Trying to conceive #1 Buddies!

[psychochick]

abennion: I'd say that looks about right. In fact, I might say even the day before could be O as well. My chart's wacky this month too. Kind of reminded me of yours

supergongjoo: Ooo your mom's Chinese eh? I'm from China too. I'm actually kind of glad my mom isn't busting out any weird herbal stuff yet. I'm taking enough supplements as it is. In fact my mom's kind of chill about it surprisingly. She just said I should keep my hands and feet warm. Only eat/drink warm stuff etc. Very asian stuff imo. She's been telling me that for years but now I actually kind of pay attention hehe

Also supergongjoo and magic: sorry about AF. I would be crushed too if I got my hopes up only to be dashed. So far my body's been pretty timely with AF, I guess that's one thing I could be thankful for.

I hope everyone had a good weekend. I got dinner with my girlfriends, two of them are approaching 3rd trimester. It's funny because I kind of felt like they were jealous of how much "fun" I've been having on weekend getaways and stuff, whereas I was kind of jealous that they have healthy pregnancies. Guess we can't have everything.

 

[Trr]

My pregnant friend says she is jealous that I'm having a glass of wine every night since my chemical. I'm jealous she has a baby boy in her tummy when we started trying the same month. Was hoping to be pregnant together. Going on to cycle 5 now.

Our time will come, I guess.

 

[lesondemavie]

Still a bfn this am and getting some of my usual pre-AF cramping. Not out entirely yet, but will probably be joining trr on cycle 5 soon. Trying to push the "what if we just can't" thought out and focus on a positive. I'll have 2 fertile windows in December, so two more chances before the end of the year.

@super: My sister is studying to be a licensed acupuncturist...she keeps telling me about Chinese herbs and how great acupuncture is. Hope it helps! My sister is actually the only one in my family who knows we're trying. I love my mom to death, but if I told her, my grams, my aunts and uncles, and all 30 of my cousins would know. Eek!

 

[supergongjoo]

@psycho Yes my mom is chinese and pretty into herbal everything. I figured ive been on maca, black cohosh, raspberry, prenatals, mucinex, and everything else. Im pretty much down for anything that might work at this point.
Yea i hear you on the whole grass is greener. But i can do without alcohol for awhile and feel like i would have just as much fun with a bean ( My DH is a very accomodating fun loving guy) so i always get a little annoyed when my preggo friends make comments like that.

@Leson I tried acupuncture a few times. and i love what it does for my aches.
I started off telling no one just cause we wanted it to be a surprise, and then cause i was embarrassed it was taking so long. At this point i just wanted all the support and help i could get without having to tell a bunch of people and my mom was my best choice lol. Shes jumped at the chance to " go to the mountains" and do all sorts of very traditional remedy things. So we will see.

Does anyone feel a little embarrassed it taking this long? I dont know if its cause ive always been able to see results with hard work or its a biological thing but i dont think ill tell people how long it took even after it happens.

 

[Earthylove]

Hugs leson and trr our time will come!
I have to remind myself that everyone's journey is different. Our friend's journeys are different from ours. We all have our challenges, setbacks and triumphs and they all look different for each person. No one knows the future, but with each new cycle there's a new chance!

 

[psychochick]

Earthy: love the positive attitude. I think the same way too. I dunno if I had mentioned before, but my parents always got pregnant very easily with both me and my brother. My mom got pregnant first try at 39 with my brother! But if I think about my parents life in general, they've had so much other struggles compared to me. It's only fair that they not have even more problems with TTC.

super and leson: I get the "what if there is a problem?" thought almost every cycle when AF shows. But I don't know if you guys have seen this chart:
https://www.fertilityfriend.com/Faqs/Chart-Gallery-Stats-Months-TTC-versus-Age.html

if the link doesn't work basically the chart shows months TTC vs age on fertilityfriend. It shows that 30-35 (the window I'm in) average is 7-9. Even 25-30 the average is about 6-7 mo. and this chart is published last year. I could definitely see this data being a little skewed because those that always get pregnant first try, they'd probably never use fertilityfriend, but obviously we're not in that bucket of women anyways. So again, the AVERAGE is 6-9 months. That means as many people as there are getting it even 2-5 months, there are just as many people getting it 10-13.

I think we only hear about the first time people because it's unusual. If it's usual, then you'd only hear about people that took longer.

AFM 8DPO today, but not really feeling much. Might POAS at 10DPO on Thursday.

 

[beemeck]

hi girls!!

I've been so so busy lately. work is nuts! It's all very nice distractions but I miss you all and want to be keeping up better!

At my massage last week, my masseuse highly recommended acupuncture for fertility. It wasn't a sales pitch either as they don't have it at that salon. Their website looks awesome and they have a lot about fertility assistance so I am going to try it next month if this isn't it for me. super - have you had it done for fertility help?

I definitely am loving these chinese herbal tips! I always want to sway toward natural remedies as opposed to meds. I work with refugee families and have a lot of natural turkish/iraqi tips to try. The women are really pushing for for me to boil an onion every day - drain the water and drink it like tea - for 15 days in a row, take a week off, then boil dried figs and drink that water for 5 days in a row. They say it works wonders lol - I'll try almost anything!

I do know what you mean about the "embarrassing" aspect. isn't' that so odd? There really isn't any embarrassing about it at all but I do know what you mean. It's almost like - how good of a woman are you? I hate it. I guess my situation is a little different because I got pregnant on the first try and believe that I'm not getting pregnant again because of the traumatic pregnancy I had, but I still feel it in a different sense. Like why did my body let the egg implant in my cervix? What's wrong with my uterus? so I totally get it. Unfortunately everyone knows about my situation with trying (and failing). I was hospitalized for awhile with my last pregnancy and off work for about a month so it was pretty well known what went on. Everyone knew we were pregnant and had tried to be, so I assume everyone knows that we are still trying again. It is frustrating everytime I get together with friends and order a glass of wine they say omg I thought you were gonna tell us you are pregnant! I wish

I think I am 1 DPO toady but not sure yet. Will see what temps do. O pain was horrible yesterday but still there today just a little dulled. dtd every other day like clockwork this month and didn't stray from it so I'm glad about that. I'll try to catch up more on everyone else! xoxo

 

[lesondemavie]

@super: I definitely can relate to that feeling of embarrassment, and then I feel silly because it's just been 4 cycles now for me...so then I feel this mix of fear, disappointment, embarrassment, and silliness...it's very confusing! I figure the longer things go on, the more people will find out/know/be told. I'm really awful at keeping secrets. I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, right? My brother point blank asked me on the phone today...so he knows now. He just married in October and his new wife went off bcp this month...sounds like they'll be ntnp for a bit to start.

@Earthy: It's so true that we all have our own journeys and challenges in life. My best friend went through 2 years and 3 hospitalizations coming off of a medication she was on just so she could even try to have a baby. Thankfully, when she could finally try, she had no problems ttc. It just took her two months, and she had the most perfect pregnancy ever. Her little boy is 6 months now and I just love that little guy to pieces!

@psycho: That actually does help a ton. I still have that "it takes the average couple 3-4 months" stuck in my head, which I then take to mean we're not average. I've always been above average, so this is just making no sense at all to me . I guess I'm comparing myself to all the 20 somethings my husband's friends married. I'm like a fish out of water in that group. He's the only one who chose an older women (by 1 year haha). Speaking of, they carded me and not him this weekend! Pretty sure it was the combo of the freckles and having my hair in a braid...but I'll take it . Best of luck to you as you near testing time!

@bee: I hope work is busy but rewarding of late! My 18 yo client broke the window at her dad's place this am, so I was dealing with that and all of the crazy Thanksgiving schedules most of today. I'm sorry your friends do that to you when you order wine...I'm sure you know they mean well. It's nice that your friends want the best for you, but I also hope a few of them just listen and let you be sad or angry or whatever you need to be at the time. You do that for everyone else all day, you deserve that glass of wine girl!

Speaking of wine...looks like I will in fact be enjoying my father-in-law's homemade version over the holidays. Spotting this evening...AF should be full force tomorrow. Testing is done for me. Onward to cycle 5!

 

[supergongjoo]

@psycho That chart weirdly makes me feel tons better. Thanks.
When is AF due?

@beemeck i did visit an acupuncturist for fertility and he gave me a few herbs to drink as well. But i didnt feel like he was helping much., though i only went twice.(He wasnt my regular acupuncturist, my regular guy specializes in pain management. ) I was thinking about trying again with a different acupuncturist just haven gotten a chance to research a better one.
BTW now im researching the onion thing.. lol im pretty open to anything
@leson i LOVE when i get carded. its such a silly thing but it always makes me smile
And that morning... I think you also deserve that glass of wine

AFM my fertile window is around the corner. I bought some ground maca instead of replenishing with the capsules. i have been mixing it with our morning smoothie. and.. oh.my.goodness! There is such a HUGE difference! I have TONS of energy almost as if i had a full cup of coffee. ( i quit coffee a while ago) And DH? well hes been a bd machine! I'm not sure if it is just a potent quality or what. But same number of mg and a HUGE difference.

 

[abennion]

@bee: I just signed up for my first appointment for fertility acupuncture last night. My appointment is next week, during AF. I'm actually pretty excited for it.

@super: Is the maca just supposed to help with libido? Where did you get your stuff from?

AFM: Preseed should also be delivered today! I feel like Next cycle we're really going to be prepared. I'm only going to use the OPKs I have left, once I'm out, I'm out; that way DH doesn't have to feel pressure to perform. Since I'm most likely out this month we'll be hoping for a Christmas surprise.

 

[psychochick]

leson: oh lots of marriages now are younger men with older women, plus 1 year difference is so little at our age. I actually don't know many where the women are much younger than the men. I totally get carded all the time, I'm so used to it. In fact, even DH looks young. Once we had an army recruiter come to our door, DH opened it and the guy said: "are your mommy and daddy home?" DH said, "nope" and the guy went away! LOL DH was already 32!!

super: I've heard great things about maca. Is this red maca or black maca? I think the added energy would be awesome even without the fertility benefits.

beemeck: It's funny I'm actually really not into herbs or acupuncture because I grew up with my parents always making a big deal about eastern medicine. Course now I'm more open to it just cuz I'm more open to anything hahaha. It's a somewhat inexact science so it definitely depends a lot on the practitioners and how deeply they understand your situation and the practice. So definitely try to find a good acupuncturist. Also TWW for you woohoo!

Tested yesterday 9DPO pretty sure it was BFN even though I thought i could see a faint shadow. Starting to get line eye I'll test again on saturday 12DPO, and then AF will be monday!

 

[Earthylove]

Hi ladies! I'm 9dpo today. Temps decreased a little yesterday and was the same today, but still above cover line. It's weird because the day it decreased, I started feeling tender breasts which I thought would mean higher levels of progesterone not sure what's going on there. Tomorrow I have to be up earlier than usual so I'll see what my temp is like then. If it continues to decrease, then AF is most likely on her way. Last month I tested at 9 dpo but not this cycle! I'm thinking I'll only test the day AF is due.

 

[psychochick]

Hi ladies! I'm 9dpo today. Temps decreased a little yesterday and was the same today, but still above cover line. It's weird because the day it decreased, I started feeling tender breasts which I thought would mean higher levels of progesterone not sure what's going on there. Tomorrow I have to be up earlier than usual so I'll see what my temp is like then. If it continues to decrease, then AF is most likely on her way. Last month I tested at 9 dpo but not this cycle! I'm thinking I'll only test the day AF is due.

That happens to me all the time, I actually think it's an increase in estrogen, which can also cause breast tenderness apparently. My temp also dropped from a couple of days ago but my breasts are killing me. Usually doesn't mean anything until like 12-13DPO, by THEN if temp drops then AF is def coming. Hehehe let's see what happens this weekend, you're right behind me, I'm 10DPO today. FX

 

[Earthylove]

Thanks for the info, psychochick! That does make sense. Yes, fingers crossed for this cycle! The tww has been passing quickly for me. I think this is the first time I've felt that way! Usually it's painfully slow, haha.

 

[supergongjoo]

@aben maca is suppose to help with mens sperm count and mobility and help with womens fertility as well. It does wonders for libido and energy . I felt the diffrence with the powder versus the capsule almost immediately. ( the energy and libido we felt immediately. We still dont know how much better the powder is for fertility)
I got ours here:
https://thrivemarket.com/maca-magic-maca-whole-raw-powder

@psycho I was the same! My mom is chinese and my dad is part korean so i grew up with eastern everything. I rejected it growing up but now that im older im all about it lol. faint shadow could be something

@earthly im with you on avoiding early testing. I dont know anything about temps but praying for you regardless

How is my cycle twin Magic?

AFM we have decided to take the less stressful route and stop opks and tracking my cycle. I'm just going to enjoy my hubby for awhile.

 

[lesondemavie]

Thinking of you both today psycho and earthy! Looks like your twws are coming to an end. Happy testing and all the best to you!

@super: That sounds wonderful. Maybe it'll happen when you stop looking and least expect it, right?

AFM: I've decided to temp this cycle just to get more data to confirm my O day. AF was only 3 days long this round, which don't get me wrong is awesome...but concerning. First the short LP and now this...both could prevent implantation. I looked up possible causes: stress - less than usual, overweight - nope, underweight - I have lost weight since coming off bcp but my bmi is still normal, extreme exercise - pretty sure 30 minutes a few times a week is ok...so what the heck? Sorry to complain. This just really bummed me out. I'll be over it and back to O time before I know it .

 

[abennion]

So I took a cheapie this morning (two to confirm). Anyone want to weigh in?

 

[beemeck]

hi girls!

i hate when I get so busy for BNB - catching up is so hard to do once i'm behind.

abennion - thanks for the info about acupuncture! I'm sorry but I can't see anything on that test. looking at your chart I would say that you o'ed on CD 17.... which means that your bding is timed well and I think your temps are still up further along which is also great news! maybe it's a bad pic but ics are also not very sensitive. so still feeling good about you!

psycho and earthy - sending so much dust your way! really, really hoping you both get positive tests. it's about to be that time for all of us where we have been trying for so long that we are in arm's reach of our bfps!

super - glad the maca is working wonders for you! my DH takes it around O time. He does the powder - we didn't even know there was pill form. he said it tastes gross so we might have to check out the pill! I haven't tried taking it yet. my periods are super regular and not long so I haven't felt the need, but I might as well as I'm sure it won't hurt! He said he didn't notice any difference while taking it, but we are vegans so we typically have lots of energy anyway

trr - can't wait to stalk your chart as you continue temping. I am a MASSIVE chart stalker lol

afm - 5 dpo. it's going fast! yay I dunno if any of you experience O pain too, but when I have it, it's always worsened when I pee - feels like bladder muscles are pushing against my sore ovary or something. well the O pain let up, but the pain while peeing hasn't. this hasn't happened before so it's got me thinking. mostly bad thoughts about an ectopic (i've had one before) but also possible hope about a fertilized egg traveling down

 

[Earthylove]

Thanks for the support and well wishes everyone! So my cycles are usually 25-26 days long with a 10 day luteal phase. The past couple days my temp has been decreasing steadily so this morning (11dpo) I expected to see my temp drop even more and then I would start my period but instead it shot way up and was higher than it has been all cycle! my boobs are still super sore and swollen. I'll test tomorrow if AF doesn't arrive by the morning. DH is really hopeful. Trying not to get my hopes up too much!

 

[lvksa]

Hi girls I've been MIA awhile. AF came and my mother in law stayed with us for a week. Then we traveled back to his hometown for the weekend. Came back to our city and my husband traveled to Canada this past Thursday. So now I am home alone and finally with a little free time. I'm not sure what I've missed, but I'm back for a bit. No chance of trying really this cycle for me. Husband is gone for two weeks in the middle of my cycle.