The wrong thing to say to a TTCer! Tell us here ;-)

[MackMomma8]

My DH's Mum: No suprises yet, I'm not ready to be a grandmother.

Tough! I'm 29 and more than ready to be a Mammy and if I had my way I would be well on the way to that dream.

I'm sure she's just joking but even the opposite of putting pressure on is harsh.

WTH!? Your mother is so unfair! It's NOT UP TO HER! Goodness. What a selfish comment. I'm so sorry!

Yup yup, got this one from my mom, too. "I'm too young to be a grandma!"

Hmm. Shoulda told my baby brother that, too... BEFORE he got his 16 year old gf preggers. Oh, btw, they're expecting their SECOND at the end of summer. Sheesh.

 

[silmarien]

My DH's Mum: No suprises yet, I'm not ready to be a grandmother.

Tough! I'm 29 and more than ready to be a Mammy and if I had my way I would be well on the way to that dream.

I'm sure she's just joking but even the opposite of putting pressure on is harsh.

WTH!? Your mother is so unfair! It's NOT UP TO HER! Goodness. What a selfish comment. I'm so sorry!

Yup yup, got this one from my mom, too. "I'm too young to be a grandma!"

Hmm. Shoulda told my baby brother that, too... BEFORE he got his 16 year old gf preggers. Oh, btw, they're expecting their SECOND at the end of summer. Sheesh.

GAH! I hate that so many kids, KIDS, get preggers by accident, and we TTCers have so much difficulty! So unfair!

 

[pdxmamabear]

My DH's Mum: No suprises yet, I'm not ready to be a grandmother.

Tough! I'm 29 and more than ready to be a Mammy and if I had my way I would be well on the way to that dream.

I'm sure she's just joking but even the opposite of putting pressure on is harsh.

WTH!? Your mother is so unfair! It's NOT UP TO HER! Goodness. What a selfish comment. I'm so sorry!

Yup yup, got this one from my mom, too. "I'm too young to be a grandma!"

Hmm. Shoulda told my baby brother that, too... BEFORE he got his 16 year old gf preggers. Oh, btw, they're expecting their SECOND at the end of summer. Sheesh.

GAH! I hate that so many kids, KIDS, get preggers by accident, and we TTCers have so much difficulty! So unfair!

i agree but i also personally think that EVERy baby happens for a reason, and as we all know from TTC for a while it takes VERY specific circumstances to get a viable pregnancy.

 

[lemongrass]

Just had to add- I also had my period during our honeymoon, smack dab in the middle of it. Sucked big time!

 

[Coconuts]

Mackmomma, that sucks!!!!!!!!!! I find it hard enough with pregnant friends but to have pregnancies in the family and 'ooops' ones at that must be a big pill to swallow. Bah.

 

[motherofboys]

i agree but i also personally think that EVERy baby happens for a reason, and as we all know from TTC for a while it takes VERY specific circumstances to get a viable pregnancy.

I agree and although its something I'd hate for someone to tell me, I am a big believer in everything happening for a reason. The baby I am MEANT to have just is not ready yet, what ever the reason may be, and when I'm thinking positive I can see that. Every month is one month closer to the BFP. But when I'm feeling down about it, if someone had dared to say that to me I would not have been happy LOL

 

[pdxmamabear]

i agree but i also personally think that EVERy baby happens for a reason, and as we all know from TTC for a while it takes VERY specific circumstances to get a viable pregnancy.

I agree and although its something I'd hate for someone to tell me, I am a big believer in everything happening for a reason. The baby I am MEANT to have just is not ready yet, what ever the reason may be, and when I'm thinking positive I can see that. Every month is one month closer to the BFP. But when I'm feeling down about it, if someone had dared to say that to me I would not have been happy LOL

oh yeah i totally understand! i HATE hearing it too. but i try to look at the positive

 

[sweetmere]

"relax and it'll happen" - really? REALLY?? This one just irks me to no end.

"everything happens for a reason" - so you're saying I'm not MEANT to have a child? Thank you, I feel SO much better now!!

"if you stop trying it will happen" - yeah, you're right. If I stop having sex, we'll get pregnant just like Mary did with Jesus. Okay.

"you're young, you have all the time in the world" - if I'm having trouble NOW what makes you think it will be easier in 10 years!?

& pregnant friends who got pregnant on accident or 1st/2nd try who say things like "oh, pregnancy sucks"..."be glad you're not pregnant!!" or other things and KNOW you're having trouble TTC and obviously aren't happy about it. Or they rub their stomach allll day and look at you pointedly and talk about baby alllll day long. Really, I'm happy for you but you don't have to rub it in my face on purpose. Oh, and also had one friend who got pregnant 1st month tell me (and fully knows I'm TTC) that as soon as she has this one, they're going to try for another. Yeah, and I'm sure you'll have that one before me too.

 

[usmcwife.em]

Ugh. Just found out my aunt is pregnant with her 3rd. Her ex husband has her first 2 (both girls) due to her "issues". She has a history of drug use (narcotics, has been clean since November, but still in rehab) and has no job, no house (living in a group home for AA/NA), and no license or vehicle. I know that every baby is a blessing, but it's very frustrating to know her situation as well as her history and feel cheated. DH and I have been TTC for 4 1/2 yrs. Her daughters are 8 and 20 months. So to see her go through 2 pregnancies within the 4 yrs we've been trying is very difficult (she had a MC then a month later got pregnant with the 20 month old). I love those kids more than anything and of course I'll be thrilled to have another little one to spoil, but it still stings. Sorry, just needed to rant....

 

[beegray]

My DH Mom after I told her I saw my gyne on friday about long cycle: "Hope he didn't give you any of those fertility drugs! You could have twins!!!!" so not so horrible but was still kinda shocked... seriously? Yes i got my first prescription of Clomid to take next cycle and have been damned excited!!!!! If I have twins even better!!!!!! Been trying for two years and four months two babies would be a miracle ontop of a miracle!!!!

 

[mammag]

I have one!! "Oh, you can have MY fertility"

Yeah, f'ing Bitch.

 

[LoveCakes]

Loving this thread.

Strangely I hate the 'you'll be a great mum ones' It's a compliment but it stings since I don't know if I'll ever get to find out.

OH bumped into someone he went to school with recently who asked how long we'd been married and when told just over 2 years he said 'they say if you haven't had a baby after 2 years there's something wrong with you'. Hubby nearly smacked him in the face. We hadn't actually been trying that long but AF had just come one cycle after we were convinced we'd done it.

There have been a few babies in our families and we keep getting 'you'll be next' gee thanks for the heads up, do you have next weeks lottery numbers too?

 

[MackMomma8]

we keep getting 'you'll be next' gee thanks for the heads up, do you have next weeks lottery numbers too?

Oohhhhh I HATE this one. Really, because you can see the future? Why don't you tell me when and how I die, while you're at it.

 

[motherofboys]

At pre-school one of the Nans who occassionally picks up her grandson is always asking me "whens the next one?" "you not pregnant yet?" you would think seeing as her daughter has PCOS and also had lots of scarring and a blocked tube, some of it due to a sloppy job being done on her c-section and was TTC 3 years (she is now abotu 12 weeks pregnant with number 2) she would be a bit more sensitive, especially as she doesnt even know we are actually TTC just that I do want more babies 'one day'. She also keeps 'telling' me, that I need a girl, and I should have a girl. No I just want A baby.

 

[Coconuts]

we keep getting 'you'll be next' gee thanks for the heads up, do you have next weeks lottery numbers too?

Oohhhhh I HATE this one. Really, because you can see the future? Why don't you tell me when and how I die, while you're at it.

next weeks lottery numbers!!!! if I ever get that one, this is the reply - love it!

 

[coralym30]

oh how about ..


its okay you can have my kids

 

[motherofboys]

oh how about ..


its okay you can have my kids

My friend used to say (to others, not me) "oh you want a baby? take mine for a day, you wont want one by the time you bring her back"

 

[shradha]

My MIL keeps telling me go 2 the doctor n get cured....it's as if I m having sm problem....can't blame her coz she thinks that we r TTC for a long time......we ve just started TTC n this is my 3 rd month..... I can't explain this 2 her...

 

[LilMrs224]

Well yesterday my sister who is in college was talking to me about guys and venting about how she had her life planned wit her ex (they dated for almost 6 years) and how she was supposed to get engaged this year and married and next and then after a year start having kids. I told her i knew all about life not going as planned and she replies "I WANT BABIES" Mind you she KNOWS we are TTC and that we are having problems! So i told her I did TOO and that at least there wasn't nothing wrong with her and when she finds a guy and they get married she will have babies. Her reply was "Isn't it ironic that you have the husband and I have the ovaries?" I love my sister but sometimes I want to smack her !!

 

[sweetmere]

Today (well, I guess since it's almost 2am yesterday) I had all 3 of these things said to me:

1: from mean prego girl "I'll just give you your invitation in person since you can't go to my baby shower. You'll have to put it on your fridge since it has a picture of my bare baby belly on it" then smirked at me and rubbed her belly. uh. yeah okay.

2: some co-workers said they felt sorry for above girl who TRIED FOR ONE MONTH AND GOT PREGNANT and the day before she found out she was crying, saying she knew she'd never get pregnant, and they were like "I JUST FELT SO SORRY FOR HER POOR GIRL" um ok?? you felt sorry for her but i've been trying WAY LONGER and it's no biggie?? why say that in front of me??

3: same co-workers told me today that "everything happens for a reason" and "God has a reason for everything, there's a reason you're not getting pregnant and other people are" Okay what in the heck do you mean by that??? It went all over me WAY WORSE than the normal "everything happens for a reason". Today was obviously a HORRIBLE day for me and they just could not understand why I was not happy today.