Things I am so tired of hearing as a multiples mom

[~Brandy~]

I get so tired of going out shopping and hearing the most ridiculous questions and statements. Yes I knew they were coming from reading on here but I have to vent...

Are they identical? Do they look the same to you!! OMG one is 3lbs more than the other one and completely different looking.

Are they boy/girl twins? THEY COULDNT HAVE ONE MORE PIECE OF PINK ON THEM!! I intentionally drape them in the most hideous pink colors so people dont ask this.. but they still do. I am about to put a sign on their stroller.

My all time favorite that makes me turn around and walk off without a response... "I have a 22 month old and I just found out I am pregnant so it's just like having twins" " I had my children 3 years apart so it was just like having twins" ITS NOTHING LIKE HAVING TWINS PEOPLE!!

Ok I am done sorry.

 

[SucreK]

Yeah, the "my kids are 13 months apart, so I pretty much have twins" thing makes me want to wallop the commenter. And then laugh maniaclly. And then drink.

I also keep getting bizarre comments from an aquaintance who has two boys, 2 years old and 4 years old. She's said things like, "Oh, it's SO HARD having two in diapers!" But not in a "you know what I mean?" way. No, she says it LIKE I DON'T KNOW THAT. Like, WTF? I honestly get the feeling that since it was one pregnancy, I somehow don't count as a mom of two kids. So weird.

Oh, and I had a woman come up to me while pushing the girls in the stroller, stare admiringly at them, and then ask me, "Why are they wearing pink?" Um...

 

[greeneyes0279]

Oh, I feel ya! Here's the comments I get..........Look its double trouble, oh GOOD LUCK (sarcastic tone), oh wow, you have your hands full. I have boy/girl twins and dress them in blue and pink and my lil girl has her ears pierced and I still get asked what gender they are. Them number 1 question I get is "are they twins?" It's totally obvious that they are the same age. They are the same size. Its annoying to get all these comments and questions. Happens every time we go out in public.

 

[Pinkie 33]

I'll look forward to all this when they arrive! For me at the moment, my biggest beef is when people ask if it runs in the family. When I answer no, they look shocked and go on to say what a surprise it must have been at the scan etc etc. 1 in 7 couples struggle to conceive with a large proportion or twin pregnancies being the result. Its not uncommon. Why don't people think before they speak and rattle on making uncomfortable conversation. Use some common sense.

My other issue is people constantly telling me how tired I'll be, how much hard work it will be, how I'll struggle with this that and the other. I DO realise all of this without having it pointed out

And finally... why do people feel the need to tell you that their brothers wifes best friend sister blah blah had twins and the birth was horrendous and they were in hospital forever etc etc. How do people think these sorts of stories are helpful to someone weeks off giving birth.

Rant over X

 

[xxshellsxx]

And finally... why do people feel the need to tell you that their brothers wifes best friend sister blah blah had twins and the birth was horrendous and they were in hospital forever etc etc. How do people think these sorts of stories are helpful to someone weeks off giving birth.

Rant over X

^^^^^^ drives me crazy! Everyone seems to have a horror story to tell me when i say it's twins! Now when they start the sentence with 'Oh my friends sister, when she had her twins....' I say 'Oh great ANOTHER twin horror story... go on tell me more...' and they usually shut up! lol x

I have to confess on the 'double trouble' statement... i call my two my double trouble and they are not even here yet! lol x

 

[greeneyes0279]

I'll look forward to all this when they arrive! For me at the moment, my biggest beef is when people ask if it runs in the family. When I answer no, they look shocked and go on to say what a surprise it must have been at the scan etc etc. 1 in 7 couples struggle to conceive with a large proportion or twin pregnancies being the result. Its not uncommon. Why don't people think before they speak and rattle on making uncomfortable conversation. Use some common sense.

My other issue is people constantly telling me how tired I'll be, how much hard work it will be, how I'll struggle with this that and the other. I DO realise all of this without having it pointed out

And finally... why do people feel the need to tell you that their brothers wifes best friend sister blah blah had twins and the birth was horrendous and they were in hospital forever etc etc. How do people think these sorts of stories are helpful to someone weeks off giving birth.

Rant over X

I got those same comments and questions when I was preggo. People really don't think before speaking. I still get the question "Do twins run in the family?" I don't think that one will ever stop being asked.

 

[~Brandy~]

Oh I forgot the sarcastic witch at Costco that said Omg you have 2? I'm so sorry.


I almost decked her after saying no I'm seriously blessed but I feel sorry for you

 

[Jac.]

I get all the time "Do twins run in your family?" "How are you feeling" ( a general pregnancy question but still irritates me) and since I have a daughter that will be just shy of 2 years old, I always say how busy I will be before anyone has the chance to say it first. Haha. I'm due anytime now and I can't even imagine how hectic this will be. When people first find out I think they think I'm crazy...as though I planned this. Haha.

 

[skyesmom]

not pregnant atm, but these horror stories that get bashed at you as soon as you say you are expecting are just ridiculous!! i don't know what people mean to do with them, as if hearing that someone tore from A to B could be of any help! i think with twins it's even worse.

i remember when OH and i announced our last pregnancy (ended up in a loss sadly), one of his friends said to me: Oh my god! do you know what you will have to push out of your body??? don't you know some women poop during labor???

this was his FIRST reaction. the congratulations came after the poop.

i laughed my ass off back then as he looked so much in horror from the thought of pooping himself in public, that i just brushed it off saying: I'll think of that when i'll be pushing 8 pounds of flesh out of my vayaya.

BUT. in another circumstance (we were way too overjoyed back then to bother really), i'd be ehm... why the hell do you care of what may come out of my ass???

 

[cherrylips100]

Oh there are so many, some days I want to hand out leaflets so I don't have to answer any questions.
Ooh you've got your hands full! You wait til they're running around! Double trouble! Which one's the naughty/dominant one? That must have been a shock! But the most annoying of all is family and friends playing the guess who game everytime we see them.

On the plus side though, twins are awesome and you twin mummas to be will love it.

 

[Twayzeekrissy]

Oh my goodness! What is wrong with people.... second thought... look what I have to look forward to. :S

So far I have had so many people basically tell me there's no way I will be able to deliver naturally. That is easier to have a c section.... Ugh yea all you crazys giving this advice are speaking from zero experience. I feel bad for any mom having to have a c section then care for 1 or more babies. It's aweful ! I would much rather a couple days of pain and uncomfortableness than the 8 weeks of pain I went through having my first. C sections suck regardless or planned or emergencu. Stop telling me your horror labour story like it will chance my mind. Gr!!

 

[~Brandy~]

Oh my goodness! What is wrong with people.... second thought... look what I have to look forward to. :S

So far I have had so many people basically tell me there's no way I will be able to deliver naturally. That is easier to have a c section.... Ugh yea all you crazys giving this advice are speaking from zero experience. I feel bad for any mom having to have a c section then care for 1 or more babies. It's aweful ! I would much rather a couple days of pain and uncomfortableness than the 8 weeks of pain I went through having my first. C sections suck regardless or planned or emergencu. Stop telling me your horror labour story like it will chance my mind. Gr!!

I delivered naturally with 3 pushes for the first and 2 pushes for the second! Dont listen to those people sheesh.. Not like you were in the first place.

Labor to both babies in my arms less than 3 hours.

 

[MissyLissy]

My twins aren't here yet... But omg if 98% of people haven't asked me if twins run in my family. It's maddening! Like every single person. And they all ask like their question is so original! Technically twins DO run in my family (my dad's sisters are twins) so that's my fallback response. But my twins are the result of follistim injections to make me ovulate + IUI due to PCOS. Obviously I'm not getting into that with every Tom, Dick and Harry.

I've also gotten the horror stories, the "you are in trouble" responses, and lots of "omg, were you shocked to find out it was twins???" (Real answer: Kind of, but not THAT shocked. Due to my heavy monitoring I knew I ovulated two eggs the month that worked and my HCG was high from the get-go. Should I get into that with every nosey nelly?)

The stupidest one I get is are your twins identical even after I tell people it's a boy and a girl. Like seriously? Stop and think people. One has a penis, and the other a vagina. That fact alone disqualifies them from being identical. Stupid.

 

[Twayzeekrissy]

Oh my goodness! What is wrong with people.... second thought... look what I have to look forward to. :S

So far I have had so many people basically tell me there's no way I will be able to deliver naturally. That is easier to have a c section.... Ugh yea all you crazys giving this advice are speaking from zero experience. I feel bad for any mom having to have a c section then care for 1 or more babies. It's aweful ! I would much rather a couple days of pain and uncomfortableness than the 8 weeks of pain I went through having my first. C sections suck regardless or planned or emergencu. Stop telling me your horror labour story like it will chance my mind. Gr!!

I delivered naturally with 3 pushes for the first and 2 pushes for the second! Dont listen to those people sheesh.. Not like you were in the first place.

Labor to both babies in my arms less than 3 hours.

That sounds perfect!! I hope my delivery goes as smoothly as yours! Thankyou for sharing this! Nice to hear some positive about delivery

 

[MommyGrim]

I once had a woman approach me while me and OH were getting our cell phones renewed and the twins were in their carseats. She asked if they were twins When I say yes, she points to a girl behind her, who was about 15, and says "She was a twin. But my son only lived a couple hours, he was born without a brain." Like, why would you tell me that?? I felt horrible and said I was sorry but it just made the whole experience horrible and awkward.

 

[AngelUK]

lol this thread made me laugh! My twins are 2.5 years old and I still get the stupid questions. But since Dominic is slightly bigger and taller than Sebastian they usually ask me what the age difference is. When I say 2 minutes they say "Ooooh they are twins!?" Well really?! Do they look like there is 10+ months (at least) between them?! I also got the identical question. Sebastian's hair is slightly wavy and Dominic's has the tightest little Shirley Temple curls imaginable. But "Are they identical?" Me: " No, they don't look the same do they?" Her: "No, not to me, but you can never tell" Ermmmm yes actually!
When I anounced that we were having twins one person told me that that was her worst nightmare. Right, not that one or both your babies got ill or died...
And as for the double trouble thing, I always answered "No! Double Blessing!" In fact it was the title of my journal on here
One of the admins here had a nice signature that read: If you think my hands are full, you should see my heart. I love that. And if I get the hands full comment, I will use that answer.

 

[MommyGrim]

Another thing I keep getting asked, by strangers and friends/family, is "Which one is more advanced?" "Which one is smarter?" Both of them are smart and while one may have walked first the other talked first. I dont compare my kids to each other.

 

[cherrylips100]

Oh yes I get the comparing thing too. Especially about my 'chunky' twin, he is only about 5oz bigger and both are the size of a 7 month old. I think people just enjoy playing spot the difference.

 

[mowat]

Oh my goodness, all these comments to look forward to!

 

[fides]

the runs in your family Q doesn't bother me - i think that's just a standard question people ask - kind of like when is your due date or how far along are you - i think people are just curious, even if it is odd when you think about it - how many weeks is the same as asking when you had sex. people also ask questions about nursing - i don't think for the most part they're meaning to be intrusive about your bodily functions - just curious, even if it is super annoying. that's just me, though

And finally... why do people feel the need to tell you that their brothers wifes best friend sister blah blah had twins and the birth was horrendous and they were in hospital forever etc etc. How do people think these sorts of stories are helpful to someone weeks off giving birth.

i know!!! not to mention the depressing stories when a twin didn't make it - yes, that's sad, but i reeeeealllly don't need to know that right now, thanks

When I anounced that we were having twins one person told me that that was her worst nightmare. Right, not that one or both your babies got ill or died...

lol - i've gotten that comment too!!!

one lady told me, wow, 2 toddlers plus twins - that's worse than my having 9 kids! worse? what do you mean worse, because i feel lucky, like i won the lottery!

Oh my goodness, all these comments to look forward to!

ha ha - yeah - kinda makes me glad that there's no way i'll be able to get out and about with all 4 of my kids for several months at least. DH and i are planning to split the kids when we go out as a family - each with one twin and a toddler - just to avoid the stupid questions.