Trying To Conceive #1 Only Vent Thread

[Limm]

Sat having lunch with mates when they start discussing miscarriage as a positive, lighthearted thing.

HOW? How in the world is it a positive thing? I am going through one right now and I would have punched them in their faces...and then possibly started them on fire.... Wow! That pisses me off. Sorry....

A few months ago I had to go to hospital for a heavy bleed after a positive HPT. Doctors couldn't tell me for definite if I MC or not, so hearing them say how they had a friend once who had one and thought "Oh what a relief! I dodged a bullet there!" made me upset.

It makes me wish I wasn't so reserved. I honestly would love to be able to just say what's on my mind without feeling guilty for it. Instead, I sat there and carried on eating my meal. Even DH said nothing. I think both of us are not big on getting aggressive with people. Sounds stupid, doesn't it?

 

[Marqelle93]

Here's my vent for today:

Doctors who tell you they don't know what's wrong and do nothing about it!

Here is a true personal story.
I hadn't had a period in a YEAR! I finally went to the doctor and he drew blood and tested for thyroid disease and other hormone imbalances.

He had his assistant call me with the results and she left a message saying THIS:

"So the results came back and we don't see any hormone imbalances. I don't think you need to make another appointment, he doesn't need anything else from you".

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?

So you check my blood for hormone imbalances but it doesn't occur to you to do an ultrasound or even draw more blood to check for other things?

Just one test and you don't need to see me again?

Months later I FINALLY called and told him I wanted an ultrasound. So he agreed and I got one.

They said they didn't see anything wrong with the ultrasound slides.

Again the doctor told me to wait ANOTHER 6 months and if I still wasn't ovulating to come see him again.

UGH!

 

[LoveMyTripawd]

Sat having lunch with mates when they start discussing miscarriage as a positive, lighthearted thing.

HOW? How in the world is it a positive thing? I am going through one right now and I would have punched them in their faces...and then possibly started them on fire.... Wow! That pisses me off. Sorry....

A few months ago I had to go to hospital for a heavy bleed after a positive HPT. Doctors couldn't tell me for definite if I MC or not, so hearing them say how they had a friend once who had one and thought "Oh what a relief! I dodged a bullet there!" made me upset.

It makes me wish I wasn't so reserved. I honestly would love to be able to just say what's on my mind without feeling guilty for it. Instead, I sat there and carried on eating my meal. Even DH said nothing. I think both of us are not big on getting aggressive with people. Sounds stupid, doesn't it?

No, it doesn't sound stupid. I understand. When I am in public, I tend to go silent when I hear something shocking. I ALWAYS think of this one situation that happened 8 years ago where I stayed silent and now I really wish I would have spoken up and walked out. I was having lunch out with a friend. She was engaged so I had asked her something about if she planned on having kids after getting married. She replied with "Hell no! The world is already overpopulated! I think people should kill more babies!" She was dead serious and she said it very loudly. I, of course, was shocked and when I looked around I saw that many other people had heard and where shocked too. I was much more soft spoken when I was 20, but I wish I had told her off and walked out leaving her with the bill. Her comments still haunt me to this day and it makes me sick that people actually think that way. I haven't talked to her in many years, but I think she is still childless. Thank God.

 

[tamithomas]

Sat having lunch with mates when they start discussing miscarriage as a positive, lighthearted thing.

to your friends:

https://www.gsmnation.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/Rage-Meme.jpg

 

[schultzie18]

So frustrated! I was just at my friend's son's birthday party and I was talking to my other friend that has three kids and she was like I am just so darn fertile. I just have to look at my husband and I get pregnant! Omg! And then she says she is getting to old to have anymore and she is about my age (29) and I am 28! I really wanted to punch her in her face!!!

 

[LoveMyTripawd]

So frustrated! I was just at my friend's son's birthday party and I was talking to my other friend that has three kids and she was like I am just so darn fertile. I just have to look at my husband and I get pregnant! Omg! And then she says she is getting to old to have anymore and she is about my age (29) and I am 28! I really wanted to punch her in her face!!!

You should just look at her and say "So you're too fertile, huh? You know, they have pills for that".

 

[Lazydaisys]

Love the pic tamithomas. I have the opposite problem when I can't keep me gob shut. Lol

My frend was whinging about her baby for 45 mins down the phone and she kept joking ' do
you want him?, will you take him off me?'over over and over again.

In the end i was for fucks sake, you know I'm desepeate for a baby. Why would you ring me and piss me off soooo much.(she also expecting another.) If you really don't want him. (Which I know she does.) Ill be round to collect him later!!!!

She was shocked with my outburst but she hasn't pissed me off whinging about her gorgeous baby at ths delicate time again. She does whinge about being pregnant, to which I've categorically told her. I'm not sympathetic i would love to even experience a snif a morning sickness because I would actually be pregnant after two years of trying!!! I'm a bad friend to her at moment but I'm not sure she equally understanding where I'm c obing from. Maybe it's hard when's it's just soooooooo easyfor some people to he pregnant.

Thanks for letting me rant.... I feel a bit better

 

[AlyCon]

Maybe it's hard when's it's just soooooooo easyfor some people to he pregnant.

I agree. Fertile people will never understand (unless they end up having secondary infertility, but even then they would already have a child). It's the difference between sympathy and empathy. They might be able to pity us or try to comfort us but they can never really "feel" where we're coming from. It's impossible. And it's not really fair to expect them to.

The same goes for the reverse. I haven't experienced morning sickness and the pain and discomfort of pregnancy, or the hassle of having two kids under 2. So while I agree the complaints do get under my skin, I'm sure one day we will have the same complaints. We might not shout them to heavens like some people but we will have them at least in our minds lol

Really it's just one of those things that will never change. The constant battle between the haves and the have nots :/

 

[Lazydaisys]

I know, it's not her fault. But I promise if I feel down about my ' pregnancy' I will never complain to somebody who I know is struggling to get pregnant themselves. I will save that for dh and family and friends who have been through pregnancy.

 

[ErinHopeful]

I've been TTC for 10+ months. No period in 2.5 months. Always BFN....without a shimmer of a line. Was given Provera to start my period but just kept thinking what if what if and haven't taken it yet. Lot's of dr. appts next week for me and my DH. So very tired of trying, of peeing on sticks, worrying, family keeps asking me what's wrong. All of this but still trying to stay happy and stress-free for future baby. Some days are great, some days are terrible. I never was good at waiting for what I wanted. But, here I am, waiting and praying. Thinking I might have PCOS, but I guess I'll let the dr. decide that in the near future. Why does this fertility thing have to be so tricky! I avoid every "I got pregnant on the first try" story like the plague. Well, this is my vent. In real life, I'm actually a really happy funny pleasant person to be around, but this forum is really helpful for when the angry POAS addict needs a release.
Baby dust to all!

I have to completely agree with you. I'm new to participating in these forums, but it's nice to know that I'm not alone in the struggle to conceive. I have PCOS that I've been battling for a number of years, my DH and I have been TTC for 1.5 yrs, with continued BFNs. It's extremely exhausting and frustrating. I don't like to talk about our infertility struggles with family/friends .. they just don't understand. I don't want anyones pity, I just want to be listened to and understood. DH and I are continually asked "when are you going to have a baby" "when are you going to make us grandparents?" etc .. I just wanna scream!!!!!! It is nice to be able to vent on here and share stories and frustrations .. and then share in the joys of successes .. so thank you!

 

[Dancer777]

Wish people would stop asking me when I am planning to have kids. All I ever get is "Surely its your turn now" "when are you going to have a baby" "About time you had one isnt it" ...We don't want to tell anyone we are ttc as its just more pressure!! To make things worse my partners sister has just had her 3rd so now we get even more people saying "your turn now" ...well sometimes its not that bloody easy!!!! Rant over!

 

[Marqelle93]

Wish people would stop asking me when I am planning to have kids. All I ever get is "Surely its your turn now" "when are you going to have a baby" "About time you had one isnt it" ...We don't want to tell anyone we are ttc as its just more pressure!! To make things worse my partners sister has just had her 3rd so now we get even more people saying "your turn now" ...well sometimes its not that bloody easy!!!! Rant over!

That is why I feel like I am so abnormal, because if ALL OF THESE PEOPLE are bugging the crap out of us asking when we are going to have kids, surely that means that they conceived easily on pretty much the first try, otherwise they wouldn't be so cruel.

 

[ashntony]

I am over this! I wish I had good ovaries! I am just ready for a baby!

 

[AlyCon]

You know what's fun, laying in bed and being able to hear your neighbor screaming at her kid. Yea that's real nice.

 

[Jett55]

Soo sick of being treated like I'm crazy for wanting kids or worrying about whether or not I can have any :/ I'm realizing more & more how much ppl don't understand

 

[Lazydaisys]

I'm venting about trying not to vent anymore and just be at peace!!!

 

[Nicolefunnell]

I've been TTC for 10+ months. No period in 2.5 months. Always BFN....without a shimmer of a line. Was given Provera to start my period but just kept thinking what if what if and haven't taken it yet. Lot's of dr. appts next week for me and my DH. So very tired of trying, of peeing on sticks, worrying, family keeps asking me what's wrong. All of this but still trying to stay happy and stress-free for future baby. Some days are great, some days are terrible. I never was good at waiting for what I wanted. But, here I am, waiting and praying. Thinking I might have PCOS, but I guess I'll let the dr. decide that in the near future. Why does this fertility thing have to be so tricky! I avoid every "I got pregnant on the first try" story like the plague. Well, this is my vent. In real life, I'm actually a really happy funny pleasant person to be around, but this forum is really helpful for when the angry POAS addict needs a release.
Baby dust to all!

I'm trying to stay positive but it hasn't been easy. I have been trying for 24+ months. I'm sick of people asking me when I'm going to have a baby. ( most people don't know for this exact reason) I don't want them pitying me but I hate putting on that fake smile and saying, "who knows." I feel guilty because friends and family are having babies and I want to be excited for them, but it only discourages me more. There is my vent :/

 

[Nicolefunnell]

Could not have said it better! I hope things happen soon for you but it's nice to see my exact thought written out!

 

[VP1228]

My doctor and my reproductive system sucks

 

[tamithomas]

In 24 hours I will have found out I was pregnant exactly a year ago. This is total bull that a year later I'm still ttc. Screw every fertile martyr two ways from Sunday. You suck butt holes. Then on August 11 is the day my world fell apart.