-*-TBH-*-

[smoore]

I can see how that would be hurtful. I saw this quite a bit when I was pregnant with my first. It's good to know just bc people (myself included) are feeling horrible due to pregnancy doesn't mean they aren't embracing it and feel lucky as hell to be in such a position. 'Complaining' is just a way of discussing pregnancy and everything that goes with it. The amount of excitement and the amount of complaining shouldn't go hand in hand...one doesn't lessen the other.

I get it, I do. Which is why I saved my "release" for this thread and haven't said anything to anyone who is complaining. I would never judge anyone for complaining or say they should just be thankful or anything. It is just how I feel personally.

I don't think anyone should have to just be silent about everything. I also worried about posting this at all, because I didn't want people to think I'm not an understanding person. I just felt like I needed to get it out there.

For what it's worth, I'm more talking about the "I just can't even handle being pregnant people". I understand it is a valid feeling. I just have a hard time listening to it. I had to hear a "good" friend tell me when she was at the same point I lost my son that she just couldn't handle it and wished her daughter would just be born already and she would completely fine with it if she would be born that day. (30 weeks)

Anyway, I posted kind of impulsively and genuinely don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I am supportive of everyone. I just needed to get it off my chest.

 

[kissesandhugs]

I can see how that would be hurtful. I saw this quite a bit when I was pregnant with my first. It's good to know just bc people (myself included) are feeling horrible due to pregnancy doesn't mean they aren't embracing it and feel lucky as hell to be in such a position. 'Complaining' is just a way of discussing pregnancy and everything that goes with it. The amount of excitement and the amount of complaining shouldn't go hand in hand...one doesn't lessen the other.

I get it, I do. Which is why I saved my "release" for this thread and haven't said anything to anyone who is complaining. I would never judge anyone for complaining or say they should just be thankful or anything. It is just how I feel personally.

I don't think anyone should have to just be silent about everything. I also worried about posting this at all, because I didn't want people to think I'm not an understanding person. I just felt like I needed to get it out there.

For what it's worth, I'm more talking about the "I just can't even handle being pregnant people". I understand it is a valid feeling. I just have a hard time listening to it. I had to hear a "good" friend tell me when she was at the same point I lost my son that she just couldn't handle it and wished her daughter would just be born already and she would completely fine with it if she would be born that day. (30 weeks)

Anyway, I posted kind of impulsively and genuinely don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. I am supportive of everyone. I just needed to get it off my chest.

that's understandable. Sorry for your loss and I agree your friends comment was uncalled for

 

[JumpingIn]

Sorry for your loss lovely. What your friend said was truly insensitive.

I'm someone who's suffering terribly with symptoms and has needed to vent about it but is still absolutely thrilled beyond belief to finally be pregnant, I honestly wouldn't trade it for anything, I already love my little bean. Reading your post didn't put me on the defensive, but it did make me have a moment of gratitude for my pregnancy You deserve to voice what you're feeling.

 

[smoore]

Thank you. I truly appreciate the *nice* responses. I worried after I posted it that I should have just kept it to myself.

 

[misspriss]

TBH, DH was quite an ass this morning, but he's kind of made it up. For some reason he thinks he deserves to stay up late then sleep in on our day off, but someone still has to get up with our son, which means the only day I could possibly sleep in (when we are both off) he always does. And I'm pregnant and don't feel well. But then he made brunch and we DTD so I am less grumpy about it. It is his day off too and his job is more demanding than mine...

 

[smoore]

TBH, DH was quite an ass this morning, but he's kind of made it up. For some reason he thinks he deserves to stay up late then sleep in on our day off, but someone still has to get up with our son, which means the only day I could possibly sleep in (when we are both off) he always does. And I'm pregnant and don't feel well. But then he made brunch and we DTD so I am less grumpy about it. It is his day off too and his job is more demanding than mine...

That stinks. I would want a chance to sleep in too. Maybe you can come up with a system (when everyone is in a good mood) of taking turns getting up with your son, so each person gets to sleep in at least every other week?

 

[Sarah1508]

Smoore I totaly understand where you are coming from and your friend was pretty out of line saying what she did! I'm sorry for your loss you must be a really strong person to have got through something like that and congratulations on this pregnancy you sound like you will be a great mummy

 

[Sarah1508]

Tbh I have finally have my first midwife appointment tomorrow! not like I'm nine weeks along or anything and you are ment to be seen well before that guess they are just busy at this time of year with it getting cold for the winter lots of people getting pregnant.... got to keep warm somehow....

 

[Angie_M]

Great discussions on this thread. Smoore your post made me stop and think and feel very grateful. Keep the chats and venting coming ladies!

TBH.. I can't believe how many people think it's appropriate to ask 'when are you going to have a baby?!'. Even now that I'm pregnant I find it offensive/presumptuous/rude. Honestly.. have been married for 3 years and between work colleagues and relatives (never friends, they know better) I am asked at least once or twice a week. Mind your own business nosy people!

 

[misspriss]

TBH, DH was quite an ass this morning, but he's kind of made it up. For some reason he thinks he deserves to stay up late then sleep in on our day off, but someone still has to get up with our son, which means the only day I could possibly sleep in (when we are both off) he always does. And I'm pregnant and don't feel well. But then he made brunch and we DTD so I am less grumpy about it. It is his day off too and his job is more demanding than mine...

That stinks. I would want a chance to sleep in too. Maybe you can come up with a system (when everyone is in a good mood) of taking turns getting up with your son, so each person gets to sleep in at least every other week?

We've talked about it, and the one time there was a Monday holiday right after he let me sleep in for the 1 (one, yes one) time he's EVER taken the baby and let me sleep in, I was sick. It would be so much easier if we both had Sat/Sun off, but he has to get up early every other day of the week BUT Sunday and go to work, earlier than me (I get up about 20 minutes after him) but he works a longer work days than me. Since I cosleep with DS, and he usually sleeps in the other room, I have no option BUT to get up when DS does.

 

[smoore]

Smoore I totaly understand where you are coming from and your friend was pretty out of line saying what she did! I'm sorry for your loss you must be a really strong person to have got through something like that and congratulations on this pregnancy you sound like you will be a great mummy

Thank you. That's so sweet of you. Yeah, I pretty much wanted to smack said friend but didn't! ha ha

Great discussions on this thread. Smoore your post made me stop and think and feel very grateful. Keep the chats and venting coming ladies!

TBH.. I can't believe how many people think it's appropriate to ask 'when are you going to have a baby?!'. Even now that I'm pregnant I find it offensive/presumptuous/rude. Honestly.. have been married for 3 years and between work colleagues and relatives (never friends, they know better) I am asked at least once or twice a week. Mind your own business nosy people!

Thank you.

I can't believe people feel the need to ask that either! It truly is no one's business! Even after our loss we constantly got "when are you going to try again??" ... um none of your business. We got asked this within weeks of losing him.

TBH, DH was quite an ass this morning, but he's kind of made it up. For some reason he thinks he deserves to stay up late then sleep in on our day off, but someone still has to get up with our son, which means the only day I could possibly sleep in (when we are both off) he always does. And I'm pregnant and don't feel well. But then he made brunch and we DTD so I am less grumpy about it. It is his day off too and his job is more demanding than mine...

That stinks. I would want a chance to sleep in too. Maybe you can come up with a system (when everyone is in a good mood) of taking turns getting up with your son, so each person gets to sleep in at least every other week?

We've talked about it, and the one time there was a Monday holiday right after he let me sleep in for the 1 (one, yes one) time he's EVER taken the baby and let me sleep in, I was sick. It would be so much easier if we both had Sat/Sun off, but he has to get up early every other day of the week BUT Sunday and go to work, earlier than me (I get up about 20 minutes after him) but he works a longer work days than me. Since I cosleep with DS, and he usually sleeps in the other room, I have no option BUT to get up when DS does.

Ah, that would make it more difficult. Someday, you will sleep again!

 

[kellze]

TBH I am slightly annoyed (mostly happy though) that ALL my siblings stole my pregnancy thunder by announcing pregnancies within three weeks of me. One of them (who has NEVER EVER wanted his own children) is having twins.

My poor mum is going to be quilting non stop

 

[Marlarky]

TBH I wish my OH wanted this baby as bad as I do. He wants it, but won't talk about it with me and I feel so alone :/ It's like it's a taboo subject.

 

[smoore]

TBH I wish my OH wanted this baby as bad as I do. He wants it, but won't talk about it with me and I feel so alone :/ It's like it's a taboo subject.

Do you think it may be because it is early on? I know my DH is kind of cautious about talking about things because of how early it is right now. That makes it hard if he pretty much refuses to talk with you though.

 

[Angie_M]

TBH I wish my OH wanted this baby as bad as I do. He wants it, but won't talk about it with me and I feel so alone :/ It's like it's a taboo subject.

Do you think it may be because it is early on? I know my DH is kind of cautious about talking about things because of how early it is right now. That makes it hard if he pretty much refuses to talk with you though.

Hi Marlarky, I was going to ask the same thing.. how far along are you? And is this your first? My DH who is usually very open with me was pretty quiet for the first little while..I spoke to him about it and turns out he was terrified of getting too excited in case things didn't work out. I explained that I needed him to be excited and to acknowledge that things were HAPPENING and since then it's been great.

 

[Marlarky]

Thanks ladies, it was just a huge surprise. It's not my first, I have a 3 year old, but it's his first and he swears his life is over now.He's getting more used to it I think, but hopefully after my ultrasound tomorrow I'll get a reaction out of him!!!

 

[Angie_M]

I guess sometimes it's hard for the guys too because for them, nothing really changes (except for their partner's entire appearance, demeanour etc!). I'm sure once he sees the ultrasound it will be much more real

 

[mummy2o]

TBH I wish my OH wanted this baby as bad as I do. He wants it, but won't talk about it with me and I feel so alone :/ It's like it's a taboo subject.

My OH wouldn't talk about his daughter until she was born. We suffered an early loss prior to her, but even after 12 weeks it was hard to talk to him. So I just chat away to him anyway and hope he responds. This time he's a little more optimistic.

TBH why do I have to get my bloods done today. They couldn't do them at my booking in appointment, so got to go and see the nurse today in an hour and a half I hate people poking me. I also need to phone the midwife, who doesn't work in the same building as the nurse, to book up my scan.

 

[Sarah1508]

Tbh I'm worried my two year old isn't eating as much as he should be for his age I've brought it up with my health visitor over and over for the past year and a bit and she's just like as long as he's a healthy weight which he is its nothing to worry about.. And just to give him whatever he will eat... But i don't know I just feel like we are setting him up for bad eating habits for life

 

[misspriss]

Tbh I'm worried my two year old isn't eating as much as he should be for his age I've brought it up with my health visitor over and over for the past year and a bit and she's just like as long as he's a healthy weight which he is its nothing to worry about.. And just to give him whatever he will eat... But i don't know I just feel like we are setting him up for bad eating habits for life

My 19 month old doesn't eat as much as he should for his age either. His ped isn't worried though as his weight has stayed in the same percentile steadily (although quite low). We still BF though, so he probably gets plenty of nutrients from there.

I think its a bit too young to worry about that maybe? But what do I know, I was a really picky eater (or so I thought until I met my husband, he is REALLY picky eater, I was just "selective"!)