So what does everyone think about working Mums?

[Novemberbabe]

Well, I've got to go back to work full time tomorrow - LO is only 4 mths old but due to only getting rubbish statutory mat pay I can't afford to take any longer off and I can't be a SAHM as we won't be able to afford our mortgage.

Tbh if I had the choice I would want to work but only part time so I get to spend time with LO and would def wait until he was a little older before returning but unfortunately I have no other option.

I'm just curious what people's thoughts on working mums are. A few of my friends have made veiled comments about how they would never return to work and that women shouldn't have children if they're not going to be home to look after them etc.

I don't want any arguments on here, just interested in what your thoughts are, whatever they may be. I personally think that I shouldn't be persecuted for having to return to work, it doesn't mean I love my son any less and if we'd waited until we were in a financial position where I could stay at home I'd be in my forties and who knows if I'd be able to conceive then.

 

[Lellow]

Im one and they rock

 

[NuKe]

your friends are idiots (sorry lol), im not a working mum but my mum went back after 3 months i think (shes a school teacher) and i never missed out, i had a wonderful childhood! dont let anyone make u feel bad, you are going back for your child!!

 

[charli87]

i will be a sahm but only as my work only just covers childcare costs so its not worth the stress. I think your friends are a littlw narrow minded to ge honest, its not like your doing it to get away from your son, your doing it to improve his life!
Dont worry what they say your doing whats best for your family and thats all that matters

 

[BabyJayne]

I've gone back three days a week, and am doing some self-employed work to top this up, which I can do in the evenings and at weekends.

We all do what we have to do to give our LOs comfortable lives, and we balance and juggle things so we can do that. This may mean being a SAHM, working part-time and working full-time. In an ideal world I think we would all love to either be a SAHM or work minimal amounts - but that isn't always possible.

I think mums who work full-time deserve a medal - do these friends who made these comments have children? It's so easy to comment on what you would do with regard to work when you are not in that situation x

 

[Novemberbabe]

do these friends who made these comments have children? It's so easy to comment on what you would do with regard to work when you are not in that situation x

No, none of them have children yet - they were talking generally what they think would be best for their children when they have them x

 

[Lellow]

I think mums who work full-time deserve a medal - do these friends who made these comments have children? It's so easy to comment on what you would do with regard to work when you are not in that situation x

I agree with this.

To be honest, i dont HAVE to work as we would manage well with just DH's wage, however we wouldnt be able to save, have holidays, buy luxuries when we wanted to!

I also LIKE my job, i like my colleagues and i enjoy spending time there. Its good for my well being too to have something away from home....Even if i won the lottery tomorrow and was rolling in it, id still do SOMETHING.

Your friends are being insensitive and a little naive to be honest!

 

[gemabee]

i'd love love love to be a sahm!
but because i'm a single mum i'm goin back to work... this is because i want finn to grow up with a strong work ethic - not for financial reasons because, ridiculous as it is, i'd be better off not working.
i don't agree with households where no-one works... it breeds children who don't want to work!
sahm's rock... working mum's rock... scroungers do not!

 

[Janidog]

I work 3 afternoons a week, and i don't feel guilty. I have 2 friends who have to work full-time. I don't think i could work full time, but i certainly don't criticise those that have to or want to.

 

[lozzy21]

Im going back part time, we couldent afford for me not to and even if we could, i think i still would for my sanity.

I think its all about the balance. There have been some people where i have thought what was the point in having children, their kids are in daycare 10 hours a day and spend their weekends with grandparents or a nanny because they are too busy concentrating on their job. Yes its nice being able to get your child the best but i think being their for them is better

 

[babyblog]

I work part-time and i am glad that i do.It allows me space form my LO and i get to be something else other than a mum. Some of my friends are SAHM's and whilst it works for them-i would rather be earning my own money to enable us to treat my LO to days out and to go on holidays etc.Hope it works out well for you x

 

[Penfelyn]

I will be a working mum! I'm actually still studying at the moment but will be returning in September to complete the last 3 years of my degree and then working full time once I've qualified (as a Doctor). I want LO to have a Mum who is happy and fulfilled in her career and who she has seen work hard to achieve her goals.

 

[clara123]

Why can't women have it all- a family and a career? Why does it have to be one or the other? I have both I've worked hard to get where I am and I love my life! X

 

[kawaiigirl]

I am going back to work full time in may. I would like part time but have been refused that. I'm disappointed but I definately would not want to be a SAHM. Part time would be the perfect balance for me. There is absolutely nothing wrong with working mums and they should be applauded!! Xx

 

[taylor197878]

i think its great ur going bk to work, i dont work but i used to when i had my other 3 and i had to go bk i was bk at work at 6 weeks due to bills and all sorts.

now im out off work i cant work for health reasons.

but good on u and dont listen to ur pals.

 

[Chocciebutton]

If its any consolation......I am 39 and expecting my third, I am no more stable than I was your age! I am hoping to go self employed in the near future as I have to look after my husband at the moment who is recovering from cancer, but you have to do what you think is right. I dont have a mortgage but would return to work if I had one at least you know that the money is paying off your mortgage rather than lining a landlords pocket which is what my situation is.

 

[Natasha2605]

I'm proud that I can say that I work to provide for my child.
Views like your friends and others who believe that a working mother is a neglectful (Etc) mother really piss me off.
I only work 3 days but I still work. I do it for me. I do it for my family.
The adult conversation and doing something for myself is the reason I went back. We could afford for me not to work but that's not me.
My daughter spends the time when I'm working either with my OH(depending on his shifts) or my own mum so I don't pay childcare.
I have no problem with SAHM , as long as they're not relying on government benefits to do so xx

 

[hattiehippo]

I work 2 days a week which works out really well. I get 3 days with Tom to go to groups etc and he has 2 days at a nursery that he enjoys going to while I get some adult coversation and can go to loo on my own, drink hot coffee etc!
We could just afford to live on DH salary but it would be really tight.

I think mothers have to make the decision that works for them and their family. No-one questions men carrying on working full time once they have kids whereas we get all the guilt piled on us for doing the best for everyone.

 

[Chocciebutton]

^^^^^I can understand any mum wanting to be at home though its only natural

 

[andbabymakes3]

Blablabla, sick of people judging mums - for whatever choice we make. If we work, we're judged. If we dont, we're judged.

I am a WAHM, I stopped working 3 weeks before Holly was born and I was back to work part time when she was 3 weeks old (I'm self-employed and taking more time off wasn't an option). I built my hours up gradually, we had a part time nanny until Holly was 1 then she started part time nursery - now she goes 1 full day, 3 half days and 1 day with her daddy.

I am doing what is necesary for me and my bubs, I'm a single parent and want to give her the best life possible, so I work. Being a SAHM wasn't an option for me, unless I went on benefits (not knocking those who are on benefits btw).

And tbh, I don't think I would want to be a full time SAHM - Holly loves her nursery and is a very happy, settled, confident and secure little girl who knows she is adored by both her mummy and daddy.

Damned if you do, damned if you don't!