It's hard not to be a miserable cow with all of this! I really don't want to be that either but I have come to the point where I resent having to put on a brave face. It's just so personal. It's not the kind of thing that you easily share with work colleagues for example. But I also feel that people don't really understand if they haven't been there themselves.
Support Group failed IVF/ICSI IUI or any failed assisted conceptions 2014
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Wallie
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I totally agree with you too, it's really a tough one and you've to be picky with who you do tell. Some just don't get it one bit and honestly can't believe the way you are feeling, that makes it even more upsetting that you can't count on someone you think you could.
I'm not at the point of adoption but it has crossed my mind a couple of times over the last few weeks. I just don't know what to think about it all yet. I do desperately want to have a baby myself but if it comes to it I will seriously consider it.
Hi Ann27
I have been a 'miserable cow' for nearly 2 weeks now and if that's the way I need to feel to get through this then that's what I am gonna feel and too bad for everyone else.
I resent having to put on a brave fact too. Last night I was out and I was sitting with two women - who I didn't really know all that well - and they were raving on and on about their kids, others kids and kids they probably didn't even know. I just wanted to scream 'WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP!' Of course they don't know about our failed IVFs but it was tempting.
Feel what you need to - it's al normal and part of the grieving process.
I have been a 'miserable cow' for nearly 2 weeks now and if that's the way I need to feel to get through this then that's what I am gonna feel and too bad for everyone else.
I resent having to put on a brave fact too. Last night I was out and I was sitting with two women - who I didn't really know all that well - and they were raving on and on about their kids, others kids and kids they probably didn't even know. I just wanted to scream 'WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP!' Of course they don't know about our failed IVFs but it was tempting.
Feel what you need to - it's al normal and part of the grieving process.
Wallie
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Hi Ann27
I have been a 'miserable cow' for nearly 2 weeks now and if that's the way I need to feel to get through this then that's what I am gonna feel and too bad for everyone else.
I resent having to put on a brave fact too. Last night I was out and I was sitting with two women - who I didn't really know all that well - and they were raving on and on about their kids, others kids and kids they probably didn't even know. I just wanted to scream 'WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP!' Of course they don't know about our failed IVFs but it was tempting.
Feel what you need to - it's al normal and part of the grieving process.
Yeah, that's one of the things that peeves me off about women who have kids. All they talk about is their kids, it's as if they've nothing left to talk about. I would love to be like that too but I find it boring and insensitive if they full well know I've been married 8 years with no kids. If I was them, I would think to myself that if that's the case surely we don't want kids or can't have any, so shut up!
Lolly1985
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hi ladies
Here here to you all!! People do sometimes need to just read between the lines and shut up about babies! The hot topic in the staff room at the moment it 'when im pregnant...' It makes me want to scream, like its a given! I mean i wouldnt wish this on anyone but sometimes people need to think that nothing is a given in this world and what is given is a gift. Grrr!
On the adoption topic i have looked into this and have spoken to social services for more information. Maybe i shouldnt be, maybe i should be focusing on this cycle but it comforts me to know that if this fails again there is still hope. It just comes in a different way. The lady was lovely and gave lots of advice and then a social worker followed up a couple of days later. They told me as it is, not all rosey but a tough journey with many ups and downs. She said sometimes people quit half way through but i just feel if we have made it this far with all the heartache we can do anything. Of course i would love to be pregnant but thats 9 months. If we are to be blessed with a child, whatever way they are given to us, then that love lasts a lifetime.
My thoughts with you all. Love Lolly x x x x x
Here here to you all!! People do sometimes need to just read between the lines and shut up about babies! The hot topic in the staff room at the moment it 'when im pregnant...' It makes me want to scream, like its a given! I mean i wouldnt wish this on anyone but sometimes people need to think that nothing is a given in this world and what is given is a gift. Grrr!
On the adoption topic i have looked into this and have spoken to social services for more information. Maybe i shouldnt be, maybe i should be focusing on this cycle but it comforts me to know that if this fails again there is still hope. It just comes in a different way. The lady was lovely and gave lots of advice and then a social worker followed up a couple of days later. They told me as it is, not all rosey but a tough journey with many ups and downs. She said sometimes people quit half way through but i just feel if we have made it this far with all the heartache we can do anything. Of course i would love to be pregnant but thats 9 months. If we are to be blessed with a child, whatever way they are given to us, then that love lasts a lifetime.
My thoughts with you all. Love Lolly x x x x x
Thank you, ladies! So good to have some feedback!
About the insensitivity of others: I sometimes think I was probably one of those people who put her foot in it myself years ago before I realised I would ever have a problem with this. People say the stupidest things because they have never thought of this, never experienced it and having a baby is the most normal, natural thing in the world for most of the population. I think until about a year ago or so even I kind of just expected it to happen eventually. Somewhere along the way, it would work out. But no matter what we do and how hard we try, this is just completely out of our control which I find very hard to accept.
So, yes, I agree I don't wish it on anybody but a bit of thought and consideration and appreciation for the miracle that a pregnancy is in the first place wouldn't go amiss sometimes.
About the insensitivity of others: I sometimes think I was probably one of those people who put her foot in it myself years ago before I realised I would ever have a problem with this. People say the stupidest things because they have never thought of this, never experienced it and having a baby is the most normal, natural thing in the world for most of the population. I think until about a year ago or so even I kind of just expected it to happen eventually. Somewhere along the way, it would work out. But no matter what we do and how hard we try, this is just completely out of our control which I find very hard to accept.
So, yes, I agree I don't wish it on anybody but a bit of thought and consideration and appreciation for the miracle that a pregnancy is in the first place wouldn't go amiss sometimes.
Wallie
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I was speaking to a Counsellor today, first time, and I was speaking about how I've had to take a wide bearth with some friends who are pregnant especially my best friend. She struggled for a while too to get pregnant but I find her insensitive and very full of herself even though she knows my situation.
I also spoke about my colleague which I'm covering maternity leave for and I got on really well with her whilst she trained me before going off.
It's odd that I can deal with one girl being pregnant and not the other but I've now realised today the reason I get on with the girl who I am covering for at work, it's because she still can't believe she is pregnant, even at 39 weeks! Basically she appreciates being pregnant whilst the other one doesn't.
Anyway just thought I'd put this down in writing.
Wallie
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Yes, I think it has helped. I found it has been the only time where my OH and I have sat and talked about not yet having a baby for an hour and a half constantly. Certainly without any tears and tantrums. It was good to have a mediator and she asked how we truly felt about it all and how and who we speak to etc.
It was good as we didn't know anything about her and just sat and talked. I'm going back as it was so helpful so I would recommend even if you just went the once to see how you got on.
She thought I should have some hobbies for myself and relax more. I've always fancied yoga, so I may do that and of course Zumba's all the craze here just now, so I may do that. She also recommended a website for relaxation techniques called MoodCafe. So I'll check that out too.
One other thing was to stop waiting on when we have a baby, do the things we want to and look ahead to other things other than having a baby. If the baby comes we just fit it in around everything else. Basically stop putting life on hold for when ...
Lou32
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Hi guys. I'm finding it seriously tough at the moment. If anything, feeling progressively worse about this BFN. Since the follow up, and the doc said we had to prepare ourselves in case it might not happen, I've lost all hope and it's breaking my heart. Every day is such a struggle. I've never felt like this before. Seriously, how do you get through this? Lolly - I've found myself looking up info on adoption recently, but the whole process seems terrifying. Every website goes to great lengths to say it's almost impossible to adopt a baby and they are usually older children, often with serious issues. It's scary stuff! I just can't get my head round the fact I might never experience being pregnant and never hold my baby. I'm sorry to drag the mood down, I'm just finding it all too painful at the moment and don't know what to do.x
Lolly1985
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Oh Lou
Im so sorry you are feeling this way. I think we can all sympathise with the awful emotions going round your head at the moment. It seems so cruel, unfair and desperate. Of course we are all here for you 100% but have you thought about speaking to someone? It works for some, not for others. I only saw a councellor after first failed, but it did me the world of good. And Wallie seems to be having positive results to. Its worth thinking about, and althouth it wont change the outcome, it may change the way you view it? I know if my clinic was nearer I would have seen her again this time.
Your doc sounds cold. I know they have to be realistic and I guess maybe the tough love attitude works in some instances, but not this. They havent said it will never happen, so surely while there is still hope they should be focusing everything on that chance, and ploughing everything they medically can into making it happen? Or at least dont say it until theyve exhausted each avenue. They say that many do get lucky on their third time so they shouldnt write you off. Know I just need to follow my own advice now...
With regard to adoption, yes it is super scary! Like you I have read lots of scare stories and when I spoke to the woman on the phone she told me kind of the worst case scenario. But I think they have to make you aware as otherwise any glitch down the line and people might not be able to deal with it. She said that some have backed out half way through because they were simply not prepared for some of the implications so I guess they almost need to scare you initially to make sure the people who proceed are 100% committed. I have worked with children for 10 years now and have seen many adoptive families during my time. Generally the children have been adopted at around 12 months, but one was 7 months and one family adopted two brothers, one being 18 months and the other a newborn. One little girl I used to look after was born addicted to drugs, but we only found this out a lot later down the line. And you would never ever have known. She is the picture of health and happiness, and such a bright little button. Its so scary but I know it can come good.
I have also been looking at adoption overseas and came to Russia. Adoption there follows much the same process as here, and you have to pay the legal fees so can be costly, but it is much more likely you will adopt a younger baby. There are many orphanages there, where there are healthy babies who have sadly been abandoned. I watched a video and sobbed at the weekend about this couple who adopted there and brought their baby home. They said thank you god for the burden of infertility as without this we would not have brought out angel home. Was a wreck! I hope to post a video like this one day. I know Im writing try 3 off, but in my heart I dont feel it will work. But then I guess who really knows, we have to remain hopeful I suppose, hard as it is.
Lovely, the pain will ease, but of course it will never go away until you hold your child in your arms. And who knows how it will happen, but it will. Your destiny is to be a mum and sometimes we just have to fight harder than others. But if you want it enough you will have it. Never apologise for being down. That is what this thread is here for. Its one that no one ever wants to post in but rest assured that when you do others will understand, you are not alone. My thoughts are with you. Stay strong Lou xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Im so sorry you are feeling this way. I think we can all sympathise with the awful emotions going round your head at the moment. It seems so cruel, unfair and desperate. Of course we are all here for you 100% but have you thought about speaking to someone? It works for some, not for others. I only saw a councellor after first failed, but it did me the world of good. And Wallie seems to be having positive results to. Its worth thinking about, and althouth it wont change the outcome, it may change the way you view it? I know if my clinic was nearer I would have seen her again this time.
Your doc sounds cold. I know they have to be realistic and I guess maybe the tough love attitude works in some instances, but not this. They havent said it will never happen, so surely while there is still hope they should be focusing everything on that chance, and ploughing everything they medically can into making it happen? Or at least dont say it until theyve exhausted each avenue. They say that many do get lucky on their third time so they shouldnt write you off. Know I just need to follow my own advice now...
With regard to adoption, yes it is super scary! Like you I have read lots of scare stories and when I spoke to the woman on the phone she told me kind of the worst case scenario. But I think they have to make you aware as otherwise any glitch down the line and people might not be able to deal with it. She said that some have backed out half way through because they were simply not prepared for some of the implications so I guess they almost need to scare you initially to make sure the people who proceed are 100% committed. I have worked with children for 10 years now and have seen many adoptive families during my time. Generally the children have been adopted at around 12 months, but one was 7 months and one family adopted two brothers, one being 18 months and the other a newborn. One little girl I used to look after was born addicted to drugs, but we only found this out a lot later down the line. And you would never ever have known. She is the picture of health and happiness, and such a bright little button. Its so scary but I know it can come good.
I have also been looking at adoption overseas and came to Russia. Adoption there follows much the same process as here, and you have to pay the legal fees so can be costly, but it is much more likely you will adopt a younger baby. There are many orphanages there, where there are healthy babies who have sadly been abandoned. I watched a video and sobbed at the weekend about this couple who adopted there and brought their baby home. They said thank you god for the burden of infertility as without this we would not have brought out angel home. Was a wreck! I hope to post a video like this one day. I know Im writing try 3 off, but in my heart I dont feel it will work. But then I guess who really knows, we have to remain hopeful I suppose, hard as it is.
Lovely, the pain will ease, but of course it will never go away until you hold your child in your arms. And who knows how it will happen, but it will. Your destiny is to be a mum and sometimes we just have to fight harder than others. But if you want it enough you will have it. Never apologise for being down. That is what this thread is here for. Its one that no one ever wants to post in but rest assured that when you do others will understand, you are not alone. My thoughts are with you. Stay strong Lou xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi Ladies,
I had my ET on the 9th Sept, I started bleeding 7DPT heavy to me a normal AF with clotting (red) for 2 days, I phone the clinic and they adviced me to carry on with the prostrogen as my OTD is this coming friday, i have no symptoms and have done a couple of early pregnacy test. I no that is was over for me and dont want to test again on friday just to have it confirmed. It is such a cruel time to go through. I know I have children and should be blessed with what i have but i so wanted to give my hubby to be a gift of a child. Why did i ever let my ex talk me into being sterilised. I am still devatasted. My friends are not supportive towards me as they cant understand why i am doing it in the first place. I am sorry to ramble on but i just cant shake this feeling of dread that i have going around my head at the moment xx
I had my ET on the 9th Sept, I started bleeding 7DPT heavy to me a normal AF with clotting (red) for 2 days, I phone the clinic and they adviced me to carry on with the prostrogen as my OTD is this coming friday, i have no symptoms and have done a couple of early pregnacy test. I no that is was over for me and dont want to test again on friday just to have it confirmed. It is such a cruel time to go through. I know I have children and should be blessed with what i have but i so wanted to give my hubby to be a gift of a child. Why did i ever let my ex talk me into being sterilised. I am still devatasted. My friends are not supportive towards me as they cant understand why i am doing it in the first place. I am sorry to ramble on but i just cant shake this feeling of dread that i have going around my head at the moment xx
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Oh crap Lou, is that what they said?
That just seems so negative of them, i thought the odds increased for the first 3 rounds and it's therafter you have to prepare yourself for the dreaded 'never'?I've just failed my 2nd round too, with 2 blasts on board. On the whole, asides my BFN of course my 2nd cycle seemed to go better that my first (where we had 22 eggs fail to fertilize so had a 2 day transfer). My lining was dreadful again (not even 7mm) and tbh if we can't sort that there really is no point in me repeatedly paying almost £5k for IVF cycles.
Sucks to be us on this thread, right?
Lou32
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Oh Nell, I'm so sorry. And sounds like similar story to us - the second go went better than the first, but still didn't work. It's like some cruel joke because you start to think it might actually be your turn. It's truly sh*t. I don't know much about lining problems, but can't they do anything about that? I'm sure it's still pretty raw for you, so I guess you have to find your answers in your own time.
I don't know about the odds tbh. I've read that the odds get worse with each go and I've also read they get better with each go. Who knows. Our last clinic had a nurse who told us that if it doesn't work after three times it will NEVER work. I find that hard to believe and the clinic I'm at now said it simply wasn't true...It sounds like things went much better for you, I'm just so sorry about the outcome....
Lolly - Thank you so much for your post. You're totally right (about everything!) and I can't understand why he couldn't have been more positive about putting everything into the next go. I have a real problem with doctors and tend to take a disliking to them v easily, but this doctor I had a good feeling about from the start because of his directness. Thing is I really feel like he let us down with our follow-up, gave no real advice and, although he couldn't identify anything concrete which had gone wrong, he seemed to just give up on us. I just can't decide whether to stay with him or not....It's all such a mental battle.
With the adoption thing, I understand they have to be realistic, but the whole thing terrifies me. It also terrifies me that I could adopt a child and they'll keep contact with their birth parents and want to go back to them. Does that sound stupid? I know someone who is adopted and he looked up his birth parents when he was 18 and now he includes them in every family occasion. I feel so bad for his adopted parents who brought him up. It's funny you should mention the adoption from Russia, because I had started to read more about adoption from abroad, but again, so much to put you off, especially with the expense. I mean, are we talking tens of thousands? Is that a viable option for ordinary people? I realise you might not know, it's just I suppose these questions go round in your head...
I've been to see a counsellor twice since this last BFN and, although the first time I felt a bit better, I've since been to see her after my follow-up and nothing seems to be budging this dark cloud. I don't think I've ever felt so completely hopeless for so long.
We have an appointment with Mr Patel, the immunologist at Care M'cr in a couple of weeks (more expense!), so maybe he might be able to give us some options which might help. Although the level one immune tests might be an option if the nice GP will agree to do them, the level 2 ones aren't at the moment at least. They quoted £2.5K for these tests alone!
Hope everyone else is OK and I'm so sorry we all have to post here. I suppose the only positive thing about it is to know that it's normal to feel like this and we can help each other through it...
Take care everyone
xxx
I don't know about the odds tbh. I've read that the odds get worse with each go and I've also read they get better with each go. Who knows. Our last clinic had a nurse who told us that if it doesn't work after three times it will NEVER work. I find that hard to believe and the clinic I'm at now said it simply wasn't true...It sounds like things went much better for you, I'm just so sorry about the outcome....
Lolly - Thank you so much for your post. You're totally right (about everything!) and I can't understand why he couldn't have been more positive about putting everything into the next go. I have a real problem with doctors and tend to take a disliking to them v easily, but this doctor I had a good feeling about from the start because of his directness. Thing is I really feel like he let us down with our follow-up, gave no real advice and, although he couldn't identify anything concrete which had gone wrong, he seemed to just give up on us. I just can't decide whether to stay with him or not....It's all such a mental battle.
With the adoption thing, I understand they have to be realistic, but the whole thing terrifies me. It also terrifies me that I could adopt a child and they'll keep contact with their birth parents and want to go back to them. Does that sound stupid? I know someone who is adopted and he looked up his birth parents when he was 18 and now he includes them in every family occasion. I feel so bad for his adopted parents who brought him up. It's funny you should mention the adoption from Russia, because I had started to read more about adoption from abroad, but again, so much to put you off, especially with the expense. I mean, are we talking tens of thousands? Is that a viable option for ordinary people? I realise you might not know, it's just I suppose these questions go round in your head...
I've been to see a counsellor twice since this last BFN and, although the first time I felt a bit better, I've since been to see her after my follow-up and nothing seems to be budging this dark cloud. I don't think I've ever felt so completely hopeless for so long.
We have an appointment with Mr Patel, the immunologist at Care M'cr in a couple of weeks (more expense!), so maybe he might be able to give us some options which might help. Although the level one immune tests might be an option if the nice GP will agree to do them, the level 2 ones aren't at the moment at least. They quoted £2.5K for these tests alone!
Hope everyone else is OK and I'm so sorry we all have to post here. I suppose the only positive thing about it is to know that it's normal to feel like this and we can help each other through it...
Take care everyone
xxx
Lou32
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Delly - I'm so sorry. I really hope that you're wrong, but if it's not to be then it must be hard for both you and your OH. Sounds like your friends could do with being more supportive. I always think you can't judge someone else unless you've been in that position and they have no idea how it feels to be in your position.x
Lolly1985
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Hello everyone
Lou, the website I looked at quoted around 15k which is an awful lot. I don't know if you have to pay all up front or pay as you go (which would be far more manageable). Ukkk, it really is horrible. But I know DP would prefer this as the child is much younger and the chances of tracing birth parents - something he really struggles with - is extremly remote. I don't know how I feel about birth parents to be honest. I almost think that if you give a child the very best of you they should have no reason to. But know thats unrealistic, curiosity and questions are a given I guess. I know I can be quite jealous though so I admit it does really scare me.
I hope your appointment with the immunologist goes better than with your other doc. It must be very hard to decide what to do, especially paying private.
The cloud will lift but I guess no one can say when. I know its horrible living with all this on your shoulders. I can't remember a time when I didn't carry this hurt around. It sucks so bad, it physically hurts if I let it. Sometimes I manage to push it away and be upbeat. I think now my good days outweigh the bad but it will never go until we have our families. I guess its just waiting for things to ease slightly. It will lovely because it has to. And we are all here for you.
Nell and Delly, so sorry to have had to join us here. Nell you are like me and Lou, having has 2 failed attempts. Its so sad because I had convinced myself that the first go was a trial run and they would tweak everything and second cycle would be different.
Love to you both and hope these early days are bearable. This thread is great to let all the emotions tumble out and not worry what people think as more than likely we have felt/are feeling exactly the same.
Well I'm off to the clinic tomorrow to collect my medication for third attempt. I can't believe I am here again. I know I should be so grateful and please don't think I am not, but a big part of me can't face doing this all over again....
Lots of love, Lolly xxxxx
Lou, the website I looked at quoted around 15k which is an awful lot. I don't know if you have to pay all up front or pay as you go (which would be far more manageable). Ukkk, it really is horrible. But I know DP would prefer this as the child is much younger and the chances of tracing birth parents - something he really struggles with - is extremly remote. I don't know how I feel about birth parents to be honest. I almost think that if you give a child the very best of you they should have no reason to. But know thats unrealistic, curiosity and questions are a given I guess. I know I can be quite jealous though so I admit it does really scare me.
I hope your appointment with the immunologist goes better than with your other doc. It must be very hard to decide what to do, especially paying private.
The cloud will lift but I guess no one can say when. I know its horrible living with all this on your shoulders. I can't remember a time when I didn't carry this hurt around. It sucks so bad, it physically hurts if I let it. Sometimes I manage to push it away and be upbeat. I think now my good days outweigh the bad but it will never go until we have our families. I guess its just waiting for things to ease slightly. It will lovely because it has to. And we are all here for you.
Nell and Delly, so sorry to have had to join us here. Nell you are like me and Lou, having has 2 failed attempts. Its so sad because I had convinced myself that the first go was a trial run and they would tweak everything and second cycle would be different.
Love to you both and hope these early days are bearable. This thread is great to let all the emotions tumble out and not worry what people think as more than likely we have felt/are feeling exactly the same.Well I'm off to the clinic tomorrow to collect my medication for third attempt. I can't believe I am here again. I know I should be so grateful and please don't think I am not, but a big part of me can't face doing this all over again....
Lots of love, Lolly xxxxx
Lolly1985
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Delly I'm so sorry. I know what you mean about feeling a failure, I do to. My counsellor said that i'm not and that it is a joint process and no one knows why these things happen. But when its your body its so hard not to feel responsible. I have lots of probs (DP is fine) so I feel so guilty for all this, I think it must be natural from others comments. But doesn't make it an y easier. I sometimes find it hard to understand why DP is with me when I can't give him what many others can. He is so sweet and says he would rather have me but I know he aches for a child. It truely is a sh*tty feeling isn't it. Sending you my love xxxxxxxxxx
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Lolly and Lou - thanks for your wishes. TBH I don't feel too bad, it feels wrong just admitting that tbh as when I started this cycle I thought I'd lose it totally if it failed. I just feel sad but nothing more really (yet?), no tears anyway, mainly because I've always just felt this was never going to happen for me. I thought positive thoughts this whole cycle, but i had to force myself because really I just didn't believe i'd get a BFP.
I keep trying to tell myself that my life with out children is ok, we're happy and healthy but tbh I think what angers me most if that it wouldn't be a choice, being child-free will be forced on us by my failing body.
DH isn't prepared to look at adoption and tbh I did a little googling and as we move around (countries) we wouldn't be eligible in any case.
Delly - I am so sorry you have had the break through bleeding. I bled, AF, on day 12 after EC (so 10days after my 2 day transfer). This cycle I have also started AF through my progesterone on day 13. My clinic say this is ok but it concerns me that the progesterone isn't supportive enough, I use crinone.
I don't think I mentioned earlier but this cycle has been extra hard because I think something did happen, an almost pregnant. On day 11 (after EC) I had the strangest cramps i've ever had lasting about 4 or 5 minutes, too late for implantation surely?. On day 12 I tested early and got the faintest of squinters on a FRER. I've never ever had a squinter before. Day 13 bleeding started and OTD a stark white BFN. I tested out the trigger so the squinter was real, my body obviously had some HCG from the embryo (s) but I guess implantation failed. I wonder if my lining had been better or my progesterone levels checked if i could have hung onto that little embryo better?
I keep trying to tell myself that my life with out children is ok, we're happy and healthy but tbh I think what angers me most if that it wouldn't be a choice, being child-free will be forced on us by my failing body.
DH isn't prepared to look at adoption and tbh I did a little googling and as we move around (countries) we wouldn't be eligible in any case.
Delly - I am so sorry you have had the break through bleeding. I bled, AF, on day 12 after EC (so 10days after my 2 day transfer). This cycle I have also started AF through my progesterone on day 13. My clinic say this is ok but it concerns me that the progesterone isn't supportive enough, I use crinone.
I don't think I mentioned earlier but this cycle has been extra hard because I think something did happen, an almost pregnant. On day 11 (after EC) I had the strangest cramps i've ever had lasting about 4 or 5 minutes, too late for implantation surely?. On day 12 I tested early and got the faintest of squinters on a FRER. I've never ever had a squinter before. Day 13 bleeding started and OTD a stark white BFN. I tested out the trigger so the squinter was real, my body obviously had some HCG from the embryo (s) but I guess implantation failed. I wonder if my lining had been better or my progesterone levels checked if i could have hung onto that little embryo better?
_Nell
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Lolly - can I ask have you had your endo treated in any way before proceeding with an IVF cycle? I didn't know i had endo but i've had pre-menstrual spotting since coming off the BCP and then on this, my 2nd IVF, they found some endometrioma cysts on my ovaries. I'm just wondering if i should have a lap to help my odds or just keep ploughing on really with IVF (DH has agreed to a 3rd and last try). I've asked Dr's but the medical community seem divided on whether to treat endo before IVF or not.
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