The Bad Mothers (Guilt Free) Confessional Thread

[Luvmama]

I too dislike bf.dont feel that connection everyone else talks about either..I love her so much n im happy I can bf her but cant wait till its over.

 

[MrsVenn]

To previous posters, I too didn't like BF, it felt like a chore and I didn't like the dependency on just me.

Big confession..I LOVE working 4 days a week. I love my job, adult company, having a hot coffee, doing something meaningful etc, my job is important and what I do makes a difference to others without them realising, that makes me feel special somewhat. My mind gets a rest from 'Mum' things. I love my DD but I'm not the SAHM type, I worked my backside off to get where I have and I'd rather juggle work and her than give it all up. It's hard yes but I like this life a lot better than the 18months of Mat Leave I got where I was bored, miserable, lonely and felt like I didn't exist anymore.

 

[YellowGrey]

I feel guilty about hating to breastfeed. It seems that everyone else just LOVES to do it, it's so natural, so easy, doesn't hurt, blah blah blah. Am still doing it, am at eight weeks so far, but don't feel any magical connection with LO when doing it.
I also feel guilty about being jealous of DH when he gets to go to work and use his brain. Meanwhile, I'm using my two master's degrees to change diapers. Feel guilty that I'm thinking of getting a part time job for my.sanity.

I feel ya! I have a PhD and I'm currently a sahm. I feel lucky enough that we're able to financially afford for me stay at home, but guilty that I just want to go back to work.

Regarding bf'ing, I hated it at first too. It HURT!! It got easier with time for me, though. Now (my daughter is 6mo.), it's no big deal and probably easier and less hassle than bottle feeding.

 

[essie0828]

I have never let my daughter spend the night away from me and she is very rarely watched by anyone without me being there. I think I have trust issues

 

[Sams123]

I am currently guilty of sticking my 2 month old on her play gym and putting baby tv on the telly! I play with her all day but sometimes just need a break! It keeps her quiet and means I get some peace! Does thus make me a bad mum??? X

 

[AngelofTroy]

I just had a rant at a "pro breastfeeding" guy on facebook. Well he called himself pro breastfeeding but really he was just anti formula! Absolutely no thought for those of us who were advised to top up with formula because breast feeding wasn't working.

I thought I was over it and had forgiven myself but this MAN!!!! has brought back my pain. Really really stressed and angry! Grr

 

[essie0828]

I just had a rant at a "pro breastfeeding" guy on facebook. Well he called himself pro breastfeeding but really he was just anti formula! Absolutely no thought for those of us who were advised to top up with formula because breast feeding wasn't working.

I thought I was over it and had forgiven myself but this MAN!!!! has brought back my pain. Really really stressed and angry! Grr

You should have told him to try lactating. No man can understand unless they have been there with a tiny weak infant and boobs that don't do what you want them to. Don't feel bad. My DD has CP and was too weak to breast feed. Thank God for formula! Tell that man the next time he sees a woman struggling to BF, to offer himself up. After a few months of hormone injections, HE can BF the baby!

 

[essie0828]

I am currently guilty of sticking my 2 month old on her play gym and putting baby tv on the telly! I play with her all day but sometimes just need a break! It keeps her quiet and means I get some peace! Does thus make me a bad mum??? X

No mam! This doesn't make you a bad mum. You reached a safe compromise with your DD. She's happy, mom's happy, you did fine. You can always play extra when everyone feels better.

 

[Groovychick]

I am currently guilty of sticking my 2 month old on her play gym and putting baby tv on the telly! I play with her all day but sometimes just need a break! It keeps her quiet and means I get some peace! Does thus make me a bad mum??? X

Not at all. I had been 'entertaining' my little ones all morning and just wanted 10 minutes break. I too popped an educational programme on the TV just while I made a cup of tea. We all deserve a break and not feel guilty for it!

 

[baileybubs]

I feel so guilty at the moment because I dread day times with my dd! I love her so much but at the moment she is being so demanding and cranky that I am counting the hours until it's her bedtime, and I can't wait for days that I am working! I even have gone back to work early!

She is so amazing and I know that this phase is because of developmental leaps as she's just about on the verge of crawling, but she's refusing naps (currently crying in her cot), any indoor activity is only interesting for 5 mins before she starts yelling at me (this includes eating her food which she normally loves!), any outdoor activity we can manage for about 45 mins before she starts yelling and crying to either get out of the pram/car seat etc.

I find myself not wanting to be with her but then when I'm at work I miss her so much!!! Feel so bad for feeling this way but I can't stop feeling like this. Really hope this feeling goes away!

 

[kimberleyrobx]

I know this thread is meant to be guilt free, but i am feeling so damn guilty right now! I have to get this out and i have no other place to put it!

So this afternoon emily and nathan were in their bedroom playing together while OH and i were downstairs tidying up and 'chilling' afterwards. We had the baby monitor on and we could hear both of them laughing and talking away. Next minute nathan starts crying really loudly as if he'd been hurt and emily ran to her bedroom gate and started screaming for us (trying to shout for help) so OH casually goes upstairs thinking its probably just a bump on the head or something but when i shout up 'Is he alright?' He tells me he needs my help so of course I run upstairs to see what the fuss was about. Turns out emily had left one of her pennies on her bedroom floor and nathan was trying to eat it. OH told me it must have been lodged in his throat so he was choking and he also vomited afterwards, the poor souls face was all hot, red and bothered! OH kept telling me before to stop giving emily pennies (she loves being able to feel that she has money like everyone else and gives her pennies to the cashiers at the shops, usually keeps her pennies in her jacket pocket) but i kept telling him she is clever and is using her pennies responsibly. She usually keeps them in her jacket pocket or somewhere high, but she must not have seen the one on the floor and neither me or OH saw it either! So nathan ended up choking on one of her pennies... I feel terrible, and i think i will stop giving emily money
But i am proud of her because she saw her brother was in trouble and she immediately ran to her bedroom door and started shouting for us so at least i know she is looking out for her little brother xx

 

[flashy09]

I took my daughter to Sesame Street Live - bought the special "sunny seats" so she could meet the characters beforehand and Grandma came. Just as we walk into the place, I stop to put her down. We both had big puffy coats on and I had a diaper bag and my massive baby bump and I sort of plopped her down way too fast - she pitched straight forward onto the concrete floor and immediately came up with a big purple goose egg on her head. All our pictures with Elmo and Big Bird she is tear stained and has a big bruise and bump. Not to mention I was scared she had done more damage and spent the whole show trying to see her pupils and figure out if she was ok. I feel terrible!

 

[drudai]

I leave ds in his swing when he isn't crying/fussing and watch tv. I know I should be doing tummy time or playing with him but I still have lingering pnd and enjoy that he's an independent baby who is content to look at his mobile.

 

[rbourre]

My daughter fell down 3 stairs on the weekend. She was trying to follow me upstairs when I ran up for just a minute. She cried for 10 minutes and then got up and walked away and played. Not even a scratch on her, but I felt awful.

 

[Over_whelmed]

Holding baby on shoulder while opening package...she climbed right over my shoulder and fell to the floor! She seems fine now, not a mark on her...took her nap, had her feeding, filled her diaper, and now back t napping. But I'm still a nervous wreck. How do you get over this?

 

[Kellya009]

I love this thread haha. I really want to move my baby out of our bed into her crib but I am just too lazy lol. I would rather let her nurse all night than get up and down to settle her!

 

[Kellya009]

I feel guilty about hating to breastfeed. It seems that everyone else just LOVES to do it, it's so natural, so easy, doesn't hurt, blah blah blah. Am still doing it, am at eight weeks so far, but don't feel any magical connection with LO when doing it.
I also feel guilty about being jealous of DH when he gets to go to work and use his brain. Meanwhile, I'm using my two master's degrees to change diapers. Feel guilty that I'm thinking of getting a part time job for my.sanity.

Can I say, I hated BF until at least 4 months. It was hard and you feel like you have no freedom. Now it's tons easier and I enjoy it. Don't worry it doesn't suck for the whole time!!

 

[SusieRose]

This thread is ace!!!

We have done the not fastening the carseat as we both thought each other had done it.......

I was walking up he stairs with Jade in my arms, she was only about 2 weeks old. I tripped and had to put my hand out to save us, but she fell straight back and hit her head so hard on the stairs I ran the rest of the stairs crying and gave her to my Mum.

Paul was siting on the sofa playing with Alfie and lifting him above his head. He moved him backwards above his head straight into the wall, not gently either, I went mad

I left Jade out in the garden when she was 18 months old as she had a spider on her and I have a severe phobia........I had to get the courage to get rid otherwise I would have had to leave her there. So I actually took a full swinging kick and kicked it off of her shoulder. How I managed not to kick Jade is unreal, but I was very Thankful that I didn't, and that I got that thing off otherwise I would not have let her indoors.

I used to change Alfie's bum on the changing mat on top of our poufe, well we also used to leave him there whilst we turned to get the wipes and stuff, this particular day he had obviously learnt to move and went off the poufe backwards, landing on his head.

I once stood on and broke one of Pauls most collectable cars and blamed Jade when she was just 3yrs old

I must have loads, but I just can't think of them! x

The bit about the spider is one of the funniest things I have read!!!

 

[Teri7489]

I feel like such a bad mummy now! I took Isabella with me to the supermarket to get a little walk and fresh air. 5 minutes in to the walk it started pouring down and I had forgotten the rain covers! By the time we got there we were both soaked and I was grumpy. I grabbed a basket, filled it with what I needed. I then decided it would be best to get a brolley as I don't own one. I stupidly sat the basket on the handle bit of the pram and tipped the whole thing. Thank god she was in the car seat part which she gets strapped in to. I've never heard her squeal like that ever though!!! Feel so bad now my poor babykins!!

 

[lovemybubba]

I know this thread is meant to be guilt free, but i am feeling so damn guilty right now! I have to get this out and i have no other place to put it!

So this afternoon emily and nathan were in their bedroom playing together while OH and i were downstairs tidying up and 'chilling' afterwards. We had the baby monitor on and we could hear both of them laughing and talking away. Next minute nathan starts crying really loudly as if he'd been hurt and emily ran to her bedroom gate and started screaming for us (trying to shout for help) so OH casually goes upstairs thinking its probably just a bump on the head or something but when i shout up 'Is he alright?' He tells me he needs my help so of course I run upstairs to see what the fuss was about. Turns out emily had left one of her pennies on her bedroom floor and nathan was trying to eat it. OH told me it must have been lodged in his throat so he was choking and he also vomited afterwards, the poor souls face was all hot, red and bothered! OH kept telling me before to stop giving emily pennies (she loves being able to feel that she has money like everyone else and gives her pennies to the cashiers at the shops, usually keeps her pennies in her jacket pocket) but i kept telling him she is clever and is using her pennies responsibly. She usually keeps them in her jacket pocket or somewhere high, but she must not have seen the one on the floor and neither me or OH saw it either! So nathan ended up choking on one of her pennies... I feel terrible, and i think i will stop giving emily money
But i am proud of her because she saw her brother was in trouble and she immediately ran to her bedroom door and started shouting for us so at least i know she is looking out for her little brother xx

Wow! What a relief that your daughter knew to scream for help. Don't beat yourself up, these things happen. Don't stop her money because she may feel like she's being punished. how about buying her a little piggy bank and giving her money to put in there. that way no pennies will be accidentally left lying around. keep the piggy bank somewhere you can keep an eye on it so you know neither kids will be going in it and leaving money on the floor/choking on said money. x