I am a ftm. Delivered via c-section on September 8, 2017 to my beautiful little girl, Aurora. And I was completely blind sighted.
I want to tell other soon-to-be ftm my 'experience' of the first 6 weeks 5 days with a newborn that I consider average, or so I've been led to believe.
I break it down into 2 week increments:
-week 0-2: tough because of sleep deprivation and recovering from surgery. Tough because of nursing sessions every 1-2 hours and figuring things out like car seats and how to turn off perpetual worry-wart mom brain (checking on baby every 2seconds). Crying spells and feeling sad/lonely/alone related to hormones every day to couple days. But a sleepy baby who is easy, content, and is put down for naps quickly and easily... except from 10pm-2am when baby inexplicably wakes up.
Weeks 2-4: "bliss". Starting to find our groove and starting to get a routine down. Nights are getting easier and she no longer is awake for hours on end. Clusterfeeding is less and baby is spacing her nursing sessions more. A 3 hour stretch of sleep at night on occasion! No more baby blues but still with a crying jag maybe once a week as a result of sleep deprivation. Baby is still easily put down to sleep but she is starting to get inconsistently cranky in the evenings.
Week 5: hell on wheels. Ouch. Baby goes through her first leap week and the days alternate from being completely off her rocker with fussiness and refusing to sleep and sleeping all day and night. Talk about at my wits end with frustration because of a baby who is super cranky. But after 5 days she 'wakes up' and is suddenly more alert and aware. Notice little milestones achieved. Thank goodness mil was visiting to help that week.... but with a more aware baby comes a more consistently cranky baby in the evenings. The witching hours are officially a constant companion in the evenings. Can last a few hours any time between 4pm and 11pm. Miss crankpot is her new nicknames.
Week 5.5-6.5: crankiness continues to increase. Toughest period yet with the new baby. She is calmest first thing in the morning but it all starts going slightly downhill after her first nap of the day ends around 10am. She gets more fussy as the day goes on. Doesn't know what she wants except to suck on the breast or binky for comfort. Usually has meltdowns in the evening when she won't sleep and can be awake for hours needing 100% attention/entertainment and a lot of soothing to go back to sleep. Nursing around 7-8pm is a nightmare. Overtired and fussy. She cries at the breast, pulls away, claws at it. Very ineffective nursing session. Momma sometimes cries too, feeling worn thin and frustrated. Doesn't know how to help baby and generally feeling helpless and out of control. Momma is desperate for some alone time in the evening sometimes. But baby simultaneously is fussiest around momma and is soothed best by momma. Momma feels almost betrayed. She can't sleep at night, not because of baby but because she is stressed, overworked, and frustrated. Baby is better at night and can sleep for 4 hour stretches.
No one has said ANYTHING about this part of the newborn phase. There was no warning. Everything online and in books gloss over the unrelenting fussiness around 6-8 weeks. It can be hell. I'm still waiting for the moment she smiles.
Don't get me wrong. I am so happy I have her in my life. She is so wonderful. But I won't pretend... the newborn phase sucks. It's a good thing we women have ocytocin to help us forget. And lots of newborn baby smell. And snuggles. Lots of adorable snuggles.
I figured I share this as it's something overlooked and not spoken of. Hopefully this thread will open conversation for new and veteran moms to share their experiences.
I want to tell other soon-to-be ftm my 'experience' of the first 6 weeks 5 days with a newborn that I consider average, or so I've been led to believe.
I break it down into 2 week increments:
-week 0-2: tough because of sleep deprivation and recovering from surgery. Tough because of nursing sessions every 1-2 hours and figuring things out like car seats and how to turn off perpetual worry-wart mom brain (checking on baby every 2seconds). Crying spells and feeling sad/lonely/alone related to hormones every day to couple days. But a sleepy baby who is easy, content, and is put down for naps quickly and easily... except from 10pm-2am when baby inexplicably wakes up.
Weeks 2-4: "bliss". Starting to find our groove and starting to get a routine down. Nights are getting easier and she no longer is awake for hours on end. Clusterfeeding is less and baby is spacing her nursing sessions more. A 3 hour stretch of sleep at night on occasion! No more baby blues but still with a crying jag maybe once a week as a result of sleep deprivation. Baby is still easily put down to sleep but she is starting to get inconsistently cranky in the evenings.
Week 5: hell on wheels. Ouch. Baby goes through her first leap week and the days alternate from being completely off her rocker with fussiness and refusing to sleep and sleeping all day and night. Talk about at my wits end with frustration because of a baby who is super cranky. But after 5 days she 'wakes up' and is suddenly more alert and aware. Notice little milestones achieved. Thank goodness mil was visiting to help that week.... but with a more aware baby comes a more consistently cranky baby in the evenings. The witching hours are officially a constant companion in the evenings. Can last a few hours any time between 4pm and 11pm. Miss crankpot is her new nicknames.
Week 5.5-6.5: crankiness continues to increase. Toughest period yet with the new baby. She is calmest first thing in the morning but it all starts going slightly downhill after her first nap of the day ends around 10am. She gets more fussy as the day goes on. Doesn't know what she wants except to suck on the breast or binky for comfort. Usually has meltdowns in the evening when she won't sleep and can be awake for hours needing 100% attention/entertainment and a lot of soothing to go back to sleep. Nursing around 7-8pm is a nightmare. Overtired and fussy. She cries at the breast, pulls away, claws at it. Very ineffective nursing session. Momma sometimes cries too, feeling worn thin and frustrated. Doesn't know how to help baby and generally feeling helpless and out of control. Momma is desperate for some alone time in the evening sometimes. But baby simultaneously is fussiest around momma and is soothed best by momma. Momma feels almost betrayed. She can't sleep at night, not because of baby but because she is stressed, overworked, and frustrated. Baby is better at night and can sleep for 4 hour stretches.
No one has said ANYTHING about this part of the newborn phase. There was no warning. Everything online and in books gloss over the unrelenting fussiness around 6-8 weeks. It can be hell. I'm still waiting for the moment she smiles.
Don't get me wrong. I am so happy I have her in my life. She is so wonderful. But I won't pretend... the newborn phase sucks. It's a good thing we women have ocytocin to help us forget. And lots of newborn baby smell. And snuggles. Lots of adorable snuggles.
I figured I share this as it's something overlooked and not spoken of. Hopefully this thread will open conversation for new and veteran moms to share their experiences.