is their choice, but you musn't judge, or allow your dissapproval to show through your tone, or make them feel in some way inadequate.

Primarily, midwives are supporters for women, and I don't think that should spill over in to 'having a go'.

 

[superbecks]

i still smoke with this pregnancy and i smoked with my son who was born 10 months ago and he was born 7lb 8.5oz and is very happy and very healthy... i know smoking is bad in pregnancy but i find it very hard.
And as for the placentas quoted by the above poster mine was huge and red and bulgy lol.
it is hard to stop and i have tried so many times, nothing seems to work!!!

but i understand where you are coming from!!!

I;m not saying it to be shocking or untrue. The fact is your son's placenta will have been compromised by the smoking - it absolutely would have been bigger in diameter and in thickness had you not smoked and it WILL have been gritty and calcified - areas of dead placenta that can't carry oxygen and nutrients basically. He probably would have been a bigger baby too, because inadequate placentas don't help grow the baby to it's full potential. I've seen a LOT of the things and whilst it might have looked healthy to the untrained eye, it most certainly won't have been.

I'm not meaning to upset you, it's important people know the real situation so they can make that informed decision isn't it?

And as ex smokers we all understand how hard it is too.

I am a midwife at my local delivery suite... newly trained yeah but i have some idea of what to look for even though i felt more sick looking at mine then i do with eveyone elses lol.

i have my next mw appt on the 25th feb and have a appt with the stop smoking mw too

So you should know that smoking has a negative impact on a placenta. And also know that telling people your son's placenta was fine is dishonest, to justify your own guilt.

As a MW it's your professional duty not to endorse or even suggest what is bad for your women is not anything other than damaging, esp you are giving out smoking cessation advice daily (i hope). You have an ethical responsibility to offer clear advice and not doing so is going against the NMC guidelines so you need to be very careful what you say. You've worked hard for your profession, you owe it to other women and to yourself to promote health better than that. Don't risk your registration.

Of course i know how negative it is to smoke during pregnancy but all i can do is advise people not force them to stop smoking!
If ladies come to me and say they are still smoking and don't want to stop all i can do is advise them and not start saying loads of things to scare them as i think that is wrong. And i am not saying my sons placenta was fine i was just simply putting across what it looked like. whereas you put all smokers placentas are dull and gritty which mine did not look like, so it was not dishonest at all!
i have a heart problem and doctors suggest to me to cut down on smoking and not quit all together as it can be dangerous for me due to the stress. i only smoke 3-4 a day whereas before i smoked 20. I will not be risking my registration at all, i am just giving my opinion.

Are you REALLY a Midwife? I struggle to believe it I really do. A Midwife simply wouldn't speak like that and use that terminology.

i personally think your missing the point here.. now now play nice

At least someone is being nice lol

Midwives are real people too!!!

 

[LoraLoo]

I agree with the above, as long as you're willing to accept that others have their point of view and beliefs, and that all we can do us put our own across.


In midwifery I believe you have to have an open mind and an open heart, with real compassion and understanding for the way people think and the way they view the world. If you're always trying to get people to think the way you do, you're trying to remove the joy of diversity.

I'm not saying it's easy; it's incredibly frustrating when you hear or see people expressing points of view or beliefs that contradict your own belief system so completely.


When i'm struggling, especially at work, I try and remember that we're here to facilitate decisions, not preach opinions or judgements.

I think we do have a duty to educate women about things like smoking during pregnancy, health promotion is a big part of the midwifes role but I think we have to be very careful how we go about it since if we do it in a telling off kind of a way it will automatically get the womans back up and not be very successful.
you do have a duty to inform about the health risks of practices such as smoking and formula feeding, but you have to be incredibly careful about the way in which you go about this. Women are incredibly sensitive during the childbearing period and have the ability to remember what you say and your attitude towards them for the rest of their lives. I would even go as far as to say that if the experience is negative enough it could effect the way they feel about their bodies, their births and their babies.

I always start with something like, 'I'm not going to lecture you about such and such, but I do have a duty, as your midwife, to inform you about the following so if you ever did decide to change your mind you have the information to hand....' and then go in. That way they know you're just fulfilling your duty. Whether they choose to listen or not is their choice, but you musn't judge, or allow your dissapproval to show through your tone, or make them feel in some way inadequate.

Primarily, midwives are supporters for women, and I don't think that should spill over in to 'having a go'.

Why are you quoting something from google????

https://www.studentmidwife.net/stud...n-19/32074-strong-opinions-and-midwifery.html

 

[abc123x]

Saw that one coming.

 

[superbecks]

Oh Dear. I am a student midwife in my second year and I thought you were a bit harsh at first because midwives are real people, and some do smoke. And they might struggle to give up smoking when pregnant just like other women do. But I can't believe she has just taken all that off studentmidwife.net!!! Ps how did u find that she had???

 

[charli19891]

i googled it as this is what other midwives think and the majority of midwives believe smoking is really bad in pregnancy and now i am going to post what other midwives think as in smoking isn't that bad!!
everybody has different opinions and researching it if you all did instead of picking on someone you will see the different views on smoking

 

[LoraLoo]

Because her language completely changed. I had a quick look through her posts and she doesnt seem to even know most of the basic stuff about midwifery (i know more and im not a midwife!) just googled one sentance n that site came up. hy would a m/w need to google what a m/w should think/know? Oh well.