WishnandHopn
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14 dpo and BFN. Feeling a bit crampy...ugh
MK how are you? Any sign of the witch?
MK how are you? Any sign of the witch?
Sneaking back in...
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Ugh, why can't any of us get a positive??! I want it for you ladies as bad as I want it for myself!
No witch yet here. Woke up nauseous with a headache, and didn't sleep well last night. This is not unusual just before or during AF so I'm sure today or tomorrow will be CD1. Clinic called and they are going to increase me dose this cycle, so will just have to go in for a scan between CD 1 & 3 to confirm no cysts and then we begin again!
No witch yet here. Woke up nauseous with a headache, and didn't sleep well last night. This is not unusual just before or during AF so I'm sure today or tomorrow will be CD1. Clinic called and they are going to increase me dose this cycle, so will just have to go in for a scan between CD 1 & 3 to confirm no cysts and then we begin again!
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ducks, you wrote me a nice note a few pages back which I appreciated but didn't actually respond to! I kind of went on a bit of a hiatus with all off the pregnancy announcements going on in my life. Nice to hear from you again, and I hope you're doing well.
MK I completely agree, I've been on a number of threads now with no BFPs.... maybe I'm bad luck :/ I would absolutely love it if we could all get our bfps this year and stay in touch.
I ended up buying the book "making babies" after reading it was written by an RE and a TCM specialist. It gives good diet recommendations and strategies depending on which TCM diagnosis "type" you fall into. Theres even a quick and easy questionnaire you can do to find out your type.
I read parts off the book to DH about lifestyle and how just 4 poor lifestyle factors **combined** between the couple can make it 6-7 times longer for them to get pregnant and they were 6 times more likely to still be trying after 1 year. We definitely fit into this category. Notably, even 2 poor lifestyle factors made it 4 times more difficult to get pregnant, and honestly, DH had 3 on his own up until a month ago LOL. So DH agreed to aim for 1 cup of coffee a day (like me!) and cut back on drinking alcohol as well as quitting weed (we're coming up to 4 weeks on that one!). Its a good time for all of this stuff since it is New Years. We are also doing fairly well on our new healthy eating diet. I'm mostly just trying to get more fruits and vegetables in.
I read some people who said they stuck to this diet for 3 months and ended up pregnant... after trying for 1.5 years! Its worth a try I think
MK I completely agree, I've been on a number of threads now with no BFPs.... maybe I'm bad luck :/ I would absolutely love it if we could all get our bfps this year and stay in touch.
I ended up buying the book "making babies" after reading it was written by an RE and a TCM specialist. It gives good diet recommendations and strategies depending on which TCM diagnosis "type" you fall into. Theres even a quick and easy questionnaire you can do to find out your type.
I read parts off the book to DH about lifestyle and how just 4 poor lifestyle factors **combined** between the couple can make it 6-7 times longer for them to get pregnant and they were 6 times more likely to still be trying after 1 year. We definitely fit into this category. Notably, even 2 poor lifestyle factors made it 4 times more difficult to get pregnant, and honestly, DH had 3 on his own up until a month ago LOL. So DH agreed to aim for 1 cup of coffee a day (like me!) and cut back on drinking alcohol as well as quitting weed (we're coming up to 4 weeks on that one!). Its a good time for all of this stuff since it is New Years. We are also doing fairly well on our new healthy eating diet. I'm mostly just trying to get more fruits and vegetables in.
I read some people who said they stuck to this diet for 3 months and ended up pregnant... after trying for 1.5 years! Its worth a try I think
WishnandHopn
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MK I'm sorry you're feeling crappy but here's hoping it's MS and not AF! And if it is the evil witch...well it's good that you have a solid plan for the next cycle. Are you back in school this week or next?
Belle, that book sounds really interesting. I almost wanted to write 'hey, can I borrow it when you're done?' You know you've been on a thread with someone for a while when you forget that it's not actually possible to borrow their stuff! Glad your DH is back on board with the healthy lifestyle stuff! Sometimes DH (yours, mine, probably everyone's) need to see things in black and white or hear it from someone else. It's like they are wife deaf. Yes, I do believe that is a thing.
No AF for me yet. I think my luteal phase might be longer since my polyp surgery. It was 16 days last month. I suppose it's a good thing, probably means my ovulation was strong and progesterone is nice and high. But having to wait more than two weeks is just cruel!
I am sincerely hoping for BFP's for all of us this year! I think we've done enough time in TTC prison.
Belle, that book sounds really interesting. I almost wanted to write 'hey, can I borrow it when you're done?' You know you've been on a thread with someone for a while when you forget that it's not actually possible to borrow their stuff! Glad your DH is back on board with the healthy lifestyle stuff! Sometimes DH (yours, mine, probably everyone's) need to see things in black and white or hear it from someone else. It's like they are wife deaf. Yes, I do believe that is a thing.
No AF for me yet. I think my luteal phase might be longer since my polyp surgery. It was 16 days last month. I suppose it's a good thing, probably means my ovulation was strong and progesterone is nice and high. But having to wait more than two weeks is just cruel!
I am sincerely hoping for BFP's for all of us this year! I think we've done enough time in TTC prison.
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Wishn you said it right, it does feel like prison/hell! I think we will all make it out, one way or another.
I would totally lend you that book if I could! Lol, I just bought it for Kindle so wasn't too expensive, and I got it immediately.
I think that's a great sign if your LP is getting longer! I'm stoked that my FP seems to be lengthening, CD 11 and no positive OPK! I'm guessing it will be positive tomorrow which would mean a CD 13-14 O! I'm so happy that I seem to be done with CD 12 O dates!
Oooh one other thing I'm trying this cycle is hot foot soaks and heat bags on my abdomen. Not only is it cosy and relaxing, but it's supposed to improve circulation to where it needs to go! I'm hoping it'll help with lining.
I would totally lend you that book if I could! Lol, I just bought it for Kindle so wasn't too expensive, and I got it immediately.
I think that's a great sign if your LP is getting longer! I'm stoked that my FP seems to be lengthening, CD 11 and no positive OPK! I'm guessing it will be positive tomorrow which would mean a CD 13-14 O! I'm so happy that I seem to be done with CD 12 O dates!
Oooh one other thing I'm trying this cycle is hot foot soaks and heat bags on my abdomen. Not only is it cosy and relaxing, but it's supposed to improve circulation to where it needs to go! I'm hoping it'll help with lining.
WishnandHopn
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Argh 15 dpo and another BFN. I hate this limbo!
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Hi ladies!
Wishn, I'm sorry you are hanging out in extended TWW! Hoe frustrating. Mine has done that but I knew if was because of the progesterone supplement I'd be so frustrated without that! Hope it's a good thing!!
Belle that book sounds very interesting, I'm going to look into it! I can't get DH to commit to doing anything himself. He doesn't have any major concerns, drinks about once a week, smokes only a few times a year and no drugs of any sort. But also, no exercise and poor eating and sleeping habits.
I had a scan today (CD2, the witch showed up late morning yesterday). No cysts, so starting letrazole tomorrow, upping to 5mg per day. Maybe I'll get more than 1 follie this cycle! I go back CD 10 to check for trigger date, maybe even will do IUI next Sat. I know either personally or through someone several couples that were successful on #3! I see an acupuncturist tomorrow.
School starts Mon, so if this one could work, it would be so great to not worry about timing all these appts with my random school schedule!
Wishn, I'm sorry you are hanging out in extended TWW! Hoe frustrating. Mine has done that but I knew if was because of the progesterone supplement I'd be so frustrated without that! Hope it's a good thing!!
Belle that book sounds very interesting, I'm going to look into it! I can't get DH to commit to doing anything himself. He doesn't have any major concerns, drinks about once a week, smokes only a few times a year and no drugs of any sort. But also, no exercise and poor eating and sleeping habits.
I had a scan today (CD2, the witch showed up late morning yesterday). No cysts, so starting letrazole tomorrow, upping to 5mg per day. Maybe I'll get more than 1 follie this cycle! I go back CD 10 to check for trigger date, maybe even will do IUI next Sat. I know either personally or through someone several couples that were successful on #3! I see an acupuncturist tomorrow.
School starts Mon, so if this one could work, it would be so great to not worry about timing all these appts with my random school schedule!
WishnandHopn
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I'm soooo frustrated but also wondering if I O'd later. I had a strong positive OPK the morning of CD13, and I'm now on CD29. I had the sorest boobs I've ever had from around 5-8 dpo, so I'm thinking my progesterone was higher this cycle and therefore it's just taking longer to drop to a low enough level to start shedding uterine lining.
WishnandHopn
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MK really sorry the witch showed...Fx that the third IUI is the charm!
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MK so excited to hear they increased your dose! I have high hopes for you this next IUI! 3rd times a charm right? Excercise, diet and sleep were also listed as factors affecting fertility, so that could definitely be affecting things on your DHs side! My DH also wasn't getting enough sleep, so he has started going to bed earlier. Let us know how your acupuncture appointment goes!
Wishn it's entirely possible you O'd later and that your progesterone was higher this cycle. If that's the case that's a good sign either way! Might be your body is finally back on track!
Wishn it's entirely possible you O'd later and that your progesterone was higher this cycle. If that's the case that's a good sign either way! Might be your body is finally back on track!
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Wishn - I think my husband has deaf ears when it comes to me too.
You know, sometimes you sit down to have a serious conversation about one thing (finances) and it turns into something else completely.
My husband and I had one of those rare talks where he opens up about his true feelings and it has made me super sad. He is struggling with me taking the medicine and the thought of IUI because of faith and the thought of manipulating His will. He's really unsure if he wants to go through with the next stage, as if maybe it just isn't supposed to be at all. He asked me if being the best aunt is enough and I told him no. We discussed how different it is being around other peoples children versus having our own.
Our home is about 1800sqft plus a finished basement and we ended up having this talk about how it's too big for just the two of us if it doesn't end up happening. It was a very enlightening conversation as to where he is in his headspace. So much to consider now that I know.
You know, sometimes you sit down to have a serious conversation about one thing (finances) and it turns into something else completely.
My husband and I had one of those rare talks where he opens up about his true feelings and it has made me super sad. He is struggling with me taking the medicine and the thought of IUI because of faith and the thought of manipulating His will. He's really unsure if he wants to go through with the next stage, as if maybe it just isn't supposed to be at all. He asked me if being the best aunt is enough and I told him no. We discussed how different it is being around other peoples children versus having our own.
Our home is about 1800sqft plus a finished basement and we ended up having this talk about how it's too big for just the two of us if it doesn't end up happening. It was a very enlightening conversation as to where he is in his headspace. So much to consider now that I know.
WishnandHopn
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Pleasance, sending you hugs. Those are tough conversations, but good that he was able to open up. My DH has concerns that IVF is like playing God. He's ok with most of the other stuff. I tried to explain that assisted reproduction is exactly that: assisted. We are just going to help the sperm and egg to get together, whether or not that ends up making a baby is entirely out of our hands, and is up to God (or fate or Mother Nature or the universe, or whatever you believe). I guess just take things one step at a time, make these decisions together and try not to get too ahead of yourselves. I know it feels like forever, but you haven't been TTC for a year yet, and your chances of conceiving without too much intervention are still good.
AFM AF showed up last night. Feeling pretty down and don't even want to go to work today. Just want to cuddle up with DH and the kitties and watch bad daytime TV. The fact that it's -20 (Celsius!) isn't helping me get out the door!
AFM AF showed up last night. Feeling pretty down and don't even want to go to work today. Just want to cuddle up with DH and the kitties and watch bad daytime TV. The fact that it's -20 (Celsius!) isn't helping me get out the door!
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Pleasance, so glad you got DH to open up. I think it is really hard to get to theirk true feelings. I've had some of his same concerns and feel sometimes that I'm messing with God's plan for me. My sister tried to tell me maybe this is God's path...I don't know about that, but I've come to terms with using some assistance in that if bearing my own children isn't His plan, it won't happen regardless of what we do so I will just continue on the journey and see what happens. Would you two consider adoption? Obviously you aren't there yet, but it's something I've spent a lot of time thinking about. We too have a large house (5 bedrooms) too big for just the two of us! (Though since we moved in a year ago I've found ways to use the space!)
Wishn sorrythe witch got you! Glad ypu are out of limbo but wish it had gone the other way! You must be straight north of me, we are in the same cold snap, about the same frigid temp, and with wind chill it's about -20 Fahrenheit. Glad I work from home (though do have my acupuncture appt today so have to go out at least then).
Belle, how are those OPKs? Have you O'd yet?
Wishn sorrythe witch got you! Glad ypu are out of limbo but wish it had gone the other way! You must be straight north of me, we are in the same cold snap, about the same frigid temp, and with wind chill it's about -20 Fahrenheit. Glad I work from home (though do have my acupuncture appt today so have to go out at least then).
Belle, how are those OPKs? Have you O'd yet?
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Pleasance such a tough conversation! Those are the important ones to have! I believe that God gives us the tools to help ourselves. We are lucky and privileged enough to live in a time where reproductive medicine is somewhat accessible to us. I also have misgivings about IVF, namely what do you do with any of the leftover embryos! If we have to go that route, I think we will ultimately end up donating our embryos to another couple after we have as many children as we want. I would prefer to give them a life (even if its not with me) than have them destroyed.
Well I think its pretty clear that I O'd on CD 13 based on the massive temp shift I got this morning lol. My OPK never seemed to go positive, but it might be that I was reading them wrong. This was my first time using the standard OPKS (always used the easy digital ones before). On CD 12 it looked like it might have been positive to me, but DH and I both agreed the test line was a bit lighter. Maybe we should have counted it as positive though? I dunno. Next month I'm going to use both digital and regular OPKs because my RE wants us to use the standard OPKs when we do IUI (I'm still hoping we won't have to go that route!).
Oh well! We BD'd EOD so hopefully that will be enough even though we didn't BD the day before O (which I'm fixated on being the best day to BD lol).
Well I think its pretty clear that I O'd on CD 13 based on the massive temp shift I got this morning lol. My OPK never seemed to go positive, but it might be that I was reading them wrong. This was my first time using the standard OPKS (always used the easy digital ones before). On CD 12 it looked like it might have been positive to me, but DH and I both agreed the test line was a bit lighter. Maybe we should have counted it as positive though? I dunno. Next month I'm going to use both digital and regular OPKs because my RE wants us to use the standard OPKs when we do IUI (I'm still hoping we won't have to go that route!).
Oh well! We BD'd EOD so hopefully that will be enough even though we didn't BD the day before O (which I'm fixated on being the best day to BD lol).
WishnandHopn
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Belle that temp shift is significant so it does look like you O'd despite the OPK not quite being positive. Sometimes that happens to me when I'm well hydrated, like if I drink a full glass of water before bed and test first thing in the morning. O-1 and O-2 are the most fertile days so you must have hit one of them! Fx for you this cycle!
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Was out with a friend tonight and of course TTC came up and I got the whole stay positive I know it'll happen for you two speech (after I said I may just be barren). I kept it together and said calmly I knew she meant well, but that just isn't helpful and I'm just being realistic that it may not happen. Now she is all woried about what she said and feels bad, but glad I said it. Hopefully that's the end of the "pep" talks from her! I love her dearly and she really means well. Ugh I'm so tired of advice!
Acupunture was good yesterday, going back next week. DH said he'd maybe try it too, so maybe we'll start that next cycle of this one doesn't work.
Acupunture was good yesterday, going back next week. DH said he'd maybe try it too, so maybe we'll start that next cycle of this one doesn't work.
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Thanks Wishn, I think it must have been something like that with that stupid OPK lol. Not going to worry about it though. If its going to happen it'll happen, and BDing one extra time wouldn't have made that much of a difference anyway.
MK nobody, and I mean nobody wants to believe that infertility is a real thing and that sometimes it can't be overcome. I'm sorry you got the "stay positive" speech from your friend, but I think it is so incredible how you handled the situation. So often I have heard insensitive remarks from people and I haven't been able to handle it aside from just grinning and bearing it. I think because "infertility" is new to me. So I want to say that I think you are amazing and you are strong! I hope this happens for you! I hope I hope I hope. I hope it happens for all of us. But I know if it doesn't that we will be okay. There are other things that life has to offer. I don't believe that there is only one path to derive meaning from this life.
MK nobody, and I mean nobody wants to believe that infertility is a real thing and that sometimes it can't be overcome. I'm sorry you got the "stay positive" speech from your friend, but I think it is so incredible how you handled the situation. So often I have heard insensitive remarks from people and I haven't been able to handle it aside from just grinning and bearing it. I think because "infertility" is new to me. So I want to say that I think you are amazing and you are strong! I hope this happens for you! I hope I hope I hope. I hope it happens for all of us. But I know if it doesn't that we will be okay. There are other things that life has to offer. I don't believe that there is only one path to derive meaning from this life.
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Wishn I found a link for the quiz from the book Making Babies which essentially gives you a TCM "diagnosis" along with lifestyle strategies to improve on the symptoms. The book obviously goes into much more detail, but this gives a good start
https://jillblakeway.com/wp-content/quiz/
https://jillblakeway.com/making-babies-fertility-types/
I'm tired and stuck and my husband is dry and stuck. Stuck types tend to be stressed out and angry... no wonder we clash and fight haha
https://jillblakeway.com/wp-content/quiz/
https://jillblakeway.com/making-babies-fertility-types/
I'm tired and stuck and my husband is dry and stuck. Stuck types tend to be stressed out and angry... no wonder we clash and fight haha
WishnandHopn
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Thanks Belle, I will try those out!
I consider myself to be an "optimistic realist" about life in general, and even our TTC journey. It's like I really want to remain hopeful and positive that it will happen, but I am also preparing myself for the possibility of a life without kids, which of course can be great and fulfilling (and has been up until the point we started TTC!) I think that people really do mean well but they just have no idea what to say when the topic of infertility comes up. The right thing is probably just to listen and offer no advice, but that's hard for most people (myself included). It's so annoying when they say "relax and it will happen" but I am almost more annoyed by people who say things like, oh "well you could always adopt", or "think of how much more money and freedom you'll have if you don't have kids?" It's the limbo that's the worst for me I think...the fact that it could go either way and I have no idea which way or how much time we will spend in this limbo wondering if we will be transitioning to a family of 3 or settling into a life as dinks (dual income, no kids). Makes it really hard to live life in the present and be happy now. But I'm really trying!
I consider myself to be an "optimistic realist" about life in general, and even our TTC journey. It's like I really want to remain hopeful and positive that it will happen, but I am also preparing myself for the possibility of a life without kids, which of course can be great and fulfilling (and has been up until the point we started TTC!) I think that people really do mean well but they just have no idea what to say when the topic of infertility comes up. The right thing is probably just to listen and offer no advice, but that's hard for most people (myself included). It's so annoying when they say "relax and it will happen" but I am almost more annoyed by people who say things like, oh "well you could always adopt", or "think of how much more money and freedom you'll have if you don't have kids?" It's the limbo that's the worst for me I think...the fact that it could go either way and I have no idea which way or how much time we will spend in this limbo wondering if we will be transitioning to a family of 3 or settling into a life as dinks (dual income, no kids). Makes it really hard to live life in the present and be happy now. But I'm really trying!
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