Trying To Conceive #1 Only Vent Thread

[ToriStory]

Part of me doesn't even want to test anymore; I dread it so much. I am so tired of bfns. I know I'll get another one. I feel like something's wrong, but the docs won't consider fertility testing for another six months.

I feel like a letdown and a failure.

 

[ashrc66]

I am sorry if this offends anybody just need somewhere to vent! This has nothing to do with this website or anyone on it

So, my husband and I are TTC #1 and I have not told anyone because I just don't want to have any added pressure or stress. It is difficult for me to even have a period much less ovulate to get pregnant. I think it would just be way to much for me to handle. Anyway, we went out to dinner with my parents which is on a rocky slope anyway. (Rocky slope because they didn't come to my wedding which was a destination yet they went to the same destination 3 months later for their anniversary!)
Everything was going great and I was shocked! Well the end of the night came and we headed out to our cars. We started talking and the conversation of babies came up. We have several friends and family members who have just had children or are pregnant. The next thing I know my mother (step-mother who has raised me since I was 3) starts talking and says that she wouldn't mind if my 22 yr old brother and his 18/19 yr old gf had a child. Really?! What the hell...I told her that would just be crazy because she just started college and my brother is not the most mature. She states well he is my ONLY biological kid and I would like my father's name to be passed down. It took everything in my power not to scream!!! You would rather have a immature couple who is not ready for a child to have one then your 26 yr old daughter and 31 yr old husband who own their own home and have a stable life together??
I just felt like that was a huge slap in the face! I really try not to let others comments get to me because as a great friend always tells me "you can't control the actions of others just your reactions to those actions!" ugh sometimes it is more difficult than anyone realizes!!

Do you think I'm crazy or reading too much into this?

 

[tamithomas]

I am sorry if this offends anybody just need somewhere to vent! This has nothing to do with this website or anyone on it

So, my husband and I are TTC #1 and I have not told anyone because I just don't want to have any added pressure or stress. It is difficult for me to even have a period much less ovulate to get pregnant. I think it would just be way to much for me to handle. Anyway, we went out to dinner with my parents which is on a rocky slope anyway. (Rocky slope because they didn't come to my wedding which was a destination yet they went to the same destination 3 months later for their anniversary!)
Everything was going great and I was shocked! Well the end of the night came and we headed out to our cars. We started talking and the conversation of babies came up. We have several friends and family members who have just had children or are pregnant. The next thing I know my mother (step-mother who has raised me since I was 3) starts talking and says that she wouldn't mind if my 22 yr old brother and his 18/19 yr old gf had a child. Really?! What the hell...I told her that would just be crazy because she just started college and my brother is not the most mature. She states well he is my ONLY biological kid and I would like my father's name to be passed down. It took everything in my power not to scream!!! You would rather have a immature couple who is not ready for a child to have one then your 26 yr old daughter and 31 yr old husband who own their own home and have a stable life together??
I just felt like that was a huge slap in the face! I really try not to let others comments get to me because as a great friend always tells me "you can't control the actions of others just your reactions to those actions!" ugh sometimes it is more difficult than anyone realizes!!

Do you think I'm crazy or reading too much into this?

You're not crazy at all I can see both sides of the coin. On one hand, that's very insensitive to say to you as it's a slap in the face because you're technically one of her own and it would be silly to have someone who's not ready to have kids have them and you being the responsible one not having any.

On the other hand, I can understand her need for wanting a biological grand child. It's no different then parents who want to pass down our genes and genetically as much as she loves you it won't happen with you guys. She could have been so much more sensitive in the way she said it though.

Edit: Your step mother could have kept it to herself as not everything people think has to be said.

 

[Wishing_]

I'm so upset. A old friend, who I known since I was like 12 and we recently stopped talking but before we did we both planned on ttc, is pregnant! Two months to be exact. My sister and mother just tod me. I'm so upset!

Why can't I be lucky and get pregnant already?!

 

[ashrc66]

Thank you! I completely understand the genetics portion. It doesn't help she said this during AF. So of course everything is more emotional , lol. I just think that they forget to think through their comments before blurting them out! Ugh

 

[ashrc66]

I'm sorry sweetie! I kinda know how that goes, my best friend and I stopped talking over 2 years ago and she just got married a couple months ago and is due to have her baby this year. It kinda sucks, but I think it's a girl thing! We tend to get alittle jealous when people we used to care for get what we want! OR atleast I DO maybe I shouldn't lump all women into this category. oops

Hopefully, your BFP comes soon too!!!

 

[Wishing_]

I'm going to test on Monday. See what I get before I go see my gyn on Tuesday. I'm going to get tested to see if I'm even able to get pregnant. I hope I can. I'll be devastated if I can't.

 

[madtowngirl]

Oh Wishing_, I completely understand. I was devastated when my next door neighbor (who knew about my m/c, and we had talked about wanting to be pregnant together) told me about her pregnancy via a Facebook post on her timeline. Not only is she pregnant, she's pregnant with twins, which is what I had wanted when we were making these plans years ago. I don't know which hurt more, the fact that she couldn't even tell me about it to my face, or the fact that she always seems to get what I want, with no effort.

 

[Wishing_]

Another old friend of mine is also pregnant. I only found out because her and her baby daddy works with my hubby. She was having twins but one died.

I still have hope. The hubby told me when you find out someone is pregnant there's always 5 other girls we may know that's pregnant and there could be a chance we might be one of them... The way he said it was WAY better lol.

 

[madtowngirl]

Sigh, all my telltale AF signs are here today - she's due Tuesday. I'm feeling really discouraged.

 

[Bordeaux]

Another month down the drain not happy at all clock just keeps ticking

 

[Winescotchy]

Hi, this is my first post on this site and I felt the urge to talk it out and I am hoping for some support. My husband and I have been TTC for 3 years now and only in the last 5 months have we stopped taking matters into our hands and gone to a fertility specialist and taken every test available. I completed 3 months of clomid and finally produced two "perfect" eggs this month so we went down the IUI path. My husband has been labelled the "super sperm guy" so no issues there but I was having trouble ovulating so I had 4 ultrasounds, took metformin x3 a day, iron pills x 2 a day, prenatal vitamins, and a HcG shot 36 hours before the IUI. I had so many symptons during my 2WW (dizzy spells, cramps in my uterus, headaches, difficulty around pungenet smells etc) and as I drove to the doctors this morning for my 14 day blood test and urine sample I knew something was wrong. I gave blood no problem and asked if I could give a urine sample as well just to see....well little did I know I started my period at literally the exact moment I was in the doctors office and I was all alone. I tried desperately not to get my hopes up during the wait, tried not to think about it; but in an instant it all became very real that my imagination got the best of me and I was never pregnant. I hope it gets easier to accept it just wasn't the right time for us, right now I feel like I never want to try again and I am not a quitter so this hurts! Anyone have an advice on how to get back on the horse so to speak or any tips that worked for them? I am 34 years old, my husband is 41 and we are both active and healthy. We don't drink, we don't do drugs of any kind, we cut out caffeine 3 months ago and still after all the tests that say this should work and everything looks it great it comes back with a BFN.

 

[Winescotchy]

Part of me doesn't even want to test anymore; I dread it so much. I am so tired of bfns. I know I'll get another one. I feel like something's wrong, but the docs won't consider fertility testing for another six months.

I feel like a letdown and a failure.

ToriStory, you are certainly not a failure and shouldn't think like that. 3 years of BFN's here and I know none of them are my fault. Timing is everything and I know the both of us will get a BFP as soon as it is our time. The moment we give up on ourseleves is the moment we loose the will to carry on like strong women and make this happen.

 

[Winescotchy]

I am so glad to see others feel the same way as me. I was getting so angry everytime I saw an ultrasound picture on facebook! I know they are happy and excited but it hurts sometimes to see how easy it is for some and how hard and expensive it is for others.

 

[Winescotchy]

What a great sign! I would give anything to be pregnant and have morning sickness every day for 9 months, have back aches, have mood swings, anything and everything possible just to know I have a baby inside of me!

 

[Miaw]

I feel the same exact way, I would never ever complain about any symptoms, I would love have symptoms, because I know what it means.

Others don't understand, because it was so easy for them they did not get time to really want it, I don't mean they didn't want a baby, I mean they didn't hurt and worry and cry over the fear of maybe never getting one. They got theirs before it could drive them crazy, so they forget how lucky they are.

 

[Winescotchy]

Good luck with your test in 3 days! I had my test today and it wasn't our time. Always next month!!

 

[Paoconnor29]

Hi all i am new to this site , hoping to get some advice, had the impant in my arm removed thursday last, i finished my AF last tuesday, saturday i had a tiny bit of spotting but yesterday and today i have heavy bleeding and awful stomach pains, phoned my GP and he said that this can happen to a certain few women when implant is removed. i am wondering has anyone else had the same as me. myself and my finance are TTC our first baby before our wedding in 2015 so i am hoping if this is another AF that it will be gone soon so we can try to concieve again, all this is so new to me , i dont know how i am too feel etc, i know i really want a baby and hoping it happens soon but i know it can take months. thanks all in advance

 

[Bordeaux]

If doctors told you the REAL effects of contraception

 

[Wishing_]

Today isn't my day! I got a yesterday but yet I been vomiting everything I eat and sometimes drink. I got pelvic pain, headaches and back pain. I swear I am feeling movements in my stomach and its NOT gas.

I'm so down today it isn't even funny. I'm seeing strollers, babies, pregnant ladies left and right. Even in one of my college class we were reading about having multiple babies!

A exfriend of mine started ttc two months after I did and she didn't use or do anything and she's 2 months pregnant.

Why can't my oven be baking? What's wrong with my oven?!