Softcups

[Helly]

Wow Eve, yeah BPD is a right nightmare, i still behave impulsively now, like I want to do big things very quick sometimes but fighting back from it on your own is such an achievement. Screw your psych, mine was an arse as well. Like you said, you can feel yourself going and you act on it. That proves you are well, if you werent you wouldnt react! So glad you pulled through, the pictures of you so thin are scary. Well done, you're a bloody strong woman.

 

[Aaisrie]

Awww thanks Helly

We are all strong, we all have our crosses to bear and we will all get there one way or another! I have and daily do, fight my demons and I'll keep on and Saraya will see what she can do anything if she puts her mind to it.

 

[Helly]

Exactly Eve, I worry James is genetically predisposed to mental problems now, but I know as long as I stay well he will have a good role model to follow in me and hopefully he will always be fine. Isnt it funny how we wanted to die for so long and now we want to fight every minute of every day to live. Strange how life turns around.

 

[Aaisrie]

Totally agree, well Saraya is definitely predisposed with my crap, Chris', my mum, my sister, his mum, his dad.... geez there's a whole lot of mental health stuff on both sides!!

 

[Aaisrie]

Oh Helly you're gonna get crosshairs on your chart tomorrow! Def looks like CD14 O!

 

[Helly]

Yeah I have it on both sides as well, so big genetic problems for James, ive just got to be strong and if it ever happens be strong for him.

Yeah Im thinking CD14 as well but with the iffy talking temp yesterday im not sure, so we BD last night to cover it incase it was yesterday!

 

[Nessicle]

Oh Helly you're gonna get crosshairs on your chart tomorrow! Def looks like CD14 O!

what are crosshairs Eve?

 

[Mommy2Kian]

Hiya! just got back from asda, and read all the posts i missed, it seems everyone is opening up to eachother and going down a personal route, thanks you for sharing your stories, i have upmost respect for u all, and im glad things are better for u guys now!!!

i tried overdosing when i was 16 but it didnt work, how wierd, i try to kill myself when im at my lowest, then i meat a gret man and my lifes wonderful, then i get diagnosed with a disease that nearly killed me, "cancer" after endless chemotherapy, baldness sickness, operations, transplants, transfusions, needles, i get the all clear...6 months later it returns,this time i have a 40% chance of survival, if i lose the battle i have 6 weeks to 6 months to live, i SHIT MYSELF!!! but im here 6 years on...also told i would be infertile and had some ovary removed and frozen for ivf when i was older...but i didnt need it...and all through those 2 years of endless shit, ross stood by me, he's seen me at my lowest, even shaved his hair off with me when i lost mine...we musta looked a right pair in our thinsulate hats in bed to keep us warm

i have a higher chance of getting a secondary cancer now like lung, breast leukeamia etc, im scared of dying and never seeing kian grow up...what a turn around, few years before i was trying to end my life...life is strange!

 

[BellaBlu]

I agree, it's amazing to read everyones stories.. All of you are so incredibly brave! They say everyone has their own battles, and that is so true. You'd never know how amazing some of the stories are until you sit back and realize that a lot of girls you know have been through some of these things.

Kudos to all of you ..

 

[Aaisrie]

Wow M2K that's awful. You are so strong to have gone through all that and then with baby K too... just unreal. I admire the strength in all you ladies - it seems we have a very close group here. I haven't found this kind of openess anywhere else on BnB! We got the goodies over here!!

In our craziness we are drawn to each other!!

Ness - the cross hairs are when you get the red O mark from FF on your chart. Mine appeared when I put this mornings temp on, which I knew it would.

 

[Helly]

Wow M2K, we fought battles in our minds that we had some, though limited degree of control over, you have no control over cancer in that way and you still fought right through it, its you that deserves the upmost respect and Ross, safe to say he's a keeper!

 

[BellaBlu]

I agree with Helly! M2K you could write a book about all the things you've been through and survived, and I wouldn't put it down till I was through reading it. You're truly inspirational.

Speaking of - I've given in. I'm making an appointment thursday! Going to go with a friend as DH will be at work..

Went to the bathroom this morning and had the most awful pain right about my pubic bone, *pouts*

I really wanted this to be gone. But I spoke to my mother today who told me that cervical cancer runs in the family (didn't know that!) so I'll be going to get checked out for sure. Been very tired the last few days too, went to bed early last night.. couldnt even keep my eyes open. I'm sick of not feeling well.. something ALWAYS seems to be wrong with me. So I suppose getting checked out will be the best thing.

 

[Nessicle]

Gosh it puts stuff in to perspective for me when I hear stories like Eve's and M2K's - I know we all fight different battles and I'm a firm believer in you can only experience what you've gone through (if that makes sense?) and that what doesnt kill you makes you stronger but then to read how amazing you guys have been it makes me feel so blessed and positive about life!

My inspirational ladies!!

Ah crosshairs I understand now Eve! thanks! I'd read it a few times on here but didnt understand what it meant. I'll be looking out for crosshairs on my chart

 

[Mommy2Kian]

thanks, he is deffo a keeper!!!
i look back at my life and sometimes wonder how im still standing, i been dealt a bad hand in life except for kian, he is the best thing thats ever happend to me, and my little kaden...

i love this saying

"you dont know how strong you are, untill you have to be"

It's true!

 

[Mommy2Kian]

bella i hope it is nothing serious!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Nessicle]

I agree with Helly! M2K you could write a book about all the things you've been through and survived, and I wouldn't put it down till I was through reading it. You're truly inspirational.

Speaking of - I've given in. I'm making an appointment thursday! Going to go with a friend as DH will be at work..

Went to the bathroom this morning and had the most awful pain right about my pubic bone, *pouts*

I really wanted this to be gone. But I spoke to my mother today who told me that cervical cancer runs in the family (didn't know that!) so I'll be going to get checked out for sure. Been very tired the last few days too, went to bed early last night.. couldnt even keep my eyes open. I'm sick of not feeling well.. something ALWAYS seems to be wrong with me. So I suppose getting checked out will be the best thing.

I think thats a good idea Bella to go to the docs, fx it's nothing serious

It's a rubbish feeling being ill constantly, it wears you down til you end up with no fight in you - that's how I ended up on antidepressants. Had 3 very bad chest infections, then ended up in the back of an ambulance put on oxygen as had pleurisy, then got sickness and diarrhea 4 times that year also on top of that with other illnesses, safe to say I was a real mess lol!

You can't go about your daily life being in pain so best to get it checked out xx

 

[Nessicle]

thanks, he is deffo a keeper!!!
i look back at my life and sometimes wonder how im still standing, i been dealt a bad hand in life except for kian, he is the best thing thats ever happend to me, and my little kaden...

i love this saying

"you dont know how strong you are, untill you have to be"

It's true!

well you are an amazing lady that's for sure xx

 

[Aaisrie]

Bella - FINALLY!! I was nearly ready to get on a plane and take you there myself!!

And this is another fight, all of us fighting to TTC and something we all have no control over but the fact that we are here, doing everything we can shows us for the women we are - DETERMINED!

 

[Nessicle]

totally deterimined!!

 

[Aaisrie]

I am so tired this afternoon.... I really need to do those dishes and tidy up and bit but I'm struggling to pull myself off the seat... I'm also severely dehydrating but to get a drink one must get up!