Trying To Conceive #1 Only Vent Thread

[ranz]

Lol u made me kinda laugh you are absolutely right! I used to do the same thing and obsess about BC! I'm married for 7 yrs now, and my DH wanted to have kids sooner, but I kept pushing it ( and we had many fights regarding this issue). I think I was terrified of being a mother, and I still am, but something changed in me, I don't know what or how to describe it.
I guess I have no other choice but to wait:s

 

[RainbowBaby13]

I know how you ladies feel. Ttc would he alot easier if we all could pregnant in the time frame that we wanted too:/ FX for our sticky positives


I honestly wish I were pregnant right now. I am hoping that next month be that special month been trying to conceive on and off for almost a year now

i follow alot of baby pages on Facebook and i just use those as tips and guides for when i finally do get pregnant II use to super bitter about other people announcing their pregnancies and seeing other pregnant ladies in general especially seein newborns.was really depressed and felt lik i was failing myself with each AF. I was always happy for them tho but would remind me of what i didn't have which is why it made me bitter. But now I'm happy and bitterless by it took time and complete self examination to get to where i am now. Hang in there ladies feel free to message me if u need someone to talk to

 

[Kallie3000]

I don't think I've really felt any bitterness about any of my friends having kids, but they have all either had trouble, or are older couples. I don't have any friends or family who have recently have 'oops' babies, or who got preggers on the first try. THAT might be hard to take.

If anything, I've been offering to babysit a lot and have wanted to spent a ton of time with my nephews and niece.

I now totally know what the 'empty arms' feeling is, at least in the TTC, wishing for my baby sense of it.

 

[RainbowBaby13]

That's good that u never felt any bitterness. I'm telling you it was bad and I was going through alot on top of that so I was just really unhappy and mad. Not bitter like that but bitter as in sad depressed and alone

yea I know what you mean by empty arms. I have family and friends who have oops babies and first try. And that's good. I heard people saying to keep busy and that works until you've settled down then all the thoughts and feelings start coming back .but I do agree that it helps tho

 

[ranz]

hmmm, I really never experienced the "empty arms" feeling. In general i don't experience strong maternity feelings, not sure if this is a bad thing or not. I don't have this overflow of emotions like most women :s perhaps i'm a bit cold, or perhaps i'd experience it when i have my own.
ppl keep asking me if i ever experience these feelings when i hold a newborn or a child, and my answer is a simple "No"! i get strange looks for that answer but I'm just bluntly honest even with myself

 

[Kallie3000]

Ranz, don't feel bad or feel like you have to have that feeling. You DON'T have to have strong maternal or 'biological' urges to be a good mom, and NOBODY has to be a mom to be a great woman!

I get pretty obsessive with things to begin with, and have an active imagination and pretty strong emotions. All together that makes me really sentimental and mushy about this stuff! haha

 

[ranz]

Thanks for being one of the few ppl who understand this! for a long time ppl around me would say " you don't understand this or that because you are not a mother" or "you won't be a complete woman without being a mother". It used to hurt a lot, but not anymore. Even me TTC is between my husband and I, no one knows about it. Thats one of the reason i am so stressing out and joined this Forum , i need ppl like yourself, Kallie, who are not judgmental and won't hold things against u. I just don't think i'll get that support from ppl around me.

Being mushy and sentimental is really cute and make it easier for ppl to relate to u

 

[ChocLover]

Ranz - I'm the same!

 

[simple]

I have been trying 2 years now.. I have irregular cycle, right now I'm at 63 days and its so frustrating because each cycle I feel a slight hope and then bam AF!! ... This month I switched to herbs. I bought Fertilaid and Fertilitea.. I also started using Red Raspberry leaves capsules a week now ..
but I'm waiting on my next cycle to start trying again

 

[dreamingmom]

I am new to posting, so I may not have all the acronyms down yet, so please bear with me. My Dh and I have been trying to conceive since our wedding in July 2013. It has been 8 months with no luck, in this time two of my bridesmaids became pregnant which just makes it more frustrating. This month the ovulation predictor I was using was negative on and around my normal ovulation time, normally day 18. I have been tracking my basal temp. and it jumped at day 20. My DH and I DTD on the morning of day 18. I figured we missed our window since I have been trying to make sure to DTD two days before my O and on the day of with no luck for the past few months. But then this morning (day 27)I vomited, I took off work, but have not vomited again, although my stomach is still off, saltines are helping. Of course my mind is instantly thinking this could be morning sickness, but I do not normally get AF until day 31 and I figured it may be later this month if my O was late, so it is too early to check. Everyone tells me "don't stress" but I swear I get EPS every month but still get my AF every month. I try not to stress but I can't. My DH is going for a test tomorrow, for his swimmers. I know it has not been a full year but he has many of the issues that go along with infertility( Smoker, HBP, HC etc..) so I figured I would stress less if I know we have a chance or can work toward fixing an issue if there is one.

 

[keep_shinin]

Let me start by saying, I love this girl with all of my heart when she is not acting like a spoiled brat! She has 2 children of her own & one step daughter. She got pregnant a couple of months ago again, which was a hard enough pill to swallow for me. When she found out, she was hysterical, saying "I don't want anymore kids, I am 22 and have 2!" Then proceeded to say, "maybe I will just miscarry it"....Yes you seen that correctly, she actually wished to miscarry this child! I was immediately disgusted with her. I really didn't have much more to say to her, so I just went home. It was a few days before I actually spoke to her again. A few weeks into her pregnancy she got what she wished for and miscarried the baby. I was even more sad about this than I thought I would be, I guess deep down (and this maybe selfish of me) I hoped if she truly didn't want the baby then maybe I could adopt it. Well, she was torn to shreds about losing this baby & I didn't have words for her except, "this is what you wanted". Now a few months have gone by and her husband is talking about wanting to try again & all she ever does to me is complain and repeat herself about not wanting any kids...yada yada yada! She even went behind his back and went on birth control!! Here I am over here struggling to get pregnant & all I hear about it this woman who could have a whole slew of kids complaining about just that...being able to get pregnant!

I am at my wits end with her & have pulled away quite a bit. Am I the one being selfish or is this (under the circumstances) a legit reason to want to end a friendship???? I am afraid if I don't get away from it I am doing to end up exploding on her & that is not very classy!

 

[ranz]

Ranz - I'm the same!

Always good to know that u r not alone

 

[Ewuramom]

I've been ttc for 4yrs+ and it's really frustrating, I'm 36. I've been diagnosed with PCOS and been on metformin for over 2yrs now. Good to know there are real people out here who share same concerns.

 

[ranz]

Let me start by saying, I love this girl with all of my heart when she is not acting like a spoiled brat! She has 2 children of her own & one step daughter. She got pregnant a couple of months ago again, which was a hard enough pill to swallow for me. When she found out, she was hysterical, saying "I don't want anymore kids, I am 22 and have 2!" Then proceeded to say, "maybe I will just miscarry it"....Yes you seen that correctly, she actually wished to miscarry this child! I was immediately disgusted with her. I really didn't have much more to say to her, so I just went home. It was a few days before I actually spoke to her again. A few weeks into her pregnancy she got what she wished for and miscarried the baby. I was even more sad about this than I thought I would be, I guess deep down (and this maybe selfish of me) I hoped if she truly didn't want the baby then maybe I could adopt it. Well, she was torn to shreds about losing this baby & I didn't have words for her except, "this is what you wanted". Now a few months have gone by and her husband is talking about wanting to try again & all she ever does to me is complain and repeat herself about not wanting any kids...yada yada yada! She even went behind his back and went on birth control!! Here I am over here struggling to get pregnant & all I hear about it this woman who could have a whole slew of kids complaining about just that...being able to get pregnant!

I am at my wits end with her & have pulled away quite a bit. Am I the one being selfish or is this (under the circumstances) a legit reason to want to end a friendship???? I am afraid if I don't get away from it I am doing to end up exploding on her & that is not very classy!

I understand what you are saying and where u r coming from. But at the end of the day this is her life and she's free to choose and decide whatever suits her and her life style. It's hard to be only with friends similar to u and ur perspectives on life and kids. I think part of friendship is respecting (not accepting) the other person's decisions even if they conflict with urs. One size doesn't fit all.

You can ask her not to talk about this subject and issue with/to you. But just ending a friendship because you disagree ( or angry) at her decision isn't right to me.

I don't know the extent and strength of ur friendship with her, but we all have flaws and faults, friends are hard to come by especially when we get older.

 

[Kallie3000]

Keep_Shinin, I completely see how much that would suck. Sorry you have to deal with that. I can see how tough it would be too, for your friend. When you want a kid and your partner doesn't, or not feeling ready for a kid - it would be enough for anyone to have dark thoughts. It doesn't mean she wouldn't be upset or sad or heartbroken about her miscarriage; I wouldn't wish that on anyone, and she would have a right to be sad whether or not it was a wanted pregnancy.

However, I wish I could give you a hug too. It is really hard to listen to someone who doesn't want a child when you want one so badly. If you need to take a break from your friendship, that might make sense. But it sounds like this person is a woman who trusts you with her deep dark secrets, so maybe it is worth continuing to be her shoulder to cry on, if you think she will be there for you as well.

 

[keep_shinin]

Thanks gals, I think I was letting my emotions get the best of me. There are a few other things that are included in how I feel, but that one kind of pushed me over the edge. I don't think I could completely cut her out of my life, but a little distance might not be a bad idea. I just needed some input from outsiders...so I could see a different perspective.

 

[Kallie3000]

Thanks gals, I think I was letting my emotions get the best of me. There are a few other things that are included in how I feel, but that one kind of pushed me over the edge. I don't think I could completely cut her out of my life, but a little distance might not be a bad idea. I just needed some input from outsiders...so I could see a different perspective.

*HUG!*

 

[RainbowBaby13]

I want to be pregnant. The end.

 

[ranz]

Tomorrow is 8 DPO, I'm so tempted to test but scared :s I feel it's been a loong week, and can't wait more

 

[Bruins girl]

Hey ladies..
Just came across this site and I thought why not I'll join!
This morning I'm very frustrated.. So I feel like I need to vent and possibly read some people's stories..
So the last 3 months my period was coming on or near the same time.. However this month I was 10 days late .. After taking some tests and getting a negative reading I still had hope. However I woke up this morning and surprise I got my lady thing ( you know what I mean) I was 10 days late so I was hoping. My husband and I have been trying for 2 months.. I haven't been on the pill in a long while. Now I know stress is a big factor when trying to conceive. I have been getting bad migraines and that doesn't help however I'm so frustrated. Now I'm wondering when are ovulation days? Bc this Month I was 10 days late.I'm usually done my period by now. I'm just confused I'm nervous annoyed it's not fun! Anyways sorry for the rant but would love to talk to people who are experiencing this.
Ps- I think I posted in the wrong section at first sorry new member!