Trying To Conceive #1 Only Vent Thread

[lady124]

"Just stop trying and it will happen"

SERIOUSLY?! We are LESBIANS! If we stop trying there will be no sperm and therefore definitely no baby!!!

Fab. Couldn't help but chuckle. Some people' s comments are priceless...

 

[OviesSpermies]

Hi Ladies!

I’ve love to join this thread. I’m turning 40 in October and TTC #1 since November, I’m in my 8th cycle and slowing going insane!

Currently 10 DPO and no unusual symptoms. Used SoftCups, hoping it made a difference, stressing big time!

If AF arrives DH is going for his tests. Still I'm going bonkers, this is taking too long, so far been the most challenging thing I've ever done, never thought it would be so difficult...

Buckets and buckets of to us all!
xxx

 

[DragonflyLvr]

Hi Ladies!

I’ve love to join this thread. I’m turning 40 in October and TTC #1 since November, I’m in my 8th cycle and slowing going insane!

Currently 10 DPO and no unusual symptoms. Used SoftCups, hoping it made a difference, stressing big time!

If AF arrives DH is going for his tests. Still I'm going bonkers, this is taking too long, so far been the most challenging thing I've ever done, never thought it would be so difficult...

Buckets and buckets of to us all!
xxx

8 months is not long although it can fell that way. Average length of TTC for a normal couple is 7 to 13 months. Depends on the person really and the couple.

Wishing you the best

 

[Kallie3000]

"You are so lucky you don't have kids, so you can go home and have a nap whenever you want!"

Yeah. Right. Thanks.

 

[trij]

Sooo... I need to get some thoughts/feelings out and this seems to be the right place.

My husband and I have been TTC (our first) for almost a year now. The last months have been torture to say the least - mostly for me. I guess you all know that feeling of waiting for af to come and then being disappointed once a month.

My periods are regular, not exactly clockwork but stay within a certain frame. Finally 3 weeks ago af actually didn't come... I've been late a couple of times but then only 1-4 days, usually because of stress. Now, 23 days later I still haven't gotten my period. I've been experiencing some symptoms - sensitive nipples, light cramping, bloating, tiredness - all which are regular for me before a period, except the sensitive nipples. They've really been killing me some days and then some days I'm ok.

A week before af was due my husband and I DTD and afterwards I had a burning, itching sensation "down there" for 3 days. There was light spotting as well but I thought that perhaps I had gotten a bit of a yeast infection and decided to wait before going to the doctor. 3 days later I was ok and the itching/burning went away. Since then I've increased discharge (clear and not smelling) for the last weeks. Now it seems to be decreasing a bit. (sorry if TMI!)

I've taken 6 HPTs the last 3 weeks and all have been negative. I've tested different brands and been very careful in how and when I test. So basically I'm going a bit crazy. I've long since lost a clear idea of what can be classified as symptoms and what is just me desperately wanting to be pregnant. And after months of waiting for af not to come it is driving me crazy to only get BFN and still not being sure that I'm not pregnant!

I don't want to get my hopes up but I'm really having a hard time not to. I plan on going to a gynaecologist next week. Where I live they don't do blood tests right away but they would do an ultrasound on my womb to see if there is any sign of a PG. I just feel so stupid right now and scared of coming off as stupid/desperate when I visit the gyn as the crazy/paranoid girl trying to get pregnant...

sorry for the long post...

 

[hmmohrma]

I found this forum this afternoon, and I have been reading posts all afternoon. My husband and I just started ttc this past month. I am 30 (I know not high risk age yet), but I have always been concerned about my fertility due to several women in my family having issues in the past. Surprisingly, I tested positive several days ago and was over the moon! I took another test yesterday and the line was lighter. This morning I woke up feeling crampy, and by the afternoon I was spotting. Full blown bright red and clots by the evening along with a lot of abdomen and back pain. I am assuming this is a chemical, but I have a physical scheduled this week where I can get more details. My husband was very excited to hear we were positive, but the loss has not been hard on him. I had a good cry earlier, and he was very supportive...just not able to relate. Reading the posts on this forum helped me feel so much less alone. I tried to explain to him that I have this constant reminder in the form of pain and blood, but I am happy to know that I am able to conceive. I know there are people who have been trying a lot longer, but we have been together almost nine years and were waiting for the right time. I am so ready now, and I would love to have this place as somewhere to vent and have discussions with people who understand my emotions.

 

[Frenchgal]

This month has been the WORST, Sooo many symptoms, but so scared of testing too early and getting another ...

 

[RainbowBaby13]

just found out one of my younger friends is pregnant. wasn't upset just surprised. if she can pregnant well I can only assume I am next

 

[hmmohrma]

I was having a discussion with my DH last night about my emotions after my chemical last week (and emotions in general), and he believes I should make an attempt to control them. I told him to research the difference in male and female brain chemistry and physiology. He tries to be so understanding, but he seriously worries about my health (stress wise). I really think my reaction to this ordeal has not been out of line. There was some crying, but I also made it through our nephew's 3rd bday party with lots of kiddos and pregnant women without flipping out. I think that is worth something...I hold it together all the time...he just has to deal with me in the comfort of our home. I know he just worries about me, but I wish there was a way for him to understand what it feels like. Can anyone relate?

 

[Kallie3000]

I was having a discussion with my DH last night about my emotions after my chemical last week (and emotions in general), and he believes I should make an attempt to control them. I told him to research the difference in male and female brain chemistry and physiology. He tries to be so understanding, but he seriously worries about my health (stress wise). I really think my reaction to this ordeal has not been out of line. There was some crying, but I also made it through our nephew's 3rd bday party with lots of kiddos and pregnant women without flipping out. I think that is worth something...I hold it together all the time...he just has to deal with me in the comfort of our home. I know he just worries about me, but I wish there was a way for him to understand what it feels like. Can anyone relate?

Generally, you are going through the following feelings and physical process:
- Hormonal withdrawal and changes, from the physical process, that create real changes within your brain chemistry
- Grieving an actual loss. For some women they have lost a child, for other women they don't feel that but they have lost the plans, dreams, expectations, and everything else that goes along with that BFP.
- Dealing with fear, worry, and lack of knowledge about the future - what does this mean for our future pregnancies, is there a deeper problem, and how long will the process take?

One week is a very short grieving time, and everyone deals with things differently. You may need to talk to a professional instead of trying to make your husband understand; it is good he is trying, but his worrying about your stress level can make it seem to you like you aren't allowed to have the grieving process, when it is only natural for you to need to express your emotions.


I just had a chemical too - and this is how I feel about it!

 

[lady124]

I was having a discussion with my DH last night about my emotions after my chemical last week (and emotions in general), and he believes I should make an attempt to control them. I told him to research the difference in male and female brain chemistry and physiology. He tries to be so understanding, but he seriously worries about my health (stress wise). I really think my reaction to this ordeal has not been out of line. There was some crying, but I also made it through our nephew's 3rd bday party with lots of kiddos and pregnant women without flipping out. I think that is worth something...I hold it together all the time...he just has to deal with me in the comfort of our home. I know he just worries about me, but I wish there was a way for him to understand what it feels like. Can anyone relate?

Totally. A couple of weeks after my miscarriage,some friends organised a lunch out with other couples with new born babies and toddlers. I decided not to go, but my husband thought i should have pushed myself. Several months on, I still think I t was the right thing to do. You need to be allowed to grieve, and come out of it in your own time.

 

[hmmohrma]

Kallie - I am certainly worried about the future. I have read several times that many women mc with the first and then have healthy subsequent pregnancies, but it's hard not to read the other statistics. I feel better overall, but I have these random waves of sadness. It's kind of strange, but I had a physical today and the doctor cleaned the last of the blood away for me. She said this will also help with ttc when we are ready. I don't want to rush and feel like I didn't grieve properly, but I also am sooooo ready for the next step. The doc. also told me she recommends bd every 5 days. This was the first time I heard this, but she said it give sperm time to grow maximum tails for the best swimming possible. She also said every 5 days makes sure there is some living sperm hanging around in there throughout the cycle. I feel like this will be a lot easier than trying to keep up with every other day for two weeks at a time. That became stressful for DH (the whole planned sex thing wasn't as sexy/romantic/whatever after the first few times) and that made me stressed. I want us to enjoy this...especially since it is potentially the end of our time as just the two of us.

 

[Kallie3000]

It only takes one time to get pregnant, technically!

 

[charmed16]

A thread for venting! I just want to vent about my boyfriend. I'm trying my hardest and he can be so negative. Its nice to meet all you ladies who are ttc. My name is Stacy. I'm 27. I hope we all succeed in having a baby. I'm on my first monnth of TTC. I wish those ladies who have been trying for months or years the most of luck. I was on birth control for 5 years, got off the pill last month. I'm hoping my body snaps back to its regular self. Or I just get pregnant!

 

[hmmohrma]

A thread for venting! I just want to vent about my boyfriend. I'm trying my hardest and he can be so negative. Its nice to meet all you ladies who are ttc. My name is Stacy. I'm 27. I hope we all succeed in having a baby. I'm on my first monnth of TTC. I wish those ladies who have been trying for months or years the most of luck. I was on birth control for 5 years, got off the pill last month. I'm hoping my body snaps back to its regular self. Or I just get pregnant!

Good luck and lots of dust to you! I am only in my second cycle of ttc. Are you taking folic acid or other vitamins?

 

[PrincessMeka]

I technically have been TTC for a year now but my husband and I live in different states for that last year so only get a chance to BD 4 months a year and the last 2 visits I was not Ovulating so that was a wasted. but his transfer will be official in September so I have started taking my iron pills and Folic Acid , tracking my Ovulation time and keeping up with my temp. I even started buying diaper(when they are on sale ) and baby essentials car seats, bouncers, etc I know I'm crazy worst case I have some awesome baby shower gifts for my friends and family .... baby dust for everyone

 

[RainbowBaby13]

I hope this is my cycle

 

[PrincessMeka]

I hope this is my cycle

I will def keep my fingers and toes cross for you

 

[Kallie3000]

I technically have been TTC for a year now but my husband and I live in different states for that last year so only get a chance to BD 4 months a year and the last 2 visits I was not Ovulating so that was a wasted. but his transfer will be official in September so I have started taking my iron pills and Folic Acid , tracking my Ovulation time and keeping up with my temp. I even started buying diaper(when they are on sale ) and baby essentials car seats, bouncers, etc I know I'm crazy worst case I have some awesome baby shower gifts for my friends and family .... baby dust for everyone

I really suggest you don't go TOO crazy buying stuff - then you get to save the excitement for when you have a bump to show off at the same time!

 

[Kallie3000]

I hope this is my cycle

Hopefully we will all get our sticky baby beans this cycle! Good luck to you!