TIE WELCOME JACK, HENRY, DEVON, ROXAS, PENELOPE, MATILDA, THEO and Charlotte!!

[mammag]

Fancy letters for my vagina and inner thighs feel like they are constantly in a vice grip. Something about when your pelvis spreads for pregnancy, one side spreads further or in a different direction, causing inflammation and pain.

 

[Jess19]

oh lol ok

 

[MrsStutler]

Wohoo you got your cross hairs Kayla!!!

I was really, really surprised at the temp jump. I actually had a total hissy fit on the 3rd day because I thought my thermometer had gone missing and I wasn't going to get my crosshairs without a proper temp. Turns out it just got knocked off my nightstand. I'm still not feeling it this cycle though, way late O seems to get me a super short LP and I've been crampy all day. I have a huge, super important test Tuesday so I've got lots to distract me. I've been crazy emotional though, bouncing high and low like crazy. Not particularly helpful for studying or TTC. Lots of praying and hoping though, only time will tell.

 

[Jess19]

Keeping everything crossed for you!


When will you start testing?!

 

[MrsStutler]

Keeping everything crossed for you!


When will you start testing?!

I'm trying to wait until at least 9dpo but no promises. the last few temps just being a bit above coverline are concerning me. Usually they are a bit higher but this cycle chart is looking very different compared to months previous. My OB was able to move my appointment up a bit to the 23rd instead of the 30th, so that's good.

 

[Jess19]

Yey for a week earlier appointment hope everything goes good

 

[Jess19]

So I have been dealing with something lately and I just dont know who to talk to, figured you ladies might be a good start, although I think I might need to go talk to someone professional about it too. idk

I have been having a hard time deciding if I want to get my tubes tied, during the c section.
Part of me wants to because honestly we can not do another kid. This Lo will make 4 and we just cant afford another and idk where I would put another kid if we had one we are running out of room here lol
And I am happy and feel truely blessed with the beautiful family that God has blessed me with. Some women pray every day for it. I am happy that I have had the opportunity to be a mother to these beautiful children.
But another part of me is having a really hard time coming to terms with this being my last baby/child and that my child bearing years are over I dont think im ready to accept it. Honestly I dont know if I ever will be. Its an era of my life that is ending.
Ugh I dont even want to think about it right now. But it just makes sense to have my tubes tied while im already cut open on the operating table instead of scheduling a separate surgery in the future
I have never dealt with post partum depression but I have a feeling I will this time. And that scares me too.
Im trying to cherish every moment of this pregnancy but everytime I think about it I want to cry.
IDK what to do, im torn and heart broken and the worst part is DH doesnt fully understand, hes doing a great job trying to but its hard for him, its a woman thing.
And I dont feel like I can talk to my mother because I just dont think she understands. She left us when we were young and she doesnt like to take her grandkids, ever. Its like pulling teeth I dont see how a mother that can leave her kids can understand where im at. I think she likes having her kids grown so she can run around and do her own thing, she acts like shes 21 sometimes. And my sister is the same way I fee like im the "odd man out" in my family.
I just need some advice, im sorry for the long post. Im starting to freak out as I only have 4 weeks to make this decision

 

[waiting2c]

Whilst it does make sense to do it all at the same time if you are not emotionally ready to make this decision I would leave it. Your body and emotions go through the wringer enough just having a baby. It is a real hard one - could your oh have a vasectomy later on? I just think if you are so emotional about it and worry about ppd then it's not worth it. When you feel like you are on a deadline to make a decision then it can be the hardest one you ever have to make!!

My oh doesn't want anymore after this one - I too am not ready to agree as I don't want that part of my life to be over despite the fact that my anxiety levels this pregnancy are through the roof and I am just plain scared all the time. We are complex creatures woman lol!!

 

[Jess19]

Yeah we have talked about having him "snipped"
it just makes more sense, financially too, to have me do it instead of him. In the long run it would cost more money, for the surgery and for his time off of work, hes the only income we have.
I totally agree though, if im not 100% and feel like this than I shouldnt have it done. I mentioned it to my dr at my last appointment and he said he wouldnt do it if he knows im not 100%

 

[waiting2c]

Don't put too much pressure on yourself to make a decision, money isn't everything whilst it's hard to live without and can be the cause of so much stress. Maybe with the breathing room to make a decision with the knowledge you don't have to do this if you really don't want to will help you get a clearer picture

Kayla - so glad your appt has been moved up, less days to count down now!! I really hope you can get some answers and get things back on track!!

 

[MrsStutler]

Oh man Jess. That's a question that's almost impossible to answer. Honestly, if you're not 100% then don't do it. Take the time to really process it when your emotions aren't all nutty from baby. I know I can never get my tubes tied or have hubs get snipped. Mentally I know I cannot handle knowing that the possibility of having another child was not there. I would seriously break down. Even if I knew for sure I didn't want another baby, I would not do it. I'm already freaking out that this potential third baby could be my last (hubs is not buying my 4 kids sales pitch). So listen to your heart and the rest will fall into place. You never know what the future can hold for you. If you decide later on to have either of you done, it's at least something you thought a lot about and weren't under the influence of pregnancy hormones!

 

[Jess19]

Thanks
At least me nursing will act as birth control for the first year, and then i can attempts some other type of birth control after lol im bad a remembering to take the pill.
I dont think im going to have it done, i cant deal with this now. I made a lunch date with my best friend to talk about it. We have been friends for almost 17 years, shes basically my sister. Shes kinda in the same boat, as her dr recomended her not to have more children, she almost bleed to death with her two pregnancies they dont want her to risk a 3rd. I think we could really support each other right now sometimes I wonder if it bothers her watching me be pregnant again?

You think pitching a 4th kid is hard lol try for a 5th! Lol my dh wont hear any of it. Although i did pull the "we could try again for a boy" card but after 3 girls i think he believes it will never happen for him.

 

[MrsStutler]

Have you thought about an IUD? I am thinking of doing the paraguard after our third. Long-term, no hormones, pretty low risk, and most insurances pay a good portion of it. I don't remember to take pills worth a damn and my body is so hormone sensitive it's crazy. I turned into a nutbar when I was on Yaz.

My emotions are crazy heightened today. I went into Starbucks this morning and it was packed. For some crazy reason this made me get all emotional and I had to fight really hard to not cry.

 

[waiting2c]

Have everything crossed for you Kayla that this is your month and you don't need that appt!!!!

 

[MrsStutler]

Have everything crossed for you Kayla that this is your month and you don't need that appt!!!!

I'm hoping it will be a very different appointment.

School has not been going very well and I'm under an intense amount of stress so I'm sure that's not helping my issues one bit. I'm in serious danger of failing out of my last semester. I've broken out in stress hives all over my body and I've developed a nice cold sore thanks to all of this. I just hope for a miracle and a passing grade. I have a 77.33 on my exams overall and I need an 80 to pass. We have three more exams to go so I have to get 85 or better on each of them to pass. No stress or anything.

 

[waiting2c]

Ouch that does sound very stressful!!! You certainly have a lot on your plate at the moment, hope you pass next exams with flying colours and can de stress a bit!!

 

[MrsStutler]

Nothing this morning, but I'm still trying to be optimistic.

 

[MrsStutler]

Another BFN this morning, I thought if I were pregnant it would have shown up by now. Still hoping it's just a late implantation or something but I'm working on accepting this wasn't our month either.

 

[Jess19]

Aww Kayla im sorry things have been crap for you lately hope everything starts to look up soon

 

[waiting2c]

Sorry to hear bfn Kayla - not too long now till your appt. hopefully cute can then get some answers