The Loss of Breastfeeding - Guilt, Grief & Support Thread

[Kage76]

I heard somewhere the other day that Ff babies are supposed to be weaned earlier than BF babies? How true is this? Oh and with regards to overfeed babies, I'm terrified that DF overfed her the other day, she had 5 100ml bottles in an hour whilst I slept! I nearly went off, but she seemed fine

from what i have been told by the maternal health care nurses the official guidelines for weaning in Australia is 6 months- unless advised by a doctor.

I wouldn't worry about the bottles. She could be going through a growth spurt- if she was on the breast it would have been a cluster feed. Babies in my experience don't tend to eat for pleasure and will stop if its not needed.

 

[buddyIV]

I heard somewhere the other day that Ff babies are supposed to be weaned earlier than BF babies? How true is this? Oh and with regards to overfeed babies, I'm terrified that DF overfed her the other day, she had 5 100ml bottles in an hour whilst I slept! I nearly went off, but she seemed fine

from what i have been told by the maternal health care nurses the official guidelines for weaning in Australia is 6 months- unless advised by a doctor.

I wouldn't worry about the bottles. She could be going through a growth spurt- if she was on the breast it would have been a cluster feed. Babies in my experience don't tend to eat for pleasure and will stop if its not needed.

I was going to say the same thing. Some days you're just hungrier! (Like today, where I've already eaten my breakfast, a scone, 4 chocolates and about 5 cups of tea )

 

[sequeena]

I have never fed Thomas to a schedule. When we were in hospital the other day the nurses kept asking me if he was due a feed. I dunno, he'll let me know when he wants one!

 

[darkangel1981]

ive never enforced one but my Robert naturally fell into a pattern of 8/9am, 12/1pm, 5pm and 8/9pm

he seems to like it so i leave it that way.

 

[Eala]

As Roo got older she did fall into a pretty set routine of bottles herself. But I don't think we'd have found that natural routine if we'd enforced that whole "2 hours minimum!" between bottles thing

 

[prgirl_cesca]

I've had a bit of a slip today. I looked at the picture I have of me in the hospital of the only feed Luca ever had that seemed to go well. I'm lying on my side and he is lying into me and I look so serene and peaceful and in love. I remember feeling like it was the most natural and beautiful thing in the whole world and it was just us two. I am so resentful that it didn't stay that way.

I still can't believe I still feel like this nearly 10 months on.

 

[buddyIV]

prgirl_cesca

 

[vintage67]

I've had a bit of a slip today. I looked at the picture I have of me in the hospital of the only feed Luca ever had that seemed to go well. I'm lying on my side and he is lying into me and I look so serene and peaceful and in love. I remember feeling like it was the most natural and beautiful thing in the whole world and it was just us two. I am so resentful that it didn't stay that way.

I still can't believe I still feel like this nearly 10 months on.

I hate to say but the pain will probably never go completely way. I still feel it from my 7 year old and I sure as hell thought it would "work this time." One of the nurses in the hospital came into my room late one night and shared her story. Her daughter is now 3 and she is still a mess over it! She ended up on anti-depressants over it. Some of her co-workers had been less than understanding.

I'm not quite as devastated this time. I haven't driven down to the river and thought about driving in like last time. Probably because of my delightful, and extremely healthy 7 year son. Three antibiotics in 7 years! Two for strep picked up at school and one eyedrop for pink eye. Never had an ear infection. Loves me like crazy!

I know its hard, and it hits me like an avalanche some days.

 

[ChocolateKate]

I've had a bit of a slip today. I looked at the picture I have of me in the hospital of the only feed Luca ever had that seemed to go well. I'm lying on my side and he is lying into me and I look so serene and peaceful and in love. I remember feeling like it was the most natural and beautiful thing in the whole world and it was just us two. I am so resentful that it didn't stay that way.

I still can't believe I still feel like this nearly 10 months on.

Sending you HUGE hugs. Remember you are doing great and everything you've had to overcome. You have been a tower of strength to me and if I can be of any support to you, just shout. X

 

[prgirl_cesca]

Thank you everyone, particularly you Kate. I often worry that the abscesses were punishment for giving up so soon.

 

[ChocolateKate]

Thank you everyone, particularly you Kate. I often worry that the abscesses were punishment for giving up so soon.

You're welcome but know that this happened through NO fault of our own. Our abscesses were caused by blocked ducts and by incompetent medical professionals who failed to spot and treat the infection competently.

I've thought about investigating what I consider to be medical negligence (particularly how and where they tried to drain my abscess which has left me very scarred and unable to wear a bra) but this would just leave it hanging over me even longer. I HAVE to move on, I have to be positive. I have to look at how my daughter has thrived on formula and is loving every second of weaning. Every day is tough but every day also gets a little bit better and I'm confident that's the same for you too. Look at where we've come from hon! The doctors told me afterwards if I'd been left another hour, I'd have had a 50% chance of surviving septicaemia!

You are so strong and I know this is just a blip. Yes, what a beautiful image of you breastfeeding little Luca but do you give him less love with a bottle? No. Despite the hell you've been through medically, have you always been there for him giving him unconditional love despite being very very poorly? Yes. You are a terrific Mum and when he's old enough to understand, he will be in complete awe of everything you went through to give him the best possible start in life.

X

 

[BabyBoo36]

You are so strong and I know this is just a blip. Yes, what a beautiful image of you breastfeeding little Luca but do you give him less love with a bottle? No. Despite the hell you've been through medically, have you always been there for him giving him unconditional love despite being very very poorly? Yes. You are a terrific Mum and when he's old enough to understand, he will be in complete awe of everything you went through to give him the best possible start in life.

X

Beautiful quote and one we should all remember x

 

[prgirl_cesca]

Thank you

 

[MrsPOP]

You are so strong and I know this is just a blip. Yes, what a beautiful image of you breastfeeding little Luca but do you give him less love with a bottle? No. Despite the hell you've been through medically, have you always been there for him giving him unconditional love despite being very very poorly? Yes. You are a terrific Mum and when he's old enough to understand, he will be in complete awe of everything you went through to give him the best possible start in life.

X

Beautiful quote and one we should all remember x

Perhaps something blinkie-able?

 

[Kage76]

prgirl_cesca you have done NOTHING to deserve punishment. You tried your hardest- more than most would. I too have that 1 ideal breastfeed that i had before we left hospital and rather than look at it like as what it should have been like all the time- i've chosen to look at it like a gift. Its the one thing i hold on to, the place where i fell in love, like a first kiss. Honestly nothing has come close since then- but that's ok- I have that one memory and im so glad that I have it- because I think i would be more upset and more devastated that NONE of my attempts worked.

 

[queenlavera]

Just wanted to add I can't over feed my LO either, when he is done he puts on this very gentlemanly face, purses his lips, turns head to the side and links his fingers together on his chest. It cracks me up every time!!

 

[Snuffy]

Just wanted to add I can't over feed my LO either, when he is done he puts on this very gentlemanly face, purses his lips, turns head to the side and links his fingers together on his chest. It cracks me up every time!!

Mine screws his mouth up like a cat's bum

 

[BabyBoo36]

You are so strong and I know this is just a blip. Yes, what a beautiful image of you breastfeeding little Luca but do you give him less love with a bottle? No. Despite the hell you've been through medically, have you always been there for him giving him unconditional love despite being very very poorly? Yes. You are a terrific Mum and when he's old enough to understand, he will be in complete awe of everything you went through to give him the best possible start in life.

X

Beautiful quote and one we should all remember x

Perhaps something blinkie-able?

Oooh, I like it!!!

 

[fides]

I've had a bit of a slip today. I looked at the picture I have of me in the hospital of the only feed Luca ever had that seemed to go well. I'm lying on my side and he is lying into me and I look so serene and peaceful and in love. I remember feeling like it was the most natural and beautiful thing in the whole world and it was just us two. I am so resentful that it didn't stay that way.

I still can't believe I still feel like this nearly 10 months on.

 

[Snugggs]

Ladies! I THink i've found a blinkie

https://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b231/intricatenightmare/blinkies/baby/Tae.gif

what do you think? xxx