Support Group failed IVF/ICSI IUI or any failed assisted conceptions 2014

Wallie · May 3, 2011

You're very good at writing stuff down Lainey, it could have been me too although my OH is not so upset as I am. He seems to be taking it more in his stride.

It's good to get it out though and for others to read and that we are all exactly in the same position, so thanks for that. It's just not only me who's emotionally drained just now.

:hugs:

Ttcne · May 9, 2011

May I join?
Newly failed here. This was my 1st IVF cycle. Got 8 eggs, 6 fertilized, 2 blasts on day 5, 2 more to freeze if they made it to blast. Two high quality blast implanted a very traumatic bloody transfer. I spotted and cramped from day 2 onwards in the tww. Was told it was fine but at 6dpdt I went and got a beta done myself that was <1. I knew I was out then but the clinic insisted I do two more days of meds then retest. Result was off course negative :cry:

Moving forward I am not sure what I want to do. I am very tempted to stop this hurt right here and just start applying for adoption. My dh wants to give it another shot. I refuse to until we have a sit down with the RE about the difficult transfer as this is not normal and talk about a few more things. I think that we will also get a 2nd opinion. I might even try to ask to do a couple of IUI as our insurance covers the whole thing. We shall see.

What have all of you done to move on or even cheer up???

Nayla82 · May 9, 2011

Sorry hun to hear your news :hugs:

Cry feel sorry for yourself... thats what i did to get it all out of my system... its looks like you had an excellent number of eggs and fertilisation Hun so thats a good thing :thumbup:

I think were both in the same boat its 'implantation' that tripped me up :nope:

i also popped in early to get a HCG test 9DP3DT it was 3.0 IU the doctor said go again in 2 days than it was 3.75 and she said it had to be 10 or over... it was teh worst day ever....

I have spent time with my husband trying to live as normal as possible, the DR told me she will scrape the uterus before the next try to make it stickier for the embryos, were hoping to start in the next few weeks :thumbup:

What did you mean when you said a traumatic Transfer? it was a little unconfortable and i could feel my bits locking up :blush:

she kept saying relax... :shrug:

Please dont give up hun i heard 2nd time the charm xx :hugs:

psp2011 · May 9, 2011

Ttcne, you know I am so sorry that your cycle didn't work but glad you came over to this thread, the ladies are great support. :thumbup:

I may have told you this, but I think time has been the best thing for me. Mine failed in Feb this year and it took at least a month for me to recover, both physically and mentally. I came back to it, using March and April to get stronger, and now I feel like I'm in such a better place than I was even before I started the last one. Do grieve though. You have to. Were you able to get time off work?
Oh, and I'm with Nayla. Why was the transfer so bad? You really need to check that out. The worst part of it for me was the full bladder! :hug:

Nayla, I just wanted to mention to you that I asked my nurse about the uterine scraping thing, as they didn't include that in my plan for this go-round :nope:

. She said they don't do it because it has shown that it can cause scar tissue. I don't want to worry you and I know you have to follow the advice of you FS and they all do things differently. But I had to let you know what mine said about it. Maybe research it some? :shrug:

Nayla82 · May 9, 2011

God bless you PSP i will google ASAP! :thumbup:

i just feel like a hamster just going with the flow in desperation for a baby :shrug:

and sometimes i wonder the harshness of the Uterus scraping last time is that causing all the spotting? it was very harsh and would not be surprised if it caused more damage than good... just the words 'uterus stickier' appealed to me :nope:

i will google now xx

psp2011 · May 9, 2011

Nayla82 said:
God bless you PSP i will google ASAP! i just feel like a hamster just going with the flow in desperation for a baby and sometimes i wonder the harshness of the Uterus scraping last time is that causing all the spotting? it was very harsh and would not be surprised if it caused more damage than good... just the words 'uterus stickier' appealed to me

i will google now xx

Ha, I liked that too! That's why I asked! What I am going to be doing is being put on some meds to help it stick, including Levonox (blood thinner), Methyl Prednisolone, (steroid) and another one I think. I'm hoping that it helps!
Let me know what you find out! :hugs:

Nayla82 · May 9, 2011

Oh PSP your so right why on earth did i not find this out before? :cry:

all i can found is many FS will not do it for IVF and it does cause unnecessary scarring in many women, one women had a healthy Uterus and since scraping it has gone bad from worse and 10 years on shes claims it was the scraping that prevented her pregnancy :cry:

I dont want her to damage what is ok in me! why didnt she tell me the bloody pros and cons... i was not even prepared :nope:

I was laying down for an Ultrasound the next minute i have a huge medal rod in me twisting and scraping :cry:

and it was all gone to waste as after that there was a bloody cyst! I cant stop crying now.... and what i read also that many women are put fully asleep or some pain relief... i was WIDE AWAKE and the pain was bone crushing it hurt so so badly, and i know for a fact only a few women can tolerate that kind of pain... :cry:

WHY THE HELL DID I ALLOW IT WITHOUT ASKING??

She wants to do another scraping on CD2 what the hell is this? am i some sort of experiment, it just felt WRONG :cry:

i will have a word with her which should be some time next week when my period comes... O h i so hope and pray that this didnt cause me any problems... :cry:

as im spotting like hell and what i have read people often spot lightly when a cyst goes... my heart tells me something is wrong and is linked to that scraping.... :cry:

i have just written down the meds that gave you hun, i will mention that, Thank the lord for you lovely women xx

oh lord...

psp2011 · May 9, 2011

Nayla82 said:
Oh PSP your so right why on earth did i not find this out before? all i can found is many FS will not do it for IVF and it does cause unnecessary scarring in many women, one women had a healthy Uterus and since scraping it has gone bad from worst and 10 years on shes claims he was the scraping that prevented her pregnancy

I dont want her to damage what is ok in me! why didnt she tell me the bloody pros and cons... i was not even prepared I was laying down for an Ultrasound the next minute i have a huge medal rod in me twisting and scraping and it was all gone to waste as after that there was a bloody cyst! I cant stop crying now.... and what i read also that many women are put fully asleep or some pain relief... i was WIDE AWAKE and the pain was bone crushing it hurt so so badly, and i know for a fact only a few women can tolerate that kind of pain... WHY THE HELL DID I ALLOW IT WITHOUT ASKING??

She wants to do another scraping on CD2 what the hell is this? am i some sort of experiment, it just felt WRONG i will have a word with her which should be some time next week when my period comes... O h i so hope and pray that this didnt cause me any problems... as im spotting like hell and what i have read people often spot lightly when a cyst goes... my heart tells me something is wrong and is linked to that scraping....

i have just written down the meds that gave you hun, i will mention that, Thank the lord for you lovely women xx

oh lord...

Nayla! oh gosh I'm sorry! :hugs:

I didn't mean to get you upset! :nope:

Is there any way you can go see another doctor? Or get a second opinion? I knew there was no way they should have done that to you without any pain meds at all! :nope:

I'm going to check with the nurse today if there are any other meds in my pile that have to do with the protocol to help the embies stick. I'll let you know.
Oh, I was thinking...did they put you on any antibiotics to prevent infection for the scraping? before and/or after? If not, it's okay. You would know if you had an infection brewwing. (fever, weakness, "just feeling crappy")
You are not the first one on here to mention scraping. :nope:

You should start a thread, I'd be interested to see how many others have had it and what their outcome was. Also if they had bleeding after. Wish I could give you a big hug right now. Chin up, it will be ok. :hug:

Nayla82 · May 9, 2011

The lords sends msgs in mysterious ways and im sure your msg is something for me to take in... IM GRATEFUL YOU ASKED HUN

After the scraping I just had a huge injection in my arm? never heard of antibiotics in an injection form... sounds like your in EXCELLENT hands hun, i just feel like a fool with my legs wide open letting her do as she pleases :cry:

Im waiting for my husband to get in... i just have a huge migrane... why didnt i see this before :nope:

NO WAY i will let her scrape me on CD2, i will see what she has to say, im praying for a CLEAR AND HEALTHY UTERUS, if all is clear its a 2nd chance from the lord, if i dont feel at ease i think we will have to go elsewhere... why didnt she even tell me the chances of bad things that could happen??? when it finished i said to my husband that was painful i hope she didnt mess me up... looking back now :cry:

I want CD2 to come ASAP

Nayla82 · May 9, 2011

God bless you PSP :hugs:

if you can tell me what drugs you will be on to help with implantation, maybe she needs to see what other Doctors are doing... there not poking people with rods... :growlmad:

Godforbid if it doesnt work 2nd time she may say well i scraped your uterus we did our best :shrug:

i just feel im already weak and scared and very fragile.. and i think im taken for granted :cry:

im SURE normal women would say 'hey hey what does it mean what is it for?' i just lay there like a looser :cry:

i NEED TO TELL MY HUSBAND EVERYTHING... im scared we have a crazy doctor :nope:

dont know what to think no more.

psp2011 · May 9, 2011

Nayla82 said:
The lords sends msgs in mysterious ways and im sure your msg is something for me to take in... IM GRATEFUL YOU ASKED HUN

After the scraping I just had a huge injection in my arm? never heard of antibiotics in an injection form... sounds like your in EXCELLENT hands hun, i just feel like a fool with my legs wide open letting her do as she pleases Im waiting for my husband to get in... i just have a huge migrane... why didnt i see this before

NO WAY i will let her scrape me on CD2, i will see what she has to say, im praying for a CLEAR AND HEALTHY UTERUS, if all is clear its a 2nd chance from the lord, if i dont feel at ease i think we will have to go elsewhere... why didnt she even tell me the chances of bad things that could happen??? when it finished i said to my husband that was painful i hope she didnt mess me up... looking back now

I want CD2 to come ASAP

I bet that was the antibiotics. It also could have been something for pain, but sounds like you would have known and would have felt better. You can get injectable antibiotics. They are usually in the arm or butt, depending on how much fluid is in the syringe.

Nayla82 said:
God bless you PSP if you can tell me what drugs you will be on to help with implantation, maybe she needs to see what other Doctors are doing... there not poking people with rods...

Godforbid if it doesnt work 2nd time she may say well i scraped your uterus we did our best

i just feel im already weak and scared and very fragile.. and i think im taken for granted im SURE normal women would say 'hey hey what does it mean what is it for?' i just lay there like a looser i NEED TO TELL MY HUSBAND EVERYTHING... im scared we have a crazy doctor dont know what to think no more.

oh, hun! You need to stop being so hard on your self! :hugs:

When I went through this my first time in '02, I didn't ask hardly any questions and just did what they said. (and it worked!) I feel a lot more informed now that I am a nurse and have been working as such for almost a year. Of course there is so much I don't know, so I ask a ton of questions. I call plenty and they don't mind. :nope:

Remember they are working for you! In fact I called today and asked about needles and then about the meds we talked about. She said it was the 2 I mentioned to you already and also a baby (81mg) aspirin. She said the methyl prednisolone (same as prednisone -steroid) will be taken 2 days before transfer until 2 days after. Then I will take the Lovenox and baby aspirin after that. I asked why didn't they give this to me before, just in case. They said they don't like to give these unless they are sure there is a problem with implantation because of the possible side effects. Your clotting time is increased so if you were in an accident, you could bleed much more and faster etc.
Seriously though, don't be so hard on yourself. You are not suppose to know it all! I think sometimes the medical professionals forget that they need to explain everything and shouldn't just assume the person gets it if they don't ask.
How long till CD2 do you think? :hugs:

Ttcne · May 9, 2011

psp2011 said:
Nayla82 said:

God bless you PSP i will google ASAP! i just feel like a hamster just going with the flow in desperation for a baby and sometimes i wonder the harshness of the Uterus scraping last time is that causing all the spotting? it was very harsh and would not be surprised if it caused more damage than good... just the words 'uterus stickier' appealed to me

i will google now xx

Click to expand...

Ha, I liked that too! That's why I asked! What I am going to be doing is being put on some meds to help it stick, including Levonox (blood thinner), Methyl Prednisolone, (steroid) and another one I think. I'm hoping that it helps!
Let me know what you find out!

I had a traumatic transfer than took almost 20 minutes. Apparently my cervix was difficult to penetrate. Which is odd as they had no trouble doing the sonohystogram 2 months earlier, same doctor, etc. She just told me that my cervix wasn't cooperating. She even had to use a special "clamp" which I assume to be a dilator to be able to thread the catheter. I bled quite a bit. I know cause I looked back as I was getting up. I would say that I had probably a 50cc blood loss which is bizarre.

I haven't heard from work yet about the leave. It would be nice to hear something.

I am going to ask for some of the immunology testing as I am sure that I at least have an excess of antithyroid antibody floating around as I have Graves disease (an autoimmune thyroid disorder).

Anyways my plan is to take leave and spend most of my time making a beautiful garden. I also plan on taking some weekend trips to Montana and Martha's Vineyard. I will drink coffee and alcohol and try to revel in the fact that maybe I have a little time to sit back and enjoy life. I would have much rather been pregnant but I will be a parent some how/way. Anyway will be good and hopefully this is all just a big, giant, sad life lesson.

psp2011 · May 9, 2011

oh, that's crazy you had so much trouble with the transfer! :wacko:

I had some excess blood loss after the EC, they even had to take me back into the surgery room to see if I was actively bleeding. It was only pooled blood as it turned out. Still pretty messy.
Sounds like you've got a good plan to relax! :thumbup:

Martha's Vineyard sounds so nice, I've only heard about it. Montana would be nice too I'm sure. :thumbup:

Hopefully you will get your leave soon so you can get a minute to relax.
Keep us posted on how you're doing hun. :hugs:

Quaver · May 12, 2011

Hi everyone, just got BFN on hpt :cry:

I think my eggs are too old. I'm nearly 40 :cry:

Ttcne · May 12, 2011

Quaver said:
Hi everyone, just got BFN on hpt
I think my eggs are too old. I'm nearly 40

Oh I am so sorry. It sucks! I don't know what to say to make it better. Just scream something inappropriate (or many things) and have a good cry. I found that helpful.
:hugs:

Lou32 · May 20, 2011

Hi everyone. It's been absolutely ages since I've called in to say hi. Hope everyone's doing well.
I'm booked in for my lap and dye on 10 June and I'm completely terrified. Hopefully we can start the second icsi after that though. Please please please let everything go well!!
So sorry to see more people join this thread though.
Quaver - sorry youg ot a bfn. I remember that feeling and it's absolutely horrible. You should pamper yourself and take care as it's a difficult time. Forty's not the end of the world though. While you're still producing eggs you can still get pregnant!

psp2011 · May 21, 2011

Quaver, I'm sorry about your BFN. :cry:

I hope you are doing okay. I know how hard it can be. Will you try again? :hugs:

Quaver · May 21, 2011

psp2011 said:
Quaver, I'm sorry about your BFN. I hope you are doing okay. I know how hard it can be. Will you try again?

Probably

We are looking at traditional Chinese medicine in the mean time.

Lainey27 · May 21, 2011

Hi everyone :flower:

. Quaver, i'm so sorry - I know how hard a BFN is - having just been through the same thing myself :hugs:

.
We had our review appt at the clinic on Tuesday, just to see what will happen with our next cycle. They are going to keep me on the same drugs & dosage as before. From their point of view, i responded really well, had 12 eggs and half fertilised - and they put 2 grade 1 embies back in - but I just didnt get the BPF. But as he said, no-one yet knows the secret of what makes them stick. I wish i knew - then i could share it with everyone who is as heartbroken as i am going through this process!
So it's now up to me when i want to try again. On one hand, i dont want to wait to long and am desperate to try again, and on the other hand, absolutely petrified that i end up with another BFN.....

MyHeartCries · May 22, 2011

Hi Ladies

I hope its ok that I join here. It feels comforting being around women who have similar experiences

I have just come out of a failed ICSI

I had 21 eggs collected, 20 injected, 14 fertilised and 1 perfect embie transferred on day 4. Two weeks later (last Thursday) I had my BFN

I have three snow babies frozen on day 5. I have been TTC for nearly 5 years and am starting to feel like I'm running out of time. I have really high FSH level (10.9) which suggests diminishing egg supplies

My next appointment with the FS is on 23rd June so praying for them to get us moving with a new cycle

not giving up just yet

Sorry for the essay! Xxxxx

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