Spanking

[JASMAK]

Do you agree with spanking your child, and if so, at what age is it appropriate. I do not spank, by I know people who do, and whether by coincidence or not, they all have rather aggressive children.

 

[Blue_bumpkin]

i dont and will not ever spank. I may tap his hand but would never use force with my child.

That is something I can honestly say I would never do.

 

[surprisepreg]

I dont in general agree with spanking. I am a big fan of time outs...works very well with my 2 year old...lol

 

[Blue_bumpkin]

There are other more effective methods of disciplining a child. Like time outs ^

I don't agree with spanking either

 

[cleckner04]

Coming from an upbringing that my dad thought it was okay to punish by using a belt, I can most definitely say spanking will not be happening in my household. I think there are much better ways to punish a child.

 

[leeanne]

I was spanked as a child and, unfortunately, that led to fear. And do you think I ever had an open and honest relationship with my mom while growing up? No.

I don't believe in spanking, although, honestly I have done twice to my son. And I felt very badly about it. It was because he was acting up, my stress level went up and so did his. It had to do with me, not him, reacting negatively to stress.

One thing I always think about. If your child hits someone and you hit them for punishment, what are you teaching your child?

 

[coccyx]

Think its awful. Hate to see it, quite upsetting seeing an adult hitting a child

 

[trumpetbum]

I don't hit my children. I don't think it is necessary however I do think that positive discipline and consistancy are.
I have taken stick for not smacking in my time from extended family as it's very much the discipline method of choice where I live but I feel there are many more effective tools accessible to us these days to make use of. Much of the criticism I have had is based on the assumption that not smacking means not disciplining, but we don't 'do' wishy washy parenting.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I think there is a HUGE difference in discipline and abuse/fear.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I think the generation these days are worse then when the majority of people were smacked for bad behaviour!

 

[redpoppy]

I and my brothers were never spanked, my mum and her five siblings were never spanked, I intend to never spank my children.

I used to be against it in a militant scary way but after being exposed to more people I know who were spanked I now think it's best NOT to smack your children and I respect people who DO NOT spank their children and still instil discipline.

I don't think you have to smack to instil discipline at ALL and I think smacking has little to do with discipline either.

One thing I will say. I have a temper on me which has been controlled increasingly well by me over the last ten years or so. Because there was never any hitting in our household I have NEVER thought violence was EVER a way of expressing my anger. I have been violent in self defence but NEVER due to anger or any other reason. I'm not sure if this would be the case if I had been spanked? I can't say either way but I wonder....

 

[PeanutBean]

I would never ever spank. However I do think there is a place for a smack in appropriate circumstances. An emergency and dangerous situation with a laughing persistent child I think sometimes warrants a light smack. Not hard, not in a sensitive place (not the face!), not to bruise, possibly not even really to smart, but to surprise into inaction. Mostly for younger children where words and reasoning don't really work or at least not quickly enough. I am a biologist and we are mammals and all mammal parents use what resources they have to teach their babies.

 

[Kimmer]

I don't agree with hitting a child at all. Violence doesn't teach a child anything other than 'if someone's doing something you don't like, hit them till they stop'.

Either that or they don't learn not to do something, they just learn how to be too scared of doing something. I'd never hit my child, I would never want her to fear me.

To me, hitting a child is losing control.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I would never ever spank. However I do think there is a place for a smack in appropriate circumstances. An emergency and dangerous situation with a laughing persistent child I think sometimes warrants a light smack. Not hard, not in a sensitive place (not the face!), not to bruise, possibly not even really to smart, but to surprise into inaction. Mostly for younger children where words and reasoning don't really work or at least not quickly enough. I am a biologist and we are mammals and all mammal parents use what resources they have to teach their babies.

100% agree.

 

[smokey]

I dont agree with spanking but im not against a light smack to the hand if realy needed or as a last resort, I think there is alot of differance between the two.
I hope I never have to do it but only time will tell what happens in years to come.
I deffinatly dont agree with hitting of any kind around the head.
I had the odd smack off my parents as a child when it was needed and I most certainly dont have any ill feelings towards them over it, I have a very healthy loving relationship with them and respect them greatly for how they raised me.


Edit also I think age has alot to do with it after all no one would ever hit a baby for doing somthing naughty as they dont even know what naughty is and I wouldnt even give a tap to the hand before say about 7.

 

[Miss Wright]

I just don't think it works as a discipline technique personally. Aside from that, I'm not comfortable with hitting a child. All adults are protected by law against being hit/slapped but not children?? Makes no sense to me.

 

[Blah11]

Don't like it, wont do it. I find hitting someone quite barbaric and would rather discipline in other ways that will hurt more (not physically). I think spanking instills fear, not respect.

 

[midori1999]

I do not smack/spank/hit my children and do not need to. I am more than capable of 'outwitting' a child and have them display the desired behaviour without having to resort to violence.

I personally find that those parents who smack are quite often the ones with the most poorly behaved children. I also feel that smacking is more about the parents' lack of self control or ability to control the situation than the child's behaviour.

 

[polo_princess]

Im still learning Brookes personality and trying to figure out what "punishment" will work best to suit that, but if she were to put herself or others into immediate danger then i wouldnt hesitate to smack her.

As a child i wasnt even smacked, i was beaten, one time my stepfather dragged me through a hotel in Spain by my hair All i ever knew growing up was violence and to some extent i still do, which is why i would prefer not to have to smack if i can avoid it, but i wont rule it out because i never know how things will pan out or what unexpected situation i could land in.

 

[cleckner04]

I can say, being from a household that had no problems spanking, hitting with a belt, slapping the face, etc. I definitely have a reaction when I'm angry that is usually some form of physical violence. I didn't even realize it was different from how people should act. I always thought it was a normal way to express emotions. But obviously it's not and I work hard to keep from losing my temper especially around Emma. I have tapped Emma on her backside once when she was trying to get into the electronics and I wanted to make my point that no means no when she repeatedly kept going back. I felt like absolute shit afterwards and cried about it. I didn't do it from anger but did it so she wouldn't be hurt and I wanted her to know I really meant it when I said no. It wasn't even a hard pat but I would never do it again.

There are definitely better ways to get a point across.